Chapter 16: Raven 2.0

Mid 1800's

Border of France

Raven's POV

Ugh. How typical of Reid to not be here when I needed him the most?

A wet towel wiped my forehead clean of the sweat that threatened to trickle down into my eyes. I was in so much pain that it hurt to even breathe. I couldn't believe I had prayed so hard for this at one point. This was what I had based my entire life on as soon as Reid and I started mating. Never in a million years had I expected it to be so difficult. I felt betrayed somehow. I clenched my teeth shut as another tremor racked my body. Oh my gosh.

Nausea engulfed me as I rolled over on my side, the one without the annoying pins and needles, and puked green all over the white tiled floor. I hadn't been able to keep anything down so it was mostly dry heaves racking throughout my body. I felt so weak.

A strong hand clamped unto my own and I turned appreciative blue eyes to the person who held them snugly. Reid. A sob escaped my cracked lips and I never felt more grateful for his presence. He always knew how to make an ugly situation beautiful. A refrigerated glass of water was wedged between my teeth and I took a grateful gulp.

His lips felt cool against my scorching forehead and I closed my eyes basking in his presence. The cloth pressing against my face was almost cold in touch. I knew I was burning up; my whole body felt numb. Dang it. I just wanted to get this baby out of me. It hurt so bad.

"You've got this, Rae," Reid whispered going over my face with the wash cloth once more. I wanted desperately to believe his words but I just felt so angry. Why couldn't he be the one experiencing this? Why did I have to be the one going through this nightmare?

Tears ran down my ashen white face making a beeline for lips that already felt like sand paper. "Reid," I managed to croak out, hating how much my voice sounded. I was sure my voice resembled a dog that had a bone jammed in his throat. A kiss was pressed against my lips. He was so close to me, not caring if he got sick or not. Yes. He was always this self-less.

"I'm scared," I admitted out loud. "Shh," Reid murmured against my lips, pulling my fevered palms into his. "I'm right here, baby," he soothed in a voice that was meant to comfort me. Once more, I felt infuriated. I didn't want to do this anymore. I wanted to rip this baby out of my womb. I knew that once I did so I would feel a hundred times better. I would feel free.

Another contraction hit me and I screamed out with everything I had. I fucking hated this. Reid let out a low growl beside me, refusing to release my hands.

"Do you think you can push?"

Reid must have summoned the doctor because the nurse and him were no longer the only ones in the room. "Please, get it out of me," I cried, ready to start punching someone. Preferably Reid.

"We have to try to reduce your fever, dear," the doctor replied in a calm voice checking my temperature.

My eyes fluttered shut. My head pounded like a damn jackhammer. My body was in so much shock. I couldn't quite grasp all that was happening to me. I could hear the doctor issuing out orders but I just felt so tired. I would give anything to just rest right now. And that's what I did. I drifted off into the deepest sleep I had ever had. It feel so reassuring.

Suddenly I awakened fully aware that Reid was pouring tears over my open palms. I could sense the confusion that coated the room in a sickening aura. What was going on? Why was Reid crying? I opened my mouth ready to ask questions but nothing would croak out.

I felt like I was trapped in a trance-like state; I couldn't quite feel anything. Was this normal? I had no fucking idea. Ugh. Why did I have more questions than I did answers? I was beyond annoyed.

It was hard to explain what I was going through, it just felt like I had left my body and I was now looking down at me. Why the hell was Reid bawling and going on like that for? Why were the doctor and nurse in panic mode, bustling around my body? What were they doing? Why weren't they taking this damn baby out of me?

Omigosh.

The doctor was positioning my legs so that they were now wide open. Talk about no privacy. "Can't you do something else?" Reid demanded in a voice that trembled when he spoke. The doctor worked while she spoke, barking out orders to the poor nurse who stood in the corner gaping. "We can try," the doctor finally answered, "I think she was going to have triplets."

Triplets? And why was she referring to me in the past tense? I wanted to scream, this was certainly confusing. Why wasn't anyone answering my questions?

Oh. My. Gosh. Triplets would be my undoing. I knew my body. There was no way my body could survive having three babies. At the same goddammit time at that. Something was bound to give.

I felt hopeless.

I wanted to comfort Reid but I was frustrated and upset that I couldn't do so. My poor Reidy. I wanted to let him know that everything was going to be okay. That I didn't blame him for anything. I knew we were going to be amazing parents, we had spent many moons just talking about this moment. And I should be happy because it was finally happening.

But something was holding me back.

Reid looked worried more than ever. The doctor was saying something but I couldn't quite make out what she was saying.

Before I could even blink, Reid had pinned the helpless doctor up against the wall barking full on in her face. What was he doing?

Just as the sun comes out to clear the early morning fog away on a bristle morning was how the truth hit me.

I was dead and I hadn't given birth to either babies.

No.

My thoughts immediately went to Reid. He must be so devastated. I didn't want him to feel guilty. If I had one more chance I would honestly just tell him how much I loved him. How I was so honored that we got the chance to spend so much time together. How I wouldn't have changed anything about him or us. He was, had been, the perfect man for me. My quintessential tough guy- strong, silent, self-contained. I would miss him deeply.

My heart broke in two when Reid released an anguished howl echoing for all to hear.