New Game

' Where am I? Why can't I remember anything? Why is everything so dark and why can't I feel or say something'

Suddenly a menu pops up in front of me with only two options to choose from. "New Game" and "Game Over". I tried to tap on the new game, but again I couldn't feel my arm moving and no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't seem to push the button.

'Just think! How can I press the button to start a new game?'

???: (Claptrap from Borderlands) "Exactly!! Just think it and it'll happen."

'Who said that!? Where are you!? Most importantly what the Fuck is going on here!?'

Irritating Voice: "All will be explained in due time, but right now, you need to focus and think of the option you want to choose and we can continue."

'Fine! New Game.'

Suddenly another menu appears in front of me. "Welcome Gamer! You have chosen to start a new game. Please choose a voice for you to be associated with."

I listened between the three options and chose the sarcastic option (Kirito from SAO Abridged).

Irritating Voice: "Good! You chose a voice. From now on, you could just tell me what you want to choose."

Me: "Shit! I was looking forward to being mute for the rest of my life. Could you please just tell me what the hell is going on?"

Irritating voice: "Fine! My name is Artificial Neurological Intelligence of Development, Information, Objectives and Training for Gamers, but my friends call me ANIDIOT or they would of any of them were alive or could hear me in the first place. Nice to meet you Kitai!"

Me: "So your name is Idiot?"

IDIOT: "No! My name is..."

Me: "Try saying it slowly and where am I!"

IDIOT: "Oh you're Dead! You've been chosen to relive your life in a new and better world!"

Me: "What's with all the gamer crap then and why can't I remember anything?"

IDIOT: "Well the guy who pulled you into this world, loves playing games with people and now he has created one with you as his MC and the thing with your memories, I wasn't trusted with this information."

Me: "Thank you, useless IDIOT! Now, are we done with this whole "In total darkness bullshit" or are you still going to irritate me with your lovely voice?"

IDIOT: "Just a few more questions and I'll send the message that you are ready to start. Ok! It works like this, you're going to feel a little dizzy and the last memories that he could salvage will return to you, after that, I'm going to ask you questions and your going to answer them by saying the first character, race or class you think of as well as the game it comes from, alright? Ooook!"

Suddenly I felt seriously dizzy and a bunch of memories flooded into my head.

Me: "I didn't need to remember that!"

IDIOT: "Ooh! Did you remember your untimely, yet funny, death?"

Me: "No! I remembered the first time puberty hit me. Now can we start working on the..."

IDIOT: "Sorry! Time's up! You'll just have to do with the options he thought you would like. Bye now!"

Sudden darkness enveloped me and I suddenly felt really tired and after a lot of protests, I gave in and fell asleep.