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The Voidwalker's Tale: Fallen Paradise

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Zusammenfassung

A world on the verge of collapse. Aelyrae and humanities remnants, at each other's throats. Neither side was safe — but their ideals were firm. Every person, no matter where from, has been affected differently. Each person on the planet of Hyethour has their own tale, a story of battles and hardships. Reimi Laurier happened to be one of those people. Devil's blood ran through her veins, but she was meant to be 'human'. Forever a curse that kept her locked away, a disease that also ravaged her body in spasms. She wished to be free. From her body and this rotten world. There was no right path or answer to get there; ultimately, walking into the void beyond would be the only way to find out.

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Chapter 1Reason to Live (Prologue)

The devil was anxious

His arm quaked with fear, even with the lightest of feathers that rested in his large hands. The baby softly cried, his child — kept making noise. Panic seeped in; what had he done? Blood continued to slither across the grass to stain it in red that shone gold. His reflection rippled in the thick of it, the body of his lover; his wife, this child's mother, lay motionless with nothing but a mellow smile left.

This feeling seemed to expand the more he thought. It latched onto his heart, digging into it with fangs of guilt and sorrow. He had never felt anything like this before, in his many millennia alive. A heat across his cheeks, a line of pink with beads of sweat to dance. A being of divine power should feel no such things. All the warmth in his face, the build-up of tears in his sharp eyes, it was all a reminder that even he had a shred of humanity. Something that was forcefully carved into his heart. A gift meant to last forever, or at least for many more years to come. 

That sparkle of light, humanity, started to slip away. He gazed upon his offspring, the wailing and whining grew louder and louder the longer he held her. He couldn't father something like this. Such a frail and weak child… that gripped onto his finger, seemingly asking for warmth. Something that he could not give. The crying was painful, not only to hear but… to walk away from. The child's hands, or perhaps a soul from beyond, pulled on his red strings. He gritted his teeth, fangs laying bare — with a glare in his eyes, but tears as a mask. He had no right to be the father of this human, even if they were bound by blood. 

The child now sprawled by her dead mother. It was out of the devil's hands. Gentle scents of salt laced the air, as ironclad boots bounced against the earth in an annoyingly systemic rhythm. As the footsteps grew louder, the devil shifted away behind a large tree. The width of the trunk was just enough to hide away his massive body. In a mere moment, an elderly woman sprinted into the open plain. She was dressed shabbily, in commoner's rags mostly covering up her entire frame. The only pop of color was in the child she held in her arms. 

In the midst of her motion, she tripped face-first against a large root, landing centimeters away from the crimson pool. A shriek and ghastly scream filled the devil's ears; followed by a thud. Abrasively, she shot back up onto her knees, examining the body that rested in front of her. 

Her sweaty palms raised the lady's head. "My queen, who-how, what has happened-" The woman cried.

The child she had dropped now stood up beside her, without an ounce of fear in her eyes. Not quite a baby, maybe around two or three years old. Her eyes were akin to an ocean. That messy blonde hair… and those damned wings. They were tiny, but there was no mistaking it. All she needed was a filthy halo, but if she was down here in the mortal realm, that could only mean one thing anyway. Thrown away by Mikael, like garbage, to be a treasure for humans. A pitiful fate. 

That small angel continued to stare at the lonely baby, her expression practically melting by the second. The cold and calm demeanor slowly started to fade away —morphing into a gaze filled with warmth. She got down on her knees, folding back her legs to sit, and picked up the child. Her hands were steady, one around the body, and the other gently resting on her chest. A kinder smile poked its way through, as the sun also gleamed its way through the clouds, illuminating the small space they all occupied. The elderly woman tried to compose herself amidst the sun's sudden gaze. She shouted incoherent nonsense at the little angel, before turning tail the way she came from. 

However, nothing changed for that girl. 

She continued to hold the baby dear, with words of a sweet sort leaving her lips. As the minutes went by, more guards and the woman came rushing back to the scene. The panicked looks on their faces didn't match what they had come back to in the slightest. With the grass beginning to glow, it had seemed the queen's blood gave birth to new life — in more ways than one. 

Flowers began to bloom without a care in the world. They swayed along the currents of wind, slowly adrift to surround the two girls. The hue of petals matched almost perfectly with the tones of blue illuminating the sky. In the center of it all were the two of them, somehow creating a protective bubble to the suffering of the outside world. Life was in motion but at the same time, everything felt still. The angel held the baby without a dime of knowledge. Choosing to give her compassion and empathy as if it were instinct itself. It was the perfect reason — ostensibly none at all. 

With the crying lulling and slowly blending into the serene world around them. 

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ash_knight17 · Fantasie
4.9
332 Chs

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NocturnOwl
NocturnOwlLv13

My readthrough of this story, was very enjoyable I haven't had to much experience in the Yuri genre but it's safe to say that the relationship written into this story is complex and very adorable. The dynamic and dichotomy between the two characters is very well depicted making the two female leads have a yin and Yang feel to them in how they balance each other out. Writing quality is very nice. Had a clear an easy time visualising the environment, characters and threats. High amounts of detail are given towards painting the overall picture of the story. Allowing the story to feel very life-like when delivering these descriptions for the reader. I really enjoyed the character design, the two female leads are so much fun to read through. Their conversational dynamics and the way their personalities bounce off each others quirks is so adorable. This is just the beginning of their budding relationship so I can't wait to see how they develop into a couple. The characters are also given clear mindsets for the reader to understand where the character is mentally and why they do said actions of behaviours. Updating stability is consistent, considering how meaty each chapter is. Lots of content per chapter allowing me to be perfectly fine with it coming out weekly just for the sheer amount written. World background is delivered very slowly to the reader, this allows for alot of mystery to sprout in the reader's mind over what the world setting is and how it became this way. There is already a level of depth in the world for the pieces that are revealed to the reader such as the angels and their culture. Don't want to spoil too much. Overall I was captivated throughout the whole story, making the time fly by in the process of reading through this. The characters feel real and so do their emotions. Im really excited to see how the relationships develop as well the world and which seeds will get developed first. Keep going strong Yeon your story is wonderful :D.

hidingpanduh
hidingpanduhLv12

From the beginning we get a good idea of what’s to come in terms of character and the descriptive quality of the story. The images described are shocking in the gruesome detail and it feels like I’m able to imagine everything in HD. The first chapter is the best so far, because it feels the most focused. The focus on the hook is great because it makes the reader want to be invested, and I love the first few paragraphs. The meeting of Astrid and Reimi is intriguing and makes me wonder why suddenly people are interested in Reimi when it seems they avoided Reimi before. I like the contrast between Astrid and Reimi, like night and day. Astrid is a bright sunny star and Reimi is a dark mysterious moon. I also think it’s interesting that Reimi doesn’t even speak until chapter four! Some things that can be improved include having a better balance between action scenes and descriptive paragraphs. I think chapter two is so action-packed, it seems there’s an imbalance between descriptions of setting and the action. A suggestion when going back to edit is to balance the action scenes by adding some more descriptive elements otherwise it feels like BAM BAM BAM one big action or fight after the other. Another point is in terms of plot, I don’t see a clear desire or direction. There is definitely a lot of conflict and elements in the story that could add to the direction! But I wonder for the character development, how will that work itself out? I like how there’s something like an alliance forming between Astrid and Reimi and the way Astrid protects Reimi is so sweet. I don’t think we need a full idea of the plot since that should unravel as the story goes on but it would be nice if during the story there’s some kind of desire of the character for Reimi especially I would love to see a stronger motivation (love/revenge/identity) though I think there is already a great base for a possible focus on Reimi’s identity. Overall it’s super enjoyable so far and I look forward to reading more!

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