Not Ready

Shana was silent, she didn't know what to react to the bright and innocent Jeni. Her hobby is playing to the library and she doesn't have a boyfriend or many friends.

"B-how to get pregnant?" That's all Shana can say. It never crossed her mind, if Jeni would fall into promiscuity.

"At least someone should know that."Jeni closed her eyes, along with the students' screams and Shana's quick-paced steps.

She grabbed Jeni's arm, even though Jeni had just felt freedom and floated peacefully, until Jeni opened her eyes when she felt her body hanging down-resigned.

She looked up at Shana who was almost carried away by the plunge, although fortunately Degun helped by holding the two women by the shoulders.

"Let go of Shana," Jeni said.

"No, we can talk about this. I will be a good listener for you, " Shana said.

"Too Late Shana... Don't pretend to be a good class leader. If you had listened to me back then, it probably wouldn't have been like this," Jeni said softly. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a penknife that made Degun also widen his bead.

"Let Go Of Shana!" press Degun.

"Sorry, I'll listen to you. Quickly hold my hand firmly, I will-Arkhh!" Shana groaned when the knife suddenly scraping the wrist of her upper arm.

Where Shana shouts the name of a student who escapes her grasp and chooses to end life. Simply because Jeni does not know what to do about the tragedy that happened to her.

Actually, Jeni is just necessary... Interlocutor.

***

"Welcome!" greet the disciples in unison. Dirgan shows off a row of teeth with a sweet from both corners of his lips rising to the top perfectly as he gets a rousing welcome from all the students.

Tragedy two days ago, Jeni who committed suicide in the school building is still being investigated by the police.

But this kind of welcome event cannot be canceled when they have prepared a party. The event dedicated to aerospace back to school was even very festive.

Starting from a joint meal session, as well as a soda party at Class hours which was again interrupted, it became a pleasure for the students.

The school did not show condolences to any of their students who died. This jet - black-haired man, with a solid brown monolith is listening to the whole story about Jeni who ended her life at school.

This firm jaw with thin lips and sharp nose, has captivated many women even though Dirgan has been fixated on the only woman who never visits when he is sick.

"Shana is hurt?" asked Dirgan.

"Yes, some of the students saw it clearly, Shana with the new students tried to pull it, but Jeni even pulled out a knife and injured Shana's arm until the grip was released," Ari said.

Dirgan nodded. He then heads to the theater hall with a few students who follow as they all miss their big boss. Shana faces a mild interrogation after getting permission from her family and the principal. But until now, Shana has not said anything to satisfy the investigators.

"Who is the man next to her?" asked Dirgan.

"That's a new student. His name is Degun, Shana will only take him to class before the incident happens, " said Redi.

"How do you know?"

"Degun has told me everything he has seen, but Shana seems to need time. Yesterday, she even fainted after crying hysterically," said Redi.

Dirgan sighed, he paid strong attention to Shana who hadn't changed a bit other than her hair becoming shorter. Shana is much prettier now. Her peachy lip blush even pulled Dirgan to immediately hug Shana who needed help on stage there.

"Answer! Your testimony is required Miss Shana!" snapped someone. This one cop is really impatient because they haven't come to fruition for two long days, because Shana is silent.

Shana won't say anything, because Jeni also definitely doesn't want to talk about this with anyone. Jeni just wants to reveal a lot with Shana alone.

Shana is also unlikely to say Jeni committed suicide because she was pregnant. Then Jeni has no friends to talk to, as Shana rejects her. The existing Jeni will only be the subject of Winter's student Gossip.

"She's like a depressed person. Are you going to see her?" asked Ari.

"No, I want Shana to see me first. Let it go, this will be a lesson for her. Interference in other people's Affairs. Shana shouldn't hold back people who want to die."

***

"This is Shan, you have been crying for Jeni for a long time," said Agus. He rubbed the top of Shana's head because this cheerful woman had been looking gloomy for a week.

Shana doesn't eat, and she doesn't do anything like the rest of her friends. Bayu and Lisa and Crystal are also increasingly worried about Shana's condition.

Because Shana is still imagining, what a tragic way Jeni ended life. Shana can still see clearly, how both legs and Jeni's head are smashed hard into the shower water of the school pool.

Shana really didn't talk. She just shrugged her shoulders and shed tears. She should have talked to Jeni and not avoided her friend.

Shana's parents had already told Dirgan because her son locked herself in the room. She didn't eat or talk. Dirgan, who was originally going to restrain his pride so as not to approach Shana, turned out to have to enter the Social building, approaching Shana who was getting an outpouring of attention from her friends.

Agus and the others also spontaneously resign, they make room for Dirgan to try to provide entertainment to Shana.

"Hi Baby..." said Dirgan. Shana then turns a languid look at Hell that has arrived at school, this handsome man who became a demon for her is almost forgotten is back in school.

"Long time no see, let's talk," Dirgan said. He pulled Shana's wrist until the woman grimaced when Dirgan accidentally grasped her wound. Dirgan then lowered his grip on Shana's fingers and dragged this woman to quickly fill her stomach into the cafeteria.

"You... When IS school?" asked the calm Shana.

"It's been four days, I think you will be the same as the others greet me by saying Welcome. But it wasn't," Dirgan said. He pulled up an empty chair for Shana who sat there straight away.

"What do you want to eat?" asked Dirgan.

"I'm not hungry," Shana said.

"Really? You look ugly now. Maybe it's because you rarely eat."Shana did not respond to what Dirgan said until this person sighed patiently, because usually Shana hissed when he was said ugly.

Dirgan then orders two servings of Shana's favorite food, plus mint chocolate as a drink that Shana never tires of consuming. Dirgan sat down, he looked at the face of the person he had missed for a year.

All he could think about was Shana. Who does not know their love story from the tenth grade first. Maybe the students thought their relationship was ruined since Dirgan dropped out of school, and Shana looks close to veri.

Dirgan will satisfy by continuing to gaze lovingly at Shana, although the woman even turns her gaze to the roof of the Social building with beads that continue to be left wet.

Shana's daydreams are then dispelled, by the two extra spicy chicken-cabbage rice dishes she often orders. Then a bowl of chicken soup with the addition of mint chocolate is served in front of him.

"Eat," Dirgan Said.

"I'm not hungry."

"Do it for me. eat alone or forced?" bid Dirgan. Shana caught her breath. She then took a spoon and took the rice then mixed it with the chicken soup.

She ate limp food because Dirgan would force her if she did not obey his wishes. Dirgan thrusts the fork that Shana receives. She pokes the cock and splits it limp. Chicken soup is the best food according to Shana if eaten when she is dizzy.

However, now Shana is silent and staring, the minced meat that reminds Shana of Jeni's legs. What about the fetus? It must have been torn apart by the impact, the baby inside was probably crushed like the minced meat she ate.

Shana releases her spoon and fork after a panic attack that makes her arms tremble. She reaches for the mint brown glass anxiously, until Shana's throat heats up as the water in the glass appears to turn dark red like blood.

The food in her body felt up again, Shana's head was very dizzy. She rushed to the sink behind the cafeteria. Regurgitate all the food that has just entered her body.

Those who accompanied her clearly knew. Shana can go crazy for the near future if she keeps it to herself what is the cause of Jeni's death. Dirgan will try to be patient with his girlfriend who is going through a mental crisis.

He gently caresses Shana's back and lets her spit out all the things that become parasites of the woman's grief

"Shana, you should—"

"Argh! Get away from me motherfucker! It's all because of you!"

To Be Continued...