22

Midoriya

"Daddy! Don't leave, please! I'll do better! I'll get a quirk somehow," I screamed only for him to burn me with his fire.

"You're useless, you shouldn't have ever been born." He turned and went out the door leaving me home all alone, burned and hungry. Does mommy feel the same way too? The sound of glass shattering filled my ears.

I went to my room where Mommy left the computer on and I pulled up the video of All Might rescuing all of those people. I won't be able to be a hero like him will I?

Mom came in and I asked her, instead of answering though she just held me crying. No, Mom that's not what I want. Mommy I need you to tell me that everything is going to be alright, that I can still follow my dreams, even quirkless.

But that never happens. I'm alone, I'm weak, I'm useless.

***

Pain, so much pain. Kacchan leaving me that day at the tree, telling me that I was useless and not his friend anymore. The shattering of glass rained down on me. Everyday brought more and more pain, but nothing hurt nearly so much as that day.

Kacchan burning me, chasing me around with his friends. The burns hurt less and less each time even though I knew that they should be hurting more, not less. The blast and explosions were getting bigger and leaving larger and larger burns on my clothes but the burns on my skin never really matched my clothes. How does that happen?

I'm all alone now, Kacchan made sure to keep everyone away from me. There was once that I thought a girl was being nice and giving me a carton of milk and Kacchan dumped it out of my hand before I could take a drink. It was bad and I almost drank it but Kacchan knocked it out of my hands. On some level is he still protecting me?

I'm alone but I'm safe, well for the most part.

Why is my heart hurting? Why does it always hurt when I think of him? When he isn't around, whenever he tells me to die. All I feel is numbed pain. I work so hard, learning as much as I can about everything that I can but I still find myself smiling.

Why do I smile? I came home from school one day and found Mom crying begging someone to please just come home. I know who it is. It's Dad. She still loves him, I never told her about him burning me. How could I?

I feel the tears streaming down my face but quickly wipe them away and put on my biggest smile before walking into the kitchen, knowing that she hung up a long time ago.

"I love you Mom," I reach up and give her a kiss on the cheek and the sound of shattering glass fills my ears again. I can't let her know about what is happening at school, I can't. I will just make things harder on her.

I go up and study even harder, I start keeping notebooks not only for my school work but also on heroes and villains quirks. I'll make my dreams come true one way or another, no one will stop me.

I'm alone, I'm weak and I'm useless but I'm alive. I will succeed.

***

I broke another bone, Mom took me to the hospital, again. An older boy had gotten a hold of me on the way home after school today. It hurt, it hurts so much. But I can't let Mom know about the bullying, it will only make her worry more. I just told her that I fell down some stairs and landed weird, I don't think she really believes me but she isn't pushing it anymore. I think she knows.

I hate middle school, but soon enough I'll be going to UA High. I will make it too. I promised myself, even without a quirk I will be a hero.

"Oi Nerd!" I flinched away and started running, I can't get hurt again so soon after the hospital. Mom will worry. The shattering glass filled my ears all while Kacchan chased me with his friends.

***

"Take a swan dive," Kacchan says so many things and honestly it doesn't even hurt anymore. I can see his eyes shifting and land on all the older bullies, the ones with dangerous quirks that could actually hurt me.

He burns my clothes but the burning on my skin, well I can barely feel it at all. broken pieces of glass are falling all around us but no one seems to see them. I can't even react to them. It's like it isn't happening at all.

Kacchan throws notebook #13 out the window and into the fountain before leaving, still laughing his friends following close behind. The other bullies having already left the room leaving me all alone.

I am alone, I am weak and I am useless.

There was a deafening crash as a large piece of glass crashed right in front of me. I kept walking and go down to fish out my notebook and maybe try and save it.

***

I'm all alone walking through a back ally way to get home and maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to slip past Kacchan and his friends without being spotted? It was a long shot but one that I needed to bet on. Mom would be home soon so I need to be changed and cook dinner before she gets home.

I get grabbed and I have something thick and gooey filling my ears, mouth and nose. I could hear his voice telling me I was his hero.

How could my dream be trampled so thoroughly by a villain? Is this what it's like to die? Is this what it means to finally feel the pain fade away? Always alone, should have known I would die all alone.

I am just a useless Deku.

I woke up coughing and sputtering and my things still spread out on the ground. I quickly get up and gather my things and find my autograph notebook open, I look up and there is All Might.

We talk for what could have been nothing more than a few seconds and I find out I have his autograph and he goes to leave and I just can't let him go. I have one more question, one more question that I needed to know the answer to!

I went flying through the air with All Might and when we land on a roof I finally ask him the question that I needed the answer to more than anything else in the world.

"Can I still be a hero without a quirk?" I held my breath and I feel like I was sucker punched with his answer. No, I couldn't really hear much of what he said after that, not with the number of mirrors, windows and glass in general falling all around me shattering. The grains of sand that were there before exploding with each new addition. I barely really register that All Might turns into such an old tiny man, it's so hard to notice with all of the noise.

They broke, shattering grinding themselves into the ground below me. All Might left me there on the roof and I just look around me, it's not lost on me that All Might left me exactly where I needed to be if I was going to do what Kacchan told me that I should do.

My ears are ringing from all of the shattering glass but I turn to the stairs anyway. I know Kacchan would never actually want me gone, it just hurts so much.

I'm alone, I'll always be alone.

I'm weak, I'll never be able to be strong.

I'm useless, I'll always be a useless Deku.

I'm walking home when I hear the commotion going on and see Kacchan was trapped by the same sludge villain, All Might had just saved me from a little while ago.

This is all my fault! I can't not run, I can't think. I can't let him hurt. Not like that, never like that! I can't let him die!" I tore at the villain and I managed to free his mouth enough that he is able to cough a little and actually suck in air, breathing. The memory of sufficating still fresh in my memory when we get hit by a rush of air and I turn to see All Might. He saves us, me again.

***

Something more changed than I know about, Kacchan doesn't say anything at all to me anymore. I want to reach out and touch him, let him know that I am here.

Please look at me, I am here.

I AM HERE!

But he never turns around, he just keeps going. The bullies have finally stopped but now it is almost worse. No one even acknowledges that I am here, not unless the teacher calls on me.

I see the looks they give each other before they just turn away again. Training with All Might takes up all of my time but that doesn't stop it from hurting. The work outs, the extra projects, the dieting. I hate it all, but if it will let me be a hero then fine. I'll walk through the gates of hell and maybe I won't be alone anymore?

But that can't happen. Not now. I am just a useless Deku, but if All Might says that I can...

"No," his words echo through my head. No, I am still alone, still weak, still useless.

But I don't want to be.

Kacchan, I'm coming, please don't leave me again.