Among Stars - 1

[Gabriel pov]

I felt a sapphic taste, sweet yet with a tinge of something more. It took my lips, my first.

Yet as it deepened, furthering the passion within. I could feel nothing but the love, the devotion poured through her lips and upon mine. Answered ten fold. A passion that spoke no words, spent no tales.

A senseless passion that spoke only of love, of… of some higher emotion. Yet every moment, every second that I observed, every single one felt grander than the next. A sort of passage through the veil of childhood.

My eyes closed, a tightening that brought to mind inadequacy, that I could not truly block everything, that I could not give my all to this clear show of affection.

I could tell, just by the experience, that she and so too I were new to this. A sort of frenzied passion that could only be found in those of newly bought love.

Yet as I blocked off my sight, the very visage of souls that I had traded. Wind, stale air that roved around the room. It fell short to the wonderful experience that I beheld in my very body. 

And when we parted, a breath taken in desire, the need for air. Where my sight once more gazed upon her own soul. Blazing with such fury and fire.

"That…" I muttered, finger touching lip. 

Another, holding my wrist, placing my hand upon her waist. The other, shushing my thoughts with naught but a dexterous touch.

And when I silenced myself, tilting my head in askance. She took that opportunity to search through my body, hand groping at parts both private and public. At cloths she had bought for me and ones gifted upon my body by my sister.

Ripped from me with a ravenous touch. One that trailed finger after finger, groping touch after groping touch.

A passion that I did not resist.

"No" I shook my head, pulling away, for I knew what she wanted of me. And no matter the desire that roamed through my mind. I- I just couldn't devote myself that much.

I had thought and thought wrong.

For with every trailing touch, every roaming grab. There was a hesitance, a gut filled anxiety that told me no, that I should pull away.

And so I did, fulfilling the logical part of me, the one that grew to be so reserved. Touching finger upon another book. Hand grabbing another pen, already filled with ink.

"Of course, by your leave." I could tell the hesitance in her voice, the silk that had suffused her body leaving, parting within the moment.

"Yes, and truly… Thank you, for the gift. I will treasure it."

And when I looked upon the growing back of her soul. A face that never lied. I found a parting glance. One that carried with it a certain unwillingness, one that wanted nothing more to say.

And all I could think. All that rose through my mind was the simple thought.

'Was my sight always like that?'

When she left, well and truly gone from my sight. A slap echoed through the room, one of my own making as I turned hand against my own cheek.

Chastising myself.

For ruining the happiness of my other. That my own desire, my own logic had won over her own desires. It was…

'No' Once again I rose, managing by some miracle to close the distance between another book.

This was not the time to think of such things. As the artifact read passage after passage. Of calculations and history. 

Of great figures.

And of the passing time. One that took with it the leaves, the winter bareness of their limbs. Falling upon one another for the slightest hint of sustenance.

That was what it was.

A month that had passed, of the reading of the weather. A growing relationship with the father I had come to know.

Of his soft voice as he spoke of the seasons passing, of the trees and ground that had grown warmer.

And of his own experiences, spoken with such a soft voice. Of reminiscence.

A whole month of nothing but struggles and studying. Penship and memorization. Problems that one such as my age should know.

That had been cut from my education because of my disability. Yet as he left, a warm tinge to his soul. One that had found peace in his voice.

Another took his place. One that had hid herself from view. And one that I had only seen one other time.

At the secret parting of her daughter. Whence she went and caught up with the carriage that had been sent before her. To keep appearances of course.

She sat next to me, her hand placed over my hair, rubbing it with delicate care. Even as I tensed, as… well most of my experiences with her were not exactly what one would call pleasant.

Most of the time she was stern, one of those no nonsense people that did not take no for an answer. 

It was why I tensed before leaning into her touch, practically purring. It was like she had some sort of power. 

As no matter my dislike of her attitude she had this magic touch that made it impossible to part from her.

"The carriage is waiting."

She spoke, her voice carrying with it a tinge of something. An emotion I could not divine.

"Today?" I asked, for I had thought it tomorrow that I was to leave.

"Yes, it may be hasty but I would prefer that you…" She paused, pushing me closer into her embrace. Letting her hand fall over my shoulder.

"I would prefer that you familiarize yourself with the surroundings and aide that I had sent for you. A professor at the academy that will help with both your testing and general studies."

I blinked, once twice, almost looking at her with disbelief. Yet when the thought came I crushed it with ruthless efficiency.

"I- Thank you."

"Of course, it is a matter of need."

"Still, it must have taken much for you to pull those strings. And for that I thank you. The effort."

I felt her hand still, left upon the scalp of my head and bunched with force.

"Yes," She rose, taking my hand in hers, "Come, you leave now."

I nodded and held closely to her hand. Letting the warmth that she lent to me take effect. All as I rose into the carriage. Placed upon the seat as I should be. 

And as a last parting, "I've seen your recent practices… They were perfect. Maintain that."

"I will and thank you, for the praise." I smiled, turning my mind to the window. To the bird that had perched itself upon my arm. Letting the memory of her injuries wash over me, just as the pain did.