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Spider-Man: A New Spiral

It's an idiot's dream come true, I'm Spider-Man. So if life is a game, play it beautifully. Spider-Man (1994), Marvel Comics, The Amazing Spider-Man / The New Adventures of Spider-Man, The New Spider-Man, The Amazing Spider-Man, The Amazing Spider-Man, The Amazing Spider-Man (crossover) Love Interest: Peter Benjamin Parker (Spider-Man)/Mary-Jane Watson (MJ)/Felicia Sarah Hardy (Black Cat) Subscribe at patreon.com/FanFictionPremium. With advanced chapters, an extra chapter in your honour.

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115 Chs

Punishment in Hell's Kitchen

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***

 

17 April.

Late evening. Warehouse by the bay.

Maxwell Dillon.

- Careful, you idiots, the merchandise is very valuable, so don't get hurt!

Kingpin's personal bodyguard, and now part-time chief officer over the boss's battle groups, Max was enjoying his new position. And with it, an increased salary.

This time, Ambal had given his faithful assistant a very important order - to deliver this shipment of weapons to all the warehouses in New York at all costs. It cost Kingpin a tidy sum from an Albanian ex-military leader turned terrorist.

The guns would be enough to double-arm all the Ambala boys and permanently cut off any friction that might arise with Kingpin's "business partners" or outside street associations.

So Dillan's a little nervous, and these idiots are making a mess of it.

Once again, there was the sound of a crate falling.

- What kind of degenerate am I gonna fry to a crisp this time?!

***

At this time,

Hell's Kitchen Warehouse.

Spider-Man.

- Sorry I'm late," I say as I land on the roof.

Upstairs, Daredevil is waiting, standing at the edge; Strongman and Iron Fist, propping up the antenna; and, with her hands in her pockets, Jessica Jones.

- You're not late," Matt muttered, "Hi, by the way," he finished a little more softly.

- Yeah, hi," I replied with a smile.

- Nice suit," Jess said.

- Thanks, and that's a cool leather jacket," I returned the compliment.

Jones just chuckles in response.

- All right, why don't we get down to business? - Luke, unrestrained as ever, gets to the point.

- I agree," Murdock nods.

We gather in a small circle.

- So, our target," I start to talk about the plan, "is the harbour warehouse by the bay. Head north from here. According to my information, this warehouse has the largest stockpile of weapons, which Fisk then ships all over the city.

- Who's the informant? - Jess asks.

- A reliable source," I replied, a little crumpled.

Well, I can't say that my source is the second biggest criminal in the city after Fisk, can I?

- What about the amount of security?

It's a good thing Danny trusts me enough not to worry about information. Judging by Luke and Jess not listening, they don't really care about the source either.

- There's a lot of guys out there. Forty at best, armed to the teeth.

- And at worst? - Matt's poking around.

- Worst case? Almost the entire Kingpin fighting force, led by his personal guard, Electro.

- Electro? - Cage interjects with a raised eyebrow, "What kind of idiotic nickname is that?

- It's aptly named. This guy can control electricity. Very powerful and dangerous," I looked at my allies in turn, "We've faced each other once, and, alas, I was not the winner of that fight, so," I slapped my palms lightly across the air, "let's make a deal, if Lightbulb's there, I'll take him on, okay?

- Old scores," Jessica nods silently, "nothing against it.

- Agreed," Cage says curtly, "so are we going or what?

- Wait!" I stop the impetuous Cage, "we need to talk about how we're going to do this.

- What do you mean? - Luke stares at me, uncomprehending.

The rest of the group, though restrained, don't quite get it, either, judging by their looks.

- You see," I said to all the heroes, "by and large, we're used to acting alone. If I'm not mistaken, Daredevil and Iron Fist will see each other in battle for the first time tonight, won't they?

With a quick glance, Rand and Murdoch nod curtly.

- So what do you suggest? - Jessica asks.

- Well, we don't have time to perfect teamwork, so I suggest we develop a plan to act as a team and not screw each other over, do you hear me?

It doesn't take long for my allies to look at each other.

- Well, spit it out," Matt agrees.

"Not bad already, at least they'll listen."

- So, DD and Danny are hand-to-hand, they're better suited to attacking enemies from above or from the shadows, or better yet, both. If we go in through the main entrance as immortals, they're gonna have a hard time. Luke and Jess are our main strike force, both with superhuman strength and some degree of superstrength. It's a perfect set-up to draw fire. Me, support, I'll be able to cover everyone.

Everyone listened until Cage spoke up.

- That's all very nice, but what's the point of all these schemes? - Carl said impatiently.

- Because not all of us can take a shot from an RPG, Mr Unbreakable Skin," I said, a little irritated.

Luke gives me an indignant look, but stops talking.

- So, Fist and Daredevil and I will go up to the roof and take out the observers, then I'll go down to the ground and take out the guards who can spot Luke and Jess. After that, me and the strike team will make some noise in the warehouse, at which time our ninjas will start taking out the shooters from above. If it's not too hot, join us on the ground. And, still reminding you, Electro is mine.

- Looks like the new suit unlocks new talents," the lovely lady of our team muttered, clapping me on the shoulder, "Great plan.

- I agree, well thought out, Spidey," Danny also praises me.

- Pragmatic enough, I'm sure it'll work," Matt smiles slightly at me.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're a genius, so are we going? - Cage is in a hurry again.

- Let's move out.

*

Half an hour later.

Warehouse by the Gulf.

New York's street heroes.

- I count four on the roof and two checking out the area," Iron Fist says.

- There's about two dozen more all along the dock, but they're far away and we'll have time to deal with them in the warehouse," Matt said.

- Okay, you remember the plan. Luke and Jess, get through the crack in the fence, if they notice you, try to knock them out, but it's better to sneak behind those containers, - Spider pointed at the pile of metal crates near the building, - Daredevil, Fist, let's go.

The heroes sprang into action.

Luke and Jess carefully climbed down. The stealthy fighters jumped onto the containers and quietly began to make their way to their target.

- Hey, Bill, is there a light? - One of the gunmen asked.

- Ricky, you're crazy, get back to your post!

- Come on, who's crazy enough to try and interfere with the loading?

A second after the thug's comment, a baton flew into the back of his head. Before his partner could react, he was hit in the jaw with a glowing fist and Bill immediately lost consciousness.

- Not bad, boys," said Spider-Man, carrying the two bound criminals on his shoulders.

- Did you get all four of them? - Danny asked.

- No one else on the roof," Horny confirmed, surveying the area with his radar.

- Okay, we can get down through these two windows, I suggest we split up, Daredevil, you take the right, Danny the left, I'll follow Jess and Luke, as soon as you hear about the fight downstairs, start filming everyone on the ledges.

The handgunners nodded in response to Spider's plan.

Arachnid walked to the edge and peered out slightly.

The harbour was quite large, and that was a plus, as nearly a third of all the fighters here today were spread out around the perimeter, near the warehouse, with five fighters on either side. The ones interfering with Jones and Cage's quiet approach are circling their points every three minutes, two of them. The young men must be taken down quickly.

Realising his task, Spiderweb began to descend down the right shadowy side of the warehouse.

Jumping over to a container, he fired a web at a smoking bandit with an M16. Pulling the soldier to him, the hero, in one precise movement, knocked out the bandit, just in case, tying and taping his mouth, left him on the container.

As he approached the container, Spidey heard a small noise, and going behind the wall, he saw Jones and Cage sucking passionately near the body of another downed criminal.

- Aren't you two crazy?! - Spider hissed in displeasure.

- Oh," Jess exclaimed quietly, pushing Luke away.

- I'm fucking happy for you, of course, and you'll tell me how it turned out," Stenolaz pointed at Sylach, rubbing the back of his head, "but now we're on a mission, it's time.

Without saying anything else, the team's strike force moved towards the warehouse.

As they approached from the right side, the heroes nodded to each other.

Luke and Jess ran up to the main warehouse gate and, at the same time, grabbed the flaps and noisily ripped out most of the door that was hiding the interior.

- Hey, guys, we heard you were having a party, so we thought we'd drop by," Spiderweb said cheerfully as he jumped over his colleagues and got inside.

The warehouse was huge. There were boxes everywhere, and three lorries in a row near the exit, getting ready to move out.

Bandits with machine guns were scattered all over the place. Upstairs alone there's a dozen men on each side.

Downstairs there are at least thirty. In the distance, by a small building, some sort of office, stands Electro, before the heroes burst in, reprimanding another underachiever.

- Well, well, well, well, I thought this was going to be boring.

After Dillan's brief comment, all the thugs in the warehouse open fire on the heroes.

- Oh, shit! - Spider said, hiding from the dense stream of fire behind a large shipping crate.

Jess and Luke approached him. They certainly hadn't expected such a welcome.

- Danny and Daredevil are going to start knocking out the guys from above, we can't set them up," Spider began to reason quickly, "we jump out and attack the shooters at the same time.

Having finished, Spider jumped on the container and, clinging to the stairs of the first floor, began to fly around the firing opponents, distracting some of them.

Cage and Jones inexplicably did not wait for anything and immediately moved on the two nearest groups of shooters.

Not expecting bullets to bounce off their opponents, the soldiers were confused.

Spider did not hesitate to take advantage of this, disarming a small group of bandits with his web.

At this time, as true servants of the ninja cause, Iron Fist and Daredevil, quietly and methodically began to knock out the shooters on the sashes, managing not even to attract the attention of the other bandits standing there, who were fully focused on the Spider and a couple of impenetrable.

Electro watched in shock as a huge man and a fragile-looking girl rammed into the main mass of his fighters, calmly ripping out and breaking the automatic rifle of one of the shooters. Then Max noticed that there was no supporting fire from above, he looked up and saw that most of the guys on the sashes had already been taken out of the game, and the rest were fighting with Daredevil and some guy in a green suit.

- No, this isn't going to work! - Dillan took off his jacket and began to warm up, aiming at the metal casement where the Hell's Kitchen Defender was fighting the two thugs.

Stenolaz, who had noticed the supervillain's actions, shot out a web, and swung with a two-legged pendulum at Electro, knocking him back several metres.

- Hey, Sparkle, remember me? - Friendly Neighbour asked jokingly, slamming his fist into his palm. - If not, I'll remind you, I owe you a couple of punches for last time.

- Flyboy, are you? Nice suit, I'm sure it charred even better than the last one! - Dillan shouted, shooting a stream of electricity at his opponent.

Expecting this, Spidey began to dodge the enemy's shots.

While the superhero battles the supervillain, attracted by the noise, three battle groups began to approach the warehouse. Only the group at the West Gate did not move.

- Stop dodging! - Electro shouted angrily, growing more and more enraged.

The flow of charges directed at the Spider increased, and now the hero had to completely dissolve in sensations, relying on his Sense, although the recurring feeling of slight resistance still interfered.

Finally, the glowing Maxwell fired a powerful stream into the ceiling of the warehouse, piercing the roof and sending a medium force charge at everyone inside.

Thankfully, it was his men who were mostly hit. Strongman and the brunette felt only a strong itch, Fist and Devil were hit a little harder. Matt was even shaken.

After such a strong outburst, Dillan had lost his fuse slightly.

The spider noticed it and went into counterattack: approaching his opponent, the arachnid shot a web at his enemy's face, blocking his view and, making a slash, jumped up, hitting his opponent in the body with his leg, thus sending Sparkle into another short flight.

- I've been waiting for you to use up your charge," Stenolaz said as he approached his opponent, who was furiously trying to tear the cobwebs from his face.

At that time, reinforcements started running into the warehouse.

Luke and Jess, as well as Iron Fist and Daredevil, who had dealt with their opponents, took care of the fighters.

As the most invulnerable, Cage, with a wild roar, lunged at the crowd of gunmen, trying to draw most of the fire on himself. The brunette detective was far behind him. Danny and the Infernal Defender tried to stay behind and attack, either by breaking away from the main group of soldiers or by flying into a crowd that wasn't ready to fight the rapidly approaching enemy.

- What can I say, you're doing a bad job, Sparkle, the boss won't give you a hard time," the arachnid mocked his opponent.

Enraged, Electro burned off the spider web that was covering his mouth.

- We'll see who's who," the supervillain's eyes began to fill with yellow light.

Not intending to wait for his opponent to gain strength, Spidey approached his foe and, rolling under him, kicked him in the back, pushing Electro into the wall.

Deciding that playing push-back was pointless, Spidey began firing webs at his opponent. Many of the strands burned away, barely touching the body of the electric villain, but Spidey continued to intensify the flow, interrupting to deliver blows to his opponent's body, leg, torso, head, the main thing was to hit and keep his focus.

Maxwell was taking more and more damage by the minute, he began to lose himself in space.

Once again, firing two strands, Spider threw his opponent upwards and slammed Dillan against the concrete floor of the warehouse with all his might, finally knocking out the villain.

- Fuhhh, tough son of a bitch.

Finally finished with his adversary, Spidey noticed several of the thugs waking up and starting to scatter to their trucks.

Meanwhile, in the street in front of the warehouse, a vicious battle was taking place between the New York street heroes and the remaining thugs guarding the harbour. The good guys dominated. Luke was the biggest contributor to the battle, handing out about a dozen soldiers, Jess wasn't far behind. Matt and Danny were cleaning up the leftovers.

With the crackle of rubber, lorries began to move out of the warehouse.

- People, follow the trucks, I'll stay here and deal with the others, - realising that it was impossible to let the vehicles with the cargo go, Spider threw the order.

Daredevil and Iron Fist managed to climb on the roofs of the cars, Jess jumped into the open trailer, and Luke grabbed the wall.

Spider began to knock out the remaining criminals one by one, his partners had thinned out their ranks.

Having finished with the last one, the hero in black began to accelerate the webbing of the enemies to prevent them from escaping again. Returning to the warehouse, he did the same to the bandits there.

Having swaddled Electro, the Friendly Neighbour was about to call the police when a stirring of Spidey Sense made him turn around to the ruined warehouse entrance.

***

Half an hour earlier.

Frank Castle/Caratel.

A former Marine, had arrived at the warehouse by the bay, about to swoop down on one of the largest concentrations of bandits in recent memory. Frank has only recently arrived in New York and has spent the last couple of months gathering information on the state of affairs in the city, taking out small drug gangs along the way.

Here, the Punisher hadn't yet earned a formidable reputation like he had in Chicago or Washington. But it was time to come home.

Castle was born in Queens and grew up on these streets, but he had to move to Chicago for duty. It was there, during a showdown between local mobsters, that he lost everything.

After burying his wife and children, Frank vowed to wipe out crime and went to war on the Mafia families of Chicago. Then, Antonio Gazilini put him on the trail of the head who ran the clans in Washington.

In the capital of his country, to whose service he had given several decades of his life, Castle met resistance in the form of particularly zealous FBI agents. Despite his nickname, the Punisher did not intend to harm the servants of the law, honestly performing their military duty.

But they made Frank's job much more difficult.

Eventually, Castle got to the local mob boss, Fredo Lucini. Storming his estate had been one of the most difficult challenges, but thanks to his military skills and, the most important virtue in his business, his cold and methodical brutality, he had dealt with anyone who posed a threat.

Bursting into the office, Frank ignored the Italian's threats, which quickly turned into pleas. Having put a bullet in the mafioso's head, the Punisher was going to get away, but decided, for the first time in a long time to gather information. Still, the leader of a criminal cell had to know a lot about the other criminals.

Castle got the information from Fredo's computer. And he was unpleasantly surprised. It turned out that the Italian clan was only the tip of the iceberg, a huge criminal network covered the whole of America and spread its influence even on the whole world. And at the centre of it all was him.

New York City.

It was the Big Apple where everything came together. There was the largest trickle of criminals from all over the country.

Then Frank decided it was time to go back to where he grew up.

The town hadn't changed much. Only, in Castle's opinion, it had become dirtier.

For two months, the Punisher gathered information. The Marine had learned everything he could about the local bigwigs: Kingpin, Tombstone, Shieldbearer and the like.

Frank had started small, destroying drug dealers' outlets, and, unlike the local "heroes" he had also learnt about, the Punisher had followed through.

During the last sortie, one of the young recruits had given Frank information about an impending arms shipment to Kingpin, the largest in recent memory. The lad thought that Castle, who had received useful information, would let him go. Well, another lesson for the criminal scum.

The Punisher spares no-one.

Frank's been preparing for this operation for the last week. Every night he'd come to the docks and watch, trying to note every detail: the number of entrances, the location of the containers, the possible movement of bandit patrols. Everything.

By day X, the Punisher was ready. Gathering the bare essentials, Castle approached the West Run in his truck. According to Frank's intelligence, this was supposed to be the quietest area with the fewest soldiers.

And so it turned out to be.

The Punisher began the operation. Once through, he snapped the neck of the first soldier who stopped at the gate. Climbing onto the container, he slit the throat of another criminal. Unholstering his silenced rifle, the ex-military man got down on one knee and methodically fired as he exhaled, blasting the criminals in the head.

Finished with the West Precinct Frank prepared to move deeper into the area as he saw an electrical flash spreading from the warehouse.

"What the hell?!"

With those thoughts, Castle climbed onto a construction crane and, taking aim with his sniper, watched the unfolding action through the scope.

"Heroes.

These dressed-up idiots seem to have also learnt of the impending weapons shipment.

To the dudes' credit, Castle appreciated their tactics. Clean, fast. Everything was working and the suits were closing in on the criminals, but then cars began to leave the warehouse, Frank determined that they were definitely carrying some of the weapons.

The heroes, having also determined this, followed the trucks. Only one of them was left to deal with the criminals. The costume was not familiar, but judging by the method of combat and webbing, it was the same Spider-Man.

While the stripped man dealt with the criminals, Frank decided to move closer to the main target.

After overcoming the path and coming out from behind the container, Castle saw that Spider was gone and the criminals were tied up, overcoming the desire to finish the job, the Punisher approached the warehouse, going to go in.

Just in case, the Marine double-checked the pistols tucked behind his belt.

***

Ibid.

Spider-Man.

Turning around, I froze.

There was a man standing in the sprawling doorway, black hair, dark eyes, military build, and a stern, stubbled face. On his feet were black military boots, military trousers and a dark cloak. A sniper rifle was slung over his shoulder, and a scabbard was strapped to his hip.

But, of course, it was the T-shirt with the white skull on the chest that got all the attention.

Frank Castle.

The Punisher.

- What are you doing? - he questioned me sternly.

- Ahem," I cleared my throat, "I'm stopping an arms shipment altogether. And you're, let me guess, Skull? Frontal bone? A.K.A. Bonehead, right?

Humour is the best remedy for stressful situations. At least that's what a psychiatrist would tell me.

Frank ignored my barb and approached the three criminals I'd tied up.

- No, actually, you're not being serious," Castle said, "let me help you correct a mistake.

The Punisher drew his pistol and fired several times at the two incapacitated bandits.

He's about to shoot the third one as well, but I fire a web, taking away his 9mm Browning M1935.

- What the fuck are you doing?! - I approach Castle and grab him by the shirt.

In response, the Executioner only pulls my hand away from his.

- You and your friends," the man begins with a touch of contempt, "you're prone to half measures, sparing these scum, thinking you're acting like heroes, but in reality you're encouraging crime.

- Oh, so it's better to kill gangsters in cold blood when they've been neutralised?!

- It's war, kid, it's either us or them, you and the other suits need to understand that," the Punisher says with conviction.

This is the first time I've crossed paths with Frank in this life, but in the past I've always wanted to talk to him, to find out why he's like this, because, unlike Red Hood, he has no brakes at all, and the same principle - to kill.

I haven't beaten him up so far only because of respect for his loss, the knowledge that he never hurts innocent people, and a drop of banal curiosity.

- Do you think we should kill every car thief or robber we come across? - I'm starting a discussion. - There are rules, basic humanity.

- You think arresting a pickpocket gives him a chance to reform? No, you're just leaving an unstable criminal element behind. Prisons don't reform. Next time he'll pick up a gun, rob a shop and kill someone for sure, by denying him that opportunity you'll save an innocent life," Frank replied, "and what rules are you talking about, the Legal System? The courts? Wake up kid, they don't work! - Castle finally said in a raspy voice.

- Not all people are like that. You yourself say the system doesn't work, and it's not just Justice. The economy, working conditions, it's all fucked up! A lot of those people who live in poor neighbourhoods are just forced into crime to survive, and often they don't care about themselves so much as their families," I know what I'm talking about because I've witnessed it more than once. - I and the other heroes show that there is a better way, and that they can be better themselves first and foremost," I say with conviction, "but what do you show by ruthlessly exterminating people?

- While you're fighting the symptoms, I'm treating the disease. Yes, I agree, what you're talking about exists, too, but tell me, how scary are the things you've seen?

- What do you mean? - I'm confused.

- How deep into the abyss have you looked? Hardly deep enough to be so idealistic," Castle said condescendingly.

- Be careful, I've dealt with a lot of shit, too: drug dealers, rapists, maniacs, so don't lecture me.

- Yeah, it's a weighty list, but you haven't seen the real evil," Frank says when he's convinced. - Like I said, you and the rest of us are stuck in a routine with street thugs, arms dealers, or," he looks over my shoulder, "these 'supervillains'. I bet behind that mask you're just a young man, pretending to be a regular civilian most of the day and preferring to turn a blind eye to problems. Meanwhile, people continue to die.

- You can't save everyone! - and maybe you wouldn't be a deranged lunatic if you tried to live like a normal person too.

- Sometimes there's no turning back, kid," the Punisher said tiredly, "but I'm willing to give you a chance.

- What do you mean?

- You have the voice of a man who has experienced loss, and believe me I know it, but I still don't agree with you, so let's say I don't kill any of them," Castle said with his hands spread, "and you let me go.

- And why would I do that? - for all the understanding of the Punisher's tragedy, he's a criminal-killing, PTSD-addicted professional soldier.

A potent mix that could endanger innocents. What if he's crazy enough to pick a fight with gangsters in the middle of a busy neighbourhood?

- You know Stilwell Street in East Brooklyn?

- I have a rough idea of where it is, but I'm a Centre and Queens guy, I'm not in the rest of New York as much.

- I'll meet you there in a fortnight, then we'll see how strong your moral fibre is, or did you get cold feet?

I've been thinking.

On the one hand, it's dangerous, maybe it's a trap. On the other hand, I don't feel a trick, and my gut doesn't tell me anything.

Either way, I can disarm Castle there, if the threat is real. There's no point in arresting him anyway. He's the kind of guy who's already made up his mind. We can't let this opportunity to help people go to waste.

- On one condition, I'm not agreeing to a massacre. If this is a dive you're just trying to clean up, I'll stop you.

- Believe me, there will be innocent victims there who need help," Frank said with conviction.

- Okay," I nod, "did you kill anyone else?

- On the west side, eight or ten bandits," Castle said calmly.

- God," I rub my face tiredly, "do you have any idea how it's gonna look when I call the police?!

- As a gesture of goodwill, I'm prepared to dispose of the bodies.

Frank seems to understand my apprehension at the police reaction. Hasn't he already encountered law enforcement backlash? Although I'm surprised he cares.

- All right. (chuckles)

After picking up the webbed bodies, the Punisher left the room.

*

Half an hour later, Frank finished and drove off in his van full of dead criminals.

I watched from afar as I climbed to the roof of the warehouse and, frankly, regretted my decision. I'd stumbled across dead men before, but these...Castle was a true Executioner, methodical, ruthless. And he shot for sure. And when you consider he's got ten lives on his hands.... and that's just today.

I let him go, though.

I'm not without sin.

I may not have killed anyone yet, but God knows I wanted to. And I'd crossed the line a long time ago, and I was hardly as bad as Frank. Don't forget who I got the information from about today's deal.

We all have our own demons to fight. I'm not gonna teach the Punisher about life, but if he makes innocent people get hurt, I'll stop him.

I went down to the warehouse.

After making sure there was nothing left that could compromise me and the other heroes, I called the police.

Within twenty minutes, the harbour was flooded with crews of boys in blue.

At the head, as was always the case when the call came from me, came George Stacey.

- Good evening, Captain," I shook the officer's hand.

- Hey, Spider, you didn't waste any time, did you? - George is alluding to the wrecked warehouse and the downed bandits.

- Yeah, we did a pretty good job.

- "We?"

- It wasn't a job for just one," I shoot the thread into the jumble of containers, "Have a good night, Captain.

- Nice costume," Stacy said as Spider flew away.

*

An hour later.

Hell's Kitchen Warehouse.

 Landing on the roof of the place where we were meeting the team.

- We've been waiting for you," Luke said tiredly but contentedly.

- Did you catch up with the lorries?

- Yeah, and we got the cops," Jess said, more relaxed.

- Cool.

- Did you call the police, is everything okay? - Matt asked.

- Yeah, they're here, so the guns will be off the streets.

- What took you so long? - Danny asks.

I tensed up a little.

It feels wrong not to tell them about Frank, but I can't give up Castle. We have a kind of gentleman's agreement, and Murdoch's about as intrusive as...well, a lawyer.

- It took the cops a long time to get here," I shrug lightly. - Let's talk about this. WE DID IT, PEOPLE! - I shout loud enough to make Jones cringe, "That's awesome!

- Yeah, I agree," Rand nods.

- I have to admit, it wasn't bad," the brunette shares her opinion.

- We make a good team," agreed Daredevil.

- Maybe we should call ourselves something. - Cage suggested.

- Oh, we could," I move my hands in a sign-off gesture, "The Defenders, what do you think?

The heroes look at each other.

- Pretentious.

- Stupid, don't you think?

- Isn't that the name of the band?

- It doesn't sound like much.

- Can you think of a better one? - I frown.

After five minutes of silence and zero guesses.

- The Defenders it is.

- Okay," all four of us agree brokenly.

- Amazing unanimity, - I comment snidely, - good spirit, team. Okay, well done, goodbye, everyone!

Shooting out a web, I fly home.