241. The War Part I

"MAHARLICA AND AMERICA HAD ENTERED A WAR BECAUSE OF MAHARLICA'S NEW PRESIDENT, AUSTRALIAN PRESIDENT DIRK DAWSON, DECIDING TO WAGE WAR AGAINST AMERICA!!!SEVERAL AMERICAN CITIES WERE BOMBED BY THE MAHARLICAN PLANES WHICH JUMPSTARTED THE WAR!!!"

Miguel, with teary eyes, watched in horror, that even though he had given up, people who believed in his cause still fought against America and waged war... Miguel's actions still, in the end, had consequences.

Dark, Hercules, and Yuki meet the President, Doughnut Trumpet. Behind Trumpet is the American flag, beautiful as ever.

"You framed Maharlica by having your men steal planes and bomb your own cities!" yelled Dark, pointing his katana at the President. "You call yourself the fucking President, Trumpet!?."

"Call me... Mr. President..." sneered Doughnut.

"Why are you doing this? Innocent people were killed by those airstrikes! Why!?" asked Hercules, angrily.

"Because the world that Miguel created... is dangerous... and it needs to be destroyed... This so-called perfect world that JoJo created will merely destroy the very foundation of sovereignty and nationalism."

"This isn't right!"

"There is no such thing as a concept of right and wrong... Dark... There is only the weak and powerful... The weak have to stay weak and the strong have to stay strong... Because if you take away that sovereign balance and turn the world equal, the world will break... Because... this world? It was already broken ever since cavemen began drawing on fucking walls. You can't force a world to immediately unite as one!Cultures will clash!Everyone will kill each other because everyone is different, Dark!I'm simply trying to save the world from Miguel JoJo!After I blow up a few more cities, Maharlica will be forced to break into its original nations."

"There is another way!" yelled Dark.

"And how is that?"

"We...! Uh... Federalism!" yelled Dark. "We could turn each country and other regions into smaller federal states in this Empire!"

"That will take too much time!"

"Not unless each state has a governor and its own council..."

"But nationalism... PATRIOTISM!!! It will disappear from the face of this Earth! All of the things every single thing every person in history built will be for nothing! What flag will the people follow!? A colonizer's!? America-!"

Doughnut's Stand begins to emerge from his body. It's a top hat on his head. "I'm trying to make America GREAT AGAIN!!!" His voice boomed and echoed in the hall.

"No one... No one ever told you about your father..." sneered Doughnut.

"What? You're my father?"

"You don't know! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I've told JoJo... I guess... he was trying to protect your morale..."

"What!?"

"You're a splice, Dark!"

"A what!?"

"You're like me... We're both splices..."

"What the fuck's a splice!" yelled Yuki.

"Salvi's genetic code was once combined with different women by Dr. Voodoo's magical cloning spell in the hopes that they create the perfect successor for Salvi... Salvi never fucked! Except with Clara a hundred years ago... Salvi cloned himself, dumbass!!!"

"Wait... I'm a-..." Dark began to cry.

"That's right... Neither of us has any purpose..." sneered Doughnut. "We're throwable... tossable... We..."

"I'm a clone..." Dark knelt down.

"Ex-fucking... sactly..." sneered Doughnut. "WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!Those people you fought? They're just like you... Clones looking for a purpose... I cloned them from the bones of already dead people from their graves... And created purposeless bodies... soldiers that I needed..."

"You're... You're awful..." sobbed Dark. "YOU'RE A-!!!"

"I am not a monster... I'm just doing what is best for the United Goddamned States of America.I... AM... MR. PRESIDENT!!!"

He snaps his fingers as several soldiers swing into the windows through ropes and shoot at Dark. Dark blocks all the bullets with his katana.

"Shit!" whispered Dark.

The soldiers corner them in the wall.

"Get behind me!" yelled Hercules.

Dark and Yuki went behind Hercules and hid from the agents and soldiers who shot at them. The bullets bounced off of Hercules' skin.

"GODDAMN IT!!!" yelled Dark, as he carved a portal on the wall. Dark and Yuki crawl inside.

Hercules sighs and blasts electricity at all of the men and women, blowing each of them up.

Dark then hopped on the walls and cut through all the soldiers in a split second. Yuki did so, too. The trio killed several soldiers and agents in the white house alone.

*RATATATATATA*

Suddenly, the Stand-User who wields Gray Tower, Adrian Lincoln, AKA Captain Star-Spangled, blasted his machine gun at Dark. Dark blocks all the shots with his katana as his katana glowed red and vibrates.

Dark rolls around and hides behind a desk. A soldier appears with a dagger and stabs Dark's shoulder, as Dark headbutts the soldier and opens the desk, seeing a pen in it. The man screams as Dark puts the pen in his open jaw and slams his chin shut, as the pen pokes out of his inner chin.

"MMPH!!!"

*drip... drip...*

Dark then cuts the man's head off as he hid behind the desk again.

Yuki, meanwhile, fought against the User of Gray Tower, Captain Star-Spangled.

"Aren't you the Superhero from the news?" asked Yuki. "I used to have action figures of you as a child, bruv!"

Captain Star-Spangled sighed and blasted shots at Yuki, who does a backward handspring and tossed a shuriken into the man. The man simply bites the shuriken and spits it on the ground.

"Oh fuck... Lad, you've got a nice jaw, there... Haha..."

Captain Star-Spangled blasted his machine gun at Yuki, who teleported away into her shadow on the ground.

Hercules charges in as he electrocutes another soldier's face. The man's face explodes as Hercules drops his body.

*BANG*

A soldier shot at Hercules' face, but the bullet bounces off.

"Guys... I really don't wanna do this, okay?" Hercules asked politely.

The soldier kept on shooting at Hercules' face as Hercules headbutts the woman's head open as her brains splatter all over.

"I'm so sorry, Ma'am..." sighed Hercules.

Dark, meanwhile, cut through seven soldiers in three seconds as he spun and twirled around, dodging bullets and slicing their body parts with relative ease. "CONSECUTIVE MOON SLASHES!!!" yelled Dark, blasting his blade at them over and over as twelve more soldiers were cut to pieces. "WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!"

A man goes up behind Dark as he strangles Dark. Dark, who faces the wall, runs upward and up the ceiling. Dropping behind the man, Dark breaks the man's arms and snaps his neck.

*SHING*

Dark's eyes widen as he hears a familiar blade. He turns around to see Rojo once more.

"Kid..." Dark's eyes quivered.

Rojo, now armless, bit his katana's holder. He simply growled at Dark.

Dark spun and slashed his katana toward Rojo, but Rojo blocks it with his own. The two clash swords as Dark slashed his left and right, but Rojo blocked it all, even managing to kick Dark in the chest as Dark tumbled backward and hissed.

Yuki, meanwhile, blasted her katana at the Superhero, but he simply dodged as her katana gets stuck on the wall.

He shoots at her, but she teleports away almost immediately.

"KILL THOSE TERRORISTS!!!" Mr. President's voice echoed in the halls as a bazooka's missile is shot at Yuki.

Hercules blocks the bomb using his chest.

"Thank God for your pecs, bruv!" laughed Yuki.

"I DO NOT CONSENT TO THAT COMMENT!!!" yelled Dark.

"I'm free to masturbate, too! Feminism, asshole!"

"THAT'S NOT HOW FEMINISM WORKS, YOU IDIOT!!!"

Captain Star-Spangled shoots at Yuki as Dark stabs Captain Star-Spangled in the chest. Dark takes off the man's mask.

"ABRAHAM LINCOLN!?" Dark asked out of horror.

"Adrian Lincoln..." corrected Star-Spangled, vomiting blood.

"You're a clone!?"

"Yeah... Oh... the irony... Killed by a colored man..." Adrian drops dead as another missile is launched toward Dark.

"AMERICA WILL RECONQUER THE MIDDLE EAST AND REGAIN THEIR POWER ON LATIN AMERICAN COUNTRIES TO SAVE IT AFTER ALL THIS!!!" howled a soldier.

Dark immediately decapitated the soldier. "God, Soldier! Get out! Well... I just decapitated you, so... You're already out. Ngahahaha..."

A laser is pointed at Dark's forehead as Dark slashes a portal out of the sky and crawls inside.

Dark teleports to every sniper and decapitates each of them.

"GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!" Dark laughed and pointed his katana upward. "END THIS WAR, ASSHOLE!!!"

Trumpet cackles on a helicopter. "WARS MAKE NATIONS, ASSHOLE!!! WHY DON'T YOU STUPID FILIPINOS REALIZE THAT!?"

"GO FUCK YOURSELF!!! YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER QUEEN OF ENGLAND!!!"

"HOW DARE YOU!!! OH!!! IT'S ON!!! AS THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, I ANNOUNCE THAT WE ARE NOW AT WAR AGAINST DARK AND HERCULES!!!"

"WHAT ABOUT ME, WANKER!?" asked Yuki.

"You're a Brit, so we can't really fight you," said Mr. President. "I still have an image, you know! No! Wait! I don't! I just won't because you're a woman. AHAHAHAHA!!! ALL HAIL AMERICA!!!"

Several soldiers shot at Dark as Dark cuts them with relative ease. "WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!"

A cyborg clone of Theodore Roosevelt then drops from the sky and shoots at Dark. Dark then sighs. "Okay... Now, this is hard... You discharged black soldiers in a riot... But you freed my country... Okay... Wait... Goddamn..."

*SHOO*

*BOON*

*SPLAT*

Dark gasps. "ALAN!!!" he smiled.

Theodore's clone blows up into pieces.

Alan Wilson drives a helicopter and shot missiles at several helicopters into the white house.

"STOP BLOWING HOLES IN MY GODDAMNED HOUSE!!!" yelled Mr. President. "DAMNED TERRORISTS!!!"

"By God is that word overused!" yelled Dark. "What!? Am I a terrorist for preventing the third World War?"

"YOU'RE A TERRORIST BECAUSE YOU'RE STANDING ON MY GODDAMNED LAWN HAVING YOUR FRIEND BLOW HOLES IN MY HOUSE YOU FILTHY BROWN SAUSAGE!!!"

"HE IS NOT A BROWN SAVAGE!!!" yelled Hercules.

"NO, HERC!!! HE CALLED ME A SAUSAGE... PRACTICALLY... HE CALLED ME A PENIS!!! WHAT YOU THINK HE CALLED ME IS A BIT... IT'S A BIT WORSE, BUD!!!"

"WHAT!? I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!"

"God-!" Dark teleports next to a soldier and decapitated him, stealing his machine gun and slaughtering several soldiers. "WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!"

Doughnut sighs and points at Dark. "Soldiers." He spoke to the radio. "All your launchers at that man with the fedora."

"But sir... That's a war crime!" yelled a soldier.

"I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!!! I'M TRYING TO SAVE THE WORLD HERE!!!"

*SHOO SHOO SHOO SHOO SHOO*

Dozens of missiles were launched toward Dark.

*zim*

Dark teleports around the helicopters and decapitates each of the drivers of the helicopters as each of these helicopters explode.

The last helicopter, that held the President, flew above Dark.

"MOVE AROUND!!!" yelled Mr. President. "I THINK HE HAS A HARDER TIME ENTERING MOVING OBJECTS!!!"

The helicopter moves away from its spot as Dark ends up teleporting to the spot where the helicopter was as he drops from the sky almost immediately. "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!"

Dark howls in fear as he dropped from the sky.

Yuki teleports and grabs him as she teleported into the shadow realm.

She lands on his chest.

"Hello," she turned red.

"Hi," sneered Dark.

"Cheerio." Yuki teleports both of them into different areas. She teleports back into the white house to fight off Rojo. Dark teleports into the helicopter and battles against Mr. President.

"WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!" yelled Dark as he lunges his sword toward Mr. Prseident.

Mr. President dodges and orders his soldiers to shoot at Dark. Dark carves a portal in Mr. President's torso and enters as the soldiers stop shooting.

"FUCK!!!" yelled Mr. President. "Wait! Wait! He's inside me! NONE OF YOU IDIOTS SHOOT!!!"

Dark teleports from each of the soldier's backs and stabs each of their heads.

"GODDAMN IT!!!" growled Mr. President. "RAUGH!!!" He pushes Dark off the helicopter as he leaps upward and grabs Dark.

"OH MY GOD!!!" Dark yelled in fear. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"

Suddenly, a net is unfolded below them as they safely land on it.

"What... What's your ability?" asked Dark, noticing that no civilian is running away from whatever the hell this is.

"How come nobody is running away from us right now?" asked Dark, squinting his eyes.

"You fuckin' idiot..." sighed Mr. President. "I'm trying to save this world from JoJo! Don't you see? I AM THE PRESIDENT OF AMERICA!!! AMERICA IS MEANT FOR SOMETHING GREAT!!! THIS IS IT!!! THIS IS THE TRUE VILLAIN!!! MAHARLICA!!!"

"You're trying to keep this country from disappearing, huh?" sighed Dark. "You're scared... that everything you worked for... will be taken away from you?"

"You'll never understand!"

"Believe me... I know what it's like to be afraid to lose your purpose... I know! But... That doesn't mean you have to start a war! The war's been going on for three days now... And millions have been killed... Most of which are from your country alone! America can't fight the rest of the world... You can't fight the rest of the world... Not alone..." Dark shook his head.

"What has this stupid world ever done for you!?"

"Nothing," laughed Dark. "Nothing at all!"

"Then why do you fight for it!?"

"Same reason why you fight for your country... We're enemies because we chose to be these people... We chose our sides... We're doing this for our country... For the good people in our countries..."

"Oh... the irony... That two misfits decide the fate of this world..."

"You? A misfit?"

"Yeah..." laughed Mr. President. "I was nobody... Experimented by the government... taught to be the perfect role model... They found that I was a suitable host for the Standoids... The virus that created the various Stand-Users you and the JoJo family faced... I didn't inherit a Stand like Salvi... So I was stabbed by the arrow. The others... The other splices... They weren't strong enough... So they died... The two of us... We're going to be the last American legends... Two heroes who fought each other... both fighting for the blessed American Spirit."