THE FEAR OF MISSING OUT

"I don't believe Hua Zong would just offer you a modeling job for no reason," Xuan Tianmei lamented as she set the table for dinner.

Xuan Tianyi smiled, then teased her as he sat on one of the dining chairs, "Ah Pretty Mei, are you jealous?"

Xuan Tianmei scoffed. She took a seat across from him and picked up her chopsticks. "I'm not jealous. You're my younger brother after all, and I want the best for you."

Xuan Tianyi put some food in his mouth and rolled his eyes. However, he wasn't in the mood to point out the obvious fact that she was only fifteen minutes older than himself for the umpteenth time, so he said nothing.

After chewing a mouthful of food, Xuan Tianmei called in a whiny voice, "Xiao Shuai."

"En?" he answered flippantly.

"Did you flirt with President Hua?"

Xuan Tianyi shifted uncomfortably on his seat but said nothing. He could feel a scolding coming.

"I knew it," Xuan Tianmei said, slamming her chopsticks on her bowl. She didn't see any other reason Hua Zhendan would take notice of him.

Even if Hua Zhendan were gay, which she seriously doubted, Hua Zhendan didn't seem like the kind of guy who let his libido affect his judgment to Xuan Tianmei.

Still, as she'd seen Xuan Tianyi's flirting skills firsthand — many times before, she knew how powerful his sex appeal was.

Xuan Tianyi's sex appeal was probably strong enough to make a just person's judgment suddenly incorrigible.

With a frown on her face, she asked him, "Is that why he offered you a job?"

Xuan Tianyi chuckled, "I wish." He shoved some food into his mouth before he continued. "He wasn't interested in me at all."

"That's because he isn't gay." She continued, "And can you please stop flirting with everything that has a dick? I'm embarrassed."

Xuan Tianyi shook his head in disagreement. "He is 100% gay, Tianmei. If you have any feelings for him, there's no better time than now to squash them. Before they grow stronger than they are."

"Who has feelings for him?" Xuan Tianmei asked, her question countering the pink blush that was starting to spread across her face as she picked up her chopsticks to continue eating. "How would you know if he were gay for sure anyway?" she asked.

Xuan Tianyi paused, thought about it for a while, then shrugged his shoulders. "My gaydar has never failed me before." He's flirted with more men than he could count, none of those many men had punched him in the face. If he were honest, he'd admit to being impressed with Hua Zhendan, resisting his charms without difficulty. In Xuan Tianyi's memory, that was 'probably' a first.

"Is he a top or a bottom then?" Xuan Tianmei asked, curious.

"Probably a top," Xuan Tianyi said. He almost smirked at how Xuan Tianmei assumed having a strong gaydar automatically meant you could tell outright if a person is a top or a bottom.

Xuan Tianyi has met twinks who're tops. He's also topped guys who were seemingly bigger, and more dominant than himself in the past. In truth, he found it difficult to believe anyone was entirely a top or a bottom. Maybe Hua Zhendan was versatile as well. If he wasn't so intimidated by Hua Zhendan, he might've dared to imagine it.

Worried for Xuan Tianmei, his mind drifted to the rumor about herself and Hua Zhendan. "That rumor at the office —"

"Isn't true," Xuan Tianmei interrupted him before he could finish what he was saying.

"Then why do you blush every time I mention it?"

"Well… I've never been the subject of that kind of rumor before."

"Oh! I forgot you've never had a boyfriend before."

"That," Xuan Tianmei paused. "Isn't true either."

Xuan Tianyi shrugged. He really wouldn't know. She was very personal about her private life. "Still I don't need to tell you that having a crush on a gay guy is as good as wittingly banging your head against a wall, right?"

"Save your advice. I don't need it. I really don't like Hua Zong in that way."

Xuan Tianyi didn't believe her. Hua Zhendan was rich, good-looking and smart. Unless he intimidated Xuan Tianmei in the way he did him, Xuan Tianyi couldn't see how any straight girl in their right mind would not like him in that way?

As Xuan Tianyi watched Xuan Tianmei, he saw an inconspicuous emotion that could've been either fear or panic flit across her face.

"What's the matter?" he asked her.

"I can't believe you flirted with my boss," she complained.

Xuan Tianyi frowned.

"What if he were straight, got offended, and fired me?"

"I didn't know he was your boss,"

"As if that'd stopped you," she scoffed.

Xuan Tianyi sighed. "Contrary to what you think, I don't sleep with everyone I meet."

"Really?"

"Really," he defended himself, "We talked about this last night."

"I don't remember."

"Well, I said I draw the line at rich people. If I don't know you're rich, I don't mind spending the night with you. But once I know who you are, well, I draw the line."

"Disgusting," Xuan Tianmei remarked, and Xuan Tianyi smirked. "So you've drawn a line between you and Hua Zhendan?"

"I have," Xuan Tianyi said. Although he didn't, he very much wanted to add 'Moreover, he intimidates me.'

Xuan Tianmei's phone beeped. She stared at it and frowned.

"What's it?" Xuan Tianyi who didn't seem to miss any changes in Xuan Tianmei's expression asked.

"Nothing," Xuan Tianmei shook her head. She stood up and placed her bowl of unfinished rice porridge in the kitchen sink. Although she knew she'd return to meet the dishes unwashed, she still said to Xuan Tianyi, "I've got to meet up with someone. Please help me do the dishes when you're done eating."

"Who are you going to meet?" Xuan Tianyi asked.

"No-one you know," Xuan Tianmei replied picking up her purse and heading for the door.

"You know you can introduce me to your boyfriend, right?" Xuan Tianyi quickly concluded that maybe the reason she didn't like Hua Zhendan was that she already had someone. "I promise I won't seduce him."

"Fuck you," Xuan Tianmei said, opened the door and left the house.

When Xuan Tianyi finished eating, he picked up his empty bowl and dumped it on Xuan Tianmei's bowl in the kitchen sink. He filled a glass with water from the tap and drank it. He placed the half-empty glass on the dining table and made his way to the single couch in the middle of the living room.

Laying down on the sofa, he closed his eyes and let himself fantasize about being rich and living in a big ass house with his sister and cute puppies running around.

As Xuan Tianyi was a pessimistic person, fantasizing wasn't an endeavor he indulged in. But at the moment, he felt as if Hua Zhendan had given him the right to fantasize about being wealthy when he had given him that offer.

To strangers, he had never been good for anything more than meaningless sexual encounters. To have someone look at him and see someone who could make something of himself was a little too phenomenal. Didn't people say that if it seems as though it's too good to be true, then it probably is?

He couldn't help feeling like If he did call the number on the card that he wanted to accept the offer, it would turn out to be some cruel prank.

Thinking about the ridiculous job offer, Xuan Tianyi didn't know when he fell asleep.