Fainting of rage (connoisseurs will know)

"Ah, Sasuke-san, I didn't know we were brothers with similar goals." I started my act. "Who would say you are a man of culture like me? I'm sorry I laughed at you all these years..."

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke asked with a frown, while Sakura looked like she wanted to kill me. I was hoping she would try. I had been wishing I had reasons to break some of her bones for some time now, and being attacked was one of the best reasons there was, unfortunately, she hesitated, no doubt remembering my threat.

"Of course I'm talking about your ambition to restore your clan. I mean, how are you going to do that if you're not taking dozens of strong wives to have Uchiha babies here and there?" I asked innocently and I finally made the emo boy blush for the first time in his life. "I imagine I can give you some useful tips to increase the chance of you repopulate your…future children…I imagine you want to have strong children, so having an affair with the Kurama clan heiress might be viable. Imagine, an Uchiha with the kekkei genkai of the Kurama clan and the most feared doujutsu in the shinobi world? Man, even I was a little scared. There are other options too. if I'm not wrong, there are still a few Uzumaki women scattered across the Elemental Nations, hidden after Uzushio was destroyed. It's quite doable for you to have babies with an Uzumaki woman since the Yang affinity of the Uzumaki would be perfect complements to the Yin Uchiha affinity..."

"You…you…" he said as he pointed at me with his purple face almost leaking blood from the facial holes.

Naruto frowned upon hearing my ramblings on Uzumaki women, but like the dense good protagonist that he was, he ignored that and went on to watch the emo suffer from my verbal attacks.

"Ah, there are many good techniques for pleasing women that I can teach you, too. I suggest you start slowly and use your tongue to soften the girls' tender flesh first. Do this until you feel plenty of fluid coming out of them. It's better if they're properly lubricated after all. In any case, by now most women would be almost lost in sexual pleasure and would not think much about entering them. But make sure you go in only after they're soft and drunk with pleasure and only then can you stick your baby liquid straw in them..."

"Shut up!!!!!"

"What's the problem? Don't you want to repopulate your clan?" I asked shamelessly.

"It's not about this?" He said in a loud voice. I made him speak loudly, hehehe, the Uchiha who only used to say "hm" was forced to scream for me.

"Oh, do you like butts? You can have anal sex too, but be clear that this type of intercourse is not going to give you a child, so you need to set your priorities more critically. Anal sex is fine and all, but I personally prefer conventional sex. But sometimes an ass can be good to enhance the experience, you know? The anus is particularly tight so it will feel totally different compared to a woman's vaginal wall…" I started talking randomly now. I could feel Sasuke losing his mind now, it wasn't long before he blacked out in anger.

I couldn't help but laugh and laugh at him while the teachers were silent, looking at me and the little emo passed out.

"Let's go, guys. Yamato-san when are we meeting tomorrow?"

"3rd training camp." He said and I said goodbye, getting ready to use body flicker and head out towards my complex. "Arrive at 5 am."

"Of course, of course." I spoke with a smile.

"Don't eat anything or you'll vomit!" he yelled just before I disappeared into a swirl of blue leaves.