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MHA: Not the Greatest Hero

Anime & Comics
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Zusammenfassung

Araki's journey on becoming a hero, but for what purpose? My Hero Academia Alternate Universe(AU) so if there are plot holes, you can either say it or ignore it. Accepting nice criticisms since I am a new writer. Cover picture isn't mine. If the owner is there please message me if I can't use it. MHA isn't mine. (Obviously)

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Chapter 1*Introduction*

This is my very first novel so if you have criticisms, please say it. Make it logical and simple as possible.

This isn't a harem, not reincarnated mc, and romance is just teenagers teasing each other except maybe side character romance. MC romance might appear only in the end.

English isn't my first language so kindly point out the mistakes.

Spoilers: Some characters might have slight changes with their quirks and skills like Kaminari, wherein he can now use his electricity in his body. Midoriya knows some self-defense and slight martial arts. Tomura with very agile body. (He is agile in canon but very frail so it isn't noticable.)

This isn't a wish fulfillment story so if you are one of those people that likes that kind of story, this might not be for you.

Updates may vary since I'm not that productive and I hope this new hobby of mine can make me more hard-working than I currently am.

I might edit this from time to time if needed so...

The uploads on first few chapters might be weekly or so because I'm still new and my drafts are still few. I might bulk it up first then try regular uploads but no promises.

If you see some attacks from other anime, I just use it as a reference. It doesn't mean the MC knows the anime nor the anime exist in the MHA world I use as a setting.

For example... giving example would be a spoiler.

Edit: There won't be much flashy action scene at the first arcs.

Edit 2: Please don't put a dumb review. e.g. "HAREM?HAREM?HAREM?" or "good good good good good" or whatever then 5 star it. I'd rather take a 1-star review that says how and where they think I go wrong. Although the story only have 2 reviews at the moment, I hope next people reading this would do so as said.

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Spirits_everywhere
Spirits_everywhereLv4

Since you're accepting nice criticism, here I go writing an essay once more: Writing Quality: 5 stars. There are hardly any errors in sentences, making it good and very fluent to read. Sentences are smooth, paragraphs are spaced out properly, making it neat and easy on the eyes. The chapters are also of appropriate length (if I estimate properly, it should be around 1.5k words? Correct me if I'm wrong), and if this quality is maintained, it could be considered a "good" fanfic just based on writing quality. Stability of Updates: It's only 7 chapters, so I can't really judge based on that. So it's a mere 4 stars since author said weekly for now. It's not the best, but not the worst either. Story development: Once again, it's only 7 chapters, so I can't judge much. But based on what happens in 7 chapters, I can roughly guess the plot of which you are trying to bring across. It's nothing special, with some sort of passive-aggressive "revenge" (if you can even call it that) for his adopted grandfather's injuries. Unless you bring across more surprise other than just revenge, this would probably remain at 4 stars. These four stars also assume that you can properly weave in the MC's personal problems with the plot smoothly, and you're not just separating the two like oil and water. Otherwise, this drops to 3 stars. However, if you manage to weave in your own (unique) plot along and with your MC's problem, and not just follow canon, this can go up to 4.5 - 5 stars. Character design: So far, it feels rather bland. I mean, his personality is indifferent, from what I see (others may find different), and while that gives off the cool, silent type vibe, it doesn't give a lot of "feel" to the characters. Why do you think most Shounen actions manga/anime has a hot-blooded MC? It's because it gives off a lot more "life" to the story. The silent/cool MC usually remains as the side character. I'm not saying that it is bad or anything, but it's just a lot harder to develop a cool mc, and if you're the first-timer you said you are, you might find a problem trying to find a good development for your mc, whether in his thoughts or behaviors. Most of the other characters are also not really talked about, which is understandable since it's just mostly canon events, but I hope in the future that you will properly develop them. It doesn't matter whether or not your readers know about them beforehand, it still does some good (mainly for you, though) to get to know them personally when writing them rather than just reading from a manga. It will also help you develop more types of personalities you could write if you're planning to write even more books after this. Therefore, this is also four stars for now. World Background: This is fanfiction; most of the background have already been properly developed by their original authors. So automatically 5 stars. But if you're asking for how well you have developed the world background, I would give it a 4. You didn't give the world background all at once, which is a good thing. The clues that you drop here and there acts as good appetizers for your readers to continue reading on. However, it's really too sparse. If I didn't know MHA when I read this, I would be curious, but I would be equally lost until you finally develop it properly. Conclusion: In the end, this isn't really a criticism, so to speak. Generally speaking, this story definitely has potential when developed properly. To be completely honest, my writing style is completely opposite from yours. While yours tend to drop clues here and there as you immediately get on with the main cast, I develop mine very slowly, starting from childhood, to middle school, to finally high school. I have tried writing an MHA fanfic as well, and while I have a lot of supporters, I know that I could do a lot better. So here is a tip for you - go and read other mha fanfictions for ideas and development. THE TRIALS: Path Toward Godhood is a good one that I really love, so you can go ahead and give it a shot as well. 4.4 stars is a rather average rating that I would give. But then again, it's only 7 chapters so far. The future is for you to create. Perhaps I will come back and review once more chapters have been published,

Nyareh_Grant
Nyareh_GrantLv4

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