CHAPTER 3: FIRST LOVE
The whole class was following the teacher to the stadium but Mailys was motionless. She was standing still, thinking about what was going to happen. In less than an hour, she will be enthralled by Nate. She knew she already had gone through this so it couldn't have the same impact. She suppressed her feeling for so long, she thought she didn't love him anymore. The logic was effective since she didn't see him for so many years. But now she wasn't sure of anything. What will come of her, of her heart, now that she was about to see him?
It had to be said that even if it feels futile for a grown-up woman to be afraid at that point, for her, it meant facing the moment her life took the wrong turn. From the moment she fell for him, she had put him before anything else. Even before her well-being. She didn't notice she had fallen for him before a long moment, but it's certain that it's that day and that moment that leads her to the path of solitude. It was an irrational fear. She was afraid as she thought that the feeling she felt at that moment in her previous life was the most intense she ever had. How could she not feel anything now?
It was love at first sight. In her past life, right after entering the stadium, as boys headed to locker room, girls scattered around the field divided in little groups of affinity. Mailys too, sat in the side of the field and was watching the games, not thinking much of it. Half an hour later, it was Nate's team turn and they started to play. When he entered her sight of view, she couldn't see anything else anymore. Nate was taller than the other boys, hence, he instantly attracted all the eyes. He was slim, yet Mailys could tell he was well built when she saw her biceps as he was wearing short sleeves. He looked cool and stylish wearing clothes that were all black. His wavy hairs were all over his forehead due to the effort. His eyes were black and profound, and he had a peachy skin she wanted to touch so bad. He was worthily standing like a prince, his aura engulfing the rest. He was good at soccer, and every guy in his team was relying on him. Not only that, but even the other teams were cracking jokes with him from time to time.
- "If Mr. Popular had a face, it must have looked like him," she thought.
Mailys was in a daze. She couldn't move nor look away. She still was young and didn't have the notion of love. She only felt like it would be great to become his friend.
The weirdest thing about this encounter is she didn't remember any of it after she woke up the next morning. She didn't remember the game, nor the rest of the day, nor the way she's gone back home. As strong as her feeling could have been, she forgot it right away. She didn't remember them until she was in her 20s, when it would be too late for them. She lived her life like nothing had happened that day.
In her 7th grade, they were in the same class, and she still didn't connect the dots. This is also at that time that she met Soan. The three of them learn to know each other as classmates. They weren't any feeling of love involved, just comradeship. She was starting to open up to her classmates and actually made many friends she was close with. As her new friends, Soan and Nate already were in the same class in 6th grade, they naturally sympathized. These feelings didn't evolve until several months later when she heard something about him being rude to her. Once again, it was in PE class. The boys were chatting in the locker room about the speeds of the girls during the sprints they had run earlier. Lily overheard the conversation and came to Mailys to tell her about what he said. She was in the mist of hormonal upheavals, so she already started to have woman forms. This was a great complex of her and when she eared that he mentioned it, saying, "she could have been faster if she hadn't had this breast…", she couldn't forgive him. She was sulking like the kid she was, refusing to talk to him. He was often trying to call out to her, asking why she was acting like that, but she was resolute not to respond to him and only him. Once, he even came with friends to a representation in theater to see the play she had a role in. Afterward, they all went to see her and congratulate her on the success of the play. While she was polite with the other, she didn't even look at him.
Three weeks or so later, she randomly chose to stop sulking when she saw he was struggling with his math exercises. She was heading to the teacher desk to show him her test, and while another student was talking to the teacher, she stopped at Nate's side to help him. He didn't look at the test anymore and stared at her with a big radiant smile. She didn't know if it was because she was helping with the test or because she stopped sulking, but she could see gratefulness in his eyes. He was sincerely happy to have her in his life. It took only a moment before Mailys couldn't breathe anymore. She felt her heart fell as her feet did not touch the ground anymore. She had to know him better to connect with the feeling she had in 6th grade and notice the feeling of love. She also understood why she was so mad at him for being rude.
Only after they made up, they could have been considered real friends. Every Wednesday, they would hang out after school with the whole class. They were going to a restaurant, karaoke or just to a park nearby. This day was a Wednesday and after class they all go to the park as it was sunny. Mailys couldn't stop being happy. Her eyes were bright, and she was smiling ear to ear. Lily kept asking about it, but Mailys didn't say anything as they were too many people around. Nate and Soan came so they started to play and chat together. From that moment on, until she got home, Nate and Mailys were glued together. He insisted on walking her home as he was happy, they made up. Lily was still there but Mailys didn't mind. She couldn't see what was surrounding her beside of him. After that, they were always together but she started to feel unease. It felt like she had the weight of the world on her shoulders as she was tense. She was happy to be with him all the time, but she feared she would do or say something she shouldn't say as a friend. Soon, she talked about her feeling to Lily to get some advice. She felt that her feeling was unwanted, that Nate was seeing her as a close friend but nothing more. She herself was sincere about wanting to be just his friend. She didn't need more and didn't want to risk losing him and his bright smile. She decided to never let him know, so she made Lily swore she wouldn't tell a soul. If later, when they will be grown-up people, he shows interest, she may take the bait. But for now, she wasn't ready. She was even scared, maybe this was just a timing issue.
She just chose to stay like that with him and to take things as they come. Lily wasn't that happy about it. She felt like Mailys was too full of herself. They weren't even dating. There was nothing to be happy about. As the day passed her mood was decreasing, and she would always spoil the mood when she wasn't happy about something. One of Nate's best friend, Ayden, also was in that group of friends and stepped in every time to calm her. Ayden had a cheerful personality. He wasn't the handsome type, but he was really cute and gentle. It doesn't matter if it was a boy or girl, everyone was feeling at ease around him. He was always competing with Nate for the stupidest things. To be the top student, to be the first to enter the classroom, to be the first to say hello to Mailys, to be the one to sit next to her... He asked Mailys if she had a boyfriend more than once. Every time, he would play dumb, chuckle and make eye contact with Nate. Not that Mailys ever noticed that.
In 8th grade, they weren't in the same class, but they were as close as they were before. They would see each other in PE class, even if boys and girls were separated. Outside school, they would see each other every time Mailys would have a role in a play. After a theatrical performance, it was a ritual for them to go eat something. They were also texting to each other day and night. They often go to karaoke with classmates, but Nate wasn't satisfied with that and was always asking for her to sing a song. Every time someone wanted to quarrel with her, he would stand up in front of her. He supported her and cheered her up when she was sad. She did the same for him whenever he needed it. They were hugging each other and sweet talking each other. It really was all sweet, naïve and pure. It lasted for few months, then, Nate ended it.