Duty and Desire

"Don't need you to take care of me, you can go out, I want to sleep," I pushed him away.

But he suddenly pressed me down onto the sofa.

"I can see that you're really sick, how can I not take care of you?" His lips came close to my face as he spoke.

He held my hand in his: "Taking care of you is a boyfriend's duty."

Duty?

Does he think I'm a three-year-old child...

I regretted it, regretted not being more vigilant, now I'm like a lamb in the tiger's mouth.

"Zhou Juan," I whispered his name.

"Hmm," he responded and lightly kissed the corner of my lips, then looked at me and said, "After a few days of not seeing each other, you make me want you with your cuteness."

Me!!!!

His sudden flirtatious words almost made me give up resisting.

"Zhou Juan, can you be more rational?" I kindly reminded him.

"Hmm, haven't seen you for three days, and you tell me to be rational? Huh? Answer me." He kissed me on the lips again.

The gesture was too scary.

I was so nervous that I couldn't breathe, and my heart was out of control.

"Zhou Juan, think about what you promised me." I reminded him desperately, hinting wildly.

"... " He didn't say anything, just looked at me fiercely for a while before saying, "I must have killed someone in my past life, and now in this life, I'm being tortured by you."

Huh? What...

"Why are you so nervous? Just kiss!" He took my hand and intertwined our fingers, and roared at me fiercely.

"Oh." He's really so fierce.

We're supposed to be doing sweet things, yet he's being so mean to me...

"Zhou Juan, can you please not be so mean to me?" I asked him softly.

"Mean?" He didn't even glare at me, just sighed helplessly and said gently, "Okay, be good, baby."

I...

Before I could react, he kissed me. He gently brushed the back of my neck with his hand, causing me to reflexively open my mouth...

After kissing for a while, he let go of me and gasped, "I've known Liu Jing since we were kids, I don't have any feelings for her, so don't think too much about it in the future."

I was dazed by his kiss, and he was lecturing me at this moment?

"Oh." I looked at him longingly, shameful that I was not yet satisfied.

"Still want more?" He smiled at me but pushed himself away, "No more kissing."

I...

"Oh." I felt a little dazed.

"Still staring?" He covered my head with a jacket, not letting me look at him, "You want me to die from the constant teasing."

"... " I didn't say anything, just listened to him, my mind a bit empty.

After a while, he came over again and helped me up from the sofa, "Drink water."

He poured me another cup of hot water.

"Stop drinking in the future." He watched the room environment as he gave me water. "You sleep on the bed, and I'll sleep on the sofa."

"Don't worry, I'm not that much of a beast. I won't do anything to you. I'm just worried that you'll feel uncomfortable at night, so I'll be here for you."

"Oh..." My head was really spinning, and I couldn't think straight.

"You go wash up first. I'll wait for you outside. Call me if you need anything." He went to the bathroom and turned on the water, making sure the temperature was right before urging me to go wash up.

I walked unsteadily towards the bathroom, and he followed behind me. Just as he closed the door, he couldn't help but ask worriedly, "Can you do it alone? If you're really dizzy, I can help you..."

"No need!" I quickly refused.

"Don't trust me? If I help you, I'll be asking for trouble myself. Aren't you happy with that?" He glared at me impatiently.

"It's not that... I trust you." I looked at him seriously.

This boy in front of me, even though he was wild and unrestrained outside, he was still attentive and gentle with me.

People's hearts are made of flesh. I'm not a fool, of course I know he's a good person, and I believe in him.

He didn't go in to wash until I finished washing up and lay down on the bed.

After finishing washing up, he walked over to the sofa and lay down for a while before he remembered something and walked towards me.

I quickly pretended to be asleep.

"Get some rest, good night." He lightly kissed my forehead.

"Zhou Juan." My heart is filled with him at this moment.

"Hmm?" He squatted by the bed, waiting for me to speak.

"Let's date properly." I gathered the courage to express my thoughts.

"Hmm? How should we date?" He looked at me.

With a gentle gaze, as if he would give me the moon if I asked for it.

"You're good, I'm good, and if possible..." I paused for a moment, as if I had made a significant decision. "I want to be with you all the time."

"...," he was stunned for a moment, "why did you suddenly bring this up?"

"I know your girlfriend hasn't been with you for more than three months. I don't want to be like them."

"...," he couldn't help but laugh lightly, "what's going on in that little head of yours?"

"Do you believe the rumors that I've had dozens of girlfriends?"

"What? Isn't it?" I was a bit confused.

"It's just your imagination," he reached out and touched my head. "Don't overthink it."

"It's not my imagination. It's just that you haven't talked to me for a few days, so I..."

"I didn't want to disturb you while you were studying," he sighed.

"That's just an excuse... You..."

"It's me...I made you feel insecure," he continued to comfort me with his hand.

"Zhou Juan...," I thought about what Liujing said to me today, that we were not a good match, and felt upset. "I really like you."

"...," he was completely stunned and couldn't come back to his senses for a while. Finally, he said one word, "Silly."

We were silent for a while, and he turned off the light, still squatting by my bed and asked me, "What do you like about me? I'm not a good person."

I...

"Who said you weren't? I just want to be with you..." Some things really feel shameful when spoken out loud.

"Chen Qiu, I can't promise you anything," he took a deep breath.

"I don't want you to promise me anything."

...

The two of us fell silent again.

I hesitated for a long time before asking softly, "Going to England is something I decided long ago. Are you willing to wait for me?"

As soon as I asked, I felt a bit ashamed of myself.

Why should I make him wait for me?

He wasn't just anyone, he was so proud and there would be all kinds of girls around him. Why choose me?

"... " He was silent for a few seconds, then sat down on the floor, "Chen Qiu, no one can say for sure what will happen in the future."

My heart skipped a beat.

Okay, he really doesn't want to.

"Oh..." I didn't say anything more.

And then the tears flowed from the corner of my eyes again.

He reached out to hold my face, wanting to give me a kiss and then go to bed, but when he felt my tears, he stopped.

"Were you crying?" he asked me softly.

"I wasn't." I avoided his gaze.

"...," he sighed, "Are you really that reluctant to let go of me? Do you love me so much that you can't bear to be apart?"

"No...," I choked out softly.

"Never mind, just get some sleep and stop overthinking everything," he said as he leaned down to give me a kiss on the forehead, tucking me in before turning to go to the sofa.

Feeling the effects of alcohol, I didn't dwell on it too much and drifted off to sleep in a daze.