Hentai Shinobi Rule 30: It's always the silent ones.
***
January 25th, Wetday.
Today was a special day. Kai shot out from his meditative posture and aimed to dress his best. Despite sleeping for two hours in that position—done more so out of boredom—since his [Sleepless Gamer] Sub-Trait and [Overdrive] unique skill guaranteed virtually unending stamina, Kai didn't need to roll around in the bed and moan about leaving its comfort after another five minutes. Such a day might grace his life. The future was unpredictable, after all—however, not today.
Kai gave himself another look. Like usual, his training undershirt barely peeked from the v-necked blue t-shirt visible through the unzipped tanned jacket. The boy tried styling his hair before ignoring the issue. It wasn't like Kai was suffering from bed hair. So, he wore a slightly loose-fitted trouser and affirmed his modest looks. He'd also grown slightly taller over the past weeks.
Kai could examine all of it later.
Today was a rare break—no missions, grind, and heaven-blessed Genins to set straight.
It was Minato's birthday!
Kai had expectations.
He only expected one thing—fun.
"Yo, good morning~!" Kai greeted Kushina with a toothy grin as she leaned forward with practiced ease, prompting the former to peck her pretty forehead. The boy was more than willing to accommodate Kushina's desire since the girl had been a solid constant in his new life.
"Yep! Good morning, dattebane!" Kushina cheered. She had other reasons to feel glad. For one, she didn't have any missions today.
Kai was a grind freak, forcing his team to pick their slack or get left behind. Despite Kushina's and Mikoto's perseverance, the girls eagerly welcomed the break. Completing two D-rank missions a day was no mean feat, and they felt they deserved this rest.
So, for once, Kushina didn't feel annoyed at Minato for being the source of Kai's elation.
"Where are you going?" Kai questioned as Kushina turned on her heels after greeting him.
"Sleeping," Kushina replied with a yawn as she scratched her head, her long red hair disheveled and tangled into a strangely cute messy nest.
"What about the party?" Kai followed after Kushina as she shook her head. "Not going. I'm just going to curl in my blanket, dattebane."
"Oh…"
Kai's disappointment wasn't evident in his tone. He had looked forward to hanging out with Kushina and Mikoto after Minato's celebration. However, the D-rank missions didn't beguile Kai enough not to have him notice Kushina's and Mikoto's accumulated weariness. So, he made an educated guess.
"Mikoto isn't coming either, is she?"
Kushina shook her head before offering a tired smile.
"Sorry, Kai-chan. We just wanted to rest."
"Huh? Oh, yeah." The boy nodded before grinning. "No need to be sorry. We'll just hang out another time."
Kushina visibly brightened before grinning. "Yep. Lunch will be on me that day."
"Ichiraku Ramen?" Kai guessed. That was the only place where Kushina could act like a freaking Daimyo.
"Ichiraku Ramen!" The redhead giggled. Poor Teuchi.
"Well, have a good rest."
Kai snickered as he heard Kushina calling out.
"Don't do something stupid with Minato, and be safe!" Kushina asserted as worry laced her voice.
A weird request, Kai noticed. Still, he nodded and turned on his heels before greeting Mito and leaving the premises.
<<<>>>
Ninja Tools Roll.
Kai observed the modest brown building bereft of any unique decorations that should have been the attraction to gather clientele. He entered the shop as the moving door tweaked the bell attached with a string to jingle a soft welcome.
"Ah, Kai-san?"
There it was—the respect. If Kushina and Mikoto knew how to violate Kai's soul, Minato knew how to heal the boy. Of course, the top spot for healing belonged to Tsunade. Kai's sensei had a generous heart and a grander bust, making the former point irrelevant.
"Yo!" Kai greeted with a short salute. "Happy Birthday, Minato!" The boy briefly met the blonde's striking blue eyes before looking around to observe the spectacular roster of weapons, from axes, spears, swords, fans, and bows to based shit—like clubs! Kai could only fantasize about the power move—bashing the opponent with a club!
"I hoped we could spend some time together," Kai began. "It's my birthday gift to you! My presence!"
Kai jutted his chest with a proud smirk as he observed the barest of twitches near Minato's lips.
"Nah, I'm just messing around. Here." Kai stepped forward and fished something from the pouch strapped on his right thigh. "I started training the senbon. Thanks for that. I hope you spend less time mastering it."
Minato looked at the palm-sized scroll with disbelief in his eyes. He swiftly ushered Kai behind the counter and had him sit on the spare stool.
"Is this," Minato gulped. "Are you gifting me a fuinjutsu?"
"Have you learned how to draw explosive tags?" Kai questioned with a tilt as Minato shook his head. Kai brightened in response. "Good." He pointed at the scroll and spoke with a mixture of glee and sincere encouragement. "I spent the entire night writing all I knew about the explosive tags and every possible mistake I learned to avoid. It even has the correct strokes for symbols and characters, so the seal doesn't wimp out on you."
Minato appeared emotional as he clutched the scroll tightly.
"Kai-san… it's an incredibly thoughtful gift. I would have cleared my schedule with Tonton-san had I known about your arrival. It tends to get boring in here." The blue-eyed boy dipped his head in guilt as Kai shrugged.
"Are you kidding me?" The boy giggled. "It's only boring if you don't understand how valuable peace and quiet is. I'm happy to hang out with you without needing to assist Konoha by disciplining some Uchiha runt off his leash."
Minato would have sweated at the implications of Kai's words if not for feeling touched by the boy's sincerity.
So, they stayed and chatted as Minato revealed to Kai about the shop's owner.
Tonton was visiting his son Tintin since the latter caught some sickness. The hospital would discharge Tonton's son in a few days, and the man left the shop in Minato's care during the morning. After some time, Kai had the pleasure of meeting Tonton. The brown-haired, somewhat wheat-skinned man boasted a thick beard as he welcomed Kai into the shop and began chatting about his weapon preferences.
The answer was Senbon.
Despite Kai's determination to master every weapon only to have the necessary knowledge about what his opponents can potentially use, Kai loved using senbons. They were discreet and deadly. Kai could effortlessly snipe someone's eye, nostril, and asshole simultaneously! He couldn't help but love it.
To Minato's surprise and relief, Kai was pleasant around Tonton. After all, Minato knew his employer was an orphan. Yet, the blonde missed the point.
Kai disciplined the kids because he could mold them into becoming upstanding citizens. Tonton already checked such boxes. Why would Kai waste his energy fixing something where nothing was wrong?
Yet, the two boys had the rest of the day to have fun, and fate shined on Kai when a boisterous whitehead appeared to be waiting for the duo not far from the weapon shop, peering into someone's house with a monocular! Needless to say, it felt important. So, Kai transformed a kunai into a monocular of the same make and gazed in the same direction as Jiraiya.
"Woah!" Kai gasped. "Check it out, Minato! It's a couple doing it against their window's ledge."
The boy handed the monocular to the birthday boy as Minato offered a thin smile and shook his head.
"We shouldn't peek," he mustered as Jiraiya looked away from the scope and glanced at Minato with a broad grin.
"It's not peeking, Minato. The Shinobi call it collecting information. You learn about it by practicing in your home."
Kai admired how Jiraiya spun his kinks into world-class excuses as the white-haired Jonin compressed the scope and stuffed it inside his robes. "Happy Birthday, Minato. Come on, I prepared a party for you. Dekai and Hiruna are already waiting."
Jiraiya looked at Kai with a pleased smile. "Join us, Kai." An obscene smirk soon twisted the man's expression. "You should get a taste of harem, hehehe~!"
One boy brightened, and the other's shoulders sagged.
One wanted to enjoy his birthday by delving into seals, while the other wanted to do so by delving into babes Jiraiya rizzed for the group.
<<<>>>
"Why are you here?!" Hiruna fought back a blush while glaring at Kai as the latter rolled his eyes.
"Be careful before I bend you over and discipline you in your parent's stead in front of—" Kai paused as his gaze wandered around one of Red Piped Crab Restaurant's private booths as the dim red and pink light showered over several- six, gorgeous women surrounding Hiruna and Dekai.
"Hello, ladies~!" Jiraiya attracted other's attention as he entered before performing a grand gesture. "I give you—The Birthday Boy!"
The six women's predatory gaze landed on Kai as the boy felt his spine tingle with sheer intrigue and desire. However, he calmly stepped aside, revealing the blonde standing behind him.
Kai observed the women glancing at Jiraiya, who subtly nodded before the six women immediately jumped Minato.
"How cute~!" One of them cooed.
"What a strong Genin-san~! I'm sure you won't hesitate to protect me from bad guys." Another circled her finger against an uncomfortable Minato's chest.
The remaining girls soon replaced their attention on the rest of the guys as two of them sat by Jiraiya's sides. The man sprawled his arms around them and hugged them closer. Meanwhile, the remaining four found a seat next to the boys.
Kai himself was in the presence of a generous brown-haired woman who wore her hair in a loop clipped onto her head. She sported a slightly visible purple eye shadow and curled her lips into an enticing smirk as the body-hugging—almost sparkling—green dress had cut-outs from several spots, allowing Kai a view of her creamy skin and erection-approved cleavage.
She leaned onto Kai, not minding how her warm breasts almost spilled out as she hugged his head into her cleavage.
"You're a cute one, too~!" The woman moaned. "What's your name, dear?"
Kai blinked as his breath muffled into the delicious valley.
"Your mom never told you about my visits?"
His muffled voice was barely a whisper as only the woman hugging Kai heard her. She stiffened, barely keeping the annoyance from betraying her gaze. Instead, she plastered a sickeningly sweet smile.
"How cruel, sweetheart—"
"You better hold yer tongue and call my name with the respect it deserves—" The woman's body froze as she felt a senbon against her neck. "It's Kai, The Great Harem Daddy. Repeat it."
Even though the boy enjoyed her chest, the woman had no delusions about the raw promise behind his words as a bead of sweat trickled down the woman's cheek.
"K-Kai, The Great Harem Daddy!" The woman gasped. Others had already noticed the change as the background moans and coos from the girls faded into shaken silence. She followed the command to a T because this might well be her first time feeling the absolute indifference in the boy's voice. She'd served stronger and better men. Yet, they paled when it came to the threatening presence within the short stack embedded into her body with a surprisingly rock-hard erection touching her squishy belly.
Kai pulled back with a soft smile.
"There you go." He removed the senbon from the woman's neck. "And you are?"
"I'm," the woman swallowed a nervous lump. "Genri."
"Cool," Kai giggled. "I don't want fake services, so refrain from touching me or taking me for a mindless kid like Hiruna. Though, Minato and Dekai are fine. Especially, Dekai." The boy tossed the dark-skinned fatty a sour look and leaned back on the cushion.
"W-what do you mean by that?" Hiruna flustered with a red face.
"Ask your Sensei, kid," Kai replied, pointing his nose up with a haughty look. Instead of waiting for Hiruna's response, Kai offered Jiraiya a disarming smile.
"I'm sorry about that stunt, Jiraiya-san. But I don't really like fake shit. Oh, and when will we have the cake?!"
Kai didn't reveal the other reason.
He allowed others to call him 'Chan' or other cutesy names. It was a privilege. Besides, he'd realized something about his 'friends' and couldn't look away from a few facts. Sure, he'd take his time processing it all—however, Kai was certain he would do so without needing to fall into traps or stranger's coochie. It was simple, really.
Did Kai want Tsuande sniffing 'Strange?'
Did he want his friends to let confusion and moments of vulnerability lead them to commit regrettable mistakes?
No.
So, Kai needed to afford them the same luxuries they afforded him.
Kai wanted a harem, not open a brothel.
Getting laid was never an issue.
Jiraiya scrutinized the boy before laughing. His boisterous laughter melted the tensions within the booth as his hands left the two babes around him.
"Then let's skip to the actual celebration. Thank you for your time, ladies."
They nodded and left after casting cautious glances at Kai.
"Phew," Minato deflated with relief before looking at Kai. "Thank you, Kai-san."
"Don't thank me," Kai shrugged. "I would have liked it more if Jiraiya-san just invited them than paying them to hang out with us."
"Yes, yes," Jiraiya huffed. "Kids and their growing standards! Let me tell you all. I managed to score a babe when I was your age. She was a widow and truly amazing!" Dekai and Hiruna grew engrossed when Kai hummed.
"Didn't she try to kill you?"
Jiraiya blinked.
"Tsunade told you?" The man laughed. "Well, yeah. She tried to kill me in my sleep. But I'll tell you kids one thing—try having crazy at least once. It'll broaden your horizons."
Kai reverently made a mental note.
"Hey!" Hiruna suddenly looked at Kai. The Uchiha's glare sharpened. "How dare you look down on me?! I'm just as much of a man as Dekai and Minato. Just wait till I awaken my Sharingan. Then Mikoto will see who the better man is."
"Dude," Kai rolled his eyes. "I meant Dekai's already doing Yuna. And it was Minato's birthday, so everyone should rub their tits on his face once at least."
Team 6 froze.
"That's my boy!" Jiraiya cheered for Dekai.
"Y-you and Yuna?" Hiruna blinked owlishly. "How? I thought she hated your bloated guts."
"Dunno," Dekai blushed at the attention. "It just happened. She said something about punching or ignoring someone as a girl's flirting method. Wait. How did you know?"
"Oh," Kai shrugged. "Saw you getting into the bushes with Yuna at the end of the festival."
"Teach me your ways," Hiruna dipped his head as Dekai blinked.
"Uh, get fat like me and sport a buzz cut?"
Hiruna pulled back with a disgusted expression. Still, Kai noticed Minato brightening up and smiled. He could never understand why Minato wouldn't want to stick his head into free tits. Kai's best guess was that Minato was too shy.
"Well! Let's start with the cake!" Jiraiya slapped the table and conjured the cake from Rikudo knows where.
However, Jiraiya's commissioned cakes were top-tier.
<<<>>>
Tsunade held her childish giggle when she sensed Kai entering the Uzumaki Residence. She'd been waiting with the guise of wanting to meet Mito and spend some quality time with her grandmother. She excused herself from the room and interjected Kai's path with a comforting smile.
"Oh, you're back," Tsunade acted surprised. "How was your break?"
Surprised by her presence, Tsunade watched Kai regain his bearings as he nodded.
"It was fun," he answered with a smile. "Jiraiya-san always knows how to brighten any celebration!"
Jiraiya was there? Tsunade instantly grew guarded and picked on his words.
"What did that man do now?"
Kai cocked his head in response. "Well, he took us to Red Piped Crab Restaurant—"
'I'm going to kill him.'
"—where he had their service staff waiting on us."
'No. I'll grate his dick.' Tsunade had no issue treating Kai as an adult but took offense at Jiraiya's similar approach. The one thing Tsunade, or others in Kai's life, did not want him to get hooked on was such services.
"Then I scared the one appointed for me."
Tsunade paused at the revelation and waited.
"I know it would have been expensive, so I tried paying for it. After all, the rest of the party was great, even when Hiruna was in it."
She observed Kai exhale before shaking her head.
"Jiraiya doesn't care about money. He's more loaded than he lets on," Tsunade reached out to ruffle Kai's hair—that's how she treated short kings in her life. "We'll discuss it later. But let me reward you for being so good."
She noticed Kai's gaze twinkle with illicit ideas and still managed to surpass his expectations when she leaned down and whispered the magical phrase into his ears—Don't you want to know what animal appendages Grandma would love to see on you?
Tsunade felt Kai's skyrocketed heartbeat, leading the boy to Mito's room.
The vain gambling addict couldn't help but imagine the look on Kai's and Mito's faces. Yet, she also ignored the surprisingly obscene look threatening to betray Kai's gaze.
Everything transpired as Tsunade planned. She wouldn't have acted so childishly before. However, Mito had been acting a little weird and distant for a while. Not to mention, the Uzumaki Lady told her granddaughter that she tweaked her will and added something else for Tsunade.
The news almost scared Tsunade.
Despite everything and understanding of their way, Tsunade was unwilling to lose her grandmother. Yet, she couldn't cure death. Thus, she retired to the next best thing—forming as many memories as possible.
So, it was cathartic for Tsunade to watch Kai reveal his creation to the unknowing woman as a plume of smoke covered the eager Kai, who must also have been willing to cheer Mito up through her recent mood.
Tsunade fought back the urge to grab and pet the fluffiest red fox ears and tail. The woman couldn't help but imagine her team in different animal wear.
<<<>>>
*Poof*
Aware of Tsunade's impish glee and Kai's sincere emotion to cheer her up, Mito watched with a curtain of kindness hiding her amused gaze. The plume of smoke thinned and dissipated into the room's surroundings when she felt a fraction of unbridled rage enter her system.
"LET ME OUT! I won't massacre the village. Just the BOY! How dare he?! HOW DARE HE DESECRATE A FOX'S FEATURE?" The loud, apocalyptic roar resounding in Mito's senses questioned. "First, he perverted these noble features on your weary cunt face! Now, this?! AAAGGHHHHHH!"
The being rage quitted, unable to express its genuine despair as Mito watched Kai appearing vulnerable. His somewhat narrow eyes glinted with equal parts of nervousness and heavy, depraved desires.
Kai believed Mito didn't know.
She knew.
Mito knew Kai had picked this specific red for the ears and tails that matched his special Foxy Mito Onahole. The woman suspected Kai would be rocking the hardest of boners had she been a few years younger—or if she hadn't been such a crucial pillar in Kai's life.
She watched his floofy tail nervously swish while Tsunade held back the urge to laugh.
Mito could imagine the boy in fox ears and tail rutting his thick, veiny shaft into his hand against her face till he painted her face with his seed. He would then rub his twitching cockhead against her nostrils and lips, forcing her to inhale his undoubtedly heavy musk. Kai would press his cock against her cheeks and forehead, working his way to drown Mito in his filling seed till her lower lips ached and her wombed dropped with needy, ready-to-be-fertilized eggs. He'd tear her clothes away and stick his fat—
Mito exhaled and regathered her bearings. She swallowed a lump as nervous as the one forming in Kai's throat at her quiet examination.
She needed to do something about her recent 'daze.'
Mito could not help but find such imaginations overlap more frequently with Kai. When he cooked, she thought of him cumming into a big bowl and forcing her to chug it all down, making her throat and stomach his sticky mess.
When Kai exercised in the backyard, Mito fantasized about the boy strapping her with exposing latex and a tight, hurting collar around her neck as he trained by pumping all his frustrations into her soppy quim.
And when he looked so nervous, she expected the boy to revert to his usual confidence, climb on the bed, whip out his fat, veiny cock, and do the most shameful things to her rejuvenated body in front of her naughty granddaughter—
'Again.' Mito grew alert. She needed to do something about it.
Still, the woman exhaled the pent-up sigh and plastered a gentle smile on her face.
"Come here, dear."
Her core throbbed when she regarded Kai with such intimacy. She prayed her needs did not slip into her tone as the boy stepped forward before Mito reached out and gently touched his ear.
"It's a marvelous jutsu," Mito praised, and something dark and depraved overtook her, prompting her to tease the boy.
"Do you think fox ears would look good on me?"
Her eyes squinted as she caught a slight twitch against Kai's trousers. The boy dipped his head and nodded.
"It would, Mito-sama."
His words pleased Mito more than she could have cared to admit.
<<<>>>
'What just happened?' Tsunade watched everything fall apart as Mito played with Kai's ears before dismissing him.
She felt blue-balled!
***
Alternate Title: Rise and Shine; A Good Day; Unending Stamina; Calling Others Friends And Acting Like Married Couples; Kushina and Mikoto's Rest; Tired and Worn; Specially Waking Up To Get Her Morning Kiss; Kushina Picks Up The Wifey Role; Minato's Part-Time Job; Minato's Grinding Genin Work AND Juggling Other Jobs; The Party Maker; Finding Information; Spy Work; Practice Makes Perfect; Peeping Toms; Public Indecency; Kai: Jiraiya's Rizz Is Unmatched *Jiraiya's Rizz: Money*; Kai Ain't For The Hoes Unless She's Named Tsunade; Hoe Party; Uchiha's Catching Strays; Tonton, Tintin, and Tenten?; The Best Gift: Kai; Kushina Wants An Advanced Gift; So Does Mikoto; Hoes Really Judged The Book Named Kai Based On The Exterior; Cute? Your Mom; Kai Pulled Your Mom; Bene Gesserit's New Prospect; Only Kai Offers Smushing Privileges; Kai's Too Fabulous For Plebs; Awesome Cake; Jiraiya Really Gave Minato a Bachelor's Party; Kai Also Wants To Learn Dekai's Ways; The Prank?; Tsunade's Luck Sucks; Tsunade Can Learn a Few Things From Her Luck; Catching Kai Off-Guard; Pleased Tsunade; Tsunade: Only I Stuff Kai Into My Chest, Not Other Hussies; Tsunade About To Serve Orochimaru Jiraiya's Shreds; Tsunade Surpassed Kai's Expectations; The Only One Who Didn't Know Anything Was Tsunade; Kai: Hot Fuck! Mito Doesn't Know. That's Good *Meanwhile, Mito In Her Fantasies: Kai Doesn't Know I Know. That's Good*; Kai Shippuden: Love Is War; Joey Tribbiani Is CONFUSED; Kurama Really Rage Quitted; Kai and Mito BOTH Want To Be In Fox Outfits And Rut Like One; Mito Must Do Something