2x16: Sweet Dream

Episode Synopsis: Rachel, Finn and Puck make an attempt to get Rachel her job on Funny Girl back, even when it leads to a run in with Paolo San Pablo. Brittany gets a job at the Spotlight Diner but becomes jealous of Santana and Dani's friendship.

{Scene shows Rachel walking along the hallways of NYADA, holding her books close to her with confusion}

Rachel Voice Over:

Ever since I lost my job for Funny Girl, I've been kind of uncertain of what I want to do with my life. I remembered telling everyone at McKinley I was going to be a Broadway star, which was why I fought nail and tooth for solos all the time. I could have been that girl to make something of herself, venturing from Lima, Ohio to New York City, staring in ten million shows, maybe doing a Woody Allen movie and spending the rest of my life with Finn, growing old, having children…I'm getting a bit ahead of myself here, aren't I? Anyway, now that my Broadway dream has been squashed, I need to decide what I'm going to do. Maybe I could work in show choir like Finn—I mean I know everything there is to know about show choir and I can help Finn with the Glee Club. I know the job is small…and I know I didn't dream of it since I was a little girl…but I'm running out of options…and I'm not quite sure what I'm doing with my life anymore…

Rachel finished her dance class for the afternoon as she gazed over at the other students leaving the room, but Rachel slightly hesitated to follow. She needed a moment to regroup. This had been her life ever since she had been fired from her Broadway show; school, work, home. She didn't even really feel like going to rehearsals for Pamela Landsbury since she felt she was in such a rut. She wasn't quite sure what she was going to do. She continued to stare into the mirror, playing with some of the strands of her hair as she let out a tired sigh. Rachel was supposed to meet the Glee Club soon, but she needed to take a few more minutes to think. As Rachel played with some of her hair, she heard a voice clear behind her—but the voice was more than familiar. It wasn't Finn, it wasn't Puck, it wasn't Santana and it wasn't Kurt…as Rachel turned around, she gazed into the other mirror and saw someone that looked like her but from a few years younger. Rachel took a closer look at the mirror and realized the person clearing their throat was her…but it wasn't her…if that made any sense.

"What do you think you're doing?" The person stared over at Rachel as Rachel ran a hand through her hair.

"Who are you?" Rachel pointed to the mirror.

"Who am I? I'm you from the tenth grade. I'm Old Rachel, or did you bury me into the deeps abyss of your closet when you decided to bang Finn every other day and not focus on your Broadway dreams?" Old Rachel smirked from the mirror, causing Rachel to put a hand to her forehead.

"Oh my god, I think I'm hallucinating." Rachel took a step back from the mirror in shock.

"You aren't hallucinating." Old Rachel shook her head as Rachel continued to gaze at her. "I'm like the Jiminy Cricket to your Pinocchio. I'm your conscience. I'm here to tell you that you can't just give up on your dreams of Broadway all because some jerk tells you that you're fired. You're Rachel Berry, you're supposed to fight back, you're not supposed to give into your husband and think that you'll be happier running a Glee Club. Running a Glee Club may be Finn's dream but it sure as hell isn't yours."

"Well what am I going to do?" Rachel argued. "I lost my job, I have no sense of direction and the only one that seems to understand that is Finn. Maybe this was a sign that I'm not cut out for Broadway…maybe this is a sign that I'm destined for something less and that Broadway was a waste of my time."

"If I could come out of this mirror and slap you, I would." Old Rachel crossed her arms. "Did your dads pay for those tap dancing lessons because they thought you weren't going to amount to anything? Did your father's pay for you to be in the best acting classes or pay to take you to Broadway shows because they knew you'd be a show choir director? Hell no. You're destined to be on Broadway, Rachel…even if you don't see it. I think that you're just scared…"

"What do I have to be afraid of?" Rachel raised an eyebrow.

"We could try with the issue that you might only amount to being a housewife to your husband…" Old Rachel smirked. "I mean, I love Finn just as much as you do, but if you were my age, you never would have married him at 19. You would have waited a couple of years…and your hair makes you look like a porn star."

"What?!" Rachel crossed her arms. "I do not look like a porn star…and are we discussing my Broadway dreams or Finn because Finn's not the problem?!"

"Finn is a part of the problem." Old Rachel said. "You're too blind to see it. What happened to your career? You're putting love in front of your career because love doesn't pay the bills!"

"As long as I have Finn, I don't need anyone or anything else…you got that?" Rachel walked closer to the mirror. "Look, back to the matter at hand, even if I did want to get my job back, there's no way that I could go back there knowing Paolo is working and trying to play my husband on Broadway. He's too much of a pervert."

"So you're going to give up your Broadway dreams because of some person you don't like? Gee, you turned really soft." Old Rachel said. "Look, you need to think about whether or not you're serious about Broadway. That was your one dream, Rachel…now you're in New York going to school to your job at the diner to home. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life working at the diner, singing to hags who think that you should have been on Broadway but you wasted your godforsaken talent? You really don't know what you want these days, do you?" Rachel stared at the mirror thinking Old Rachel had a point…Rachel really didn't know what she wanted. She didn't know what she wanted to be, or what she wanted to do. Rachel sighed, shaking her head slowly.

"I'm…I'm a little lost." Rachel admitted, walking around the room. "I mean, one minute I think I should find a way to get my job back and the next minute I think, why bother? I could work with my husband as he becomes a music teacher and has more of a sense of direction than I do. I'm…I'm torn."

{Rachel stares over at Old Rachel as Rachel lets out a saddened sigh, running a hand through her hair while staring at the mirror}

[Rachel]

I thought I saw a man brought to life

He was warm he came around, he was dignified

You showed me what it was to cry

Well you couldn't be that man that I adored

You don't seem to know or seem to care

What your heart is for

Well I don't know him anymore

There's nothing where he used to lie

My conversation has run dry

That's what's going on

Nothing's fine I'm torn

I'm all out of faith

This is how I feel

I'm cold and I'm ashamed

Lying naked on the floor

Illusion never changed

Into something real

I'm wide awake and I can see

The perfect sky is torn

You're a little late

I'm already torn

{Scene changes to Rachel walking over towards the Glee Room and spots Finn writing something on a notepad while she crosses her arms}

So I guess the fortune tellers right

I should have seen just what was there

And not some holy light

But you crawled beneath my veins tonight

I don't care, I have no luck

I don't miss it all that much

There's just too many things

That I can't touch

I'm torn

I'm all out of faith

This is how I feel

I'm cold and I'm ashamed

Lying naked on the floor

Illusion never changed

Into something real

I'm wide awake and I can see

The perfect sky is torn

You're a little late

I'm already torn

{Scene shows Rachel sitting in her room as she stares over at the mirror, seeing Old Rachel staring back at her with interest}

There's nothing where he used to lie

My inspiration has run dry

That's what's going on

And nothing's right I'm torn!

I'm all out of faith

This is how I feel

I'm cold and I'm ashamed

Lying naked on the floor

Illusion never changed

Into something real

I'm wide awake and I can see

The perfect sky is torn

You're a little late

I'm already torn

I'm all out of faith (I'm all out of faith)

This is how I feel (How I feel)

I'm cold and I'm ashamed

Bound and broken on the floor

You're a little late

I'm already torn

I'm already torn

I'm torn

I'm torn

Oh, Oh whoa (Oh!)

Oh yeah, oh yeah (Oh whoa)

I'm already torn

"So Rachel?" Old Rachel continued to stare at Rachel from Rachel's bedroom mirror. "What are you going to do? Are you going to stand in Finn's shadow or are you going to go out there and use your talents the way we all know you're capable of?" Rachel continued to grin over towards Old Rachel and smiled brightly.

"I'm going to do it." Rachel declared. "I'm going to get my old job back!" As Rachel announced what she was going to do, the door opened and Finn showed himself, slightly raising his eyebrow with interest.

"Rach? Who are you talking to?" Finn asked, sounding slightly amused. Rachel turned around to the mirror and just like that, Old Rachel was gone. Rachel stammered for a minute, seeing the mirror was just showing her and Finn's reflection. Rachel turned back to Finn, feeling her cheeks turn slightly red from embarrassment.

"Um…nobody." Rachel meekly answered, causing Finn to give Rachel a small smile. He entered the room and closed the door, making his way over to Rachel and sitting down on the bed next to her.

"You know, I used to talk to my reflection too." Finn mentioned, staring at her. "I would talk to it about how I was feeling, what was going through my mind…it was like another person staring at you, they would listen to every second of your conversation and they would never interrupt." Rachel chuckled slightly, leaning her head on Finn's shoulder. She held the silence for a moment before finally staring into Finn's eyes.

"So, are you okay?" Rachel softly whispered. Finn knew what Rachel was talking about and he nodded his head slightly.

"I mean…I'm not totally okay but…I will be eventually." Finn admitted. "It's kind of hard losing someone; you know…regardless who they are." Rachel understood what Finn meant and gave him a sly smile as she got up from the bed and pointed to the mirror.

"If you ever need someone to talk to, you can talk or sing to the mirror." Rachel said. "Maybe even the 'Old Finn' will sing along with you…"

"The Old Finn?" Finn really couldn't help but smile now. "So you want me to do a duet with myself? Isn't that like vocal masturbation?"

"Possibly." Rachel bit her lower lip before turning back around and staring into the mirror. "But singing with yourself is fun."

"Yeah, I'll be sure to tell Kurt that since he's the king of singing with himself." Finn got up from the bed as he put a hand on Rachel's shoulder. "Dinner's almost ready, which was what I originally came here to tell you."

"What's for dinner?" Rachel asked as she and Finn exited the bedroom towards the kitchen.

"I found a recipe on the Food Network website…I made stuffed shells." Finn sounded quite proud of himself. "You're going to love it, I promise you." Finn noticed Rachel's slight hesitation as he turned to face her, placing a hand on her shoulders. "Rach, are you okay?"

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine." Rachel looked away from Finn but Finn continued to believe Rachel wasn't okay.

"Come on, Rach. You can tell me what's going on." Finn whispered as he pulled her close to him. "I promise I don't judge." Rachel gave Finn a small smile, suddenly feeling safe.

"I've been thinking about what I want to do with my life as far as the future is concerned." Rachel shrugged her shoulders. "I mean, I may not have Funny Girl anymore which means I have a lot of options open."

"Ah, I remember when I wasn't so sure what the future had in store for me." Finn nodded his head as he and Rachel entered the kitchen, spotting Puck writing on a piece of paper while his guitar was on his lap. "Hey Puck, what are you doing?" Finn asked while Rachel took a seat at the table.

"Oh, I'm just writing all my thoughts on a piece of paper." Puck shrugged his shoulders and banged the guitar slightly. "Then I'm going to put those thoughts to the music."

"So you're writing a song?" Rachel bluntly asked. "Come on Noah, you don't have to hide the fact you like music."

"I'm not hiding the fact I like music." Puck said before his face turned slightly embarrassed. "I'm hiding the fact that I'm writing a song for Quinn."

"Aww! That is the sweetest thing ever." Rachel gushed, staring up at Finn who was busy playfully rolling his eyebrows.

"Could this be so? Puck actually has feelings?!" Finn joked, causing Puck to stare at his best friend.

"Finn, you're lucky you're like my brother because if you weren't…I'd kill you." Puck pointed his pencil towards Finn in feign anger. "Now, be a good little husband to Rachel and feed her dinner." Rachel laughed at Puck's comment and Finn couldn't help but let out an entertained chuckle himself. He went over to the stove to check on dinner while Rachel wringed her hands together, something Puck noticed. "Is there something on your mind, Rachel?"

"Just a little bit." Rachel admitted. While facing her head towards Puck and Finn, Rachel realized something. She wasn't meant to just sit around all day while her talents were a waste. She was meant to do something more…interesting, something more adventurous, she was meant to be a Broadway star!

"Rachel?" Finn walked over to the kitchen table, gazing towards her. "What's going on?"

"I've made a decision!" Rachel turned to the both of them, her confidence returning to it's great lengths. "I'm going to get my job on Funny Girl back and expose Paolo San Pablo as the fraud he is!" Finn had to admit he was surprised Rachel suddenly had her spark back, but Puck saw exposing Paolo San Pablo as a chance to get their revenge on him.

"YES!" Puck fist pumped his free hand in the air. "I'm in!" Rachel clapped her hands with delight, but Finn was a bit skeptical.

"Hold on guys." Finn sat down in between Rachel and Puck. "Look, I know that Paolo hurt you Rachel and I feel extremely bad for making you lose your job because I beat the daylights out of him…but Rach, this is a long shot…I mean, what if it doesn't work?"

"Finn, weren't you the one that always told me that when I put my mind to something, good things happen?" Rachel asked. Finn quickly nodded his head as Rachel continued. "This is something that I think can work…I think we can expose Paolo, get him fired and I could have my job back. But, Puck and I can't do this ourselves…we need you…I need you." Rachel grabbed Finn's hand while still gazing into his eyes. Finn continued to look at Rachel, feeling his smile soften just a bit.

"All right." Finn relented. "We'll do this…but if we're going to do this, we're going to have to come up with a plan. And a good one."

"All right, first things first…how do we get into the theatre?" Puck wondered.

"Oh, that's simple." Finn said. "I know exactly what we have to do in order to succeed in that." Finn continued to stare at Rachel and Puck, giving them a smirk. It was on. It was time to put Rachel back on the Broadway stage where she belonged.

"Dani, I need more sugar for table six!" Santana shouted towards her friend at the diner that afternoon while Dani wiped down some of the counters. "My goodness, why couldn't Finn, Rachel and Kurt work today out of all days? The rush is insane."

"Don't worry, they'll get the rush tomorrow." Dani smirked, giving Santana one of the sugar containers while she walked by. "At least after work we can head to the mall and do some shopping."

"Gotta love payday." Santana agreed, pointing her finger over at Dani. "Just a few more hundred and we can buy that new guitar that you've had your eye on. Trust me at our next Pamela Landsbury gig, you're going to own and shred that thing."

"I know…so where do you think Kurt is booking our next Pamela Landsbury gig?" Dani questioned.

"I literally have no idea." Santana shrugged her shoulders, wiping down one of the tables. "I hope it's not at Callbacks again. The last time it was at Callbacks, I was sure Finn was going to maul Puck for going after Rachel…and we don't need a repeat of that."

"Did Finn eventually forgive Puck for that?" Dani wondered.

"Eventually." Santana said. "I mean, it took until before Regionals but Finn did forgive him. Anyway, as much as I love to gossip about Finn and Puck and trust me, I love gossiping about them since their lives are as dull as a History Channel special…" Santana didn't get a chance to finish her sentence as the door swung open to the Spotlight Diner. She raised her eyebrow in confusion as Dani's eyes followed to where Santana was staring The two girls noticed Brittany entering the diner, in what looked to be a Spotlight Diner uniform. Santana had to question what was going on here—why did Brittany look like that and what was she trying to prove? "Brittany?" Santana strolled over to her friend.

"Oh, hi Santana." Brittany waved before her eyes fell on Dani. The last time Brittany and Dani interacted, Santana and Brittany had broken up and it gave Santana leeway to date Dani. However, now that Dani and Santana were broken up, it just made things awkward whenever Brittany and Dani came into contact. "Hi Dani." Brittany spoke in a cordial tone.

"What's going on here?" Santana questioned, pointing over to her outfit. "I mean, if I didn't know any better, you look like you're coming to work at the Spotlight Diner."

"Oh, did I forget to tell you?" Brittany wondered. "I have a job here now." Santana and Dani stared at one another and in a moment's notice both of them started cracking up as if Brittany just told the funniest joke in the world. Santana continued to laugh, but she noticed Brittany was just staring at her with a serious face expression. After a few moments, Santana's laughter subsided and she realized Brittany really was serious. Brittany did get a job at the diner…Brittany really was going to be her co-worker.

"Oh my god, you were serious." Santana's expression turned serious as she faced Brittany.

"Of course I was serious." Brittany said. "When aren't I serious?"

"Well…" Dani and Santana exchanged a glance. Dani cleared her throat, holding her hand out for Brittany to shake. "We are so glad that you're working with us Brittany. Us working together is going to be a lot of fun." Brittany didn't know whether to make heads or tails of the situation, so to be the bigger person, Brittany shook Dani's hand. Brittany wasn't quite sure she could trust Dani yet, seeing that Dani was the one that came between Santana and Brittany the first time.

"Come on, let's get to work before we get fired." Santana motioned for Brittany to follow her. "All you're going to do is wipe down tables."

"Sweet, so what are you going to be doing?" Brittany raised her eyebrow.

"Dani and I are going to go over there and help customers with their orders." Santana furthered explained. "Your job seems easy enough, right?"

"I guess…" Brittany shrugged her shoulders, but as she saw Santana and Dani walking away, she noticed they were laughing about something—and it caused Brittany's heart to sink a little. Brittany didn't understand why, but she suddenly felt like she was the third wheel in their friendship—and she didn't like it one bit.

Two hours later, Finn, Rachel and Puck were standing in front of the theatre for Funny Girl and Finn was getting ready to put his plan into action. As they stood in the front of the theatre, Puck crossed his arms and gave his friend a smirk.

"So Finn, what's your plan for us to get inside the building?" Puck wondered. "Once Paolo recognizes us, he's going to make sure that we're thrown out but not before he makes a comment towards Rachel." Finn smirked over towards his friend and went into his backpack to get something. As Rachel and Puck gazed at Finn with interest, Finn pulled out what looked to be…a wig?

"Finn, what are you going to do with that?" Rachel pointed towards the wig as Puck snickered.

"Wait, wait…don't let him explain." Puck put his hand up to stop Rachel's curiosity. "I know where this is going."

"Finn, please don't tell me you're going to wear that wig." Rachel put her hand over her mouth while Finn put on the wig. Puck went into a fit of laughter with Rachel soon following, but Finn put his hand up to get them to both stop.

"All right, all right. So this wasn't the best idea I had." Finn sighed and as soon as he finished speaking, Puck and Rachel started laughing again. "Can I explain my plan before you guys think it's a "laugh at Finn" fest?"

"All right, all right…we're sorry, babe." Rachel calmed down after a few moments, gesturing to her husband. "What's your plan?"

"I was thinking Puck and I can dress up like the guys from the band KISS. I mean, everyone loves KISS, so we sneak in, get close enough to talk to Mr. Campion and then…boom. You're back on Funny Girl." Finn said.

"You know, if you think about it…" Rachel stared at Puck who equally looked amazed. "That's actually a really good plan. Wait, but if you and Puck go in there then what am I doing?"

"That's simple Rachel-ella." Puck crossed his arms, giving her a satisfied smirk. "You're going to do our makeup and hide out."

"Nope. Rachel's sneaking in the theatre too." Finn corrected Puck. Puck suddenly turned confused, trying to understand Finn's logic.

"But…the band KISS is only dudes…" Puck said. "Rachel's not a dude, so how are you going to sneak her in?"

"With the power of a curling iron, hair spray, designer Vogue clothes; courtesy of Kurt and the Vogue vault and some designer sunglasses, Rachel is going to act the part she was going to play…" Finn continued to gaze at Rachel while a smile formed on his face. "A bona-fide diva!"

"Wait!" Rachel put her hand up, stopping Finn and Puck in their thoughts. "If I get to act like a diva, the KISS idea has to go.:

"So if you're a diva, what do we dress as?" Puck's eyes widened, noticing the devilish smirk on Rachel's face. Oh, Rachel made sure she thought of that...

"EXCUSE ME!" Rupert Campion walked towards the front of the theatre 30 minutes later, spotting Rachel in disguise. Rachel had to admit Finn and Puck did a great job in disguising her in looking like a rich superstar. Rachel imagined this as playing a role, besides it would help her if she landed a role later in her career. "Excuse me! I'm looking for Rupert Campion and I need to speak with him immediately!" Mr. Campion gazed at Rachel and Rachel had to admit she was afraid Mr. Campion was going to see right through her disguise. After a few moments, Mr. Campion let out a warm smile and nodded his head.

"Yes, how may I assist you?" Mr. Campion asked. "Ms…"

"LuPone." Rachel continued to speak in her Jersey accent. "Cindy LuPone, I'm Patti LuPone's second cousin twice removed, It's a long family line." Mr. Campion nodded his head slightly, raising an eyebrow with slight suspicion.

"All right…Cindy. How can I be of assistance?" Mr. Campion wondered.

"Well as you can see, Mr. Campion I overheard that you were having auditions for Funny Girl ever since you kicked that little girl off for being inappropriate or some jazz like that." Rachel held her head high while gazing over at Mr. Campion. "I came to follow my second cousin's twice removed Broadway path and I assure you that I have a talent…" Mr. Campion slightly chuckled, nodding his head slowly.

"All right Cindy, um…if you will follow me this way." Mr. Campion said. Rachel put her hand up as if to stop Mr. Campion from going any further. "Is something the matter Ms. LuPone?"

"Actually, yes." Rachel snapped her fingers and a second later, Puck and Finn came right next to her dressed as bodyguards. "These are my body guards and they must be with me at all times! Patti would really appreciate it if these two can come with me during rehearsals, just to protect my family's good name." Mr. Campion gazed at Puck and Finn, finally relenting and shrugging his shoulders.

"All right then." Mr. Campion motioned for Finn and Puck to follow. As Mr. Campion and Rachel walked along, Finn and Puck stared over at one another—and Puck had slight disappointment on his face.

"Dude, what's the matter?" Finn whispered.

"I really liked your KISS idea better." Puck whined slightly as Finn patted Puck's back, walking ahead of him just so he could keep an eye on Rachel.

On her lunch break, Brittany sat down in the booth and was staring at her iPad—as she skyped with her cat Lord Tubbington. Brittany had to admit that she felt kind of lonely at work, and even though Santana was there, Santana was always so busy hanging around with Dani.

"It's not that I don't like Dani, Lord Tubbington but…she stole Santana from me when I came to New York as soon as Santana moved here…" Brittany sighed. Lord Tubbington purred into the camera while Brittany rolled her eyes slightly. "I get it, I get it. You want me try to be friends with Dani because Santana likes her…but it's not that easy…" As Brittany ran a hand through her hair, she noticed Lord Tubbington placing a paw on his part of the screen. "So what do you think I should do? Do you think I should try to join Santana and Dani, or should I just…ignore it and hope that Santana will immediately let me join her group? I mean…" Lord Tubbington suddenly swatted at the screen while Brittany giggled slightly. "I miss you Lord Tubbington. I really do. I kind of wish that you were in New York with me…it wouldn't be as lonely, but I don't think Finn likes cats." Brittany was interrupted from her conversation when she heard Santana and Dani giggle behind her while eating lunch in their own booth. Brittany looked down at her iPad and noticed—Lord Tubbington was offline. He probably went to go to play poker online, Brittany thought to herself. Brittany continued to stare at Santana and Dani…and she found herself feeling alone. Brittany got up from her booth and noticed the pianist playing a song that she was familiar with. She closed her eyes for one moment and in the next minute, it felt like Brittany was in a black and white music video, and the focus of her problems were Santana and Dani.

{Scene starts with the male workers at the Spotlight Diner walking over to Brittany and Brittany stares over at Santana with sadness}

[Brittany]

Turn the lights on!

{She does a dance scene with the male Spotlight Diner dancers and stares at Santana and Dani}

Every night I rush to my bed

With hopes that maybe I'll get a chance to see you when I close my eyes

I'm going out of my head

Lost in a fairy tale

Can you hold my hand and be my guide?

Clouds filled with stars cover your skies

And I hope it rains

You're the perfect lullaby

What kind of dream is this

You can be a sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare

Either way I, don't want to wake up from you

(Spotlight Diner Workers: Turn the light on!)

Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare

Somebody pinch me, your loves too good to be true

(Spotlight Diner Workers: Turn the light on!)

My guilty pleasure I ain't going nowhere

Baby, long as you're here

I'll be floating on air cause you're my…

You can be a sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare

Either way I, don't want to wake up form you

{Brittany jumps on the tables and she dances on them while the other workers dance with her}

I mention you when I say my prayers

I wrapped you around all of my thoughts

Girl, you're my temporary high

I wish that when I wake up you're there

To wrap your arms around me for real and tell me you'll stay by my side

Clouds filled with stars cover your skies

And I hope it rains

You're the perfect lullaby

What kind of dream is this

You can be a sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare

Either way I, don't want to wake up from you

(Spotlight Diner Workers: Turn the light on!)

Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare

Somebody pinch me, your loves too good to be true

(Spotlight Diner Workers: Turn the light on!)

My guilty pleasure I ain't going nowhere

Baby, long as you're here

I'll be floating on air cause you're my…

You can be a sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare

Either way I, don't want to wake up form you

{Brittany walks over to Santana and stares into her eyes as she smiles softly}

Tattoo your name across my heart

So it will remain…

Not even death can make us part

What kind of dream is this

You can be a sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare

Either way I, don't want to wake up from you

(Spotlight Diner Workers: Turn the light on!)

Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare

Somebody pinch me, your loves too good to be true

(Spotlight Diner Workers: Turn the light on!)

My guilty pleasure I ain't going nowhere

Baby, long as you're here

I'll be floating on air cause you're my…

You can be a sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare

Either way I, don't want to wake up form you

Turn the lights out!

"Brittany!" Brittany shook her head, noticing that Santana was gazing into her eyes while snapping her fingers. "Good, you're back. Are you okay, Britt? You've been acting really…really…odd?"

"Me?" Brittany pointed to herself. "No, I'm fine Santana."

"Are you sure?" Santana asked. Before Brittany could say anything else, Dani walked over to Santana and grinned towards her.

"Santana, you have to check this out!" Dani pulled Santana away from Brittany before Brittany could interject. As Brittany watched Santana and Dani hang out, she felt her heart sink further. She wondered if coming to New York was the best idea—and she wondered if Santana truly didn't want anything to do with her anymore. Even though she was in the city with her best friend—Brittany felt lost and alone.

Rachel, Finn and Puck walked along the hallways of the theatre, following Mr. Campion as Rachel kept up the diva act. Finn and Puck had to admit that Rachel probably should have been in the running to win a Golden Globe for this performance; she played a believable diva—of course, Rachel really was a diva. She just had to over exaggerate.

"Keep up!" Rachel shouted to Finn and Puck while she was in character. "I should have told Patti to get me better bodyguards than you two!" When Mr. Campion wasn't looking, Rachel moved her shades just enough so Finn could see her eyes and winked at him. Finn stifled a chuckle while giving her a loving smirk and Puck simply shrugged his shoulders. Rachel put her glasses back on and continued to walk—but she bumped into Paolo San Pablo as soon as she turned around. Finn caught Rachel in order to prevent her from falling and Puck sent a glare through his sunglasses at the creepy Broadway actor.

"Well, well, well…what do we have here?" Paolo smirked. Mr. Campion turned around and saw Rachel staring over at Paolo. "A friend of yours, Rupert?"

"Actually, she's here to audition for Funny Girl." Mr. Campion held the clipboard close to him. "These are her bodyguards."

"Is that so?" Paolo gazed at Rachel, reaching down to take her hand but Finn pulled Rachel away. Paolo looked up at Finn and in order to stick with the bodyguard act, Finn cleared his throat.

"Sorry, she doesn't like being touched by anyone…" Finn did his own fake New Jersey accent…and Rachel had to admit Finn surprisingly sounded good. "Now, if you do not mind moving along, Cindy would greatly appreciate it." Paolo continued to gaze at Finn, trying to see if he recognized Finn from anywhere. In the end, he backed away from Rachel, causing her to give a small smile.

"I'm sorry it's just…your friend looks very attractive…and she looks very familiar." Paolo's lips curled into a small smile and Rachel suddenly felt uncomfortable. Finn held onto Rachel with a protective grip, trying his hardest to not punch Paolo in the face. Rachel noticed Mr. Campion was staring over at Rachel and it seemed realization dawned on him. Mr. Campion was well aware Cindy was Rachel and the body guards were Finn and Puck—but when he noticed Paolo making Rachel feel uncomfortable, he decided to play along in order to see where this went.

"Cindy, come along. Your audition awaits." Mr. Campion said, curling his hand as if he was telling Rachel, Finn and Puck to follow him. They entered the auditorium and Mr. Campion motioned for Rachel, Puck and Finn to have a seat in the back row. Rachel, Puck and Finn sat down in the back row of the auditorium as they gazed at the line of women vying to be the next Fanny Brice. "Just sit tight here and you will be called." Mr. Campion smiled and made his way over towards the directors table. Paolo sat in the seat in front of Rachel while Finn's lips turned into a slight snarl.

"All right, you can cut the act…" Paolo smirked. "I know that it's you, Rachel." Rachel continued to stare over at Paolo before lowering her glasses.

"How did you know it was me?" Rachel said in her normal voice.

"Please, you call what you and your scrawny husband did 'acting'?" Paolo let out a low chuckle. As Finn and Rachel continued to look over at Paolo, Puck snuck away from them and headed outside of the auditorium, with hopes that the second part of Finn's plan would go well. Finn and Rachel continued to gaze at Paolo, causing Rachel slight anxiety.

"What do you want with us?" Rachel whispered. "I mean, there's nothing you could possibly want, except to blackball me from Broadway. I know you lied to Mr. Campion. I know Finn came and beat you up but that was only because you were acting like a pervert. And to my defense, I didn't know what Finn was doing until he told me about it."

"All right, let me tell you something toots." Paolo got closer to Rachel's face, and Finn was five second away from shoving Paolo and getting into a tussle with him. "Here's how it works; I get what I want and I could get what you want…you want to be back on Funny Girl? Fine. All you'd have to do is give me seven minutes of pure heaven and I will make sure that you're singing on Broadway on Opening Night…it's a win-win…" Rachel looked offended at Paolo's offer, finally letting her anger out and pushing him into one of the seats. Everyone turned their heads over towards Rachel and Paolo and Finn got up from his seat as he stared down at the actor.

"Do you think that trying to sleep with Rachel is some game?!" Finn screamed. Rachel looked over at Mr. Campion, who walked over to the three of them. "You are a worthless piece of crap and I am tired of guys like you getting what you want while girls like Rachel have to suffer because you have seniority! What the hell does seniority mean if you use it to get other people fired because they won't get in your pants?!" Mr. Campion simply gazed at Paolo and he looked betrayed.

"Rachel?" Mr. Campion turned towards Rachel, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to clear my name and to prove that I wasn't the one who was coming on to Paolo!" Rachel crossed her arms in return as she spoke. "I'm not going to lose my job because I don't want to sleep with anyone that isn't Finn. I don't know what his game is and I'm tired of him using the fact that he's been in the business for over 15 years. Mr. Campion, you need to believe me…I would never do anything to jeopardize my job or my marriage. I understand you are a very important businessman…but this is the only thing that makes me feel alive. This has been my dream ever since I was a little girl…and I am not going to let that man get in my way because he wants to fulfill his disgusting sexual desires. I will be on Broadway…and no one is going to stand in my way…no one…" As Rachel continued to look over at Mr. Campion, they heard the door open…and in came Puck holding surveillance footage.

"All right, I got proof that this little prick over here was the one that came onto Rachel…" Puck stared at Mr. Campion, putting a hand in his pocket. "But I'm going to need one of those extremely old T.V.'s." Mr. Campion motioned for Puck to follow him, and as Puck did so, Finn continued to glare at Paolo. Mr. Campion took the tape from Puck and put it inside the VCR while everyone clamored around it. "This was from Rachel's first rehearsal…and I think you'll be extremely interested in how this plays out." Mr. Campion and Finn continued to look at the T.V., staring at the evidence before them.

"Okay, let's get something straight, you're like possibly fifteen years older than me for one thing and another thing, I'm married! I'm not going to date any of my co-stars because I am happily married to the man I love. I know 19 is a young age to get married but this is something that I wanted more than anything. I'm in love with my husband and if you have a problem with that, then you can—" Paolo meekly turned away as Finn and Mr. Campion's eyes widened at the fact Paolo planted a kiss on Rachel. So everything Rachel was telling me was the truth, Mr. Campion thought to himself. Finn heard someone's feet shuffling as he turned towards the door, spotting Paolo clumsily trying to open the door. Finn and Puck charged over towards him and pulled him away from the auditorium door, causing Paolo to fall to the ground.

"You son of a bitch." Finn snarled as Puck put a hand on Finn's shoulder.

"Down boy, we don't need you to kill the man…although, it seems his life and career is over." Puck kept the same steely look Finn had, and Rachel walked over to Paolo in anger.

"How does it feel to have your lies exposed?" Rachel glared at him while Mr. Campion trotted over to them. "And now that I have that tape, I'm calling the police and I am pressing charges…and I could also add a new charge after you tried to exchange my job for sex."

"You have no proof of that." Paolo laughed believing he got away with something. Finn took out his phone and pressed play on the recording, revealing everything Paolo had said to Rachel and Finn moments before. Mr. Campion stared at Paolo, furrowing his eyebrows in disgust.

"So I was just wondering…was that enough evidence for you to see that you fired the wrong person?" Puck asked. Finn crossed his arms, glaring at Paolo as if Paolo was nothing more than a nuisance.

"Yes, that was more than enough evidence." Mr. Campion sighed. Mr. Campion could have done the conventional way of firing Paolo…but since Finn and Puck were dressed as bodyguards, it was only fitting they finished playing their role.

"UNHAND ME!" Paolo screamed as Finn and Puck dragged Paolo out of the theatre, throwing him to the curb. "This is no way to treat a Broadway star!" Finn and Puck gazed at one another, simply shrugging their shoulders.

"You're a has been bro." Puck smirked.

"Don't come around here again, or we will kick your ass…" Finn threatened as he and Puck entered the theatre and shut the door. Paolo looked up at the marquee, noticing that his name was suddenly coming off and Rachel's was going back on. That was when it hit Paolo—he lost his job, all because of Rachel, Finn and Puck—and no one in their right mind would hire him ever again.

Finn and Puck re-entered the auditorium, noticing that Rachel and Mr. Campion were having a one-on-one talk. Finn motioned for Puck so the both of them could get closer to their conversation.

"So, in a matter of two weeks I lost both Fanny and Nick…" Mr. Campion said. "And…the reason I lost Fanny was because I let some actor blind me and I couldn't see that he was the one that was bothering my co-star…so I apologize if I hurt you, Rachel."

"It's okay, Mr. Campion." Rachel said. "All I really wanted to do was clear my name and earn my respect in the Broadway world. This is my dream—and I sort of had a small conversation with myself, realizing that this was something I wanted to do. I'm going to be the best Broadway actress in this world…and no one will stand in my way. I thank you for listening to me and giving me a chance to explain myself…" Mr. Campion handed Rachel the Funny Girl script while emitting a grin.

"I hope that now I only have to find a Nick Arnstein, that is…if you'd like to return." Mr. Campion said. Rachel's smile widened and she immediately went over and hugged him tightly, gripping onto her boss with glee. Rachel Berry…achem…Rachel Hudson was now on Broadway. "All right, now…I was thinking we could have done You Are Woman, I Am Man…but there's no one to rehearse with you since we now have to find our new Nick."

"Um, if it's okay…I think that I could do the song myself until we find someone." Rachel said. Mr. Campion was about to protest, but Rachel was on her way to the stage in order to do the number. Finn quickly stood by Mr. Campion, noticing Mr. Campion's worried.

"She's never rehearsed this number on her own before." Mr. Campion stated. Finn put a hand on Mr. Campion's shoulder, giving him a confident nod of his head.

"If she has the right help…she'll be fine." With that, Finn went up to the stage, and spotted Rachel almost looking worried. When she spotted Finn, her eyes widened and she ran a hand through her hair.

"Finn, what are you doing here?" Rachel walked up to Finn and saw he was smiling down at her.

"I know that you're nervous…" Finn softly said. "And I know that you've never really done this number before without a partner—I know, Mr. Campion told me…but you need to know that you're a star, and you shine your brightest when you are confident." Finn placed his hands on her shoulders, still looking into her eyes. "Rachel, ever since you were a little girl you dreamt of being on Broadway. Your entire life has led you to this moment…Rachel, you…are…Funny Girl. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Now, I know you don't have a partner…but in the meantime, I'm available to duet with you, and I know that I'm your favorite duet partner. If it makes you feel better, I read the entire script of Funny Girl and made notes in your copy of the script." Rachel's smile widened while placing a hand on Finn's cheek.

"You really did that?" Rachel sounded touched. "Finn, you didn't have to do that…"

"I did." Finn admitted. "Rachel, I want to sing the song with you….until your boss can find a new Nick Arnstein. Besides…Nick Arnstein sounds kind of badass." Rachel laughed, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"Well then, I would be more than honored to duet with you on a Funny Girl song." Rachel said. Finn led Rachel to the stage as she stared out, giving Mr. Campion a nod of his head. Mr. Campion sat in the seat next to Puck and stared intently at Finn and Rachel, with his eyes mostly on Finn.

{Rachel sits in the chair and Mr. Campion cues for the scene to go on. Rachel stares at Finn and Finn smiles at her as he walks around her, feeling at ease}

[Finn]

You are woman, I am man

You are smaller, so I can be taller than

You are softer to the touch

It's a feeling I like very much

{Finn sits down next to Rachel and puts an arm around her shoulders, causing Rachel to give him a flirty look}

You are someone, I've admired

Still, our friendship

Leaves something to be desired

Does it take more explanation than this

You are woman, I am man

Let's kiss…

{Rachel playfully pushes Finn away and gets up from her chair as she walks around him with a smile}

[Rachel]

Isn't this the height of nonchalance

Furnishing a bed in restaurants

Well, a bit of dinner never hurt

But guess who is going to be dessert

Do good girls do just what mama says

But mama's not around, it's a feeling

Oy vey what a feeling

[Finn]

A bit of pate?

[Rachel]

Oh, I'd drink it all day

Should I do the things he'll tell me to

In this pickle, what would Sadie do

In my soul I feel an inner lack

Just suppose he wants his dinner back

Now I feel that there's a fire here

Oh, try that once a little higher dear

What a beast to ruin such a pearl

Would a convent take a Jewish girl

{Rachel sits down next to Finn as the both of them pretend to laugh. Finn and Rachel get closer to one another and they continue to stare into each other's eyes}

[Finn]

You are woman…

[Rachel]

You are man…

[Finn]

Let's…

Rachel connected her lips to Finn's, as everyone in the audience stood up and applauded. Puck grabbed a tissue and dabbed his eye with it, and Mr. Campion looked thoroughly impressed. There was chemistry, there was the perfect amount of romance, there was everything he wished there would be and more. Rachel was Funny Girl…and he may have found his new Nick Arnstein!

"Finn?" Mr. Campion walked towards the stage, giving Finn a smile. "How would you like to star in the Broadway revival of Funny Girl as the one and only Nick Arnstein?" Finn appeared shocked. He never considered himself Broadway material, and there was still his Glee Club to think about. As he turned to Rachel, she had to admit that she was in shock as well-but it was the good kind of shock. The fact she could work with her husband all day sounded absolutely delightful. As Rachel stared at Finn, wondering what reaction he would have, Finn finally gave Mr. Campion a nod of his head.

"Why not? This could be fun." Finn shrugged his shoulders. "Besides…I'd get to kiss Rachel at work every day? That's a given bonus." Rachel laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck. Everyone clapped their hands with glee while Rachel pressed a kiss to Finn's cheek. This might have meant Finn would have to quit his job at the diner, but this could be something Finn could tell his students one day when he became a teacher. Finn had to admit though, starring in Funny Girl as Rachel's husband was a given bonus.

"Dinner's ready!" Rachel shouted that evening as Santana, Brittany, Finn and Puck made their way to the living room. Rachel placed down the dinner on the coffee table and sat on the couch next to Finn, running her hands through his hair. "Where's Kurt?"

"Oh, he's doing something for Isabelle at Vogue, he'll be back later." Santana waved her hand. "So, I have to tell you the most funniest thing Dani did at work today." Santana folded her hands together. Brittany simply gazed at Santana with sadness and jealousy as she spoke about Dani. Brittany wasn't sure what she was jealous about—but she hated feeling this way. She missed being the one Santana would tell stories about. She missed Santana…and she didn't like feeling left out of Santana's life.

"Brittany?" Brittany shook her head, staring at Finn and Puck who were simply gazing at her. "Brittany, are you okay?" Finn wondered.

"Yeah, I'm cool." Brittany said. "Um…anyway, Rachel I heard that you got your job back at Funny Girl."

"Really?!" Santana seemed surprised. "So that Paolo jerk was exposed as a fraud?"

"Yes, yes he was." Rachel grinned. "And there's some better news…Mr. Campion cast someone to be the new Nick Arnstein."

"Oh, please don't tell me that it's going to be another pervert that we're going to have to save you from." Santana said. Rachel shook her head and used one of her hands to point to Finn. Santana's eyes widened in shock at the news. "Finn? Finn is going to play your husband on Broadway? Now I have to get tickets to see this train wreck."

"I think it's really cute." Brittany said. "Congratulations Finn."

"Thank you, Brittany." Finn said, grabbing Rachel's hand with a smile. "Broadway's not something I want to do for a career, but it's something I want to do with Rachel. But, I vow that after Funny Girl, I'm retiring from showbiz and I will be a teacher."

"You're going to make an amazing teacher." Rachel smiled. She looked over at Puck and Finn as she took another deep breath. "You know, I almost forgot to thank both you and Puck, Finn. If it weren't for you two, then I never would have had the guts or the chance to go after my dreams…I love you guys so much."

"We love you too, Rachel." Finn gazed into her eyes.

"Yeah, anything for you." Puck agreed. "Besides, I think if you ended up like the pre-college Finn, I'd be worried. We're just glad that jerk is finally fired and out of the Broadway showbiz world." Rachel smiled at Puck and got up from her position, walking over to her friend. Puck eyed Rachel as Rachel motioned for Puck to stand up. Puck stood up from his seat, noticing Rachel was giving him a warm smile.

"I really owe you a thank you, Noah…I mean…I really do." Rachel said. "You were there since the beginning in this whole Paolo mess and…you are the most amazing friend I could ever have…you're one of my best friends and you proved that along with being a badass, you're also a sweetheart. So, thank you." Puck smiled at Rachel, wrapping her into a hug.

"You're welcome." Puck said. "You know, aside from Finn, you're my best friend too." Rachel and Puck separated from their hug and noticed Finn was beaming while watching the both of them. "So, now that it's over, what should we do now?"

"Well, I had an idea." Rachel walked over to her CD rack and took out the Mamma Mia soundtrack. "Usually one of the movies I love to watch is Mamma Mia and there's always a song that makes me smile. It would make me smile if we all sang it together." Rachel noticed everyone nodding their heads as Rachel put the CD into the boom box, allowing the song to play.

{Rachel gazes at her friends as she smiles and sings along with the song that's currently playing}

[Rachel]

I've been cheated by you since I don't know when

So I made up my mind, it must come to an end

Look at me now, will I ever learn

I don't know how, but I suddenly lose control

There's a fire within my soul

Just one look and I can hear a bell ring

One more look and I forget everything, whoa, oh

{Rachel walks over to the couch and everyone smiles as they sing along with her}

[Rachel with Finn, Puck, Santana and Brittany]

Mamma Mia, here I go again

My, my, how can I resist you

Mamma Mia, does it show again

My, my, just how much I've missed you

[Rachel and Santana]

Yes I've been broken hearted

Blue since the day we parted

[Puck and Finn with Rachel, Santana and Brittany]

Why, why, did I ever let you go

Mamma Mia, now I really know

My, my, I could never let you go

{Scene changes to the NYADA auditorium and Rachel, Finn, Puck, Santana and Brittany are dressed in ABBA inspired attire as they walk around the stage playing with hoola-hoops, Brittany sadly glances over at Santana and sighs. Rachel looks at the mirror and sees Old Rachel giving her a thumbs up as she smiles back at the reflection}

[Brittany]

I've been angry and sad at the things that you do

(with Santana: I can't count all the times that I told you we're through)

Then when you go, when you slam the door

I think you know, that you won't be away too long

You know that I'm not that strong

[Finn with Rachel, Puck, Santana and Brittany]

Just one look and I can hear a bell ring

One more look and I forget everything, whoa, oh

[Rachel, Finn and Brittany with Santana and Puck]

Mamma Mia, here I go again

My, my, how can I resist you

Mamma Mia, does it show again

My, my, just how much I've missed you

[Santana and Brittany]

Yes I've been broken hearted

Blue since the day we parted

[Rachel, Finn, Puck, Brittany and Santana]

Why, why did I ever let you go

Mamma Mia, even if I say

Bye, bye, leave me now or never

Mamma Mia, it's a game we play

Bye, bye doesn't mean forever

Mamma Mia, here I go again

My, my, how can I resist you

Mamma Mia, does it show again

My, my, just how much I've missed you

[Puck and Santana]

Yes I've been broken hearted

Blue since the day we parted

[Rachel and Finn with Puck, Brittany and Santana]

Why, why, did I ever let you go

Mamma Mia, now I really know

My, my, I could never let you go

[Finn and Puck]

Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh

Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh

[Rachel, Finn Puck, Santana and Brittany]

Mamma Mia

{Brittany and Santana exchange a glance as the screen goes black}

GUEST STARRING

Heather Morris as Brittany Pierce

Peter Facinelli as Rupert Campion

Ioan Gruffudd as Paolo San Pablo

SONG(S):

Torn (Originally by Ednaswap): Performed by Rachel Berry

Sweet Dream (Originally by Beyonce): Performed by Brittany Pierce

You Are Woman, I Am Man (Originally from Funny Girl): Performed by Finn Hudson and Rachel Berry

Mamma Mia (Originally from Mamma Mia): Performed by Rachel Berry, Finn Hudson, Noah "Puck" Puckerman, Santana Lopez and Brittany Pierce