Life Is Harder

Jenny's point of view..

   I got to the car and entered. I was aware of his stares on me but I don't give a damn about it anyway. I settled in and gestured for him to move the car and he did wordlessly.

   I did not get to see Reben Castle on our way here because I was asleep and I can tell you that what I am seeing, I am impressed with it. The hood is actually calm but there is no way I will compare it to my neighborhood.

   I kept looking at through the glass just to get my mind occupied, away from Zain. His thoughts had refused to leave my mind and I am not finding it funny. He can't stay in my mind when I can't have him. He has no right to remain in my head. If it's going to be this way for me then I would go insane before I leave here.

   I just hope for the will to overcome and not fall and fail my sister because it will hurt her if eventually I did not control myself and have an affair with her husband. Who in his or her right sense would do that? But then love makes you do insane things. It gives you reasons to be abnormal.

   If falling in love can be this hard then life is harder itself. I got loved by dad when he was alive and he promised that a man who would bring out the best in me and endure my craziness would find me. When I met Zain I thought he was the one, actually he was because he made me who I am in the bad way anyway yet I love that side of mine. I was me whenever I was with him. It's hard, it so hard to bare this hurt.

   My tears dropped and I wiped them off.

He can't be the reason I will be hurting everytime.

  We got to the mall twenty minutes later and I was expecting him to hand the money to me after packing for me to go get the items we need, rather he came down with me and instructed I go with him. I did not know the plans forming in his head but if he is thinking out of way then he should get read to see the beast in me.

   I followed him behind as we made our way into the mall.

"Welcome to Next Stores"

The security greeted us at the entrance and bowed.

"Thank you"

I responded on Zain's behalf and we walked inside.

   The mall is a very big one and I can swear down that things here are costly. I like the atmosphere and it's user friendly.

   The attendants smiled at Zain and I and I smiled back at them.

  Zain picked a basket which left me surprised. Anyone seeing both of us would think we are couple by how he was going about the whole thing.

   "Come in, let's go. Don't stand there staring"

He said casually and picked a paste. I obediently followed him to see how far this we go.

  "Don't be surprised that I do most of the shoppings. Your sis never come to the mall for a day to get things for home even before she was pregnant. I always do them and I never mind doing them so don't be surprised to know that I could get all that we need without you interfering. All you have to is follow me as I shop"

   He said.

"Was there a need for me to follow you here when you can actually shop?. I could have used this time I am here in this mall doing nothing to sleep and get some rest after a long journey. I don't know why you dragged me here to the mall to tell me that you can shop why I watch you, who does that?"

I screamed not minding that there are people around us.

    "Take care easy, you don't need to shout. We are in the mall."

   "And so what? What happen if we are the mall. Tell me Zain, why should I take it easy?. You think you can run my life for huh?"

  I was boiling with so much anger that I care less about my environment.

   "If you know what is good for you, you should not involve me in anything that has to do with you. Let me just make it clear to you in a language that you will understand. I'm here on my sister's accord not yours. So if there is anyone I am answerable to, it should be my sister. Since you could shop on your own, next time you go shop on your own or you let someone else take me"

    Zain stared at me after I was done talking and shook his head.

"Sorry miss, you can't tell me what to do. If I want you to stand why I eat, you do that because you are in my house. If you can't be on the same space with me, take a flight to hell"

He said and continued walking. I clenched my fist, looking for where to unleash my anger. 

   "Jenny, he is purposely doing this to annoy. Don't give him the satsifaction that he is getting into you. You are bigger than this"

My inner mind told me and I came back to my sense.

  "That's right, he knows what he is doing"

I breathed in then out and followed him. I promised myself just to watch him and say nothing. I can give silent treatment and when he realize that he failed in his attempt to get into my skin. He would stop trying.

   He seems to forget that it's me Jenny, the girl who doesn't care about anyone but herself. 

He continued to pick the items while I watch him silently. He was suddenly frowning after realizing that I was not angry. I smirked at him.

   "You can't get to me again,Zain. You can only try but won't succeed."