GONE WITH THE WIND BONKERS

"Welcome home, Princess!"

I don't remember ever being this surprised before in my life.

Okay, you know those moments when the birthday girl comes home and everyone jumps out of hiding shouting happy birthday? This was a weird version of something like that.

I looked around feeling somewhat bewildered. It was a, "But it's not my birthday" moment. And also the feeling of finding yourself at a costume party without a costume kind of moment too - all at the same time.

My living room was a full house right now, but my family wasn't in sight, not unless you counted my betas. Now that they were standing in a neat row next to me, I realized they were all in their neatly pressed dark navy blue beta suits, all three of them.

I mean, Ki and Harvey were at school with me, so they were suited for active duty or whatever they called it, but Ben was suited too, and we were at home.

{What's going on?} I asked Ben. Like seriously. Did I miss a memo? Were we going somewhere? Wth was going on?

Why were they all suited up? Why were the other guys suited too?

Because Wolfgang and Ink were also all decked in matching suits, except that the dark blue of their suits took a greyer hue. I'm sure they were all in Betamen.

And why was Stephan here? He was in his warrior uniform, Theo and Owen by his side.

{Don't look at me.} Ben deadpanned (although I wasn't), {You were the one who asked Wolfgang to tutor you.}

Yes, but what had that got to do with you guys dressed to the nines and posing like a mini parade in my living room? Were you guys even allowed into this side of the house?

I cast a quick glance at the door. Was Sabre home? I hated that my wolf radar couldn't pick up human presence. Mum said Sabre didn't like having strange men around. What if she came down and started screaming?

For some reason, the memory of the preschooler shrieking in terror and my Mum turning mama bear at my wolves filled me with real fear. One would hurt my ears, who knew what the other one might do? I would be defenseless against both.

We really shouldn't be here. Maybe we could just all step back out onto the porch and re-enter the house from the pool room.

I glanced back, but my exit was sealed with those sheer curtains that billowed like the background of a dream. I think they were weighted so they wouldn't flip up in the wind, just billow like the wings of a cicada fluttering.

"Good afternoon, Princess." Bell smirked. He was the only one not in uniform, his light grey Lorent Prince suit and snow white sling, his swept-back hair, the dark crimson stone in his ear...

I couldn't help but notice how very, very, handsome my soulmate was.

I think I must still be in shock, "H...hi."

Bell leaned towards me and touched my hair. I backed away immediately because I suddenly remembered krakening and kissing him last night in front of everyone.

I hoped my face was not as red as it was hot right now.

Wolfgang stepped forwards now, his blond hair shone like finely spun gold where the sunlight fell on it.

The Spring breeze blew in, and the white day curtains billowed harder behind me.

"Your men have made effort to welcome you home, Princess." Wolfgang informed me, "How should you respond to their greeting?"

Urm... "Thank you?" I hazarded.

I felt a little like a pup being asked, "Now what do you say?"

It's almost always "thank you". Or else it would be "I'm sorry", but I was quite sure I hadn't punched anyone...yet.

Ben snorted at my answer. I hit him with the back of my hand. So much for not punching anyone, but it was totally by reflex, really. And no, I wasn't sorry.

Wolfgang frowned a little, his blond brow knitting downwards, and then he instructed, "When an alpha returns home, all members of his household and staff should be present to welcome their alpha back. At their 'Welcome home, Alpha,' it would be customary to respond with the words, 'I'm home.' And to convey the Princess' thanks, 'Thank you for your care.'"

Yeah, what he said.

But now my wolves were all looking at me expectantly.

"I'm home. Thank you for your care." I mumbled.

This was a lot harder than, "Thank you."

By now, Barry, Torque, Cobra, Fluffy, and EJ had also let themselves into the living room. They were still in their warrior jackets since they just got back with the convoy, but their jackets were zipped up properly and worn in such a way that they actually looked like uniforms.

"Good." Wolfgang nodded his approval like we had passed some kind of test, "In the future, whenever weather permitting, this ceremony should be carried out on the porch. Head Beta, you may give your last instructions and dismiss the men now."

Wolfgang then stepped back in line with my other wolves and Ben stepped forwards, "Those of you who just got back, follow Ink to my basement for your fittings. The rest of you return to your duties. Dismiss."

Ben said everything in his usual deadpan, but I couldn't help but suspect he was enjoying his moment.

And then all my wolves bowed and said in one resounding and masculine chorus, "Thank you for your guidance, Princess."

Which was so super duper weird.

I was so weirded out, I would have laughed out loud, except that I didn't dare.

A part of me hoped Mum would show up now and chase my wolves back to our side of the house. And there was also another part just waiting for my wolves to burst out laughing and tell me that this was just a super elaborate and dumb prank.

This was all a really new experience for me. I mean, usually I was the one grinning while someone else stood there stunned stupid.

Now the tables were turned and I was the fool frozen in the middle of the living room while my wolves moved around me. Not the best feeling.

Bell was the one to leave first, "See you at the Cadence, Princess."

I didn't want him to go, but I was also relieved at the same time. I just felt the heart palpitations were not helping anything right now.

I did breathe in just a bit deeper, as if to hold on to his scent longer. Mmmm...

Stephan, Theo, and Owen also made polite bows to exit with Bell. Oh right, they were due for the cadence later... Maybe they were here to meet Bell to prepare for the Cadence.

Maybe I should be preparing for the Cadence! Wth was I wasting time standing around for?

The other warriors left single-file after that. Passing through the day curtains to cross the road to the Beta House.

Ki moved away to the coffee table where a glass teapot sat on a warmer. He poured tea and mixed in the milk and sugar.

"This way, Princess." Wolfgang gestured to one of the sofas.

I nodded dumbly and sat down.

"Thank you." I said this quite automatically when Ki placed my tea in front of me.

I sensed Mum from the hallway, but by now, there was only Wolfgang and my betas left. We really shouldn't be using my family's living room.

Mum entered the living room. I felt a little relieved that the small human wasn't in sight.

"Luna is here." Harvey announced, and all the guys bowed politely.

"Oh my." Mum smiled, neither surprised nor adverse to having my wolves in our living room, "Please, no need to stand on ceremony. Good afternoon, Sir Wolfgang."

"Good afternoon, Luna." Wolfgang executed a perfectly elegant bow.

"Everyone's dressed up today, is something happening?" Mum asked.

"Just the Packland Cadence, Luna." Ki picked up the teapot.

Yes! The cadence! I had to prepare for the cadence! Why were we having tea?

Mum settled herself on the sofa opposite me, "Welcome home, Sam."

Huh? Wait... Wth was with all this welcoming to my own home?

"Princess, your Luna mother is here to partake afternoon tea with you." Wolfgang narrated.

My who now? Mum beamed.

"It would be appropriate to approach her and greet her." Wolfgang prompted me, "A 'Mother, I'm home.' would suffice. Any brief physical affection would also be appropriate."

What kind of period drama was Wolfgang directing? I stood up and shuffled awkwardly over to where Mum had seated herself, "I'm home."

"Welcome home, Sam." Mum repeated with a smile. She reached over and gave me a quick hug, "How was your day?"

Okay... For some reason, Mum was starring in Wolfgang's period drama a lot more naturally than I was.

"It was okay." I answered. And then I paused and looked to Wolfgang. I felt quite sure that "okay" was wrong. Maybe I was supposed to say, "I had the most excellent day, mother dearest."

But Wolfgang didn't say anything. He only stood there poised just next to my armchair.

"Please, would you boys like to join us?" Mother dearest asked graciously, "You don't have to stand on formality at home. We are all family after all."

Yes. Exactly.

Wait. We were? I looked at Ben, Harvey, and Ki. Okay, yes. Betas were family too. But Wolfgang.

And then I remembered my harem.

"Thank you, Luna, but I'm afraid we have to excuse ourselves to prepare for the cadence later." Harvey answered. He looked at me, "Is there anything else I can do for you, Princess?"

What happened to Alpha? Wth? How did I suddenly get demoted?

I shook my head wordlessly.

Harvey and Ben bowed, "Thank you for your guidance, Princess."

And they left. Ki also bowed, "Please excuse me too."

"Oh, of course, Ki. You must be busy too." Mum smiled, "Thank you for your hard work."

"It is and will always be my pleasure, Luna." Ki insisted smiling like a flower to the sun.

"May I help you with anything else, Princess?" Ki asked.

Looks like I had lost my goddess status too. Wth was happening?

I shook my head, but then I remembered, "I need an LBD for tonight and silver-colored accessories. And I'm supposed to post a picture of Lucky on my channel for Zara..."

And then I remembered what Lucky looked like now, "But it has to be of Lucky in the correct size."

No one was going to believe Lucky was a hamster now.

"And an LBD is a little black dress." I explained in afterthought, you know, just in case Ki was too posh to understand.

And then I remembered, "And thank you for the mini eclairs too. Marcus said it was the first to finish at my class party." I reported to Ki belatedly. I didn't get to eat any! T.T (but I didn't tell him that.)

"You're very welcome, princess." Ki smiled, "Rest assured, I will have the rest of it taken care of immediately."

"Thank you." I grinned back. Well, no... It wasn't urgent actually...

"Oh, Sam!" Mum said primly.

Okay! I'm not sure why, but hearing "Oh, Sam!" made me feel suddenly relieved.

I looked expectantly over and waited for Mum to give me flak for giving Ki extra work over dumb things like posting my pet's picture, or not being responsible for basic personal things like what I'm wearing to a party. I'm sure Ki was busy with more important matters too.

Sigh. Everything had just been weird since I stepped into the house today!

"Please sit properly!" Mum reminded me over her tea cup.

I blinked. I had propped myself up on my knees and turned in my seat to talk to Ki over the armrest.

I dropped back into my seat and straightened my skirt. Ki quickly sidestepped so I could face him while seated, "Apologies, Princess."

I shook my head. It wasn't his fault! "No, it's not you Ki."

And then biting back a smile, I added, "It's me... You deserve better than this."

I think I just had about enough of Wolfgang's period drama. If we had to recite scripted lines, let's go with cliché break-up lines.

Mum sighed, "What will I ever do with you Sam?"

Ki bowed himself out, "Thank you for your guidance, Princess."

But he was smiling. One of his rare real smiles, "I only live to serve you."

And he was gone too.