Chapter 10: Family:

Your POV:

I was hiding in the room next to the one my mother and siblings are in. I know it may be a bit cowardly, but it's been so long and I'm kind of scared to see my mother. I don't know how quickly her condition is deteriorating and I'm afraid to know.

Should I really be here? What if my mother's husband, David Sanderson, finds out? Will he tell Laurie? Oh course he would, the man despises me. I know my siblings wouldn't tell him, but I don't know about my mother. Cognitively, she isn't where she used to be, at least the last time I saw her, so I'm guessing she is probably worse now. So what if she says something about me by accident to David, not knowing it's something she should not say?

But I have to see her, her illness is progressing and I need to put the past aside and see her. Should I just walk in? I don't want to startle her...

Too late, I hear the door open and I turned to see two people standing in the threshold. "(Y/n)!" I hear two familiar voices scream as they both came running into the room.

I squeak as my brother gets to me first and scoops me up into a rib crunching hug. "Ben! You're going to kill her!" I hear Beth cry as she tries to unwrap Ben's arms from around me. I really wish seeing my brother and sister wasn't such a painful experience, they can be a little overzealous when they haven't seen me for a while, but oh was it good to see them.

Ben finally sets me down and Beth swoops in and gives me a much gentler hug. Her head rests on top of my head, and I can feel a few tears drip onto my head. "Awe! Have you gotten taller?!" She jokes as she releases me from the hug to get a better look at me. "Shut up," I say as she kisses my cheek.

"Where the hell have you been, (y/n)?" Ben asked as I wipe tears off of Beth's face. "I've been with Peter." I say simply, "Whoa whoa whoa!" I yell as I see Ben bunch his hands up into fists and head for the door, "It wasn't like that! We were pretending to be in a relationship so I could gain citizenship above ground." Ben relaxes and takes one of the seats in the room.

"I was working here and at a bar closer to Peter's house since I have to be working too in order to get my citizenship. But almost 2 months ago I decided to join the scouts." Ben looked at me in shock, and this time it was Beth who made her way to the door.

"Stop!" I yell at Beth as I grab her hand, "Peter tried to stop me! Don't blame him!" Beth gave me a frustrated sigh and decided to take a seat next to Ben. They both cross their arms and wait for me to explain. Their features resemble their father so much that sometimes it made me a bit uncomfortable.

"I don't know if you have heard, but we have a titan shifter to help us in our fight against the titans." I explained excitedly, "I just had to join when I heard that."

"(Y/n), Mac died fighting those things, there is no winning against them," Ben argues, "Is this a symptom? You've never talked about joining the scouts before."

"No, it's not a symptom. I can't explain it, I just know I have to be there." I argue back. "(Y/n), mom was around your age when she started to become more and more impulsive, that was one of her early symptoms," Beth said quietly.

I paused for a minute. No, that can't be it... Is that why she chose to run away with a man from the underground? Leaving her husband and 3 kids and a life of luxury, to a new life underground... Either way, I'm sure my motivation is more clear in the memories I lost just before I left Laurie's.

"Look, I know you've been around mom a lot more than I have, but if I were experiencing her early symptoms, I would know," I say defiantly. Ben and Beth give each other a worried look but decide to let it go, knowing they are not going to change my mind.

"Anyway, I'm glad you decided to come," Beth said, giving me a small smile, "Mom has been so worried about you, we all have been." I felt guilty, I knew they were worried about me, but I couldn't risk their father finding out where I was and telling Laurie.

I walk towards the window in the room, to sit on the window sill. "I know, but I'm here now." My focus is suddenly pulled outside the window.

I notice a figure up on a roof not far from Peter's office. My paranoid side started coming out, I frown and backed away from the window. What is going on?

"What's wrong?" Ben asked me, concern written all over his face when he sees how frightened I looked. "I don't know," I answered, "Wait here."

I rush out of the room and make my way up to the roof. Are they some of Laurie's people? How did they know I'm here? I realize I don't have a weapon on me and groan in frustration. Usually, I have my throwing knife on me just in case, but of course, I didn't bring it today.

I reach the door to the roof and stand behind it silently, waiting to hear any voices outside. I start to open the door very slowly and take a peek around to see if there is anyone there. When I don't see anyone immediately, I opened the door a little wider and make my way silently onto the roof.

Then I see a familiar brown-haired green-eyed titan boy, a short angry captain, a tall blonde commander, and an even taller and nosier man. My fear instantly turned from fear to frustration, "What the hell?" I yell, taking them all by surprise.

"Are you alright, (y/n)?" I hear Ben ask as he and Beth make their way onto the roof. They look up suspiciously at the 4 men standing in front of me. "Who are they?" Beth questioned, not taking her stormy gray eyes off them.

"Dead men," I answer as I ball my hands into fists and make my way closer to the group. "Are you spying on me now?" I glare and direct my question at Levi since he was the only one I told where I was going.

Levi looks back at me cooly, "You're the one who was always so concerned about people finding you. I thought we would come and look out for you. You're welcome by the way, brat."

I was about to punch him when Ben stepped in and pulled me back towards him, "Oh! You guys are in the scouts too! Excellent! My sister and I need a distraction while (y/n) goes to see our mother."

I glare at Ben as he freed me from his grip, "No, you two are coming with me." Beth places her hand on my shoulder and walks me to the door of the roof, "Don't worry, we won't say anything embarrassing or unnecessary, trust us."

"I don't know what to say to her, Beth," I admit to her quietly.

She smiles at me sadly, "You'll figure it out when you see her. She's having a good day today, but try not to confuse her too much; let her steer the conversation."

I sigh heavily and walk down the stairs to where Peter and my mother are. My hand pauses as I raise it to knock on the door. After giving myself a little pep talk, I knock quietly on the door and Peter's voice invited me in.

I open the door slowly to see my mother sitting on a chair across from Peter. My mother turns to look at me, and her gaunt, tired features brightened immediately, "(y/n)!" She tries to stand, but I rush over and hug her so she doesn't have to get up.

"Mom," I say quietly into her gray-streaked dark brown hair, "I missed you." She hugs me as tightly as she can. I can feel her hands shaking, the tremors must be getting worse.

I pull back and she raises her cold hands to my face, caressing it gently. "Oh, my beautiful girl! I've missed you so much! I understand you and Malcolm are busy newlyweds, but you can't answer a letter once in a while?" My smile drops, she doesn't remember the last 5 years?

Should I play along with what she says? Should I correct her? I look over to Peter, trying to see any sort of assurance from him. He smiles sadly at me and looks down at his hands.

I turn back to my mother and try to smile as genuinely as I can, "I'm sorry mom, we'll do better." She smiles and takes one of my hands with both of hers, "Any grandchildren yet? You and your siblings are driving me insane! Katrina is married but no kids, and neither Benjamin nor Elizabeth are married yet!"

I frowned, Katrina didn't marry her husband until after Malcolm died. Her memories really are off.

"No, not yet, but we're thinking about it," I answer her quietly, trying to keep a smile on my face. "Don't wait too long." She answered sternly.

"How is she?" I finally ask Peter, still holding onto my mother's cold hands.

"As you probably noticed her tremors have gotten worse, and as expected her mood swings and dementia are also getting worse. It is also getting more difficult for her to focus and carry on normal conversations. Unfortunately, the only thing I can do for her is prescribe her medication to help with her depression." Peter answers matter-of-factly.

"How bad are the mood swings?" I don't recall ever seeing my mother angry for no reason. "Well, last time she was here, she had just enough strength to throw the chair she is sitting on at me. This was after I asked her if her new medication was working... That was her way of saying 'no'."

"I would never do such a thing!" I jump at my mother's raised voice, "You're lying!" Her gray eyes narrowed as she glared at Peter.

"Mom," I say, trying to calm her down. I put my hands on her face to force her to focus on me, "(y/n)," she sighed sadly, looking into my (e/c) eyes, "You don't look well. You look sad and tired, my pet. Is Malcolm not treating you right? You were so happy when you two married, and that man is so in love with you, tell me what's wrong."

I missed her soothing voice, I felt my eyes begin to fill with tears and I pull myself away from her. I missed the days in the underground, where if something were wrong I would cry to my mother. I would put my head in her lap and she would run her fingers through my hair soothingly until I stopped. But she wasn't that person anymore, and it hurts to know I can never go back.

I was different now too. I've been trained in brutal ways to avoid showing any kind of undesirable emotions. I had my back turned to my mother and Peter, and I didn't hear my mother stand up from her chair. She pulled hard on my shirt when she lost her balance a bit, trying to get my attention.

My shirt was pulled down enough for my mother to gasp when she saw some of my scars peeking out from under the fabric. I turn around nervously to face my mother again.

Her face was scrunched up as if she were contemplating something. Like she was trying her hardest to focus and remember something. "Lawrence." She said quietly. I was surprised, of course, she knew I worked for Laurie, but I never told her about any abuse, and I asked my siblings to not tell her either. I didn't know what to do. I give Peter a frightened look, hoping he would help me out.

"Laney," Peter smiles gently at my mother, snapping her back from her daze and back into reality, "I still have more questions for you." My mother smiles back at him and grabs my hand, motioning for me to sit back down next to her.

"How many times a day do you get your tremors?" Peter asked as he lifted his pen to write some notes. He's done this before, he will usually ask one of my siblings questions about my mother, and then ask my mother the same questions later. He's trying to test her memory and cognition.

I listen quietly to their conversation, trying to commit her answers to memory... Just in case.

Eren's POV:

"I heard you call her '(y/n)', is that her real name?" I ask the dark-haired man.

"Yes." I hear Levi answer, "She told us when we took her to Commander Erwin's office." He explained when he saw the confused look on my face. So I guess Levi, Mike, Hange, horse face and Erwin knew her real name.

I was kind of jealous, I didn't really know anything about her now that I think about it. After the scuffle between her and Jean was broken up, and they were taken to Commander Erwin's office, I guessed she would have to confess some things to them.

"Yes," the man said, "She's our half-sister, we have the same mother. I'm Benjamin Sanderson and this is my sister Elizabeth Sanderson." He gestured to the woman with short dark brown hair next to him, who smiled politely at us.

"So (y/n)'s last name is Sanderson?" I asked Benjamin, "No, we have the same mother, but different fathers. So she has the same last name as her father, which is (l/n)." He explained.

"Has she been well? We have been trying to find out what has happened to her for the past 3 years." Elizabeth asked, stepping closer to me.

"Um I assume so," I commented, "she's very private so it's difficult to say. But overall I believe she is fine."

Elizabeth bites her lower lip nervously and looks at her brother, who also looks worried. "Is there a problem?" Captain Levi challenged, annoyed by their nervous reactions.

"There is an illness that runs on our mother's side of the family," Benjamin started to explain, "Our mother started showing symptoms around (y/n)'s age. My sisters and I have been fine so far, but we don't know much about (y/n)'s health."

"Someone is approaching the building," Mike says before anyone else could ask any more questions. We all rush to the edge of the building to take a look. It was a woman. She appeared to also have dark brown hair that was pulled up in a tight bun on top of her head. She was also wearing a long pale yellow dress and thick glasses.

"Katrina! What are you doing here?" Elizabeth calls to the woman, startling the woman a little bit.

She looks up at the roof, "Beth?! Ben?! What the hell are you doing on the roof? And why is the door locked?" The woman, 'Katrina', shouted sternly while pulling on the door.

"Never mind that, what are you doing here?" Benjamin challenged, narrowing his eyes at her. "I don't need your permission to go with our mother to her appointment." She rebutted, glaring up at Benjamin, "No one told me she even had one today!"

"You guys should get (y/n) out of here," Benjamin whispered, "Katrina is our oldest sister, and if (y/n) sees Kat, I don't know if you'll be able to hold her back. We'll go deal with Kat."

"It was nice meeting you all! I'm sure we'll see you again soon!" Elizabeth waves at us and her and her brother make their way toward the door leading off the roof.

"Eren, go get Petra, Oluo, Eld and Gunter, and make your way to the carriage and horses. Mike, guard the front door to make sure no one else gets in. Levi and I will get (y/n)." Commander Erwin ordered us.

I wanted to stay and help with (y/n), but of course, there is no arguing with the Commander. So I nodded and put on my ODM gear, and make my way over to where Petra and Oluo were first.

When I get there, I see Petra yelling at a smirking Oluo. "Hey, we have to get going!" I shout over Petra, "We have to get the carriage and horses, get ready to leave."

"Aye aye, brat! Be right there!" Oluo laughs, slurring his words slightly. I raise my eyebrows at Petra. Her face is red with anger and she slaps Oluo hard, "Get it together! If the captain finds out you left your post to go get drunk, he'll kill both of us!"

Oluo's drunk? That doesn't sound like him. Regardless, I start to make my way over to Eld and Gunter's position to update them.

Your POV:

Judging by Peter's expressions, I could tell my mother was getting a lot of his questions wrong. She had a hard time concentrating too, her mind whipped from one topic to another without warning.

There is a knock at the door, which makes me jump. "(Y/n)! Why are you so jumpy? Get the door, it may be your father." My mother giggles at me. Great, now she thinks it's 12 years ago.

I stand up to answer the door, expecting it to be Ben or Beth on the other side. But I'm met with the stern expressions of Captain Levi and Commander Erwin. I step out of the room and into the hallway but leave the door open. "What are you doing here?" I hiss at them, not caring that they are my superiors and speaking to them this way could get me into trouble.

"Sorry to disturb you," Erwin says, raising his eyebrows at my defensive tone, "But your brother and sister informed us that there is a person out front to see your mother, who you would prefer to avoid."

I freeze for a minute, trying to think of who he may be talking about. Who else knows that my mother is here? Someone I'd like to avoid? That could be a lot of people.... Maybe David? Though I've never known him to be the type to go to an appointment with my mother. Any appointment I have gone to be with her, he has never come. Oh, wait.... Maybe Katrina.

My eyes darken when I think of my oldest sister, I didn't realize that I had muttered her name out loud until Levi says, "That's the name we heard, so let's go before you run into each other."

"Katrina? Oh good! She'll be so happy to see you, (y/n)!" I hear my mother gush as I turn around to kiss her goodbye.

"Thank you," I say to Peter as I give my mother a tight hug, "I'll see you again soon, mom. I promise." After she releases me from the hug, she gets a better look at Levi and Erwin standing at the door, "Oh! What handsome men! (Y/n), introduce them to Elizabeth! Her father and I have been trying to set her up."

"Sure mom, I love you," I respond as I rush out the door, Levi and Erwin following closely behind me.

We made our way to the front door, and I opened it a little just to make sure there was no one there. Mike was standing just outside the door, and he motioned for me to step out.

There was a carriage right out front and I could hear voices coming from around the side of the building. It is probably Ben and Beth distracting Katrina. We rushed into the carriage and took off down the road.

I finally breathe a sigh of relief and relax a little into the comfy seat. "So, are you going to explain what that was all about?" Erwin asked me, breaking the tranquil silence of the carriage.

"Nope," I answered him as I stared out the window. No one asked me anything else after that, and I was grateful for that. I was still frustrated that they followed me, but I have to admit their intentions were good.

"Thank you," I say shyly to the men as the soft rocking of the carriage lulls me to sleep.

Levi's POV:

Did she actually say thank you? I definitely wasn't expecting that. I was expecting her to yell at us for the duration of our trip back to HQ. I watch her as her eyes close and she drifts off to sleep. What a strange girl.

We rode in silence for the rest of the trip, and (y/n) slept the whole way. When the carriage stops I can hear Mike whisper, "So, who's going to wake her up?" Erwin and I give each other a look, we've both heard rumors that she is especially unpleasant if you try to wake her up.

Before any of us made a move, Petra opens the door to the carriage, Oluo staggering around next to her. "Sir," Petra greeted me, "I need to talk to you."

"Don't bother Petra deer," Oluo slurred his words as he pushed Petra out of the way and leaned into the threshold of the carriage. "Captain Levi sir, I got drunk while we were sitting around doing nothing, and I'm not sorry about it." He smiles crookedly at me.

I curl my hands into fists, ready to drag him off to the stable, where he can clean every single cobblestone until it shines; I'll lecture him when he's sober.

Before I get up to push Oluo out, he notices (y/n) still fast asleep, leaning against the window of the carriage. "Hey! Wakey wakey you miserable little bitch!" Oluo laughs as he nudges her hard, rousing her from her sleep.

I have never seen such a cute face make that menacing a look before. Without warning, (y/n) kicks Oluo hard right in the face with such force it knocked him out of the carriage, sending him sprawling to the ground.

(Y/n) yawns and stretches her limbs out, "See you later, sirs." She saluted us and let herself out of the carriage, being mindful to step on Oluo's stomach as she left.

Petra was on her knees laughing at the situation. I step out of the carriage next and stared down at a groaning Oluo, "Go sober up and then come see me in my office."