Chapter 27 : I understand Jiraya

Authors note: Read until the end of chapter to understand Mc's thoughts and actions.

-p.s: Please comment and review after reading the chapter. Especially, if you like it.

 -------------------------------------------------------------

-----Kinchin town, border town of Land of rivers, near to the Konoha-Suna war front-----

The quiet buzz of the bar had settled into a low hum, and I nursed what felt like my hundredth sigh of the night. It had been nearly a month since Dan Kato and the tailed beast went down.

In any normal world, losing Dan wouldn't have affected Konoha's tactical strength so much, considering his skills are most useful for single targets. Or uncontrolled tailed beasts like Shukaku. Well, Shukaku's disastrous relations with his hosts has no equal. I mean, the tailed beast had allowed death rather than even make a hint of co-operation with his host, allowing a weakness that Tsunade and Dan exploited.

So, Konoha was happy with the results, but Tsunade? She'd fallen hard. Her grief was all-consuming, and with it, the slug princess had turned into a near-stranger—a sad, drunken shadow of herself, anchored to the bottom of a sake bottle.

With Tsunade out, the heavy lifting had fallen to the Ino-Shika-Cho trio=, leading the remaining forces to fend off the Sand's desperate last-ditch attacks. They had a strategy, sure, but there was something unsettling about knowing we were on our own with the person we should rely on stumbling through the streets, scaring off half of bar-hoppers in this town.

Still, I thought Kusa was miserable, but the land of rivers that acts as a buffer between Suna and Konoha is even more miserable. Konoha shinobi go through this land as if it is their home,

THUD

"Aras, Bit-"

CRACK

WHOOOSH

The sounds of another fool being thrown out of Tsunade's latest drinking hole made my eye twitch. He landed hard outside, groaning, his whole body sagging. It was clear he'd tried something he shouldn't have, maybe a dumb attempt to take advantage of Tsunade, and he'd paid for it with a bruised pride and a face redder than the lanterns swinging over the bar door. But as I squinted at him through the smoky haze, I could see multiple broken bones, but I also found what I was searching for.

The guy didn't have a scratch on him. Not even a split lip. Tsunade would normally have put him through a wall. I turned my gaze back inside, watching as she downed another glass, head slumping forward. She was holding back. Way back. And it wasn't just tonight.

I leaned against the wall, crossing my arms, chewing on the realization that had been scratching at the back of my mind for weeks. Ever since Dan's death, she hadn't touched blood. Meaning that just like canon, she has been broken.

It must seem like a preposterous thing for even the most seasoned shinobi to conclude. Even if they Root, feeling the calm state my squad mates, it seems they didn't think of it. How could they?

Tsunade Senju, the medic who'd seen every manner of injury, of battlefield horror…was afraid of blood. Or maybe "afraid" wasn't the right word. Haunted? Tortured? I wasn't sure. But it made sense, in a horrible, tragic way. This was the one person who couldn't stand to let anyone die, and she'd lost the one she held dearest.

The irony was as cruel as the kunai I kept strapped to my side.

Even more ironic was the sanin whose fighting style made blood bloom like flowers to be afraid of blood.

With another sigh, I pushed myself off the wall and stepped back into the bar. The crowd was already settling into another round, because, of course, she'd announced it was on her tab. I navigated through the mess of tables, feeling the faint tremor of frustration run through me. Frankly speaking, I know Dan wouldn't have wanted her to be like this. To spiral. But no one could tell her that now. In a way, I am guilt of the fact that Dan's last words were more traumatizing than the canon.

---------==-----------

Dan's breathing slowed, and he gripped her hand, his eyes flickering shut, his last words a soft whisper. "Don't… forget me."

--------==-----------

Fuck, I messed up. It was due to me he said something like that. Perhaps teasing him that if he doesn't fuck Tsunade soon, the Senju princess will leave him in time was a bit too much. Especially adding the list of her pursuers not but limited to her childhood friend/teammate, Jiraiya was too much.

Unfortunately, I didn't stop my teasing of Dan there. Instead, I went a step further by saying that she was the last of the Senju line. She needs Dan's help far too much. That was fine, but I just had to say that Shinobi is a dangerous profession and if Dan dies, she has no choice but to seek another guy to continue her responsibilities.

I may or may not have used Danzo's name here and there about that prospective future. Well, it was a pass time in Root to talk about each other's death and their usefulness. So, I kinda Dan's prospective death in teasing/forcing Dan to man up and fuck his girlfriend. But, damn.

The dude took it to heart and said them as his last words. I know it. As an S-rank Info analyst of Root and the direct reason for the events, I knew why Dan said such selfish last words.

 And as if those words are the words of the bible, Tsunade is following them religiously.

Like every minute since then, she is unconscious or drunk, doing her best reminiscence about Dan. So much so that I am getting scared. I don't know if this happened in Canon. If it did, I am not surprised that Tsunade could roam around. All the money I made from Pizza shop and my mission pay can barely cover the debts that Tsunade left in this month. And scarily, the rate of her spending is increasing every day.

I slid onto the stool next to her, watching as her bleary eyes lifted, just barely focusing on me. "You'll run yourself dry at this rate," I muttered, my voice soft, though I knew she wasn't fully there.

As much as it scares, I am the only out of the current protection squad who knew her personally. So, I had to be the one to at least give her a talk of emotional support. That and I can fix myself up and that made me confident to step up for the task.

Tsunade snorted, half a laugh, half a sigh. "Konoha has enough medics. Besides, what do you care, brat? Come to drag me out like some nursemaid?"

I didn't flinch, didn't let her dig get to me. I looked at her, letting the weight of what I wanted to say settle in the air between us. "You're better than this, Tsunade-sama. Dan wouldn't…"

She shot me a glare, her eyes narrowing, but it was weak, laced with a dull ache. I'd hit a nerve. She knew it. "Don't you say his name to me," she said, voice low, like it hurt to even let the words leave her mouth.

The air was heavy as rain outside fell, pattering on the roof, barely audible over the sounds of glasses clinking and laughter around us.

Tsunade turned away, shoulders slumped, eyes fixed on her drink. And I stayed there, silent, watching her. So, I decided to say, "Hmm! I might be the reason that Dan's last words were so selfish."

"HUH!"

Feeling her whirling chakra, I took a gulp of my saliva and spit it out. "You see, I might have teased him far too much regarding his insecurities. Like your rich status, beauty, wealth, and strength. Like far too much."

I could see Tsunade's fist tightening. But she just looked at me, with enough life in her eyes that made me wonder if I somehow got Naruto's talk no jutsu. I have been aiming for that skill for a long time.

"I might have also teased him a bit too much that a guy like him would be forgotten if he didn't seal the deal of marriage with a woman like you. Like every day."

I was expecting a punch. Instead, she just opened another sake bottle and gulped it down.

"Hm! Rather than marriage, you must have said something like fucking me right. Many teased us the same way. HAAHAHAHA, here, drink for some sake, your sad face is ruining my mood. HAHAA,"

"Thank you, Tsunade-sama."

I must say the Tsunade has quite a shameless mouth on her. But why did I not hear such news from Dan or anyone else?

GULP GULP

I don't know what I was gulping so vigorously, sake or my saliva. As Tsunade's drunken drinking spilled sake on her impressive breasts, her kimono became disorganized.

"Nice view, right?"

I almost nodded before my training kicked in and I augmented my entire body with the chakra. As if knowing my capabilities, Tsunade also stuffed her fist with chakra.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

The first cracks in the walls shook the building before I'd even registered what was happening. I'd half-expected a punch from Tsunade, but… not this.

BOOOOMM

Hmm, is that the whorehouse?

BOOM

WHHH

Boom

As I was sent through the whorehouse, I realized it was not a whorehouse. Instead, it was high end music hall.

BOOOM

"AHHHH!"

BOOm

"What-"

Why in the hell I am speeding up?

BOOOM

BOOOM

BOOOM

[AI Medical Record of Host : #324

Rib Fractures and Sternum Bruising: The initial impact would shatter several ribs and bruise the sternum, which would cause intense pain and difficulty breathing, but these can heal fully with rest and proper immobilization.

Unilateral Pneumothorax (Collapsed Lung): One lung could collapse because of the shockwave's pressure, making it difficult to breathe. This can fully heal with chest drainage and breathing exercises.

Concussion: The force of the impact could cause a concussion, leading to headaches, dizziness, and memory issues.

Contusions and hematomas: Deep bruising and blood pooling in muscle tissues around the chest and abdomen would be painful but recoverable, given time, ice, and light physical therapy.

Compression Fractures in the Vertebrae: Small fractures in the spine could cause back pain but can fully heal with surgery and post-op-rest, bracing, and gradual strengthening exercises.

Shoulder and Elbow Dislocations: Attempting to block or absorb the punch's force could dislocate major joints, but with reduction (re-positioning) and physical therapy, the joints can return to full function.

Internal Bleeding (Controlled): Small bruising to the liver or kidneys can heal naturally if the bleeding is controlled early. These injuries require close monitoring but allow for full recovery.

Chance of death if no treatment: 73%

Chance of crippling if no treatment: 93%

Time left for treatment: 12hr]

I think I understood Jiraiya's words when he said he came close to death under Tsunade's fist and compared it with Naruto going berserk under the tailed beast chakra.

Every injury can be healed, but risky for my continued survival. I don't know if she wanted to do it like this or not. No, she wantedly did it.

I immediately started up on healing my brain by wrapping around the leaked blood in it and did the same to my internal organs. Afterwards, I did my best to roll over.

"ARGH!"

As I was face down, I lifted my arms to my back and started the surgery on spine, hopefully not crippling myself in the future.

BUZZZ

As the Chakra Scapel came to life, I plunged it into my back.

Thankfully, it only cuts things I need to cut, otherwise it would be a pain in the ass. But, damn. I am proud to say I am a medic genius who can operate on himself and come out it with shining success. I am just a step before Kabuto's achievement of instant self healing. Chakra, Oh Chakra! I really need Chakra reserves. It is the only thing holding me back right now.

WHOOSH

WHOOSH

As I saw my teammates, both the Anbu and Root ones, I asked them, "Can someone get me to the medic tent in the camp? I am very close to crippling myself or dying?"

WHOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHHHHH

As I was being escorted out while I was reconnecting the nerve from my spinal cord to the nerve of my penis, I realized Tsunade took my teasing of Dan personally.

My sarcasm made me life, "HAHAHA!!"

Especially when the operation succeeded and my dick hardened with all its glory, sending me the sensations of it pressing onto Anbu armour of the guy carrying. I have never been more thankful because the Anbu armour is so thick and strong. Otherwise, I would have committed social suicide.

------------------------Konoha War camp, a week later------------

It had been a week since then. A week since I came close to dying and got an extended medical leave.

After double checking and ensuring I am alone, I felt relief. My plan worked, and I finally got the free time from my war machine of village I serve. You will be surprised how difficult it is to move freely in Konoha. Now, I am legally allowed to rest in a tent, with a lot of free time to recover.

[Host health status-100%]

Hehe! Provoking Tsunade was worth it. Though I didn't think I would risk my life.

I can start plan to leave Root.

The most critical step was the first step. The success of this Jutsu.

I took the iconic custom hand seal which connected the chakra paths in the specialized routes as per the Jutsu instructions. As the Chakra followed the route specified-

POOOF

""I succeeded""

Looking at my mirror image dressed in various bandages, I smiled.

"How much did you get?"

"There has been 35% Chakra loss. But, I got the rest of the chakra reserves. Considering the rate of consumption, you got a week."

60 % of my chakra weeks for a week, no wonder Shadow clone is termed Kinjutsu. If it wasn't for my S-rank Chakra control, I might have been suffering from Chakra exhaustion.

[Shadow clone [B]]

I removed my bandages and dressed in my armour, considering I was fully healed. Using this chance, I am going to do something that will allow me to walk out of root with my head held high.

Dan, Nono and Minato did the same by making impressive achievements and giving their creations to Konoha. My chakra armour can replace the latter part, now I am lacking in the first part, achievements.

What is better than finding the actual killer of the third Kazekage and clearing Konoha's name internationally?

I don't even need to do much according to the information I analysed.

[Info analysis and gathering [S] ]

A skill I am proud to possess after training with the help of AI to spot the smallest clues in my environment and the data sheets using its various algorithms. Initially, I was too slow, but after multiple missions and experience; I am discount sherlock holmes.

WHOOSH

WHOOSH

Mister Sand Scorpion, I am coming.

----------Chapter end---------------

Name: Kyudo Kirito

Age: 11 years old 2 months old

Chakra: 45,000 [mid Chunin]

Physique: Elite Chunin

Chakra Control: S-rank 

Chakra Control Exercises: Water osmosis- 1000/1000; Rasengan[A] 3rd step-24/1000

Nature Transformations: Fire Nature: 1000/1000 [A-rank], Wind nature: 440/1000 [C-rank], Water nature : 800/ 1000 [B-rank]

Combat Skills:

Taijutsu:

Shurikenjutsu [C-rank],Konoha Kenjutsu- Tanto [B-rank], Advanced Konoha Taijutsu (1000/1000)- Personalised [A-rank] 

Dummy styles: Iwa Taijutsu - 200/1000 [C-rank], Kumo Taijustu-400/1000 [B-rank], Kirigakure Taijutsu - 700/100 [B-rank], Kirigakure Kenjutsu -Tanto [B-rank], Suna Taijutsu- 650/1000 [A-rank]

Ninjutsu:

Academy Jutsu [D],

Mystic Palm Jutsu: Mastered [A], Chakra Scalpel: Mastered [A]

Fire style: Fireball [D], Great Fireball [C], Severing slash [B], Oil Explosion [A], Phoenix fireball [A]

Wind Style: Gale palm [D], Wind Breakthrough [C]. Great Breakthrough [B].

Water Style : Water bullet [C], Severing Waves [B], Water Dragon [B]

Genjutsu:

Pain Relief, Stimulation, Illusionary Escape- [D]

Demonic Hell viewing Jutsu, Tree binding Wrap- [C]

Burning Hell-[B]

Other Skills:

Chakra Disruption: 1000/1000

Chakra Augmentation: 1000/1000

Tsunade's Chakra Enchancement: 12/1000 [S-rank]

[S-rank] Sensor: 1050 meters

Deciphering Ancient Scrolls and Texts: Mastered

Fuinjutsu : 2500/10000 

[Storage seals, Fire element seals, medic seals, explosion tags, water element seals]

Training:

Weighted Training: 100 kg weights on each limb, 400 kg vest for the torso (In progress)

Chakra Pill Digestion: Mastery.

Root Training: Sign languages [S], Tracking [A], Info analysis and gathering [S], Disguise [S]

Medic Ninjutsu: Muscle formation and strengthening [A] -[*WARNING*Life span lost- 15 years]