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Rambling and Random bullshittery

This be your most daring story; A rambling if you must, Of language most foul, of unexplored ways to curse. Of bullshit in every turn, in every twist, in every twists of tongues. As told by thine ol'hands and masterminded by the crude tongue, with all my tics and antics. Do-told tale of a vegetable who limbs and stumbled on a new realm of where creation was pierced in it's boundaries. Of a connoisseur who learns of ways of an unshackled breathing body, the occasional doggie styles and the utmost high of all forms of unequaled shag-getry, wooing tarts and thots and hoes, all manners of terms modern and old to name all wenches of all- the ripened titties; "Thine taste ranges from nymphs of florescent pure to flooded lips which hangs and are forgivably bonk-able with a passing thought riled up by the hard down under, Which in short means all!" Heinously wholesome in ways of the vile tongue which grew most crude, terribly heinous with every breaths more lived- after to after and then more, much much more. A rambling- to what he sees, to what he does. This is a story of a living, in a world of pixels; of new universe where a man could swim in lava, a world where such and such is deemed mundane. An epic where a naked fledgling dove in the heat of an avian war, baby-steps towards a destiny-, etched in the root webs of two worlds with only a goal; To be the Pirate Ki- nevermind! To live most free. Rejuvenation; maketh man a new being, now what would be his tale when all he knew of living was blinking a set of dead little eyes, what would such a virgin of a human ways do in a surreal world that explodes magics and bullshits. I'll tell ye all! Just listen to the ramble. (Stay with me, I won't ever drop this.) [Warning:] 1. Not for the faint of heart. 1½. Smut will be there but it will be extremely rare. 2. The english dictionary would require a thorough update after I'm done with this epic. 3. Fuckery most heinous most foul. (By decree of a certain fool) 4. Don't tell your mums you learnt (curses) from me. 5. No other warning just enjoy, If ye dares. Cover art not mine, thank you for letting me use it and sorry but pray tell if you ordered it removed. Will use it until I could afford a more authentic cover art or until boss wants it removed.

JF_Fanai · Fantasie
Zu wenig Bewertungen
32 Chs

To melt a snow

Highland Mustangs- Large, great running beasts, near in double the size of regular horses they were, "Double sized horses!" I gasped in their beauty, shiny and silky their hair, muscular thighs flexed with every movement, their prideful eyes knew they were majestic.

A single one could easily pull a ton of weight, be it with the help of wheels or not.

"I heard these guys are the fastest land animal here!" Rip tried his best on the details, spilling everything he had known.

We had booked a cart pulled by one of the beasts, a wooden cart with curiously cushioned seats and on and about we rode a rather smooth ride.

We were told the wheels was upgraded by installing sun dried saps of Pale-leaved Sunder-Rubber trees, acting as what we in the real world called springs.

There was some taboo in this world, need not knew what but there were, twas avoiding spoilers and I guess one of them had something to do with halting civilization's development in molding metal but twas just a guess, I could read them later.

We rode on up the sloping road, higher now from ground, Rip pointed at the curious machine laced with purple mana or energy, "See the elevator, a jacked up magical elevator thingie, for up and down the bish took like ten-ish?! Seconds.. very neat!"

"Wow! What's that purple thing though? Seen a few that purples like that, why do the purples purple?"

"I don't know.. something just purpling I guess."

'He said purpling.' I was proud in the mind, twas not only me who bend words, another ally of the gremlin-tongued, "Yea! So that it purples.." I added a purple line.

"Purples..." He nodded.

"Purpling." I nodded along.

A while went, the air then chilled near to cold way on high, we were close to the hole.

The hole- The cave through the hill grew more, twas now with gargantuan spikes on all sides and throughout.

A massive hole, like a gigantic giant's bigger and stupendously larger elder brother's one-hell-of-a-gaping mouth with tall fucking spikes of hard black rocks for teeth, where in the cracks of the spikes water flow through and mate just right before birthing the waterfall or like that giant-cunt's mouth drooling.

"How's the view?" asked Rip.

Twas turning the charred broccoli back, gazing at the hole I were, "Fucking amazing!! So it was already there before people moved here?"

"That's what I heard." He answers, never short a supply of details- enthusiastically hyper for the things he knew and to the things he didn't he simply answers with still a hyper flair.

"Oh! You're in luck." Rip hollered at me, kicking my seat for my attention.

"Sup?" pushing the chin up, telling him what.

"Look! That's them!" excited he beckoned me a glance towards the front where I saw people with capes, dark red on the inside and black in the out- riding on top a plethora of beasts as mounts, some were same as this muscular mustangs, a turtle rabbit looking thing and one- as the mind guessed, 'What the fuck is that stupid thing?' and then many more.

"Uhh! Their cool and all but who's them?" I asked, never too shy to ask, Rip knew I was unknowing to all of them lot.

"Shit bro! You didn't even read forums?"

"Mm-Mmh!" I shook the broccoli.

"Ha-hah! It's cool.. I kinda like your moxy tho , it speaks big dick energy!" he said, "When the server went down someone posted a thread in the forums, posting a rather proved video of The Grail and you know how hard Muller said it was in getting the thing right?"

I nodded.

"Yeah! So before the lawyer played the video people started making Guilds like in the game and that cape means that they call themselves Guild Terra-Stars, they're like one of the sweetest guilds who took many strong fuckers in… you know and I'm guessing people like you bro."

The march of this new guild was making way to the check gate and down the forest, we hath already cross paths with the leads, they were rather a mighty bunch, all sorts of differences they donned- attracting the eye, some even looked like monkeys, and a curious one amongst and one who took the lead was a serene nature mating dude with a dear rear end and legs, he looked nature blessed with green hair and flowers blooming on them.

"People get along so fast.." I commented on the horde of players, "Could I also do that?" carefully silent and frail to even squeak- I muttered.

"Yo! Ya better stop that mumbling cause we about to get our jaws dropped!" excited- Rip nearly jumped, slapping me tons at the back of the palm.

"What-What-What?" I matched his enthusiasm, when I turned his jaws were already hanging.

With not a word but starry eyes, "Don't be too obvious but look!" his tongue was muttering slow a sound.

Amidst the hordes of players that still came marching down, on top a white highland stallion with roses braided on it's mane- Rip fawned over this blonde haired chick, a high-tied ponytail with sharp a marbled nose.

His eyes of crimson red spoke his heart's secret, twas clear he was begging for the shagging.

I had not any words to speak- to hopefully ease his throbbing heart, nor ways of the tongue to push him off of his hesitation so he could make the move he Oh so wishes, I could tell he yearned for her, his eyes spoke a poem of a star struck lover's endeavour.

The tongue only knew how to savagely shag or bonk a ripened twat whence met in the same night, love and their ways twas far from the ways of this vile tongue.

The lady had not donned a cape but the dude of silver hair besides her seemed to try and work his pitiful charm to the heart of my friend Rip's to-be girlfriend.

Twas soundly clear, with the cape of the Terra-Stars he donned and his ever so consistent turn to the girl, he was with goals to recruit or more likely his eyes of silver too- were set on trying to get into her pants.

They came closer as we climbed higher, the steeds, the mounts, their parade thumped in the barren road.

I took time to peak at Rip, he blinked not, not since she hath came.

His starry eyes like glue they already stuck, his neck turning with the eye's demand as we crossed each other.

"If that ain't love I don't know what is." Said I.

Rip was a sore thumb- standing a sunflower who was diligently facing his sun , he could not resist to act as such, it was love's call and this proved to I that no man could heed-not the call.

Twas only and more learning of the human ways.

Then; In a split moment, I saw maybe Rip too- The girl, the lady, his queen, his beloved shared him a rather heart fluttering glance.

They shared a short electricity when they met their eyes and the dame swiftly turned a sweet quick cheek back to the road.

Mom said girls fiddled their hair over their ears when they had the butterflies.

And the lady did as such-

"Oh! The tell!" I yelped out, tugging Rip by the arm, "It's the tell!" I reckoned.

I might've been loud, I invoked a bothersome brow, slanting from the side of the lady, the silvered prick was on kill mode.

"Fuck you lookin at boi!" Rip was quick to be explosive, he was a damn fucking man.

"Why's a worm cursing at me for?" fucked his prick tongue back to Rip- that silvered prick.

The silver prick pulled the reins of his mount to a halt- riding a stallion of white, he and whites and silvers, he has that deity-superiority complex.

And as he did a bunch of goons behind him followed his lead.

"Ohhh!" I slurred and stood my tall feet next to Rip, to show twas ready for any, my afro senses the turmoil that were about to come, the thrill of a battle- I hath now been addicted to it unbeknownst but the heart thirst for the thrill of it.

The lady then halted her stallion a little more pasts the commotion, neighing when it does, attracting the heads of the others who had rode past us.

With cheeky a lined smile I stood, "I got your back bro!" I held a palm at his shoulder.

"It seems two short stuffs together don't make a tall person!" the prick smirked on top his horse- some fuck faces behind him were having a blast- laughing at us.

T'we were unfazed in face of multitudes, we were daredevils- we pushed on the beef further.

And in battle of tongues, thine could not have been more yearning to be vile and cruel and sharp with the most cunning of wit.

"Yea! But having silver hair and putting on mismatched whites don't exactly make you angelicaly handsome!" I chortled, with wider a smirk which curved to execrate the prick.

"Ah! So he was trying to cosplay as the Deity-King!" Rip caught on with the same fucking smirk as me own.

We were as they claimed, shared the same brain cell.

"He?" I asked, playing a fool- dropping the smirk for an oblivious act of drama on thine beautiful face- shitting doubt on his manhood.

"Barely!" and Rip played on the joke.

"Silence!" barked the prick.

He was mad, veins rooted on his forehead.

We could hear little chuckles coming from the lady who was just past us.

Rip's attention was immediately turned, I turned my head just to shit on the prick a little further, deliberately trying to show that I too were not paying him mind.

Ain't no pain greater than one who turned attention away from the other when caught in a heated battle of dialect, this I know and that I did.

The silver prick was definitely fuming.

Still paying the prick not a mind- I elbowed Rip slightly and one too many, "I bet my left nut that she likes you!" I told him.

"Uhh! I dunno bro!" he was caught with the hard case of sweats, "I can't even feel my nuts!" he whispered at thine.

How you like this one?

I wrote this while back flipping claimed Lock.

Thank you all again and may you be entertained.

JF_Fanaicreators' thoughts