rest of my life...

at the football grassfield of school i was feeling that feeling

that inmense feeling that the oportunity of my career brought just like an asteroid could hit the earth at any time like this one girl chances, just happens in a lifetime.

so i had a very tought decision to make,

what do i want to do for the rest of my life , to be a looser or to be a ruler.

So as im layin dead or slowly dying mentally and spiritually on the floor of the football grassfield of the school ,i panic and kinda like stud there kinda like in shock without realizing what life really meant to be. as if i had forgot the most important life lesson that my angels had tought me, never was a devoted religious i must confess i smoke and drink at partys at seventeen but this time i really wanted something diferent for my life and my future wife.

I wanted to be responsable you know, a responsable man , i wanted to stop, i wanted to stop lying , end the cycle of lies that i grew up with, i couldnt even think about how others were in exact same situation than me ,i wanted to change ,to be someone diferent not just for the money or for her but for myself you know not in a selfish way but to find myself so i can then bring some help to the ones who deserve to become better maybe. And mostly i wanted to stop lying to my self ...

how could i had ben living in a lie this whole time.

wthout realizing there was something more

and then it hit me.

i dont know why am here but werever is the reason i definately wanted to change so that i would never stop being myself and for that i had to find myself first...