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Living The Cliche Life

Your run of the mill Multiverse story with a "Rudimentary System" and a main character that can't make up his mind. This fanfic can be counted as wish fulfilment. This fanfiction is now officially a crack fic because I can't write serious stuff

TurkishJesus · Anime und Comics
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70 Chs

Prologue: Cliche Prologue Is Cliche

Prologue: Cliche Prologue Is Cliche

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Here I am in this white void floating like I am in some kind of liquid alongside a elderly dude I will presume God for my sanity's sake, wondering how the hell did I got myself killed...

"Alright young man that's enough inner monolouge, as you can guess I am a higher being you can think of me as god, God, deadpool or whatever you want to believe in I don't care but as you can guess you have died.

You have two choices in front of you, either you go to after life or exchange your accumulated karma whether good or bad for a fortune wheel and a reincarnation ticket on the side."

Hearing this I stopped to think for a minute "Well, I wasn't even 30 yet and I honestly don't feel like going to after life which I am pretty sure I am not going to heaven, so how many turns my life is worth?"

"That's the spirit! Also your life worths three turns but you only get two due to special circumstances." God informs me, honestly I am afraid to ask but my curiosity got the better of me.

"Why, what happend to the thrid one?" I ask with a hesitant voice.

"Do you really want to know?" I am not sure if I saw right but he was amused for a second.

"Well, unless it's not going to cost me, sure." After I said that a TV popped out of the somewhere and started showing the last hour of my life from an outsider point of view.

"Ehh why do I look like I am high and why am I outside, didn't I die at the office party?"

"Well, they brought some drugs into the party to make things wilder."

"Any notable moments?"

"Except your death, none." So here I am watching myself roaming around clearly high as hell, quoting Doctor Who for some reason and my gaze suddenly locks onto a homeless kid crossing the street and boy if I didn't know myself I would have called FBI after seeing that expression.

I don't know what the high version of me was thinking but he stopped the kid in the middle of the street, poor kid was terrified as far as he knows I am a "junkie" and I just continued my quoting.

"It all just dissapears doesn't it? Everything you are, gone in a moment like breath on a mirror. Any moment now he's coming." at this point I am face palming, this is it I am never getting high or drunk in the future.

"Wh- who's coming?" Kid looks like he's about to piss himself. It's sad to watch to be honest.

"The Truck! The truck is coming!" As if on cue a truck appears in the distance, aproaching with no intentions of stopping since it's driver is sleeping and that did it kid tried to escape but for some reason I didn't let him go.

"Hey! Let that kid go!" Some pedestrians finally noticed something amiss.

"Someone call the police!"

"Sir, please let me go!"

"I will always remember when the... Wait I am not a doctor, that means you're not my companion SCRAM!" I don't how where I found enough strenght to throw the kid to the other side of the street but I did and the kid hit the wall and he stopped moving, I honestly don't know if he survived.

"Jesus! He threw the kid catch him!"

"Kid has a bleeding someone call an ambulance!"

While they were hoping to catch me they realized that I wasn't running away and I was still on the course of the truck, I just turned towards the crowd and gave my best smile.

"Say no to drugs kids."

*Slam*

-One cringe session later-

"Are you okay kid?"

"Yeah, but why did I lose a turn there?"

God coughed to his fist and spoke the words that made me sink into despair. "That kid was going to cure cancer."

"Hold up! That kid died!?"

"Yeah..."

"Give me a second."

-One prayer for salvation later-

"Yeah, I am ready now."

"Well, you didn't have to pray but whatever let's start, let the wheel of fortune decide your fate!" At God's call a small desk sized wheel of fortune appears.

Seeing my dumbfounded expression God got angry and yelled indignantly. "What!? You thought it would be bigger?"

"Perhaps..."

"Hmph previous wheel was gigantic but the last idiot I sent to reincarnation asked if I am compensating hmpf! Now he is compensating in hell."

"Ok that went from zero to hundred real fucking fast.Can we just start?"

"Sure but let me ask first, do you want to get rate up on OP Systems at the cost of one of your turns."

Hearing this I couldn't help but reply "Rate up is a lie and you know it let's start."

Saying this I turned the wheel and turned my head away to minimize the disappointment I am bound to live through.

*ding*

"Well, it's Occlumency from HP for your first turn." Not bad I gues... Although I don't know where I will be going for reincarnation so it might be useless. Shaking my head I turned the wheel again.

*ding*

"Demonic Art: Soul Refinery..." God announced, he seemed surprised by the result as well.

"I was aware that you might not really be the God but isn't this a bit on the nose because that screams Evil with capital E..."

'God' Shrugged. "Hey I will let you go at it one more time I assume you don't want to be hunted by so called divine beings just because you have this."

Hearing this I let out a relieved sigh and turned the wheel again, I don't care what other people might say but I am not touching anything labelled as Demonic.

*Ding*

"Well, I'll be damned aren't you lucky. It's a Rudimentary System. It's not OP or anything it just has Inventory, Status and World Travel."

I just nodded but didn't answer since I was inspecting the system, I am really looking forward to leaving this place also I didn't ask if he has plans for my soul later on, not like he is going to answer truthfully but lets hope I am not being prepared for his dinner.

(He is not going to fight his ROB or anything, I just wanted to express that MC is aware how fishy this whole thing is looking)

"Is there conditions for World Travel just in case I end up in a messed up world?"

"No worries, your first world is chosen by me so it's not that powerful compared to what's out there in the multiverse, System World Travel is random but let's you travel whenever you want."

"Oh where I am going? Please don't tell me it's Harry Potter." I did get Occlumency after all but I don't remember anything useful from the books and if you think I am going in some universe completely blind then you're dead wrong.

"No, it's too over done and you'll ruin it, also about where you're going you will see once you reach there now SCRAM!"

Hearing his shout I used World Travel on instinct and gone through the reincarnation. I don't even know how I did that!

"That idiot forgot that I was going to send him...Well, whatever I will just send him his reincarnation ticket once he awakens, maybe another gift on the side, after all I wouldn't be a loving father if I didn't give my son some gifts."

I am hoping to write something that doesn't look like I was high while writing it but it's not looking promising.

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