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I'm a Pastor, what the hell is an Acute Gastroenteritis Outbreak Spell?!

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn't help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire. Firstly, what in the world is the "Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis" spell? And don't even get me started on the "Osteoporosis" spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like "Blood Burn," "Gradual Freeze," and "Mental Chaos." Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities? Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn't help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield "Doomstorm" and "Ice Age," swordsmen boast "Sword Rain: Homecoming" and "Wind-Cutter Slash," while archers showcase "Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars" and "Storm Arrow." Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named "Cancer Cell Proliferation," "T-Virus Infection," and "Rabies Outbreak." In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, "Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!" Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, "Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don't know!" Even a boss character confesses, "Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!"

Yiqian Qingdai · Spiele
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601 Chs

Chapter 289: The Ten-Thousand-Year Ancient Tree, Cui Xiabing's Ambition!_1

In the valley.

Cui Xiabing was sensing the environment of the entire valley with a serious face, as she had awakened over thirty ancient trees, each with a lifespan of over a thousand years, into war treants.

These ancient war treants were powerful; besides controlling a large number of vines and roots, their unique attributes also gave birth to different innate abilities.

For example, a silver needle tree of a thousand years could shoot arrow-like silver needles.

The poison leaf tree could emit deadly toxins, which kept the jackal werewolves at bay.

The iron skin tree, with a body tough as steel, appeared like a steel-made war puppet, suppressing hundreds of lizard-men and jackal werewolves.

"Cui Xiabing, they used a fire attack," said a figure who swiftly rushed from outside the valley.

"What? Fire attack! Have those lizard-men thought of that?"

"What should we do? Fire is naturally the bane of trees..."