My SI Stash #84 - The Story of a Misplaced Guy by Cimmang5 (DCU)

-This story has got some huge potential, the grammar is a bit annoyingly bad. But just a little bit of correcting and it's looking to be a satisfying one!

*SI that'll be Penguin's temporary remplacement. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

*I corrected the Chapter 1, the grammar of the other chapters are a bit bad but still understandable!

Sypnosis: A poor soul was "misplaced" to DC universe. Using his wits and information from reading every DC universe related media, and godlike power. He must found a way back home to erase a dark "history". Even if it means dwells with Gotham criminal underground, freeloading at Wayne manor, steal from the Guardians on Oa, or visiting Darkseid and Trigon for poker. Rated T for terrible

Rated: T

Words: 30K

Posted on: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12813178/1/The-Story-of-a-Misplaced-guy (Cimmang5)

PS: If you're not able to copy/paste the link, you have everything in here to find it, by simply searching the author and the story title. It sucks that you can't copy links on mobile (*´ー｀*)

-I'll be putting the chapter ones of all the fanfics mentioned, to give you guys a sample if you wan't more please do go to the website and support the author! (And maybe even convince them to start uploading chapters in here as well!)

Chapter 1

Author Note: A terrible story I wrote whenever I've got free time. Leave a review or something if you like it.

Cold

That's the last thing he remembered, Before the light got to him, and after that. Void. just the void

'Did I die?'

He couldn't remember the cause of death, was it a knife? bullet? an unfortunate road accident? Whatever it is, it happened. It may have happened too soon but nothing can be changed. He's now lost, alone in thought, reminiscing his greatest regret.

'Damn, I should've finished Skyrim'

Before that, before the cold, it was quite clear. Remarkably clear, he has a- no, he had a family, his father told him that family lives on, in memory and in heart. A bullshit cliché quote, but nevertheless he appreciates everything that makes his current predicament much more peaceful. Nevertheless in those short life of his, it had been quite memorable.

'Wonder what they'll put in my epitaph?'

He went to college, had a girlfrie- no, ex-girlfriend. He had friends, but none couldn't be called best friends, he was the type of guy that fits in with everybody else. A jack of all trades, master of none. He had no siblings, an only child.

'Now that I really think about it, I had a sorry life'

The Void's pulling him in, but the light keeps him company.

Lost in his thoughts, wondering what they would do to his belongings, his family... Will they give everything away? Would they sell it? He had a sizeable collection of miscellaneous items, he was quite the collector. He had several Jerseys, basketball and football alike, various teams, barely used. His fishing baits and car parts, those'll costs a lot. His comics and novel books, half of them he never finished. He had quite a column of boardgames and Video games, neatly placed in his untidy room. And a hundred more in his computer . . .

his computer . . .

The light stirred, disturbed by its host's thought. His mind awakes at the thought of his computer.

"MY BROWSING HISTORY!"

He finally snapped out of his trance, he sees the darkness around and nothing else, nothing but an orb of light that kept him company. Near him, a concentrated bright light shines, the light that keeps the darkness at bay.

He looked around, trying to find a door, or a window, or anything to get him back. He need to do this, he needs to erase the dark history of his life, or he'll never be at peace.

"Ahhh fuck! anyone! is anyone here!?" He yelled, his voice giving out echoes in the void. He tried doing a swimming gesture, to see if he's actually moving. He is not. "Anyone!?"

'Stop resisting'

He didn't know where the voice came from, it was a shrilling echoes of mixed voices. But it somehow felt like, it came from his own head...

"Hello, can you hear me?" He tried to find a response, to make sure he's not alone in the dark.

'I can hear you frail one, now stop resisting so your passing will be quick and peaceful'

There it is again, voice can only be described as, echoes, of various sound, a combination of men and women speaking in unison. Somehow it felt like, the voices were crawling in his mind.

"Who are you?"

'I'm death"

"And I'm Captain Crunch, seriously who are you?"

'I told you already, I'm Death. Now cease your pitiful resistance, I'm currently waiting for your fate'

"Fate? My fate? What does it mean?" The "frail" one asked, he stopped swimming after he realize it accomplished nothing.

'I'm waiting for a message from my master'

"Your boss?"

'Yes, he's the one who decide where I would take you'

"Actually I was wondering if you could take me ba-"

'They're currently judging your life, each second, every decisions, and what you had accomplished. Before deciding whether it's Hell or Heaven for You'.

The last word sounded intimidating

"Wait, what!?" He started to panic, he lived a good life, no drugs, no criminal records, heck he bought Winrar!

But inside his room, the things he saw in his computer, the things he kept at his computer, the jokes he laughed at. The memes he liked. . .

Hell, it's gotta be hell

But hell be damned, what he needed to do now is more important, otherwise peace is an impossibility.

"Please, I need to go back, I'm begging you good sir-"

'I am no man' Said Death

"Oh, I- I'm sorry mam, but-"

'I am no woman'

"OH C'MON, HERE TOO! I DEAL WITH THIS BULLSHIT IN MY LIFE I DON'T NEED IT IN DEATH!"

'SILENCE!' The voice screamed, worse, it screamed in his head.

'You shall not question me mortal, I'm only doing my job, I've been in this business since the dawn of time, Dawn Of Time! Do you know how boring it is stuck in a job since the dawn of time!' Death complained for half an hour, a miserable scene.

'You're not the first, to ask to return, to ask for salvation. Devil tricks! Speak of the devil, your fate has come'.

The poor soul contemplated, accepting whatever fate awaited him.

The ensuing silence scares him, whatever caught Death's tongue, he knew it wasn't good. He was never a religious figure, but the concept of hell wasn't alien to him, and it scares him, of fire soo hot it melt your skins, of torture and screams of the damned.

But nothing more frightening than someone, maybe his mother, or any of his cousins, sitting in front his PC, innocently opening his browser, then seeing the history.

'I wanted to say kill me, but I'm already dead'

And then, Death spoke, revealing his fate, revealing gods judgement upon him

It's first words are. 'Oh shit'

"What? Is something wrong"

'No, nothing, nothing, just a minor technical fault'.

The sounds of a paper being crushed and thrown away followed.

"Technical fault?"

'yeah, apparently I- I took . . . the wrong soul'

.

.

.

Silence

.

.

.

"YOU WHAT?!"

'Look, I told you it has been a long shift, it might be because I'm too tired from last night poker with Gabrie-'

"YOU FCKING WHAT!"

'Now, now. Everyone make faults sometimes, even death. That say... no wonder your death seems... outlandishly sudden'

The word outlandish came through his head, he remember it know, the cause of death, the reason of the chilling cold.

It was the middle of august, it has been a hellish day at campus. He came straight home, not even stopping for lunch, and sprint straight to his room. He removed his clothes and jump straight into the bathroom, didn't even bother heating it.

He was taking a bath, playing with his rubber duck, Ducky. Then something heavy pressed against his chest, his back touched the bottom of the tub, his face followed. Paralyzed, he couldn't move, he felt the cold, then. With the last of his strength, he screamed for Mr. Ducky

Far Away

A good man, laid down

A grieving family, around him

And a grave

on it, the Epitaph said

"May his soul find peace, he was good man

Boring, but good

He doesn't deserve to die like this

A Death by Drowning

In his own Bathtub"

The last thing he remembered was the cold, no knife, nor bullets, not even a simple road accident.

It was the bath

"YOU TWAT, I KILL YOU!"

'Hey, hey easy, in my defense, both of your names were similar'

"You get me back, right now!"

'No can do, you died, your body is 6 feet under now, maggots just started crawling out of your eye socket'

Death finally took form, a giant scythe, a pair of skeletal hands, everything else hidden inside the dark robe. It was supposed to frighten him, but now he's just pissed.

'I could, however make it up to you'

"Fuck You"

'Another life? with an Eternal life? unlimited power? maybe a sprinkle of one true love?'

"Fuck you!"

'Know what, this is not up to debate, you will appreciate it sooner or later'. With a snap of his Ivory fingers, a black hole ripple opened, dragging the poor soul to a new life, bringing only his wits, his unstable hormones,and his everlasting regret of a tainted history. . . browser history.

'We will meet again unlucky one, in the near future. May you find comfort in your next life Uvuvwevwevwe Onyetenyevwe Ughwemuhwem Osas'

"SIMILAR!? THAT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE!"

He woke up at the side of the road, ragged clothes on his back, he was standing below a sign, a welcome sign to be exact.

His legs were frail, weak and thin. It felt like he spent an eternity in the damn Limbo. He pushed himself up, ignoring the dirt in his face. He could barely keep himself standing, it felt like it has been ages since his last meal. Eyes wondering aimlessly, he had no idea where he was.

After a moment, his nose started working again.

'Damn I need a ba- no no noo, no more bath'

He looked up to the sign, hopefully it would be something that will lift his spirits

'WELCOME TO GOTHAM' it said.

He might as well go to hell.