self-motivation to love

Respect them.

What?

Her feelings -

Or yours?

To not be selfish;

I don't say it but -

Green orbs of glistening meadows,

Charmed; my heart is mellow.

Lament, they are from loving him so,

Marred; my heart was whole.

Manipulation glopped his tête-à-tête,

For she followed him in all the ways.

Succumbing to his ignorant cries,

She accepted my advice, however it was a demise,

As she choose to be by his side. 

To the traces of verbatim;

Coaxing my lessons towards aggression,

Of second chances,

Not worth her romances.

I stayed and prayed,

In hopes that everyday,

She was okay.

Maybe that she would notice my -

She didn't.

And she still doesn't.

I usually laugh at the ridiculousness now of all that's happened back then. An extra side of boisterous since they aren't lips on lips. In my opinion though, me not telling her my feelings is out of respect for her in due to going through several harsh circumstances. Plus I also believe me not saying anything, isn't an extra mountain on her shoulders. If I did, that is extra Mount Everest coated with extra coconut. That's respect for her.

Sweet but cold as batshit crazy.

On my side of the story, it's respectful to my feelings if I say something? (I am sure but not sure) But I consider that selfish - it means I'm getting extra bondage off my shoulders and dumping that trash load on hers.

Friends say I should say something and stop being stubborn, others say it's my way of loving her.

Some sort of motivation.