Chapter Three: Fear

After waiting for approximately a number of minutes or hours that I do not know of, I saw my mana begin to restore itself. And I think it took around 2 hours? I tried keeping count of the mana going up per second, but it appeared to be completely random. Sometimes I would regain 2 mana at a time or I would not gain any for the next dozens of seconds. It was frustrating.

After my experiments, I could see that my intelligence stat was increasing bit by bit, but I don't feel any visible changes in myself. I think I could calculate my calculus questions easier than before, but I cannot confirm that right now. 

I also saw that by increasing my intelligence stat my mana stat also increases, and from basic math it seems that it's one point of intelligence for 5 points of mana. 

With these new discoveries I have now come to a crossroad. Do I continue experimenting and experience euphoria in my new found powers or do I continue? 

In a few hours I'm positive that I would begin to starve and considering my current blindness in my situation. I cannot afford to wait. The constant urge must have been from my [Instinct] earlier, and considering that its B in ranking I could trust it tremendously. I believe that I could take this risk, but first I want to test whether or not I could level up [Ice Control] first.

Though it seemed that after unlocking my [Status] I was able to go on without starving or needing as much. It feels almost inhuman. So I should be able to take the risk…

…

After around 3 hours or so, I was able to finally grind my [Ice Control] up to the next proficiency. 

[Ice Control (D) (1/500)]

The font became a bit fancier than before considering one of the brackets was missing, but that's not concerning right now. Just from the simple advancement I could feel that something in me has changed. It felt like something in me was free. 

My control of ice has also increased significantly as the speed at which I could output it seems to be faster than before. It's still a bit slower than an adult human swinging or throwing an object, but it seemed to come close to an adolescents strength. It was also much harder.

It was quite the decision of whether or not to continue spitting to increase the supply of liquid, but regardless I feel that I am now prepared. I need to act with caution and definitely not run in like a dumbass.

I gathered myself and breathed deeply. This would be a new experience and I may need to have some blood on my hands. Preparation for death is never easy, but I have faced it several times already. Maybe it could claim me now, but I want to learn more. 

With my confidence rolling I yelled, "AaaaahhhH!", like a dumbass in an attempt to boost up my own confidence. It felt fun though considering it might be my last.

After the energetic scream, I stood up and began to walk without making much noise on the ground. It was tippy-toeing but less silly, I think at least. I'm really starting to hate this damn blindness and lack of light. 

…

After around a day of walking I began to tire a bit, but I kept my guard up as I rested. I had created a blade using my blood and saliva from earlier, but it was less than 3 inches in length. It was not fragile since I almost broke my hand while punching it. My mana was being drained, but at a considerably less rate since my skill ranked up.

I chose the shape of a blade considering my previous experience with it, but the length was a bit too short for my liking. I could have made a spear if there were more liquid, but this is the best choice as of right now. My ice is also not hard enough to make a proper club yet either.

I continued rambling on in an attempt to preserve my sanity in the clear silence. 

…

It's been a day or so and I'm doubting whether or not I'm in a coma or not. My sanity is beginning to crumble and I have an urge to make a noise, any noise. Something to prove that I'm not dead yet, or something to show that I'm not asleep. My chin is starting to hurt from pinching it so much. 

…

I began to spam check my status screen, for the translucent light. It wasn't enough for me to see past anything behind or around it, but it was light. It was something I could see. 

…

It's been a few days and my body has not changed. Hell, I can't tell if I'm even human anymore. Should I have waited and grinded more then?

…

It's been a week since I started walking, and I'm slowly losing count of time. It could have been much longer, but there's no signs I can use to determine it.

The blood hasn't dried yet for some reason.

…

I don't know how long it's been since I started my journey. Walking felt natural to me, and I felt something calling out to me. I need to keep walking. 

…

I managed to regain my count, although it's probably missing a couple weeks or months of time. It's been approximately four months since I started to count again…

…

As I continued wandering, my [Instinct] shot up, and I felt something approaching. It could be an enemy, or maybe a friend. I continued walking forward, albeit much slower to determine the unknown object or creature. There was a light–and a horrendously ugly creature under it. 

It had green skin and it looked surprisingly normal until you reached its face. Its nose was uncharacteristically long and it had multiple warts on it. The eyes also had a creepy yellow color. It was also short, maybe the size of 140m? 

Regardless of my thoughts, my [Instinct] and my body acted upon its own accord. Prey was in sight and I had a mission to accomplish. A deep-rooted and primal urge came and went.

[Darting Ironthorn]

I adjusted the angle of my dagger midair and by using my [Ice Control] I was able to maneuver it at a much higher altitude than the creature. 

The angle was set, and my blade began to accelerate towards its victim. The target was its throat where the vocal cords were located to guarantee that there would be less noise made in its fall. 

With an audible drop the creature fell to the ground, dead. Blood oozed from its throat and shock was visible in its eye as it died from the lethal shock. 

[Goblin Killed x1]

My eyes began to brighten and redden at the sight of the blood. Adrenaline and euphoria rose, and I wanted more. Moremoremoremoremoremoremore…

Countless blades began to manifest around the boy's body, gleaming in murderous intent. The color was unidentifiable due to the lack of light. 

…

After an hour of hunting several goblins, I had slayed over 50. Each one unaware of the death that lurked next to them. 

My urge finally disappeared as I determined where I was. Several red blades by my side, lit by the clear torch that fell on the floor. Countless bodies were on the floor, each marked by a fallen torch. 

Maybe I'd miscounted because all I see is a sea of light. Each one lit by a fallen corpse and a torch by its side.

My mind began to blank out once more as my sanity waned,

"Haahahahahaah!"

…

After an unknown amount of time I woke up. My hands were filled with blood and there were countless red blades surrounding me. Each one was more than two feet long with an extremely complex eastern sword design. 

My mind trembled.

Memories started to arise within my mind, foreign yet familiar…

What did I do, why did I do that? Why was I… acting like a beast? Why did my body act like that? Am I being mind controlled? What was happening…

In a desperation to calm my mind I opened my [Status]...

-

[Status]:

[Race: Human/(?)

[Health: 500/500]

[Mana: 230/230]

[Strength: 9+15]

[Stamina: 9+12]

[Agility: 10+19]

[Dexterity: 12+21]

[Intelligence: 21+25]

[Will: 16 + 2]

[Skills: Instinct(B), Madness(C+), Swordsmanship(C), (NEW) Bloodlust[B]]

[Talents: Ice Control(D+) [190/750], Locked]

-

My mouth gaped as I stared at the status board. It was incredible. My sadness and fear was slowly being removed against my will, but I couldn't resist it. My amazement completely drowned my fear. Madness was lurking inside of me.

As I saw my new stats I tried using my [Ice Control] and to my surprise it could start to freeze my surroundings, even if just by a bit. The temperature around me went down near instantaneously, and if I continued I might be able to freeze it entirely. 

I didn't have any time to process my own actions and abilities when I heard that voice again.

[Mission Accomplished]

[Reward: Removal from punishment zone]

Then… the roof began to collapse above me.