189. Their Hopeless Opus

"Good thing we got the ears just in time!" laughed Reigen.

Everyone stares at Reigen.

"Oh! Forgive me!" yelled Mob. "This is my master... Reigen Arataka."

"So... you're supposed to be a psychic, hm?" asked Vegeta, leaning before him. "Hoho! Very well! What am I thinking now? TELL ME!!!"

"Uh..." said Reigen.

"Well!? SPEAK UP, PSYCHIC!!!"

Vegeta gorges on some pretzels Giorno made.

"You're sexually frustrated?"

Everyone is grossed out by this statement.

"What!?" asked Vegeta. "I'm sorry!?"

"He looks tired... meaning he has trouble falling asleep... Right now, he's overeating those weird pretzels... Also... He snaps easily... it's the only conclusion... Right!?"

"NO I'M NOT!!! HAHAHAHA-!!!" Vegeta leans closer. "Tell me on what I need to do, oh wise one," Vegeta whispered.

"Seems legit," shrugged Josuke.

"Well... I can't say no to that," said Giorno.

Jotaro squints his eyes. "Hm..."

Reigen looks at Jotaro from top to bottom. "Geez! Friend, you need some sleep, don't you? You've been stressing about something... or someone... Did you lose a relative? Or are you worried about someone?"

"Hm... Impressive..." said Jotaro. "My wife and daughter are kept hostage by DIO. We could use a psychic like you in our team..."

"Oh... I see..." said Reigen. "Welp! I guess it can't be helped!"

"Oy... Josuke!" smiled Okuyasu. "Wanna play that game we made?"

"Sure!" smiled Josuke.

"What else do I need, Wise One?" asked Vegeta.

"A massage and a nice hot sponge bath..."

"THIS MAN IS KILLING IT!!!"

Jotaro sighs. "Well... I can't help but feel that something wrong is going to happen soon..."

Mini-Chapter I: Josuke and Okuyasu's Videogame

Koichi, Giorno, Mista, Gappy, Yasuho, Trish, and Shigeo all play Josuke and Okuyasu's video game using multiple controllers. The animation is High Definition and the screen is beautiful.

"Oi... Joke," said the handsome muscular man, turning to his partner. "Let's go kill some aliens, bro."

"Bro, hell yeah," smiled Joke. "I'd do anything for you, Yasu!"

The group turns to Josuke and Okuyasu with weird expressions.

"Nani?" asked Josuke. "Why are you looking at us like that?"

"Josuke, I believe that this is just you and Okuyasu," said Giorno.

"Ha!?" asked Josuke, aggravated. "What are you talking about!?"

"I mean..." sighed Mista. "That guy... Joke... He has a pompadour... Same as your weird hair."

"HA!? WHOSE HAIR ARE YOU CALLING 'WEIRD,' JACKASS!?"

Mista does a halt gesture with both his hands as he laughs nervously. "Hahaha! Chill, dude! I was just saying that Joke's hair is weird."

"HA!?" asked Josuke.

"AHA!!! So Joke is you!" laughed Koichi.

"No, it's not!" yelled Josuke.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" laughed Yasuho. "That's so cute! Ahahahahaha!"

"Yasuho, you're being rude," sighed Gappy.

"Huh!? Oh! S-Sorry..." she bowed his head.

Gappy sighs. "Well... I mean... when someone makes a story, I guess it makes sense for someone to base the main character of themselves... or at least the person they always wanted to be."

"That does make sense," sighed Okuyasu, brushing his chin.

"As long as you didn't add us in your weird game!" yelled Mista.

Josuke's eyes widen as he grabs the console and removes the disc.

"Hey!" yelled Mista.

"I think he added us in the game," said Shigeo.

Trish nods. "Uhn! Uhn!"

"Hmph!" yelled Josuke.

"Okay! We're sorry!" yelled Okuyasu.

"Who are we anyway?" asked Koichi.

"Koichi... You're the short guy who starts as a loser sex slave who soon becomes an awesome space knight who isn't afraid of losing to anyone!" smiled Okuyasu.

"H-Huh?" asked Koichi.

"Yasuho... You're the cute girl who ends up with th amnesiac Space Sailor. Trish! You're the totally hot girl with Daddy issues!" laughed Okuyasu.

"Oy! Okuyasu!!!"

"Mista! You're the unlucky sniper! Shigeo, you're the loser who doesn't have any friends but blows up with emotion when angered! Giorno is the cold and unappealing weirdo who wants to kill the Mafia Boss. you receive a quest from him to kill the boss. Jotaro-san is a marine biologist who is a terrible father! Vegeta is the angry Prince who lost everything because of the Space Emperor. Goku is the hero of the story, but he's really dumb! Saitama is the depressed guy who is the strongest member! Polnareff is the weird ghost that lives in their spaceship!"

Everyone stares at Okuyasu and Josuke.

"I've been trying to stop you the entire time," said Josuke, facepalming. "But you just kept going... and... going..."

Everyone was mad at Josuke and Okuyasu after that. Josuke and Okuyasu decided to make a newer and better game...

Mini-Chapter II: New Gun

"Hey, Gunman!" laughed Vegeta.

Mista sighs as he cocks his revolver. "What!?"

"What did the cowboy say to the other cowboy?" asked Vegeta.

Mista squints his eyes.

"I missed you when you left college... But since you're back... I WON'T MISS YOU ANYMORE!!!"

Mista sighs.

"I WON'T MISS YOU ANYMORE!!!"

Mista shakes his head.

"Get it? Because they're cowboys and guns are stupid and cowardly," said Vegeta.

Mista sighs. "What do you want, Vegeta?"

"YEAH!?" asked No. 2. "What in the high-noon heck do ya want!?"

Vegeta sighs. "As much as you say how my daughter is dead to retaliate and as much as I often make fun of a dishonorable assassin like yourself... Here..."

Vegeta offers Mista a Special Ray Gun.

"This gun cannot be used to damage someone like Zen-Oh, but it sure is handy... It's called a Fortisite Blaster. It's a Ray Gun invented by the Fortisites that blast Ultra Spin bullets. The Bullets could be touch by Stands, I believe. It's also extremely fast and can break anything.It's the opposite of Ultra Instinct: Ultra Spin.Ultra Instinct acts as the ultimate form of defense, rooted in an energy force called Hamon. Ultra Spin is the ultimate form of offense, rooted in an energy force call Spin."

"You're giving me a gift?"

"Call it a peace offering or a gift... I don't care what it is... I just want you to know that Fortisite Blasters are far better weapons that can be used to kill gods."

Mista smiles. "Thanks. Oh... Here."

Mista hands Vegeta a picture of his family.

"How the hell-!?"

"I had Yasuho print an image from Mob who I had read your memories. We had a really long argument about reading people's minds... But then I told him what I was going to do with it. He agreed."

Vegeta sees pictures of a green-haired woman, a green-haired girl, and a purple-haired boy.

His eyes went teary and quivered.

"*ahem...* Thank you," said Vegeta.

"Y-You're welcome..." said Mista. The two looked away from each other.

Vegeta and Mista became less angry toward each other after that...

Mini-Chapter III: Giorno and Trish-First Date

"What's wrong?" asked Trish, sitting down with Giorno.

"Vegeta told me that iPhones are microwaveable..." Giorno said in frustration

"Oh. You fell for that, Giorno?" asked Trish.

Giorno points at the microwave, which blew up and Paisley Park is in the middle of fixing it.

"Ahahaha..." Trish laughed softly.

Giorno sighs. "What do you want, Trish?"

Giorno eats his pudding as he read the book, 'Les Miserables.'

"Oh! I was going to ask you out."

"Stand-User?"

"No... a date..."

Giorno halted before the spoon entered his mouth. He sets down his spoon.

"You are attracted to me?" asked Giorno.

"Yes," replied Trish.

Giorno sets the spoon on the bowl. "Tell me three things you consider that makes me the most attractive."

"You have a strong sense of family and justice. You're the reason why I can use Spice Girl and why I can defend myself. And you're hot."

"Blatantly honest there."

"So... Would you go out with me?"

Giorno bows his head. "I usually dislike women flirting with me. But good thing I don't see you as a woman."

Trish stares at Giorno. "What do you mean by that, exactly?"

"Very well," said Giorno. "We will have a date."

Trish brushes her chin. "What would you consider a date, Giorno?"

"I don't know. I've never done this before."

"Me neither."

"Isn't dating just hanging out to the point where you get to know the other party's traits to see if they're compatible with you?"

The pair thinks of a good way to spend time together.

"How about outside?" asked Giorno.

"Your father might end up catching and killing us."

"Living room?" asked Giorno.

The pair turns to the living room to see everyone gaming.

"No," said the pair.

"How about my bedroom?" asked Giorno.

Trish is dumbfounded by what Giorno just said. She just stared into space, dazing. "Huh?"

"What?" asked Giorno.

"HUH!?" Trish backed away and turned red. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU WERE TRYING TO DO WITH ME, YOU FILTHY MAN!?"

Giorno raises his eyebrow. "Eh? Che?"

"I mean... you are attractive and far better-looking than Mista."

Mista turns to her and paused their game. "Ha?"

"But I won't do it! I-I-I-I'm not ready!"

"Trish. Calm down."

"Ew! Ew! Ew! Thinking about someone else's lingering body heat unto mine."

"WHO'S FUCKING WHO!?" asked Vegeta. "I DECLINE because someone has to be a father here..."

"No one's doing anything with anybody," sighed Giorno. "Trish just overreacted."

"Okay... I don't really care... so..." Vegeta walks back into his room. "MASSAGE ME ONCE MORE, WISE ONE!!!"

"But I really want to play that game-!"

"How dare you! Can't you see that my nipples have hardened!? LOOK AT THEM, WENCH!!! LOOK AT THEM!!!"

"OKAY!!! SHEESH!!!"

*slam*

Trish stared at Giorno. "What were you planning to do?"

Giorno sighed.

Later...

Trish and Giorno watched the film 'Les Miserables.'

"I guess this is fine," said Trish.

Giorno and Trish made out a little but Trish got too excited and got embarrassed afterward. Giorno said the date was okay but Trish thought it was atrocious. They will continue dating only because Trish wants a better version of that date...

Mini-Chapter IV: Reigen- 21st Century's Greatest (Con) Psychic

"GODDAMN, MY BACK IS ACHING!!!" yelled Vegeta, as he lied on the massaging bed, facefirst. "Fix my back, oh Wise-One!!! This must be the work of EVIL SPIRITS!!! DO YOUR RITUAL AND HEAL ME!!!"

"I could see that you're having huge problems on your lower back."

Arataka Reigen. He is a conman who tells people who have ordinary problems that they are being attacked by Evil Spirits. He does, however, actually help them in the end. But if the creature is an ACTUAL evil spirit, he has Mob to take them out...

"This must be the work of an evil spirit..." Reigen brushed his chin. "NO MATTER!!! I'll save your ass from the evil spirit NO MATTER WHAT I DO!!!"

Reigen blasts his fists all over Vegeta's backside, back thighs, back legs, feet, and back arms. "SORCERY CRUSH!!! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA!!!"

Sorcery Crush. Reigen uses a massage to relieve the stress from physical fatigue and eliminates any stiff shoulders or back pains. This move proved very effective.

After that massage, Vegeta felt less stress in his backside...

"OH MY GOOOOOD!!!" yelled Josuke.

Reigen slammed the door open as the door hit Okuyasu in the face.

"WHAT IS IT!? IS THERE AN ENEMY STAND-USER!???"

"No..." said Josuke. "Okuyasu and I were taking videos with our new phone... and... a-and..."

Okuyasu grabs the phone and shows the video as Reigen sees a spirit begin them.

Reigen gasps. "I know how to fix this."

Reigen crushes the electronic with his elbow. "ELECTRONIC CRUSH!!!"

Electronic Crush. Reigen performs an elbow drop that makes electronics inaccessible.

"Whoa! Thanks for destroying the evilness in that phone, Reigen!" smiled Josuke.

"You're so cool!" smiled Okuyasu. "Gee... I wish i was psychic!"

"OH, COME ON!!!" yelled Yasuho.

Yasuho made yet another phone that day even after working on that microwave...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" yelled Goku.

"What is it!?" asked Reigen.

Goku points at a face on a painting he made.

"It's a painting," said Reigen.

The face winks at Reigen.

"OH... GOD!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

Reigen calmly breathes in and out. "Goku... I need a box and some tape."

"Ritual stuff... GOT IT!!!"

Goku gives him the stuff.

Reigen places the painting in the box and wraps it all over with tape.

"Get me Polnareff," said Reigen.

Polnareff runs into the ocean and tosses the painting down there. Reigen yells "DROWNING EXORCISM!!!"

Drowning Exorcism. Reigen puts a cursed object in a box, wraps it around with tape, and throws it into the ocean, never to be seen again.

The painting with a face was never seen again...

"Hey! Dark One! Would you save a dolphin or a matter baby!?"

"Dolphin." Jotaro walks away.

"Fuck..." Vegeta turns to Mista. "HEY, GUNMAN!!!" sneered Vegeta. "Would you run away from the number four or a matter baby!?"

"What's a matter baby!?"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" cackled Vegeta. "Nothing, baby! What's 'a matter' with you!? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

"PUN-chuh!!!" yelled Reigen, slamming his fist into Vegeta's face.

The PUN-chuh. A serious series punch that is used to hurt annoying people who make dumb jokes constantly, like a pun for example-... Oh, I get it. That's a dumb name, by the way.

Vegeta was forced to apologize to Mista afterward...

Mini-Chapter V: Goku, Vegeta, Saitama, and Mob Try to Figure It Out

"Kakarot, you idiot! What the hell are you doing?" asked Vegeta, seeing Goku, Saitama, and Mob staring at this picture stuck to a new door Polnareff made.

"Kakarot, you idiot! What the hell are you doing?" asked Vegeta, seeing Goku, Saitama, and Mob staring at this picture stuck to a new door Polnareff made"Hey, Getes! How many steps are you closer to Ultra Instinct?" asked Goku.

"None. How many gods have you defeated?" asked Vegeta.

Goku gives a "Bruh" expression.

Vegeta turns to the sign on the door.

"What... is that?" asked Vegeta.

"Maybe it's a secret door to another world..." smiled Goku.

"Or maybe... it's a door that will lead you to your fate," said Saitama.

"It could be... It could be anything I think..." said Shigeo. "The most beautiful thing could be behind that door."

"Imagine what power it holds..." sneered Vegeta. "In a way, I'd like to challenge it."

"Hmmmmm..." said all four.

"This must be some sort of ancient alien language," Vegeta squints his eyes.

"I got it! The symbols!" smiled Saitama. "It's a rewind and play button!"

"How come?" asked Shigeo.

"Explain, Bald One," Vegeta squinted his eyes.

"Look at the position of the triangles. One points to a circle and the other points away from another. The triangles look like play and rewind buttons!"

Goku gasps. "The future and the past! It's telling us... to move forward!"

"Oh my God..." said Vegeta. "You three idiots may be right. It's some sort of alien language telling us to move forward in our journey and save the people we love... and the rewind tells us to reminisce our pasts...My God..." Vegeta is moved to tears.

"This is the most beautiful thing ever!" wept Saitama.

Mob held his mouth, weeping.

Goku does a slow clap.

*clap... clap... clap...*

The others follow and applaud.

*clap clap clap clap clap*

*flush....*

They hear a toilet flushing behind the door.

The door opens and they see Okuyasu walk out of the door. "What the fuck are ya guys doin' staring at the door? Oh! You guys wanna go to the bathroom?"

Polnareff passes by and fixes the sign.

Polnareff passes by and fixes the sign"Oh..." said the four.

The four never spoke of that moment again...

Mini-Chapter VI: Gappy and Yasuho Reminisce

"Hey! Daddy!" smiled a little girl. "Let's go play on the beach!"

Gappy grabbed and held up a little green-haired girl.

"Hey! Daddy! Steal some of my hair and plant it in mom's face!"

Gappy's eyes quivered.

"Hey," said Yasuho.

Gappy sighs. "I miss her..."

Yasuho hugs Gappy. "I miss her, too, Josuke-kun..."

Gappy sighed.

"When I met you, I was an amnesiac who had no identity. With you, I found who I was... But with her, I found who I was meant to be..."

The pair hoped that they'd get their daughter back...

Mini-Chapter VII: Saitama and Shigeo are Opposites

Mob and Saitama stare at each other intently. Mob is holding a glass of milk.

Polnareff passes by.

"Uh... what the hell are you guys doing!?" asked Polnareff.

"I'm trying to search Saitama's mind for emotions," said Mob.

"Find anything?" asked Polnareff.

"Sadly... No. Not at all," said Mob.

Saitama bows his head with a saddened expression.

"It's okay," smiled Mob. "You'll feel something someday."

"I mean, Reigen said that you explode with emotions when you reach 100%. Why hasn't that happened yet?" asked Saitama.

"I just haven't gotten mad, yet, I guess."

"You sure are lucky, having that ability that relies on your emotions."

Mob looks at the glass of milk he is holding. "My emotions... I've always kept them intact to avoid hurting other people... I'm scared that if I break loose... and hurt someone...There's no going back.You're the one who's in luck, Saitama-san."

Saitama smiled softly. "You think I'm lucky? I wish..."

"Well... you have people who cared about you in your world, right?"

Saitama remembered Genos, Fubuki, Bang, King, Mumenrider... the others... He remembered his fellow Superheroes in his world.

"Yeah."

"I have people who care about me, too. I guess I could say we're both lucky!" smiled Mob.

Saitama smiled. "You're a nice kid, Mob."

Mini-Chapter VIII: Goku vs. Vegeta

Goku and Vegeta train in the anti-gravity room Yasuho developed for them. It is round in shape and has metallic tiles all over the room. The room had ten thousand times Earth's gravity.

Polnareff watched the pair fight it off.

"Why the hell are you watching us, French Swordsman!?" asked Vegeta.

Polnareff shrugs. "Giorno is dating Trish and Jotaro is... I don't know where he is, actually."

Goku and Vegeta pant as they get tired. Both are in their Super Saiyan Blue forms. Goku is in his Super Saiyan Blue Kaioken form. Vegeta is in his Super Saiyan Blue Evolution form. The pair are blasting their fists and their Stands fists at each other.

Polnareff sighs. "I don't get what you guys are still searching for."

"Power!" yelled the pair, as they continue to fight.

"I've trained for ten years and trained my Stand for 23 years," said Polnareff. "And here we are... Geez..." he sighed. "I really don't get it..."

"We don't either," said Vegeta. "It's... ecstasy. It's an addiction. It's an obsession to be stronger and gain more. The rush in our veins. The plasma in our blood. It's not just about pride... Not anymore. It's a Saiyan's drive! It's an obsession that no one understands! IT'S-!!!"

"It's exercise," said Saitama, eating a riceball. "But moving really fast and cool-like."

"Silence, Bald One," said Vegeta.

"He's not wrong," said Goku.

"Oof," said Polnareff.

Saitama continued to do basic training compared to Goku and Vegeta's spar training...

Mini-Chapter IX: Koichi and Guido Cook

Koichi and Guido cook some food.

"A Japanese-Italian restaurant? Koichi, you sly dog!" laughed Mista.

"Yeah! We could start up by thinking of some really good recipes!" smiled Koichi. "My girlfriend always wanted me to start a restaurant because apparently, I'm really good."

"That's pretty ostentatious of you," said Mista.

"Wait!" yelled Koichi, laughing softly. "I-I-I didn't mean that-!"

"But I get it! Let's start with a certain Italian meal for you... and a Japanese meal for me." said Mista.

"Huh?"

"It should make sense because if you want us to be working together in a restaurant of two different cuisines, both parties should understand the other's food."

"Oh! That makes sense!" smiled Koichi.

Later...

"Here's my version of Sashimi," said Mista.

"Huh?" asked Koichi, with a slightly frustrated expression.

"What!?"

"Sashimi is just raw salmon and all you did was slice it into pieces."

"Well!!! You cooked what!? Pesto!? That's just crushing pine nuts and basil with olive oil then adding that stuff to pasta!"

"That pasta is handmade!"

Mista sighs.

"Point taken... Wait! I have an idea!!! Give me a few minutes!!!"

Mista runs inside the kitchen once more.

Later...

The Sashimi is now on some strangely-made riceballs.

Koichi takes some chopsticks and takes a bite out of the raw salmon. "This is actually pretty good."

"I added basil and tomato juice to the sashimi."

"Huh!? then that's just Italian Sashimi!"

"Fine. Then make that pesto more Japanese!" yelled Mista.

Koichi thinks for a second.

Later...

Mista sees the Pesto, having barely changed. He takes a bite.

"Tastes different," said Mista. "Smells like a mountain forest compared to the spicy taste of basil..."

"I added Shiso leaves," smiled Koichi.

Mista points to Koichi. "I like the way you think."

Mista and Koichi planned their Japanese-Italian Restaurant...

Mini-Chapter X: Jotaro Meets...

Jotaro walks outside of the turtle to list down the alien Starfish with one eye on the ground. "Star Conqueror..." Jotaro wrote down.

Behind him, a familiar face floated down...

*dun dun dun dun dun dun dun... Rock Bottom... dun dun dun dun dun dun dun... Rock Bottom...*

"Hello..."

Jotaro immediately spun around and-...

"ORA!!!"

*POW*

He is not injured by Jotaro's punch at all. In fact, he tanked it. Star Platinum's fist is on this man's face. This man had a red costume with a yellow "U" at the center of his chest with a blue cape. He has white gloves and an eight-rayed sun at the back of his cape. He has a large bulky body with a handsomely chiseled face.

Jotaro squints his eyes. "Who the hell are you?"

"I am Stefan Rivers. I'm a Superhero in my world that they called... Unbreakable."

Stefan floated around Jotaro.

"What do you want?" asked Jotaro.

"I want what DIO wants. To save the world."

"He murdered trillions."

Stefan sighs. "Sure... Sure... He 'murdered' them. He's trying to make a new world, Jotaro. A new world where no one has to suffer any longer. A world where no one has to face the cruelty of God's hand."

Stefan floats before Jotaro and lands before him.

"A World Made in Heaven."

Jotaro sighs and backs away. "Yare yare daze..." he said. "You're a variant of that punk DIO worked with... Enrico Pucci..."

Jotaro felt a sharp pain on his face as he grunted.

"What's wrong?" asked Stefan. "Deja vu? As if you've felt something like this before... or somewhere in another... previous life... a previous Universe?"

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Jotaro backed away. "WHERE ARE MY WIFE AND DAUGHTER!?? WHERE ARE ANTONIA AND IRENE!??"

Stefan punched Jotaro once in the torso as Star Platinum blocked the attack, but his hand slipped and Jotaro was blasted into the jungle.

In the original JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Universe... here is the story...

Two stepbrothers. One was the biological son who lived a life full of luxury and fame, and the other always wanted the first's money that lived a cruel life with his own father. They grew up as brothers... but the other became a creature of the night... a Vampire... The first one was Jonathan Joestar, the first JoJo... and he fought DIO, his stepbrother... who wished to rule the world. He was decapitated but survived as ahead. He then killed Jonathan and ripped out Jonathan's head with his tentacles and stole Jonathan's body

Then... Joseph Joestar came... Joseph was the Grandson of Jonathan... and he killed the Vampire King...

Joseph soon grew old, and his daughter got sick. He enlisted the help of his friend and allies, including his grandson, Jotaro Kujo, to save Holy, who was cursed by DIO.

After killing DIO, Jotaro went on to continue protecting the world from supernatural events... This includes meeting Josuke Higashikata in Morioh to fight against Yoshikage Kira... and enlisting Josuke's friend, Koichi, to investigate Giorno Giovanna, the son of DIO, who battled against the Mafia who stole drugs to children.

Then, we meet Jolyne Kujo, who she and her father are cornered by DIO's final minion, Enrico Pucci, who successfully kills them and destroys the Universe to bring Heaven...

But Pucci died... and failed... instead, he created the Universe the new Jotaro Kujo belongs to...

This Universe has the same history, but Jolyne, his daughter, never existed and was replaced by a version of her, named Irene Kujo. This Jotaro Kujo is the Jotaro who stands before Stefan... The original Jotaro Kujo... is dead...

Jotaro stands up from the several trees that snapped in half. Star Platinum managed to break his fall. Jotaro struggles to stand again.

Stefan flies toward Jotaro. "Where are the others?" Stefan's eyes glowed brightly.

"They've run away... far from... here... to find... the last two parts..." Jotaro coughs blood. "You'll... never... find... them..."

"Let's see about that..." sneered Stefan.