Chapter 18: Shib pal ♡

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

He hoped he would never have to see that face again. As absurd as it sounded, Seoul was big enough for him to get lost in it but faith was not on his side so he froze, feeling his blood being slowly replaced with ice. Daeshim was not someone he would like to have small-talk with so he turned around, everything still hazy, when he heard a imposing "hey".

It was like a bigger power was forcing him to remain in place and that's when he felt the man approaching him. He couldn't make a scene because that would have potentially cause for the library to never let him read there but he jumped startled when he felt a hand resting on his shoulder.

"I've heard you found yourself another Dom and it's no one else than Jeon Jungkook." The words were thrown at him quizzically and he felt a shiver down his spine. His Daddy had nothing to do with their past so he didn't want to involve him, not even by saying his name. "I never expected that. He's rather famous so I can only wonder why he does want you from all the capable subs he could have."

"That's none of your business." His voice was barely audible but he was proud that it was there at all. He was ready to leave with his small victory when Daeshim grabbed his forearm in order to pull him back.

"Why don't you come back to me, Jiminie? We're such a great team." That was beyond his imagination so the pink haired boy's eyes began to water at the suggestion, memories he has tried to erase flooding his brain without a break. He knew it has been abuse – borderline rape; Jungkook never had the heart to call it that way but he was aware of the truth, he wasn't stupid. "You'll become my good boy again, my fucktoy."

The grasp became painful the more he tried to get away from it but he didn't want to grab anyone's attention because he didn't want people to know about his lifestyle. No one knew he was gay either, they just considered him a peculiar but nice person.

"Leave me alone."

"Do you really think he cares for you?" Daeshim's words were filled with hate. "You're just a broken toy he'll use until he finds something better. We're two fuck-ups, that's why we belong together."

His whole body began trembling and tears were burning his eyeballs but he wasn't going to cry in front of that man because he knew how much satisfaction he would feel if that would happen.

"He loves me." He whispered and finally pulled away, his feet struggling to move his body as further as possible.

"Come on! He could never care for a whore like you." The words were loud enough to be heard by everyone but he couldn't concentrate on that because his body finally gave in and sobs began crushing his figure with each step he took. He ran towards the door that lead to the storage and stumbled, his knees completely giving out. He pushed the door close with one of his feet before pressing his back against the wall and hearing the sound of his phone falling on the ground.

He was having a panic attack – he could tell as much. Normally, he would have tried to calm down, to follow the exact steps that could improve his situation but he was too scared to do so, the only thought on his mind being Daeshim following him there. He knew it was improbable for the elder to risk so much as they were in public but his brain was screaming at him that he will be assaulted. That his body was going to be tormented and that he'd go back to the start, when he was feeling worthless and unlovable. He could hear people talking but the words were too hurried and quiet for him to understand them so he struggled to pick up his phone instead. He wrote the wrong password two times before finally managing to unlock it and calling the only number he had on speed dial.

Three rings felt like forever and Jimin kept gulping in order to mask his agitated sobs.

"Hey, Min! Have you lef –" They were supposed to meet for lunch; in fact, he was supposed to go to Jungkook's apartment after he was done with the kids and he insisted that his boyfriend shouldn't come to pick him up. He muffled a wail with his hand but the man was smart enough to understand he was not alright. "Jimin?"

"Daddy, h-he's here." He was whispering so the tattoo artist had a hard time understanding what he was talking about, still confused about who he was referring to. "Daeshim." He rapidly explained and looked over at the door to make sure it was still closed.

"Where are you? Has he touched you, love?" Jimin shook his head dumbly before closing his eyes, feeling like he could pass out any moment. "Min, talk to me, little one." He was feeling little and scared and he couldn't face anyone else beside Jungkook. Truth to be told, he was afraid he couldn't handle his Daddy either.

"The library." He sniffled and wiped his nose with the back of his hand.

"I just got out of my place, peach. I'm coming there, okay? Talk to me until I arrive." Jungkook was worried beyond measure and he had no idea what to focus on, unsure of what was really going on. He knew his baby was terrified of his ex-dom and he had to choose the right words because Jimin was nothing like his previous subs. He was a lot more fragile and one little mistake could hurt him. "Can you focus on my voice, kitten?"

"I – I think so." Another sniffle.

"There's my sweet boy. Are you somewhere safe?" He could hear the other's breath increasing in pace.

"He can come here, Daddy." Jimin's voice became progressively louder and every syllable was laced with fear. "I don't want him to, I'm scared. I d-don't want to –" Another wave of sobs followed and Jungkook felt his heart breaking at the distressed tone.

"I want you to listen to me."

"He'll –" The panic was doing worse so the brown-haired man decided he should grasp his attention.

"Jimin, I'm trying to talk to you. Daddy's asking you to –"

"No!" It was a surprising reply so Jungkook's eyes widened as he registered what he's been told. It was rare for his little to react so violently, especially while in headspace and that only made the seriousness of the event more worrying. Thankfully, the library was not that far away so he could make it in less than ten minutes. "I'm s-sorry, Daddy." He whispered alarmed. "Please come, I'm sorry."

"I'm on my way, kitten. Can you tell me exactly where you are?"

"In the storage room, the –" Another sniffle. "Black door. I just want to go home." The last sentence made it obvious how drained he was feeling and Jungkook cursed under his breath at the red light that made him stop, his hand nervously gripping on the driving wheel.

It was not exactly easy to find that room but the tattoo artist did his best to hurry, realising he had to get his anxious boyfriend out of there as soon as humanly possible. They talked until he finally reached the location but didn't barge inside the room, knowing that might scare Jimin.

"Can I come in, angel?"

"Yes." The pink haired boy still jumped startled when the door opened and Jungkook's stomach sank at the image his eyes laid on. The student was curled into himself, his right hand closed around the Jupiter necklace he wore around like a charm. His eyes were glassy so the tattoo artist stepped closer and squatted in front of him so their faces would be at the same level.

"Hey." He looked devastated and Jungkook understood he was still panicked because he kept looking at the door. "He's not here." Jimin gulped and his eyes widened; he wasn't sure if he should believe him or not. "Let's go home." It was as if he was talking to a cornered animal and as soon as his hand reached for the boy's knee he regretted his decision, watching as more tears began to gather at the corners of his eyes.

The younger had no idea why it was so difficult to relax – it was like his senses heightened and he was overwhelmed by every little touch and stare. He could feel Jungkook's warmth through the material of his pants but his mind still felt scattered and he couldn't focus on anything. The hand cupped his knee so he pulled back instinctively, irrational terror beginning to bubble inside of him. The tattoo artist realised he was the one who created the additional distress so he raised both his hands to indicate he would not try to touch him anymore.

"Let's get out of here, sweetheart."

Jimin managed to get up within seconds but his legs were still shaking, his right hand still holding tight on his pendant.

"The car is parked right outside, baby. I'll go and grab your things first, okay?" The student nodded absent-mindedly and headed to the exit, too ashamed of the experience to look at any of the people he knew. The cold was biting his skin but he felt it helping him go back to his senses so he relieved into the feeling, right until his own jacket was placed onto his shoulders. "Let's get inside before you freeze."

Jungkook started the car after he made sure their safety belts were in place and was ready to ask where he should head to when he realised Jimin was crying again, his body turned towards the window. It was the silent type of crying and the elder couldn't help but wonder if it wasn't his fault for this reaction; maybe his presence was not what the boy needed. Maybe he needed Taehyung or Hoseok.

"Should we go home so you can stay with Taehyungie, sweet boy?"

Taehyung had no idea about how hurt he has been by the past relationship. Sure, he saw him suffering a lot but that didn't mean he knew the details of the things he's gone through and he didn't feel like reliving them. Truthfully, he had no idea what could make it better, he wanted his Daddy but he didn't want to go to his place because he couldn't stand –

"N-No." Jungkook had no idea how to help so he started the car and headed towards the only place he found fit: Ansan. They haven't been there ever since they first confessed their feelings to each other but it was drawn enough from the city to offer them some privacy. The crying didn't subside and the elder felt his stomach twisting at every sob, feeling helpless until they actually reached the destination. There was no other car there and Jungkook turned to look at the pink-haired boy, his eyes widening at the swollen face and at the tears that were still falling.

"Fuck, Min." He whispered and ran his hands through his hair, agitated. "It's breaking my heart to see you like this. What happened, baby boy?" Jimin rubbed his eyes and hesitantly extended both his arms, suggesting that he wanted to be held. Jungkook moved his chair back and helped his baby on his lap, carefully holding him against his chest. "It's okay, peach. You're here with me now." The pink head was resting on his shoulder so he kept caressing his back gently, unsure of what the limits were. "You're okay."

"'m s-sorry, Daddy."

"Hush, sweets." He could stay like that for hours if that meant Jimin was going to feel better. A few more minutes were needed for the younger's breathing to became regular and for his body to go limp against the stronger one. His hands were tucked in between their bodies, his fingertips searching for a calming heartbeat.

"He told me h-he..." Jungkook didn't force him away so they could look at each other, he knew it was easier for the boy to speak like that and he wanted to focus on the substance of his words. "He wants me back, Daddy." That sentence alone had his blood boiling and normally he would have cursed loudly at that son of a bitch and at his nerve but he knew his baby wasn't able to handle something like that so he tried to calm down and listen until the end. "I d-don't want to, Daddy. Please – I-I'm s-sorry for being so –" He gulped and sobbed loudly. "I'm always being b-bad and I'm a whore –"

"Jimin." Jungkook tried and gently pushed him back so he could search for his eyes.

"I'm gonna be be-better for you, I don't want to go back to him." Hands cupped his face and thumbs began brushing his hot tears away.

"You're not." He promised and pressed their foreheads together. "My baby's not going anywhere." Jimin sobbed and shook his head, incredulous. "I promise you, Minnie." Jungkook felt like beating the shit out of Daeshim for talking like that, for hurting his baby boy with his hateful words. These were the type of things that could demolish everything they've built until then – they could bring the student back to the starting point where he believed he deserved to be abused. He couldn't stand the idea of that son of a bitch affecting Jimin's self-esteem so easily.

"I'll be good from now on, Daddy."

"You already are, angel." The man promised and chastely kissed plump lips. "And I don't want you to ever call yourself bad names again. It's a new rule, okay?"

"Okay." Jimin sniffled and Jungkook reached for his jacket from where he retrieved a napkin he could clean his boyfriend's face with. A few more soft kisses followed, each of them innocent, their purpose being reassurance. Arms were locked safely around the younger's waist so the latter scooted closer, as if he was trying to make the minimal distance in between them disappear. "Daddy?"

"Yes, little one?"

"He told me you can't love someone like me." He would have reproduced the exact words but he promised he wouldn't use that kind of vocabulary anymore.

"He should go and fuck himself." Jungkook groaned, his annoyance growing with each passing second. He wanted to have a word with Daeshim, not wanting him to disturb Jimin when they were not together. "He doesn't know shit, baby." That was what the pink-haired boy wanted to hear so he didn't reply, closing his eyes instead and hiding his face in the crook of the artist's neck.

They stood like that for a while, Jungkook turning on the music and letting the lyrics talk for themselves as he held the smaller one dearly. The days were shorter because Christmas was near so in no time more cars pulled next to theirs to watch the Seoul lights, the sky darkening under their noses.

"Should we go home, kitten?" He believed the answer would come right away but Jimin looked doubtful.

"I don't want to have sex." His voice was small and the brown-haired man's face fell as soon as his brain managed to process what he's been told. Sex had an important role in their relationship but it wasn't a must so he was shocked that the student felt the need to clarify that he wasn't feeling like doing it.

"I was thinking about building a fort." Jungkook smiled and pecked the tip of his nose.

It sounded perfect so the ride towards the apartment felt too long. They both needed to shower so they could clear their minds so Jimin went first, allowing the Dom to think about everything that happened. He wondered how he could manage to meet Daeshim, he wondered if he was supposed to tell his boyfriend or if he should do it without his knowledge. He didn't want to cause more anxiety that was already involved but until then he had to take care of his baby boy. Steamy hot water was pouring over his body when he heard the bathroom door opened so he rinsed his face and turned to watch Jimin who was as white as a sheet.

"What happened?" The boy was holding his cell phone.

"He's calling, Daddy." He muttered a fuck under his breath and grabbed the clean towel he was supposed to dry his body with in order to wrap it around his middle and get out of the shower. There was no contact for the number on the screen but he trusted Jimin was sure of what he said.

"Can Daddy talk to him, baby?" The boy surely didn't want to answer so he nodded cautiously, offering the device to the elder. "Now I'll ask you to be a good boy and do something for me." The student suspected what was to come but he didn't comment. "I want you to go and make two cups of hot chocolate."

It wasn't that Jungkook had abnormally strong cravings, he just didn't want his baby to hear that man ever again. He was also scared that he wouldn't be able to control his mouth and he didn't want to scare the other when his anger had nothing to do with him. The ringtone was what made Jimin snap out of it and decided to head to the kitchen, even if curiosity was eating his insides.

As soon as the door closed Jungkook tapped on the green dot on the right side of the screen and brought the phone to his ear, impatient to talk.

"Ji –"

"You're talking to Jeon Jungkook." He interrupted and a small pause followed, the tension obvious between the two of them. "I've heard you've taken a sudden interest in my submissive." His tone was filled with bitterness and he almost felt bad for needing to talk about Jimin so coldly. They were not in a simple Dominant/submissive relationship anymore, they were in love.

"I would have never imagined that you wanted him for yourself. That is why you stepped in that night, huh?" He was already getting annoyed so he ran his fingers through his somewhat damp hair.

"I intervened because you were acting like the poor excuse of a dom that you are. Ignoring your submissive's safe word means violating the BDSM ethic and you should be ashamed of yourself."

"Thank God for princes charming such as yourself." The conversation was already facing more sarcasm than Jungkook could handle with someone he despised so he felt the anger beginning to rise within, thankful that they weren't talking face to face. "You're so high up your ass you think you can steal other people's subs."

That was it.

"Listen to me, you piece of shit." His inhales and exhales were already becoming irregular. "Jimin wouldn't have gone back to you after that night either way."

"It wouldn't have been the first ti –"

"You fucked him up, you fucking son of a bitch. You traumatised him –" A dry laughter met him at the other end.

"And you decided to have my hand-me-downs. You think you're so much better than me but does he know that's what you're thinking?" It was almost shocking how good Daeshim was at using his words in order to manipulate but Jungkook was not going to give in.

"If you ever come near him or try to contact him again I'll break your fucking neck."

"It's just a matter of time, Jeon. He'll come to me by himself, he's not blind. He knows you could do better." For the first time, the tattoo artist was lest speechless, a cold shiver running down his spine. He never took that possibility in consideration. No. Jimin was aware of how loved he was, he was doing his best to show him that every day. "But until then, enjoy my sloppy seconds."

"Go fuck yourself!" He yelled and threw the phone on threw the phone towards the wall, watching it as it smashed against the tiles. Everything became blurry around him and he covered his face with both hands, unable to control the rage he was feeling. He couldn't remember ever being so upset since moving out from his parents' place but the sound of the door opening made him go back to his senses and he turned around to find Jimin staring at his destroyed smartphone in horror.

Fuck.

That was his boyfriend's phone, not his own.

"Min –" It was too late because tears were already cascading his face. That's when all the anger was replaced with worry and he headed towards the boy who stepped back. He was looking like he has seen a ghost, his eyes never moving from the intimidating figure and Jungkook's stomach twisted at the idea that he scared his baby. "I won't –" A knot formed inside his neck. "Daddy won't hurt you, baby."

Jimin was still crying and he covered his face with sweater paws, feeling exhausted. He was feeling little and he was having the worst possible day, it was like the earth ran from under his feet.

"Come here, kitten." He encouraged but the boy didn't move so he slowly walked closer, waiting for a reaction. The smaller one began trembling when strong arms wrapped around his body and Jungkook felt his eyes turning glassy. He was not his father. "I'm so sorry, little one. Daddy didn't mean to break your phone, I promise you I'll buy you a new one." Jimin didn't answer, still overwhelmed by the events and the shaking needed a few minutes to stop, just like the tears.

They quietly moved to the kitchen after Jungkook changed into comfortable clothing and the elder's heart shattered when he saw the two cups of hot chocolate placed on the table. Little marshmallows have been added, forming one large heart on top of each.

"I've been good." The pink-haired boy's voice was hoarse and Jungkook hurried to kiss his forehead.

"My perfect baby." He whispered and cupped his chin in order to tilt his head back. "I'm so sorry, Min. Please forgive me, I didn't want to –"

"I know. It's okay." Jimin raised on his tiptoes to press their mouths together gently before intertwining their fingers and guiding the elder towards the table. He wanted to forget all about the last 24 hours but that wasn't possible so he was trying to focus on the present, even if it was a complicated task. He knew his Daddy took care of his problem and he didn't even want to know about the conversation he had with Daeshim, he trusted him 100%. "Do you like it?"

"It's so pretty, angel." Jungkook praised him and pulled him so he would sit on his lap. "Just like you."

Jimin smiled weakly and wrapped his hands around his mug so he would enjoy the warmth of it. They ended up building the prettiest fort they decorated with fairy lights and the younger didn't forget to bring the only stuffed animal he had around inside before resting against the many pillows. Taehyung was his usual fort buddy but it has been a few years since they last did that and he missed it. A warm body welcomed him against it and he rested his head on Jungkook's chest, his eyes searching the way the lights were glimmering.

"We'll buy a new phone the first thing in the morning, okay?" The brown-haired man was obviously still ashamed of what he has done; he didn't have the right to break things that didn't belong to him but he was grateful his boyfriend understood that hasn't been his initial intention.

"Okay."

"Minnie..." The words seemed to stop before reaching his lips but he gathered his thoughts and tried again. "I would never hurt you." The affirmation came out as a whisper and Jimin felt his distress because he moved so their eyes could meet. Jungkook's doe eyes were betraying the anguish he was feeling and the pink haired boy furrowed his eyebrows at the alien image.

"I know." His lips found their way towards the elder's forehead. "You're always good to me. You're kind and you take care of me."

"I love you." The back of his hand caressed a chubby cheek lovingly, encouraging his baby to lie down next to him so they could cuddle.

"I love you too." He wanted to say more but he kept his wishes for himself, afraid they wouldn't come true once he would share them. He hoped they could be in love forever, he hoped Jungkook would never get tired or bored of him, he hoped he could stay this happy. "Thank you for today."

"I'll always be here for you when you need me." Jimin smiled shyly and kissed the other's shoulder through the material parting him from the skin. "It's been a shitty day but tomorrow will be better."

A finger raised in the air only to be hooked by a longer one.

"Pinky promise." The tattoo artist added and pulled his boyfriend even closer.