August, summer, it was the hottest season that could literally melt a man away.
It was half past ten in the morning, the scorching sunlight slipped through the windows and landed directly on Bai Yang's exposed body. As a result, the heat forcibly awoke him.
This brat had already graduated two months ago. Now, he was not restricted by studies anymore and was living the time of his life. As for the dream of earning lots of money after his graduation, it only remained a dream.
"Why is this life so harsh on me."
He was only half awake when he got up from his bed. He touched his body and found himself fully covered in his own sweat. He grumbled quietly and walked toward the bathroom.
It was only after he brushed his teeth that he was finally fully awake. He proceeded to the living room and was left speechless when he found out that his parents didn't leave any breakfast for him at all. What a cruel life!
"My gosh, although I'm an adult now, mom and dad, you two still don't have to be so cruel to your son, at least save some food for me! Am I really your biological son? What's with all those talks about the children will always be the parents' little babies that will forever be taken care of and looked after…"
He murmured softly and complained to himself. Then, Bai Yang casually returned to his room, opened his drawer, and pulled out a cup of instant noodles.
"You think I'd starve to death without your food? You underestimate me."
Bai Yang felt triumphant, he filled the cup noodle with hot water from the water dispenser and left it on the coffee table in the living room. Then, he slumped onto the couch in the most comfortable posture and fired up the television, flipping from one channel to another.
However, other than brainless dramas and meaningless advertisements, there was nothing else. Needless to say, he was not satisfied with anything on offer.
"When the fiery smoke rises I look at the vast land towards the north…."
The ringtone of his phone blared and Bai Yang unwillingly squirmed his body a few times to get to the phone just ten centimeters away from the tip of his fingers. Well, the weather was so damn hot, every single movement was torture to him.
He picked up the phone and looked at the caller's id — it was mom.
"Hello, mom, so you still remember you have a son."
"Little brat, you've just woke up from bed? You'd better off just die of laziness. I wonder what kind of sins I committed in my previous life to have a son like you in this life… You are having cup noodles again, aren't you? You little brat, when will you actually step up and take good care of yourself like an adult, aish, why do I have to worry so much about you…"
As the saying went, a mother knew her son best. Even it was just through the phone, his mother was still able to know his situation as clearly as if she were right next to him.
After her reprimand, Bai Yang replied with just three words, "State your purpose."
"Brat, how could you talk to me like this…. I called because of you. You've already graduated for two months now, long enough for you to enjoy your wild and free life. Now, I will give you two options. One, get a job and start working within a month…"
"And two?" When there are multiple choices, of course Bai Yang would have to listen about all of them first.
"Two, if you don't want to get a job. I have a few girls around in my working unit here. Bring one of them back to the house as my daughter-in-law. Whatever expenses you've spent in the process will be on me…"
"Mom, I choose one. I will start finding a job right after this call. A few more days and you will see me going out of the house and working every day. My cup noodle is ready now. That's it. Alright, bye-bye…" After he finished talking, Bai Yang decisively hung up the call.
Then, he swept away the sweat on his forehead, How scary. I'm now in the golden years. How could I ever allow myself to be taken away so easily? A girlfriend is fine, but spare me from an arranged marriage. I still haven't played enough yet.
He tossed the phone away and slowly pulled himself off the couch, reaching his hand out for the cup noodle on the coffee table and slurping a mouthful of noodles with the fork. Then, he leaned backward on the couch again.
"What the…!"
Bai Yang could feel his butt missing the couch and falling straight for the floor. But the couch had just been behind him, only a few centimeters away from his butt, how could he have missed it?
He fell to the ground and the cup noodle splashed out over his body, burning him. He jumped up from the ground and started slapping on the burned surface on his body when suddenly in the next second, he was stunned and his whining stopped.
He stared in front of him and his eyes flared wide open.
"What is this!"
A moment ago, Bai Yang was still in his house's living room, but now, he was in a lush forest. Tall, verdant trees wrapped in thick vines towered over him. He could detect the fragrance of flowers as the breeze wafted their scent into his nose.
The air was so refreshing, every breath he took felt like his body being fully cleansed inside and out.
Shirtless, an undershorts, a pair of flip-flops, a mouth filled with noodles, a hand holding a fork and another hand holding the half-splashed cup noodle; Bai Yang was stunned in an awkward posture.
He swallowed a mouthful of saliva but forgot that he still had the noodles in his mouth. As a result, he choked on the noodles and coughed nonstop. After spending some time clearing his mouth, Bai Yang finally had a better look at his surroundings and he felt like bursting into tears, except that he had no tears to shed.
"Sha… sha… sha…"
Three meters away from Bai Yang, inside a bush, a one-meter long black centipede made its horrifying appearance. It then took a turn and disappeared into a crack on a stone seconds later…
"Where exactly is this place!"
Bai Yang murmured in terror. The massive centipede terrified him into unknowingly taking a step back, and a sharp pain immediately shot up his leg. He inhaled a deep breath of cold air and raised his foot. A thorn had penetrated through his flip-flops and into his feet…
Then, a sharp pain suddenly struck him on his shoulder again. Out of reflex, he threw the cup noodle in his hand and slapped on the shoulder where the pain was. Turn his hand over revealed mosquito the size of a baby's fist smushed in a pool of blood!
"A huge centipede, a huge mosquito, have I warped through a wormhole into an African forest…!?"
He looked around with his eyes wide and mouth agape. The trees were so wide that they would require several people to wrap around it. Furthermore, there wasn't a single plant Bai Yang could recognize in sight.
Then, as soon as he looked up and saw the sky through the gaps in the leaves, Bai Yang was left bewildered. Was that the sun in the sky? But why was its color different? The sun was supposed to be reddish in the morning and golden-yellow in the afternoon; but what's with the ball of light hanging high in the sky?
"Is this teleportation? This is teleportation, right!? But I'm not ready yet, at least let me get the whole equipment first. What the heck is this, throwing me to this kind of place with flip-flops and boxers!"
The moment before he didn't even want to move because of the hot weather, but now, he was feeling cold from top to bottom. After all, getting thrown in such a place all of a sudden, anyone would be terrified and afraid!
Hu…
A vicious wind came from the back accompanied by a deafening howl of a tiger, Bai Yang felt like his entire head was about to explode in the loud howl, having a first hand experience of a tiger howling in the woods.
He turned around and saw a five-meter long tiger lunging toward him.
I'm dying, this freaking teleportation, I want to go home…! Bai Yang shouted in despair in his heart and in the next second, he disappeared from the spot.
Bang!
The ferocious tiger landed on the ground with nothing under its claws, its head titled slightly as if it was wondering where its prey went.
Then, the tiger shook its head and returned to the bushes, leaving behind a broken flip-flop and a cup noodle that had spilled on the ground.
Shua…
A low and deep noise sounded through the air concomitant with a fleeting black flash.
Pak—
A black arrow pierced through the tiger's eye and nailed it to the ground. Its body twitched for a few seconds before it completely stopped moving.
Footsteps could be heard heading toward the scene and three muscular and brawny men like iron towers arrived beside the dead tiger. They were wearing animal skins, with large bows on their backs, and their eyes were as sharp as knives.
"Haha, Brother Zhao has good archery skills, penetrated through the tiger's eyes with just one arrow without hurting its skin. This tiger skin can certainly be sold for a good price."
One of them had a scar on his face, he was the biggest in size, but looked a bit more immature than the rest of the two. He said with a look of admiration on his face while touching the dead tiger's skin.
"I'm really nothing, as long as Hu Zi practices archery with all your heart, you will surpass me sooner or later." The person called Brother Zhao shook his head and smiled. He was about 1.8 meters tall, tanned and sweaty. His arms were huge, with the muscle fibers bulging all over his body. However, the crows feet at the corners of his eyes couldn't hide his middle age.
The third young man squatted on the ground with a frown, twitching his nose a few times and sweeping the leaves off from the ground, revealing the splashed cup noodles and pierced flip-flop.
"Brother Zhao, Hu Zi, come here and see what is this. It's smells so nice, I can't help but salivate…"
"Zhu Zi found something good?" The boy named Hu Zi walked over while saying.
"Look at this, doesn't it smell incredible?" Zhu Zi pointed at the cup noodles on the ground while salivating as he answered.
"What is this? It looks so weird, but it sure smells nice." Hu Zi swallowed a mouth of saliva.
"Hu Zi, do you think this can be eaten? Hey, look, this cup is so exquisite. Huh, there's a man on it, I wonder who drew it on the cup. It looks so real, like it's alive. Are those words? They should be words, right? But I can't seem to understand it. No one in the village knows how to read…" Zhu Zi crawled on the ground and blabbered nonstop looking at the cup noodles.
"What have you all found?" Brother Zhao walked toward them in vigilant. When he smelled the cup noodles, he too, couldn't help but swallow a mouthful of saliva. When he saw the cup noodles, he was just as puzzled as the other two.
"This cup, it looks so well made. We can sell it for a high price. I wonder which nobleman left it here. Hu Zi, Zhu Zi, bring the cup along. Careful not to break it. We might even use this cup to exchange for a precious rare book." Brother Zhao said solemnly.
So the three disregarded the dead tiger and carried the cup with them like a precious treasure. Whereas for the splashed noodles on the ground, they were eaten by them. It was so delicious that they nearly gnawed a hole on the ground.
Bai Yang's arrival and departure were baffled and without reason. But if he knew that the three men would ignore the dead tiger and turn to a cup of instant noodles instead, he would've fallen to the ground in shock. However, even if he was there on the spot, he wouldn't understand a single word they said either.
Bang…
Bai Yang fell and sank into the couch in his living room. Cold sweat soaked his clothes as he sat there in shock. He maintained the same position for tens of minutes before finally regaining his senses again.
"Where am I…?" He looked at the familiar house with a blank mind.
It was as if he was wasted from drinking too much alcohol and couldn't remember what had just transpired. It took him some time to recall the incident of him somehow appearing inside of a forest and nearly getting eaten by a tiger bigger than any tiger he had seen on the TV before.…
"What the heck… Could it be that the weather is so hot that I had hallucinations from a heatstroke?" The bewildered Bai Yang murmured, he raised his hand to wipe the cold sweat on his head and was suddenly stunned when he saw a blade of grass in his hand!
He was holding grass!
"When the tiger lunged at me, I remember randomly grabbing something in my hand…" Bai Yang's throat turned dry as he stared at the grass…
TN:
Lost in translation:
握了棵草 "Held A Grass"
is homophones of
卧了个槽 "F... me"
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