Spectating the Chazz - 16

*** 

A/N: This is more of a filler.

After two nights.

All the keys have vanished. 💀

'Oh wow, who would have thought?' I couldn't help but shake my head as a flood of messages poured in through the Duel Disk and my phone.

I decided to check what all the fuss was about, even though I knew it probably wasn't anything serious. I did create a group chat for emergency purposes, but those useless bastards got mah numbers now and has been spamming me. As I checked what it was, I was getting DMs from Alexis.... 100 missed messages, all from Alexis.

Yeah.

~

Text message: To Alexis

What is with you messaging me so much? I'm not reading all that. You could have just given me a TLDR: The spirit keys are stolen! I already knew this was gonna happen. Oh, by the way, I took Zane's key and put it in Jaden's drawer for easy stealing.

😀

~

And sent. 

***

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

'Ah, the messages are still pouring in.' I silently thought as I got into a lotus position with Dark Magician Girl for easier breathing.

The shadow riders have to win against you spirit key holders in a duel. Did you useless forget? The magic contract was done when you put the key around the neck. Useless as always.

[Husband, just go meet them,] Dark Magician Girl urged, biting my shoulder, her breath heavy, and still moving her hips in a circular motion as she lay on top of me. We were both naked, with her curled up on top of me.

[Maybe if you stop grinding me with my dick inside you half-asleep I might.] I replied, to which she struggled and reluctantly stopped after a while.

As I slowly pulled out, she immediately— transformed into light and then merged with me.

[Whew, I almost lost some of it,] She said in relief, sounding tired.

[You know that makes me feel hella uncomfortable hearing that, right? It sounds like stuff's just going back inside me 💀], I groaned, feeling a bit dizzy, as I struggled to get up.

[I don't want to kill my little Gojo juniors.] Dark Magician Girl playfully said.

[How do you even fit all of that inside you? It's almost a whole bottle's worth.] I wondered. (We're talking about Gojo's milk btw.)

[A magic girl has her secrets.] She replied mysteriously.

Not questioning that, I got up slowly and put on my blindfold.

~

Whenever we do this, I have to take off my blindfold because she wants to see my eyes too when we do it. But the mental burden when I open my eyes... All the information floods in, and I can see everything, even the tiniest speck of dust in the room, even though I'd rather not know. I can see every detail in nearly 360 degrees around me, crystal clear and vivid.

So, for at least four hours every day, my blindfolds are off, and sometimes it extends to even longer. The strange burning sensation, the pressure of processing tedious and unwanted information, and the rapidly accumulating mental fatigue make it almost unbearable. The reverse curse technique wouldn't be of any help here, as it does not recover any drop in mental strength or the strange sensations I'm feeling.

Even Gojo Satoru was not exempt from this, easily drained of mental strength for having his eyes out for over a long-extended period of time. Mental strength rapidly gets depleted the longer the eyes are exposed, usually after an hour or two, and adjusting to that was difficult.

And of course, Dark Magician Girl knows about this, so whenever she is upset with me 💀—it's an all-nighter. And mind you, she uses her magic to keep my eyes wide open. Does that sound strange? To have sex all night with my eyes open as a form of punishment? Of course, I could say no to this sort of arrangement or even saying no to the sex.

But… Here is the thing. This is a kind of ultimatum for me, stemming from her peculiar sense of unorthodox justice and her inability to forgive me for that one time I attempted to summon evil gods. Remember, her binding vow 💀? So, according to her, if we don't have sex every day, she will die. I don't know if that's true or just some bullshit she came up with.

But I know I'll never need to fact-check that. Because I love her and doing this thing makes us both happy. However, right after we're finished, there's no time for sleep because it's always that time to head out. That's why I'm especially grumpy in the morning or when I have to interact with people. It feels like shit when I don't have any rest.

Fortunately, there are drugs in my Gate of Infinity, (thanks Gilgamesh!) But Dark Magician Girl is against me using any of those strange substances. She would have much preferred to use her magic to 'help' me.

"It's fine if I take my time, right? I'm going for a shower," I casually said, whistling as I made my way to the shower room in my private room.

[I guess? Ah, wait! I'm joining~ Let me wash your body!] Dark Magician Girl materialized, also wondering if it was an emergency to go to them right away.

[Aren't you tired?] I asked, trying to understand how Dark Magician Girl is always active.

That was a rhetorical question. Of course, she's not tired. I've found out she can keep going for days if she ever wanted to. Duel spirits are just built differently.

***

I teleported as soon as I got ready.

The duel just started as I got to the Red Dorm. Honestly, I was tempted to say something, but I decided against it and stayed invisible.

I had already missed the dumbasses getting caught lacking.

I settled by sitting on the railing with Dark Magician Girl in my lap, both of us fully invisible to everyone.

"Duel!" Both Chazz and Zaloog announced.

[Fucking called it. That guy is a shadow rider.] I telepathically said nonchalantly.

4000 LP x2. Zaloog vs. Chazz.

"I'll win this, as easy as I stole your keys! First, I summon Golem Sentry in defense mode," Zaloog began his turn.

He placed a face up monster with 1800 Defense in defense position.

"Next, I play a card face down and end my turn."

[Babe, no matter what, don't play like them. Seriously, you'll lose to me every single time in a duel.] I warned.

[Like how you always want to tap out on me after the first hour?] Dark Magician Girl shot back playfully.

I started tickling her in revenge as she burst into laughter.

~

"My turn, I play the spell card beam sanctuary with this card I can summon a metal fiend token to the field and now I'll sacrifice my beam token to bring out armed dragon level 5!" Chazz confidently began his turn.

He played that monster with 2400 Attack in attack position.

"Go on, dragons, use those arms to destroy that golem!"

The dragon seriously started performing a windmill punch on both of its arms. Giving it goofy ass attack animation.

"And for the next moves, I'm gonna place two facedown. Then I will use my dragon's special ability. It's a big boy. LEVEL 7-ARMED DRAGON!" Chazz said with excitement.

A monster with 2800 Attack in attack position.

"Level up all you want, it won't matter and you're about to see why!" Zaloog drew his card and played it immediately after glancing at it for a fraction of a second.

"I will play Pot of Greed," Zaloog declared.

[He is using it first turn. Isn't that bad?] I muttered as I started caressing Dark Magician Girl. She was doing her best to stifle any moans.

"It lets me draw two more cards from my deck." He smiled as he drew two new cards.

"Just what I wanted! The one and only Don Zaloog. And when I say one and only, I really mean it." Zaloog started walking to the field monster zone.

Zaloog is a monster with 1400 attack points.

[Hmm. What? He was a monster card?] I was surprised. I could also barely remember what this monster card is too.

'But a monster coming to life? Is it that knockoff Millennium item again? Shadow charm, was it? This thing has a lot of strange abilities.' I nodded in understanding.

[Hmm? Oh, that, yeah. They can come to life, most likely temporarily. Probably have a condition. They'll turn back into a monster card if they can't fulfill it,] Dark Magician Girl explained, all the while making herself even more comfortable on my lap. Her body leaned against my solid, well-built frame, enjoying the feeling of my physique.

~

"Because children, I am him." Zaloog said.

"Wait so." Syrus asked in confusion.

"He's a card?" Chumley continued for Syrus.

"Wow." Jaden said in shock.

Alexis reached for her phone with a frown after remembering she had received a notification. It was from Gojo, and it seemed like he replied after ignoring her spamming messages about the keys being stolen. Then again, after a while, it started to make sense. He did mention something about needing to be beaten in a duel if the keys were ever stolen since they wouldn't work.

She had realized she had forgotten about that condition. Still, it frustrated her how nonchalant Gojo seemed about the situation.

As Alexis read the message, she couldn't help frowning a lot. 'Zane's key is also gone, but it was Gojo who took it and let it get stolen by these guys.' She couldn't help but look around, wondering if Gojo was here, watching this duel too.

"Not just me, Because with this spell card. Mustering of the dark scorpions. I can summon all of them. That's right, all of the dark scorpions in my hand. Come join me on the field!" Zaloog played all four monsters on his Duel Disk after inserting the spell card into his graveyard.

[Did he fucking top deck?] I was looking at this in confusion, ain't no way he just pulled a combo. But... now he has no cards left in his hand after that move.

There are 4 new monsters in the Attack position with 1800 Attack points, 1000 attack points, 1200 attack points, and 1000 attack points.

[That lineup sure reminds me of that goofy ass Ginyu Force from Dragon Ball 💀] I chuckled, recalling some things.

[Mmmhmm, husband shut up.] Dark Magician Girl telepathically voiced her complaint.

[Yes, dear.] 

'Losers,' Chazz internally expressed his disgust.

"Now I'll play a trap, you see on the first turn that all the dark scorpions are out this turn. This trap allows each of us to attack you directly and for every one of those attacks you lose 400 life points. Not let him have it!" Zaloog and his team seriously jumped him. Chazz was inflicted with attacks of physical weapons and lost 400 life points from each attack.

Chazz's life points dropped to 2000.

[Sheesh. It would have been over if it was based on their attack points instead of the effect of 400 points of damage.] Dark Magician Girl stretched out comfortably.

"This isn't how you want to start a duel!" Jaden said.

"Shut up Jaden!" Chazz growled.

"Ahaha, and there's more too. For you see Chazz now our special abilities go into effect against you." Zaloog continued.

"Say what!?" Chazz groaned in surprise.

[Oh?] I was surprised. They have more to show.

"First, a monster on your field must return to the top of your deck," One giant clown said.

Chazz's dragon disappeared from the field, returning to top of his deck.

"And then next, a card on your field returns to your hand," The second clown said.

One of Chazz's facedown cards on the field magically reappeared in his hand.

"There's more to it. The top two cards on your deck go to the grave," A third clown continued.

Chazz drew the two cards and looked at them before discarding them into the graveyard.

"And then one card in your hand is destroyed," Zaloog happily declared.

Chazz picked a card he wanted to discard to the graveyard.

"Finally, a card that mentions Dark Scorpion in its name can be added to our hand from the graveyard," The female clown added.

"And I'll pick this Dark Scorpion Combination, the card that started it all!" He revealed the trap card he had just used.

[That's a cool combo.] I nodded in understanding of this monster's deck now.

[It's stupid.] Dark Magician Girl sharply said with a cold tone.

[The condition for that trap card to work most likely relies on all 5 specific monsters on the field or else it won't work.] She added and explained her own thoughts.

'Ah, did she already know? Then there must be more conditions for it too. Most likely the monsters must be the one direct attack for those effects to trigger, huh. So, it's ass.' I sighed after seeing 5 effects being played.

"Chazz, stick with us! You can win against these guys!" Jaden encouraged him.

"No shit sherlock! Now shut up!" Chazz retorted with a tick mark on his forehead.

"And let the Chazz. Do his thing." Chazz declared.

Dark Magician Girl couldn't help but giggle as she noticed some similarities between Chazz and her husband from the way they talk.

"I play my Trap Card, Level Modulation. Now you get to draw two cards, and I get to summon a high-level monster from the graveyard without paying anything, and I choose Armed Dragon Level 7!" Chazz confidently declared.

The 2800 Attack Points monster returned.

"Hmm? Him again?" Zaloog drew two cards and glanced at them.

"You give me no choice but to set two face-down cards and end my turn," Zaloog distastefully replied.

"It's my turn, and first, Armed Dragon Level 7's effect activates. By sending one monster card in my hand to the graveyard, monsters with Attack Points equal to or fewer than my discarded one are destroyed, and the card I'm discarding is Despair from the Dark! A 2800 Attack Points monster!" Chazz said as he revealed his monster card.

"Hold it! I play a Trap Card, Retreat of the Dark Scorpions! Now all Dark Scorpions on the field retreat to my hand!" Zaloog countered.

No, they seriously ran away from the actual field, surprising all of us.

"W—what!? Whatever. Attack him directly, Armed Dragon! Go get him!" Chazz declared.

"Sonic Spear!" He added for effects.

The hologram menace dragon obeyed and launched a lightning spear at Zaloog directly.

Dropping Zaloog life points to 1200.

"I'll place one card face down and end my turn," Chazz said, unfazed.

"It was just one lucky move. But it won't matter. 'Cause it's gonna end here.'' Zaloog snarled as he drew his card.

"I summon myself, again." Zaloog said.

'Wish I could do that. 💀' I chuckled at the thought.

"Then I play Mustering of the Dark Scorpions again!" Zaloog played his Spell Card into his Duel Disk.

"Welcome back, team," Zaloog and his gang cheered as they returned to the monster field.

"Sorry!" Chazz revealed his face-down card.

[[He's not.]] Both Dark Magician Girl and I synchronously said.

"They are not back yet. I play my trap card Ojama Trio." Chazz declared.

A replica of the three ugly ass Ojama spirits started coming out of the hologram cards and flew towards the opponent's field.

I choked when I saw them. 'It's them again.'

[Mhmm?] The Dark Magician Girl tilted her head in confusion.

"Pause, why are they on our field?" One of Zaloog's clown asked.

"So, you guys can't come out," Chazz explained with his signature confidence.

"See, Ojama Trio creates O-Jama tokens, and they take up three of your monster slots. Plus, when destroyed, you lose 300 life points."

"So, we can't come out? That's not fair," another of Zaloog's clowns asked, a mix of confusion and frustration in their tone.

The three tokens were doing some goofy aahh shit.

"Go on boss, do what you have to." One of Zaloog's female clowns volunteered herself as tribute.

"Meanae, I will never forget you for this." Zaloog closed his eyes as he played the spell card.

'I'm sure as hell will.'

"I play dark scorpion tragedy of love, when Don Zaloog and Meanae the thorn, are on the field I can send her to the graveyard to destroy all of your monsters on your side of the field." Zaloog regrettably said as he watched his henchman destroy Chazz's strongest monster and followed by her being…incapacitated?

Now the most interesting part.

"I will attack you directly!" As Zaloog started firing his pistols at Chazz.

I laughed when I heard that💀. Zaloog started firing his pistol to dab on Chazz's life point.

Chazz's life points to 600.

"Since I've attacked you directly, my effects come into play! You have to discard a random card from your hand. But you only have one card!" Zaloog said with fervor.

"Well, actually, thanks, man. I needed you to do just that," Chazz said with a smirk.

"What!?" Zaloog exclaimed in surprise.

"The only card in my hand is Ojama's magic and when this card is sent to the graveyard, well then, Ojama yellow, green and black all come into my hand.

"Bring them all out, they don't scare me or do anything!" Zaloog started laughing.

Well, I know damn well Zaloog is fucked for sure now. It's his duel spirits that are coming out.

"Yeah, well we'll see what I can do to change that. My turn, go Pot of Greed! And next I play polymerization! Scared yet?" Chazz snared.

"Ah, fuck." Zaloog muttered in surprise.

"Well, you should be. Go do your things Ojamas!" Chazz declared.

As three miniature ugly ass hologram monsters came out.

"You got it boss!" Ojama Yellow jumping towards into the air

"Time to show these numbskulls!" Ojama Black hurling towards where Ojama yellow is.

"It certainly is!" Ojama Green jumped and headbutted both Ojama's heads.

Obviously, everyone was kind of, well, staring at this scene. Confusion could be seen on everyone's face regarding why Chazz would play such a deck. Only those who are in the know are aware of what these cards can do.

"Ojama King!" A new monster emerged and introduced itself.

"What the hell is that?" Zaloog stared at the giant monster, which had 0 Attack Points.

"Now I play my Spell Card," Chazz said with a sly grin.

"Ojama Muscle."

The hologram displaying the fat and unfit Ojama King suddenly transformed into a muscular, fit version. Then, it absorbed the three Ojama tokens on the opponent's field using its tongue.

[It's game over now.] I telepathically said.

[Yeah, I know Honey. Let's go back now, I don't feel like watching this anymore.] Dark Magician Girl said tiredly as she turned her body and hugged me. No, she started dry humping me, this nympho.

"Ohjama muscles destroys all of the Ojama monsters out and for everyone destroyed, the King gains 1000 attack points." Chazz explains the spell cards effect as the hologram begins to play.

Ojama King has 3000 attack points now. 

"Oh, and you also take 900 life points since those Ojama tokens are gone now. Now."

Zaloog's life point drops to 300.

"Now go, Ojama King, attack Don with the Flying Belly Flop Drop!" Chazz pointed at Zaloog.

[What a weird attack name.] I watched the giant piece of white shit jumping high, all while trying to resist my horny magician in front of me.

The Ojama king flew into the air and dropped on Don.

Dropping Don Zaloog's life point to 0 and ending the game.

That was when the crew cheered at Chazz's victory.

"Man, wish Gojo was here to see this. It would have been awesome! Chazz just beated a shadow rider." Jaden roared in excitement.

"Uhm, right." Alexis was still looking around if Gojo was here. Just as I was about to leave, in those few moments, the fake Millennium Eye started acting up, glowing brightly.

'No fucking way!' I shared my thoughts and Dark Magician Girl noticed an unusual amount of magic emanating from the knock off Millenium eye.

Immediately, Dark Magician Girl and I shot up and quickly got into position to counter any potential threats aimed at Chazz, Jaden, and the others.

But no, it just merely transformed Don Zaloog and his entire circus clown back into cards.

After realizing it wasn't anything special, I sighed and teleported myself and Dark Magician Girl back home, calling it a day. Not before sending a congratulatory message to Chazz for his easy victory through text.

Chazz looked irritated as he collected his winnings from the defeated Don Zaloog and realized he had picked up another Duel Spirit. While the rest of the group was celebrating Chazz's victory and worried about Don Zaloog's sudden disappearance and confusion, his annoyance grew when he read my text message.

***