Chapter 13

Jay saw his partner fall when she managed to throw the offender off the motorcycle and could imagine the pain she felt when she landed with so much force on her knee. He also saw the way she was limping when they got back to the station, and he couldn't get a chance to ask her if she was okay before they left. But he couldn't get it out of his head, and his anxiety grew as time went by until he decided to do what she had done for him some time ago. Come to her house to make sure she was okay. He stopped first at her neighborhood mini-market, buying a few beers for him and a big box of ice cream. A short time later, he found himself in front of her door, knocking on the wooden surface a few times. He didn't know why, but he was nervous. However, any nervousness disappeared as soon as she opened the door, and she smiled at him.

"Jay? Hi" she says, and he can see the surprise in her eyes. He immediately returns the smile. Emma opens the door more, allowing him to get in, no questions asked. 

Jay tries to see the space around him, but his attention falls right on her. She's already wearing her pajamas. A colorful pair of pants and a white shirt bigger than the size she should be wearing. Just above her chest, the word "love" is written in colorful letters. Her look is complemented by her hair braided into low braids. She's really sweet, Jay thinks, and immediately shakes his head when he realizes what he's thinking. Emma lowers her gaze, realizing her appearance, and her cheeks blush straight away, something that doesn't go unnoticed by Jay.

Her partner starts laughing, and after a while, she follows. 

"Emma Spencer, the detective who throws the perpetrators off their bikes, having colorful pajamas. That's interesting," he teases her. 

"Oh, shut up Halstead. You're just jealous. Anyway, what are you doing here?" she asks him. 

"Uh... I wanted to see how you were," he tells sheepishly. 

"I'm fine," she lies. 

"Yeah, and I'm the president," he tells her, and his playful mood returns. Emma raises her eyebrow. 

"Oh, come on. Emms, I saw how you felt before, and you were limping, and now, you're standing throwing your weight to one side and... Wait a minute, is that an ice pack?" he asks her as he looks at the coffee table. Emma looks at him in shock at how observant he is, and after a while, she answers him. 

"Maybe-" Jay rolls his eyes and helps her sit on the couch again despite her objections. 

"You shouldn't have left on your own today. Obviously, you're in pain" 

"Jay..." 

"Okay, okay, I'm stopping. But I brought some ice cream," he announces, and with great intimacy heads to her kitchen, looking for spoons.

While Emma's busy with the ice pack, Jay finally looks at her little apartment. He likes the decoration and the fact that is a small apartment. And he can't help but think they probably have that in common. Both houses are small, with the necessary rooms. In fact, Emma's house doesn't even have a separate place for the bedroom. Instead, the bed is just behind the sofa. But what gets his attention is the books that are everywhere. Two libraries filled with books, shelves with books, and even books on the floor. 

"So, do you like to read?" he asks her with a laugh when he returns from the kitchen giving her a spoon. 

"You're a real detective," she replies, laughing. 

"But yes, it's been my secret pleasure since I was little" 

"Emma Spencer, I really don't know anything about you" 

"Applies to both of us" 

"Oh really? What would you like to know?" he asks her.

"Um, I don't think you really want me to answer that," she replies, eating the ice cream, leaving moan to escape. Jay laughs at this move. 

"Well, I guess I can tell you a few things if you tell me too," he tells her, and Emma looks at him, actually thinking about his offer. 

"Think about it, we've been partners for almost three months now and we know almost nothing about each other" 

"Okay" she replies and they eat a little more. 

"But you start" 

"Well, since I suggested it, I think that's the right thing to do," Jay says, turning around so he can see her better. He doesn't know why he suggested that. He doesn't even know why he wants to know more about her. And certainly, he doesn't know why he doesn't have a problem talking about himself. Even if won't say everything.

"Well, I'm Jay Halstead. I have a brother, Will, whom you've already met, he's older than me. Our mom died years ago, and our dad is... well, it's a long story but we don't get along," he begins to tell her but pauses briefly when referring to his parents. Emma smiles at him, giving him the courage to keep going. 

"Right after high school I went to the army, I was in the Rangers 3rd Battalion 75th. I did two tours, and then they sent me home" he continues, and his eyebrows frown as he thinks about his time in the war. 

"Jay, it's okay," Emma tells him in a sweet voice, and it does help him stay grounded in reality. She wants to know more, but she doesn't say anything. 

"Anyway, shortly after I got back, I went to the academy, a bullet in the shoulder, while I was undercover, was what led me to Intelligence," he takes a breath and thinks about what he forgets. 

"Hmm, family, past, job, what do I forget?" he tells himself aloud, making her laugh. 

"Uh, of course. I had a girlfriend, Erin. You already know that, but you hadn't heard it from me. We lived together, we had our ups and downs, but I was going to propose to her before she left. And that's it," he ends, and looks her in the eye, waiting for her reaction.

He never thought he'd tell her that much, but for some reason, he's not embarrassed that he did. Not even close. It's like a tiny weight has gone off his shoulders. Emma, on the other hand, would be lying if she didn't admit how moved she was by the fact that Jay shared all this with her. She didn't expect him to open up to her like that, but she's glad he did. 

"Thank you," she tells him without explaining why, but she doesn't have to. They both understand what she means, and Jay smiles at her.

"Well, I guess after everything you said, I have to tell you a few things too," she begins, leaving her spoon in the bowl while Jay continues to eat. 

"I'm Emma Spencer. I don't have any brothers or sisters and trust me, if your relationship with your father is a long story then it's a whole book for me," she takes a deep breath. 

"I haven't met my dad, he left long before I was born, as for my mom, she's dead. Overdose. I was 7" she reveals and his eyes widened in shock. This topic is quite vulnerable for Emma even after all these years, but she feels within her that she has to open up to him just as he did. Besides, she really trusted him. 

"Yeah, and that's how I met Herrmann. The day she died, she had a big fight with her boyfriend. Voices, crying, beating, you know, the whole package. He left, she took her dose, lost consciousness, and the kitchen eye was left open. A neighbor called CFD. Herrmann and Mouch were among the firefighters who responded to the call. Christopher was the one who carried me out," she continues. This time it's Jay's turn to reassure her. He leaves the ice cream on the coffee table and touches her good knee.

"Emms, you don't have to tell me. I didn't want to push you," he whispers, regretting that he put her in a difficult position. 

"It's okay. I trust you," she admits, and Jay squeezes her knee. 

"Anyway, after that I was in the system for the rest of my childhood. I changed some houses, but none of them felt like home. Just say that there were a lot of issues. But Christopher was always there for me. So was Cindy. You know, I think they're always going to blame themselves for not adopting me, but that's a story for another time. So after that, I joined the Academy, they took me undercover as soon as I graduated. I was under for more than a year, they promoted me to a detective, and then I met Liv and went to New York. As for relationships, nothing worth mentioning" she finishes and takes the ice off her leg.

They stay quiet for a while looking at each other, with Jay thinking about what he heard. Now, he could finally understand her reaction when Adam and Antonio were fighting. And he can imagine why she doesn't like to drink. Both had been through a lot, but unlike her, Jay voluntarily caused most of what happened to him when he decided to enlist. On the other hand, Emma went through so much while she was still a little kid. When Jay learned all this he admires his partner. He can't understand how she stays optimistic and smiling in any case. 

"You know, I think you're officially one of the strongest people I know," he tells her, and her eyes go-round with a sock. Jay Halstead was a former soldier. He served with so many people who sacrificed their lives. He was ready to sacrifice his own. And yet he thought she was strong. That alone made her heart beat hard. Her hand found his and squeezed it. They didn't have to say anything else. They've already said enough. They only turned to the TV next to each other watching the game that was on.