Lack of Restraint ( R17.5 )
We continued to sway to the music, alternating between the table and the dance floor.
As the night progressed and a few people started to leave, the DJ switched to slower numbers.
Lucy and Jacob were the first to get to it. Lucy was playing coach as Jacob awkwardly stumbled across the floor.
Bless his heart; that guy couldn't dance to save his life!
I turned to Ashley. " ... come here," I said, extending my hand to her.
She smiled shyly but didn't resist; she took my hand and came closer to me.
We locked eyes, standing face-to-face, our bodies inches apart.
Ashley placed her hands gently around my neck and I wrapped my hands around her curvy lower back.
We continued to sway to the music for a bit longer. Ashley took the opportunity to pull me closer, guiding my hands down to her hips and pressing her small chest against me.
As the DJ left after midnight and the music slowly faded in the background, some people started to leave. But the core group remained and we just chatted while we sobered up.
When we finally stumbled out of the party around 2 a.m., most had already left, leaving behind only a few of us—including Ashley and her closest friends.
"Hey, guys, what do you think about an after-party at my place? My parents aren't home tonight." Ashley glanced around at us.
Everyone readility agreed and we walked to Ashley's house, which was just a street away.
Julie and her boyfriend Dylan were with us; Dylan was the football team's captain. The same guy who stepped in between me and the crazy dickhead at that other party.
Jacob went with us as well, because of Lucy.
The area Ashley lived in wasn't fabulous.
A street away, there were rundown flats where a bunch of unemployed scum lived.
Her house was clean, but the place reeked of weed.
I was pretty sure that it wasn't just Ashley smoking, her parents must have smoked as well, otherwise Ashley would have had to keep the smell from invading the house.
We walked through the house to the back, stepping out onto a balcony.
It was quite cozy.
There were swings with plush cushions and a big sofa.
Lucy and Dylan sat on the sofa, Jacob and Lucy cuddled on one of the swings and I settled into the other.
A few seconds later, Ashley came out onto the balcony.
In one hand, she held a small speaker, playing "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World.
In the other hand, she had a pack of papers and a few grams of weed.
She set the speaker on the small table, turning up the volume slightly.
She placed the rolling papers and weed on the table and began to expertly roll a joint.
As she licked the paper, I couldn't help but admire how gorgeous she looked in that black dress.
She lit one joint, gave it to Julie and then handed another one to Lucy.
Then she rolled the third and last one.
As she finished, she turned to me with an intoxicating smile.
The way she looked at me...
This was exactly why I didn't want this party to go like this. Something inside me was waking up, and I knew that fighting it would be against my will.
She sat down beside me and handed me the joint. By the time the third song was playing, we were all pleasantly baked.
"Isn't Linking Park the greatest fuckin' band on earth?" Jacob asked everyone.
Lucy agreed with him and Ashley did too, although it was easy to read her face and see she didn't give a rat's ass about Linking Park.
I tried to remember who teenage girls had been into back in the early 2000s, but came up empty.
Jacob mentioned my car and wanted to know how I earned the cash for it.
Ashley was surprised that I even had a car.
For a few minutes, the talk went around the room, which was long enough for me to be shocked at how dull it was.
Dylan was talking about his recent football games.
Jacob was talking about how many joints he could smoke before he puked.
'Had I been like this once?' I thought.
I feared I had.
No wonder I didn't have a girlfriend until my mid-20s
It was time to liven up the atmosphere a little.
"Have you guys ever considered," I asked, "how much religion has messed up our views on sex?"
That caught their attention. They all looked at me, wondering if I was telling a joke.
"What?" Ashley squealed.
"Think about it for a second," I explained, knowing fully well that when you were high, it was really easy to 'think about it'.
But at that point, I was living in the moment and I wanted to continue doing just that.
"After the need for food and water, the strongest urge in a person is the desire to reproduce. We want to have sex; we need to have sex. It's programmed into us—into our genes and chromosomes. If a species didn't want to have sex, it would not perpetuate itself."
"Per-what?" Jacob asked, his eyes opening less than a quarter inch.
"It would not keep the race alive." I rephrased. "If we were not programmed with the urge to screw each other, we would have died out long ago. So, the urge to screw is given to us by God or chance or whatever, so that we will survive forever."
"Yeah," Ashley said, her eyes twinkling a little. The rest had to agree with my logic too.
"But then you got religion," I went on. "There's some other social factors in there too, but religion is the biggest one. Here you have a natural urge—the urge to reproduce. It's a function of your body. But you have religion telling you it's dirty. They make people feel guilty for these urges, which occur through no fault of their own. First, they say you should never do it before getting married. Then they say, You can do it after getting married, but not to enjoy it. If you enjoy it, you're sinning."
"Yeah!" Jacob said, "That's fucked up."
"Now we all feel these urges. I myself feel them very strongly." I looked meaningfully at Ashley as I said this. She blushed a little but held my gaze.
"And if that wasn't bad enough," I continued, watching Ashley carefully now. She was staring with rapt attention. "Religious influence throughout our history has led to the passing of laws against certain types of sexual acts. Did you know that in The State of Florida it is illegal for a man to eat pussy?"
"What?" Ashley exclaimed.
"For sure!" Dylan shouted out of the blue.
Yeah... he was high as fuck.
"Yep." I nodded, taking another hit. "It's also illegal for a woman to give a blowjob. Oral sex is listed as a crime. Now here we have an activity that people enjoy doing to each other. An activity that hurts no one but that, in fact, brings a great deal of pleasure to people. At least I know I enjoy the shit out of it. But, thanks to assholes back in our history, it's illegal."
"You've never eaten pussy before, Jack," Ashley giggled, her eyes shining.
I looked at her meaningfully. "Ashley, I bet that I could make you come in less than ten minutes using only my tongue."
She swallowed nervously. "Oh really?"
"Really," I said. "Come here a second." I patted my lap.
"Why?" she challenged.
"Just come here and let me give you a little sample," I told her. "Unless you're scared, that is. Afraid I might make you lose control."
"You talk pretty bold, little boy," she said teasingly.
She hesitated for another second or so and then curiosity got the better of her.
She stood up to her feet.
"Sit down," I told her, reaching out and touching the side of her right leg.
She adjusted the hem of her dress, sat on my lap and turned her face toward me.
She stared at my face with her eyes fixed on mine. "Well?" she said.
I reached out and took her face in my hands, feeling the soft skin of her cheeks.
I pulled her forward slowly, drawing her lips to mine. She came willingly, parting her lips. I kissed her softly, feeling her puffy lips meet mine.
I darted the tip of my tongue forward slowly, touching the inside of her lip and running it back and forth, feeling the back of my tongue rubbing against her top teeth.
I withdrew my tongue for an instant and then darted forward with it once more.
Her tongue shot out to meet it this time.
I swirled the tip of mine with hers, marveling at the fact that I was making out with someone as beautiful as Ashley.
One of my thoughts at that moment was that I didn't want to hurt her; I needed to know her feelings to know how far I could go.