Chapter 1

What did I get myself into, this wasn't how life should have been. I met him during at a movie night at a friend's house, I remember how charming he looked in his brown check shirt. He has thick lovely curls and a wonderful glowing chocolate skin, his voice sounded smooth like honey when he said

"hello pretty lady, Nice to meet you."

It was the first time in a while that I had interest in someone, after I had left my last relationship I wasn't sure If I was ever going to find another person who'd make me feel this way. He didn't have much but I didn't care, I felt as we live together and start our family there was no way we would go through storms together and not succeed, he assured me and I trusted in him, oh what a fool I was.

We've been married for nearly 20 years now and not a day goes by without me feeling regret. How could I have been this foolish? Why didn't I see the signs? Who in the world did I marry? These are the questions I keep asking my self day in day out. From the moment I wake up to the moment I lay my head to rest.

"Should I just kill myself or perhaps..." She turns to face the sleeping man beside her.

"I can just kill him instead. Yes, afterall all these things would have never happened if I never met him. The misery, this hell I call a life. I too can be happy just like my siblings just like other people I too can live a life worthy to live. Yes yes I'll just kill you. If you had never entered my life Harry, I would never be in this position...die..just die.. Die!" She reaches for a pillow attempting to suffocate the man, when she is about to, the door to her small bedroom creaks open. A little head pops out calling her out of her murderous plan.

"Mummy..." The little girl says, the woman drops the pillow turning to the door to see her daughter, tears roll down her cheek.

"What am I doing" she thinks to herself, "what would my daughter do if her father dies more so at the hands of her mother what a horrible life that would be. How could I think of such wickedness, that's not me it'll never be. I have to be there for my baby, for Amanda my little angel". She gently gets up from the old looking bed and walks towards her daughter who was now fully inside the room.

"Amanda darling" she calls to her planting kisses on her head " what's wrong why aren't you in bed?" She questions the 10 year old.

"Did you have a night mare?" Amanda slowly nods her head and let's put a choke followed by a loud cry. In an instant her mother grabs her holding her tight while stroking her hair trying to calm her down.

"Shhhh, there there, it's okay. Mummy's here nothing will harm you my love" she whispers calming words to her daughter who couldn't hold back her cries. "What could she have dreamt of to make her this sad?" The woman thinks to herself, deciding to express her thoughts to the child, she is about to ask her about the dream she had when she hears a hiss followed by a grunt. Her husband Harry is now awake from the loud cries of his daughter.

"What's going on? What is this one crying about at this hour, couldn't she see that I was sleeping huh?!" He states "and you, can't you keep her shut, unlike you I have something to do in the morning, send her to her room to sleep or better still you and her can get out with your drama!!! Can't someone have peace in his own house again??!!" He yells

"Is that all you can say? Your daughter is scared out of her mind and you're more concerned about your sleep? Unbelievable." The woman retorts.

"Did you just raise your voice at me? In my own house??" Harry questions as he gets out of the bed, he stares down at the woman who is crouching while holding the young girl in her hands.

"You're lucky, I really don't have time for you and your daughter's nonsense this night, get out I want to sleep." Harry states in an authoritative voice turning back to go back to bed.

"Of course when have you had time for anything other than food and yourself, disgusting" she spits making Harry halt in his tracks.

"come on Amanda lets go to the kitchen, mummy will make you warm milk and you can tell me everything okay?" She stands up takes the little girl's hand and is about to leave the room when Harry reaches out to her arm roughly gripping it and spinning her around.

"What did you just say to me" he sneers, the little girl is afraid and can't hold back her tears, at her sobs Harry snaps his head to her "keep quiet!!!!" he screams at the little girl, this makes her even more scared and she bursts out crying. Harry grabs her cheeks, making her look up at him "just shut up!!! When will you realise that you are no longer a small child huh?!!! Your crying is disturbing our neighbours, do you also don't want them to go to sleep??!!"

"It is you who is waking the neighbours up by raising your voice!" The woman yells back while smacking his hand away from her daughter. "Amanda" the woman calls out to the child "go wait for me in the kitchen, mummy will be there okay?"

The little girl still crying shakes her head not wanting to leave her mother alone in the room, her mother gives her an assuring look before she leaves closing the door behind her. Now she Is alone in the room with Harry her husband.

"You" Harry breaks the silence " you are now so bold that you talk back to me and ridicule me before my own daughter? In my own house??"

"Oh, so you do realise that she is your daughter when moments ago you were treating her like some pesky fly!" Smack! Harry slaps the woman across the face. She stands there in disbelief, sure Harry was a nasty man but never did her hit her, she thought to herself "has he decided to now add this to his list of assaults?" She thought once more. Grabbing her by the neck, Harry says "indeed my friends were right, there is no better way to shut a woman up than a tight slap. So you think you can come into my house, eat my food, stay under my roof and act mannerless?? I will teach to a lesson today, I will let you know who is the man of this hous-"

"House house house house that's all I hear every damn time!" she cuts him off smacking his hand away

"House?!!! Haha! You call this old raggedy room and parlour a house?!!! The friends that tell you that treat their wives with respect, let's them own a business, takes them places for vacation. They have mighty mansions and you are standing here before me calling this hut a house, just so that you can defend your self, your pride?!!!" She shouts in anger.

"And did you say you feed us? Ha! It is I that feeds you!!! Your galavanting around the town doing side hustles here and there don't feed me and my daughter but you alone. I remember begging my friends for money just to fees that precious child while you come back home smelling of alcohol!!!"

"Arrghh!!" Harry shouts hitting the woman once more across the face, the woman lands with a big thud on the floor.

"You don't have the right to talk to me that way! I am your husband! I paid for you! And I own you!"

"Only God has the right to make such a statement!! you don't and will never own me, you worthless man" she responds while getting up from the floor.

"You better shut your mouth before I send you to an early grave-"

"Do it!!!!" She cuts him off, "kill me!! Dying is far much better than having someone like you as my husband" she sneers. Harry in a fit of rage pushes the woman hard, she stumbles and hits her head on the edge of a dresser and falls to the ground.

Suddenly the woman feels dizzy, she feels warm liquid trickle down the nape of her neck, she hears harry mutter words in worry soon after she hears a scream from her daughter Amanda.

"Mummy!!!" Amanda cries

"Ah my love, I told you to wait for me in the kitchen, you can't be here,leave" she thinks to herself.

"ah is what I said manifesting, but I didn't mean it, I was just depressed" she says to herself with tears running down from her eyes.

"Who will take care of my little one, Amanda my love I didn't even ....get to hear ...what horrible dream you had, I wanted... to comfort you...please God save her from this home don't.... let my... little girl...suff..err.." she blacks out.

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Distant voices are heard, the woman who had just fainted grabs her head as the voices grow louder

"Tina..." The calls her

"Who is that? Have I died? Where am I? Amanda??" She mutters

"She's coming around, everyone give her space" the voice states now clearly. She finally opens her eyes to see who it was that spoke with a somewhat familiar voice. There Harry was staring at her in worry, wearing a tuxedo. In fear, Tina screams punching his face so hard he stumbles backward landing on his butt.

"Don't come near me!!! You Bastard!!" She yells in fright.

"Tina calm down, what's wrong". Tina snaps her head towards the voice that called out to her.

"Dad???" She utters in disbelief "did you die too? You look younger, is this heaven???"

She finally decides to take a look around only to see herself in a church with wedding decorations, most of the people in the church are surrounding her with worry etched on their face. She looks and herself only to see that she is dressed in white.

"Isn't this my wedding gown? Why am I dressed in it, what the hell is going on???"

"Dear calm down, it's your wedding day I was walking you down the isle when all of a sudden you fainted, here get up" her father stretches his hand to lift her up.

"My wedding day?? What do you mean I already got married! Don't put me through the torture of doing it again!"

Everyone stared at her like she was crazy.

"Tina calm down you're drawing attention, compose yourself!" Her mother whispers to her.

"Mom?! You too? You're dead?!"

"This child- look nobody is dead! time is running out we must complete your wedding before noon. Now get up!" Her mother grits through locked teeth

" Today is my wedding day, seriously? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE???!!!"