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FOREARM WARRIOR

A fantasy parody heavily inspired by Dungeon and Dragons. Does this novel take itself seriously? Fuck no. Is it good? Probably not. A young hero with massive forearms goes on an adventure, after being kicked out of the house at 2 and a half years old.

GodOfGrammor · Fantasie
Zu wenig Bewertungen
12 Chs

A new master chp 7

The tubby little goblin continued to stare. In response MLML didn't hesitate, he let go of the branch and dropped. He landed hands first and his forearms easily withstood the fall. His hands bore into the earth as a counterbalance as he shot himself onto his feet.

The goblin was in obvious shock from the contorted look on his face.

MLML greeted him, "What do you desire Goblin, is it my coin, perhaps my wares? If so you will meet your end."

The Goblin put his hands up in an elastic fashion and shook them back and forth.

"No, No, good sir I was just watching, you have incredible strength to hang there for so long. I got here at sunrise and it's 12 PM already!"

"Well, I'd be a disappointment to my family if I couldn't do that much".

"Wait, Goblin, how are you speaking Common?"

"I'm not speaking common, I'm speaking my language?"

They both looked at each other in earnest confusion.

Then a lightbulb went off in MLML's head. It must be one of this new robes enchantments.

He then explained his thesis to the Goblin.

"Hey, Mr. Goblin, what's your name?"

"Oh, it's uhm, Goblee! Nice to meetcha!"

"I'm MLML, nice to meet you too. I come from Greenflower a day from here to the Northeast".

"Never heard of it, I'm kinda lost you could say. I'm a good couple 100 miles away from my village. I banged the chief's wife, and he wasn't happy, before he could behead me I skipped town."

"I wasn't asking for your TMI-filled backstory, but okay."

It was at this moment that Goblee had a strange look of motivation deep inside his yellow eyes that shined amber in the morning sun.

"Train me to become stronger, I can tell you are one with great physical prowess, that robe won't hide the fact that you hung from that tree for hours. If I don't become stronger the chief might track me down and kill me. I need strength.

MLML thought to himself, well he never had thought about training anyone. He had in a way helped train his late friend, Craig. That was more of a friendship than a master and student relationship though. It was also kind of weird for a 2-and-a-half-year-old to be a master of a Goblin in the middle of his years. He came to a conclusion, fuck it why not. Maybe this would lead him to become stronger, or maybe it wouldn't might as well try.

"Fuck it, yeah sure, one problem though, never mind actually 2. You're a goblin most humans will try to kill you on sight. 2 You are going to have to pay from my forearm wisdom. 5 copper a day, no more, no less".

Goblee seems to think about it for a moment, then gives his 2 cents. "Well, I don't have any money. Can I owe you a debt, till I can pay you?"

"Yeah, I guess that's fine".

"I could wear a cloak whenever we go into human cities and stuff as well"

"That should work".

That's when Goblee got down on his hands and knees. He was still just barely taller than MLML.

"Take good care of me master MLML"

That was the start of an apprenticeship that would alter the course of this world's history.