Chapter 4 Stay away from me

*I don't know why I feel this way, my heart wants it but my brain is against it. My body longs for it so bad but my mind is fighting this reality.* Kim's confused mind thought staring at Soren's face and body over him. His gaze pierced through Kim's mind, body and soul, Kim definitely wanted to explode with the feeling in his chest but he was scared of the bare faced handsome man over him

"Senior Soren. Go to bed." He said wanting to pull closer to Soren but fighting his urge.

"You pathetic little thing. My feelings are a joke?" Soren asked angrily

*Why is he mad at me?* Kim asked himself unsure of what Soren meant.

"You lied. You lied from the beginning, you never loved me. Get out! Get out this instant Ryan!" Soren fired at Kim.

"I'm not Ryan. Wake up" Kim replied scared of the drowsy Soren. He bent down releasing Kim and started to tear up.

"Because of you, I've kept a distance. I'm stuck to this stupid mask cause of my self hatred. I'm obsessed with things I'm not to obsess about . I'm scared I'd be more afraid cause if I loosen up my grip you'll overlook me." Soren continued crying hard trying to breathe between his tears.

*He was hurt. He's in pain, I don't like you sad Senior.* Kim thought as he pulled Soren in and gave him a warm hug.

"It's okay, I'll listen if you want. You can be possessive if you want. It's the world that has a problem not you. They fail to understand that you have emotions to deal with too. They are selfish." Kim said patting his hair and recalling how everyone had treated him at the orphanage, everybody acted like they were forced to put up with him. He wasn't a monster but they treated him like one, they were the real devils.

Soren fell asleep after crying a bucket of tears and Kim only managed to drag him up his bed and cover him with a blanket

"Don't be sad, I can't get that sadness out of my head." Kim said admiring Soren's sleeping face

........................................

*Arrgh.... My head* Soren's head rang immediately he woke up

"It hurts so much" He exclaimed rubbing his head then he realized he was dead drunk at the bar.

"Shit! How'd I get here?" He shouted again in shock. He quickly touched his face and realized his mask was on.

"Whew. Thank goodness" He felt relived then he noticed someone peacefully sleeping beside his bed.

*Why is he here?* He asked himself staring at Kim's face.

"Hey! Get up!" He shouted waking Kim.

"Mmmhn you're awake" Kim said sleepily rubbing his eyes.

*What the heck!? Why is he so cute!?* Soren asked himself irritated and angered by seeing Kim being all cute while sleepy.

"Stay away. Did you see my face?" He shouted.

*I knew he'd be bothered if I see the face he tries hard to hide. He probably is still holding his pain I don't want to make him sad or angrier than he already is.* Kim thought recalling his behavior the previous night.

"No, you wouldn't go near me. I was just worried so I slept here" Kim finally said after intensely staring into Soren's eyes.

"Good. Now shat the fuck away from me!" Soren shouted ignoring his headache.

"Don't you have class?" He asked again.

"Not until later today. Should I order you something for your hangover?" Kim replied getting up to fold his beddings on the floor.

"No! Just get out. I need my personal space." Soren replied storming off into the bathroom.

*Why does he hate me so much?* Kim asked himself pouting in sadness and anger.

...........................................

"Why do you keep zoning out today Kim?" Mei asked after seeing Kim was staring at the empty space and not the book he opened to read.

*He must've been hurt by someone he really trusted. But still he doesn't need to hate me that much* Kim thought not even listening to Mei.

"Hey!" Mei shouted as he finally jerked back to reality.

"Uhh? Wh...what?" Kim asked scared of the authoritative voice that called his name.

"Does Soren bully you?" She asked again.

"N...No" He replied recalling when Soren's body was above him. His face slightly turned pink just from remembering Soren's body.

"You've seen his face right? He's your roommate. Is he handsome?" Ivy asked after applying lip gloss.

Kim recalled his really handsome face and blushed harder. Of course he couldn't tell them about what happened last night and how handsome Soren looked.

"N..no" He hesitantly replied.

"What kind of guy is this? He's a big psycho I don't like him" Chon butted in still texting his female friends.

"He's actually really nice." Kim answered smiling sheepishly

"Why are you all red. Do you like him?" Ivy asked flaunting a dirty smile.

"You're crazy!" He shouted nervously.

"Woah, take it easy there" Ivy replied loosing her smile.

"Wh...what does it mean to want someone's scent?" Kim asked after the long silence.

"Wow! That's a really direct and cool pickup line. Why, did someone tell you that?" Mei asked absorbed in her book.

"What? No! I'm asking for my friend" He lied trying to hide his flushed face behind his book.

"You have panic attack around strangers, How'd you get another friend?" Mei asked in curiosity finally dropping her book.

"Just so so." Kim replied acting like he was really reading.

"He probably wanted to have an intimate relationship." Ivy replied dropping her mirror.

"Could you guys keep it down? I wanna record a voice message." Chon snapped irritated by their discussion.

"Hey isn't that Senior Soren?" Ivy asked pointing to Soren and his friends who were walking down the stadium. Kim was excited but shy at the same time. He went ahead to walk up to catch up with Soren to hand him a bottle of water.

"Senior Soren." He called stretching the water to him.

"Woah, Soren is really popular. Look at this cute boy giving you water." Aldo said as the trio burst into laughter.

Soren didn't like their loud laugh at all and was bothered by how Kim had approached him.

"Stay away from me!" He snapped and walked away leaving everyone in shock.

*Why...why is he like that?* Kim asked himself with a deep cut of sadness on his heart.

"That jerk." Jack cursed as they all walked up to catch up with Soren,

"He's crazy. Ignore him Kim." Mei comforted glaring at Soren's back view.

"I..I want alcohol." Kim announced shocking Chon, Mei and Ivy.

*I can talk back. It's a confidence boost isn't it?* He thought