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a rough story getting a rewrite

You had it all but lost it due to factors outside of your control. Granted a new life in a world that defies physics, you know your clan is fated to fall. You find yourself with a sister fated to die. Do you control fate? Or does it control you? REWRITE IS FINALLY HAPPENING! (Slowly) The story may have holes due to having never read the manga; comment on any changes or things you want to see! It's a comedy/Adventure with a good amount of AU details. (at least, I hope. I wouldn't say I'm a good author yet, but I'm better than I was!)

cluelessauthor · Anime und Comics
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34 Chs

A Stabby Toy

I ran down the stairs of the Kage's tower as fast as I could without falling. I knew there was no way to catch up with Kushina. I could only guess where she went. 

My best guess was home; where else would a saddened child go to find comfort? I'd have a harder time guessing if she were an adult, but kids are pretty predictable. It took me longer than I wanted to make it home, but it's not like I can force my body to grow faster.

That gave me an idea: could Nature Energy do that? I tossed the question aside for later; it wasn't important now. 

I finally made it home and saw the gate was open, proving my guess was correct. I entered the house and followed the sounds of sobbing to her room. 

It was a rather spartan space with a typical tatami mat bed, a single dresser, and a chest with old-looking toys. A moving ball was under the covers, with a few dolls between the bed and chest.

"Kushina, can you come out, You know?"

Between her sniffles, she let out a muffled reply. "No."

"Fine, I'm going in then."

I walked over and crawled into the ball of blankets she had buried herself under. She was clutching a red-haired doll which loosely resembled a person. She had snot running out of one side of her nose and tear stains on her face.

"What made you run away, you know?"

I crawled closer to her and wiped away her snot with my shirt. Afterwards, I wrapped her in a big hug. "I don't wanna *sob* leave you here. I -I don't wanna *sniffle* go."

"Can you keep a secret? I'll tell you if you won't tell Mom." I felt her nod against my chest.

"I'm going to convince Suto to let me come with you. If everything goes well, Ashita and I will go to Konohagakure with you."

She let go of her doll and wrapped her arms in a hug. "Thanks for trying to cheer me up, but *sniffle* there is no way you can convince Suto-sama. I don't want to leave, you know."

"Your otouto has something he can't refuse. It's better than the rings I made."

This comment seemed to stun her out of her tears. "What?! How? What did you make?! Is this what you've been working on all year?"

I mentally chucked at how fast she could get sidetracked.

I pulled her into a tight hug before answering her. "I made a new seal, and yes, it is what I've been hiding so stubbornly. I won't tell you what it is, but it should greatly impact the higher-ups."

We just sat in silence under the blanket while Kushina got a grip on her emotions. When she was ready, she tapped my back twice. I released her, and she threw back the blankets, revealing her tear-stained face.

To my surprise, she whipped her face and accurately guessed my new seal. "It's a power source of some kind, isn't it."

I didn't even try to deny it; I didn't want to get tackled for that. "How did you know?"

"You were researching attracting seals for months, then suddenly switched to containment. It wasn't that hard to put the two together."

I frowned slightly but provided a brief explanation of how my seals worked. "I modified the chakra attracting seal, so it now works on attracting a different energy which has similar properties to chakra."

"Wow! With that, you might convince them to let you go! You're the best!" 

I received another hug from her, only this time, I swear she was trying to crack my ribs. "Don't. Kill. Me. Please. Mercy."

I barely squeaked out my words before she dropped me. Knowing this was my best shot, I initiated my ploy to unlock my chakra.

While slightly out of breath, I told her to get changed. I had another surprise for her. I also took this chance to exchange my snotty shirt for a clean one.

Soon, we were heading out towards the blacksmith. I wanted to give Kushina her birthday gift early.

The two of us jogged there. Well, not quite. Kushina jogged, and I sprinted to keep up with her.

We opened the door, and the shopkeeper welcomed us, "Welcome back, Kane, Kushina. What can I do for you today, you know?"  "Hi, Mariko!" Kushina greeted her back in her bubbly voice. 

"Hi, Mariko. Can I pick up the item I ordered? I was told it should be ready today." "Of course!"  She disappeared to the back of the store, leaving Kushina and me alone with all the sharp, pointy things.

We wasted no time picking up the weapons around the store. Trying to spin kunai and shuriken around our fingers, swinging around tanto and kunai, and ogling the fuma shuriken.

Two minutes later, Mariko returned, and we quickly put away our stabby toys. She was carrying a nearly all-black short sword with a few parts dyed bright red to match Kushina's hair. The Samigawa, Sageo and Kashira had all been dyed to match her hair.

The sword was 24" long while sheathed, so it would perfectly fit inside her storage ring. The Sageo was removable, and I had asked for the Hamon pattern to be inspired by a whirlpool. It was a tough task, but they accepted. I hadn't seen how it turned out yet, so I was just as excited as Kushina to see the final product.

She set the sword on the counter. "One custom chakra metal ninjato, you know. The smith couldn't make the Hamon pattern the way he wanted, but it is still on theme." I gestured for Kushina to take the blade. "Happy early birthday Nee-san. I hope you like it."

I knew she would like it, but she never used a weapon in the anime, so I still had doubts. These doubts grew the longer she stayed silent. I was about to say something when she tackled me to the ground in a giant hug.

If I were any other 2-year-old, I would probably have received a broken bone from the impact on the ground and the intensity of her hug. Thankfully, I was a Uzumaki, so all I'd end up with was a few bruises.

"You're the best, Kane! I'll practice really hard with it, you know! This is the best gift ever!"

I laughed at her behaviour. "You haven't even checked out the sword, you know."

She nodded her head and finally released me. We got up, and she drew the sword from its scabbard.

When we saw the hamon, we were blown away by its beauty. The line was in the shape of a series of waves, and for every 3rd wave, the crest would form a small whirlpool. I wasn't sure what to expect, but the results were amazing.

"It's beautiful," Kushina said quietly before sheathing the sword and stowing it in her ring. She hugged me tightly, "Thank you, Kane; I'll be sure to take good care of it."

I hugged her back, of course. "You better, it was expensive. But you don't have to use it if it doesn't suit you. It can be just a backup, too."

With my order picked up, we started to walk back, but I stopped her halfway. "I want you to help unlock my chakra." 

Kushina looked at me very seriously. "Kane, awakening your chakra shouldn't be done so early. It can have negative problems on your future if you overwork yourself."

"I know, but I want to be able to use it a little bit when we travel to Konohagakure. I won't work too hard, but I need chakra to work on some seals."

She looked pensive for a few seconds and then agreed. "Fine, but we need to do it quickly. Ashita won't like me doing this."

I started running home as soon as she said fine.

A/N:

What kind of compact style should Kane focus on in the future? Jutsu, Close Combat, Genjutsu, Weapons?

Thanks for reading, guys!

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