Chapter 8: Saddam Wins The News
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"Morals sold to Middle Eastern Dictator for 30 barrels of oil
On Tuesday the Senate approved the controversial US-Iraq Petroleum Act colloquially known as SaddamCash. Supporters of the Act have lauded the Carter Administration for striking the deal which they consider an economic miracle. The deal involves Iraq charging America just ten dollars a barrel for four million barrels a day over the next ten years. In the current climate of sharply rising oil prices and geopolitical uncertainty, supporters claim that the deal ensures America's economic success for the entire decade.
Opponents of the deal have decried the moral and financial aspect of putting one hundred and forty billion dollars into the hands of a Middle Eastern dictator going against America's democratic principles. They also argue that the new T Bonds that the Federal Government will issue Iraq as compensation will erase all the disinflationary benefits of the oil deal.
Markets responded ecstatically to the deal with the Dow Jones up 5% in the morning session alone. Further bullish movement is expected before profit taking."
- Wall Street Journal
"The End For Iraq's Shias and Kurds?
Americas brand spanking new trade deal with Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein is being seen as a cold hearted betrayal of America's traditional Kurdish allies in the region. Some Left leaning commentators have termed the deal akin to Americas actions in the Fall of Saigon.
Brookings Institute believes that there is a high chance that Saddam Hussein will use the money to brutally suppress the Kurdish and Shia populations of the country.
Saddam Hussein is of course a part of the minority Sunni community of Iraq. He came to power after usurping the position of his mentor and purging his Ba'ath part of 'alleged' detractors.
Read more on page 9"
- New York Times
"The End of Rule Brittania
Reader, the new trade deal that America has signed with Iraq under everyone's noses has immediately deflated the grandiose promises of our new Prime Minister who so eloquently promised the return of Britain to the centre stage.
Not too many decades ago, Britain had dual control over Iran's oil industry and now we are relegated to also rans who will need to accept OPECs set price like every other punter.
One wonders whether all the posh and highly educated new Ministers even had an inkling that our cousins across the pond were lining up such a tasty deal that all but guarantees America's return to economic shithousery. The bugle has truly sounded on the British Empire."
- The Times, op ed
"OPEC Accuses Saddam of Treachery
Today Saudi Minister of Petroleum and senior figure in OPEC, Mr. Ahmed Yamani accused Iraqi President Saddam Hussein of betraying the very organization that Iraq helped set up.
He denounced Iraqs action of negotiating a separate deal with America as an action that would bring his fellow Arab countries to their knees as he forecast an oil price war as OPEC members would seek panic deals of their own.
The Minister stopped short of denouncing long time Saudi ally America but sources have suggested that the American Ambassador to the Arabian Kingdom was summoned by Jeddah for an explanation."
- Reuters
"One Mad Dictator Calls Another Dictator Sataness
After Iraqi Dictator Saddam Husseins megabucks deal with America for its oil, his neighbouring crazy Ayatollah Khomenei newly installed in Iran denounced Hussein as a she-Satan for getting into bed with the Great Satan America.
We doubt Saddam cares very much as he rolls around in his castle full of greenbacks. The Iraqi dictator is notoriously fond of fine scotch whiskey and cigars. Maybe its time to invest that money in Glenfiddich stock?"
- The Sun
I'm rich byaaatch!