Five: Waking up as a... Baby?!!

After that entire fiasco, I was surrounded in darkness, avoid that was dark and bottomless. Oddly enough, when someone speaks about being in a dark void, it is often described as a cold desolate place. Though I was not cold, I was warm. For once in my life, I actually felt safe.... It reminded me too much of my father.

'You really suffered, I see not one not one happy memory... Although, it seems you made two friends, and here I wished you had more. Poor child.'

I wasn't entirely sure what was speaking, but the voice seemed to surround me, and there was no record of gender. Another thing that was weirding me out was that I could tell or rather I could feel someone reaching in and searching my memories reading it as if it was an open book. It made me uncomfortable, whatever this creature or being or entity was seeing it was being played back full force in my mind's eye.

'You've suffered more than I've seen anybody in a very long time. You're only escape was nature and those weird picture books you were reading... How very interesting.'

The voice seem to reach me again, thought it sounded familiar to me, yet I couldn't put my finger on where I heard it. Through it all, I willed myself to pay attention and listen, wincing as I experience the last moment that was once my life. Somehow I could see, even though I felt like I should have been a formless thing of energy, but I was not. It was then when I begin to notice that the darkness became so comfortable in for starting to slowly eliminate as something grew closer to me.

I blinked as the light became almost unbearing for my eyes and then suddenly it didn't. Standing in front of me was a spiritual entity that could only be called God. It was odd because I wasn't a religious person, I was spiritual and the things I believed in was nothing religious so I felt like the word god was not the correct terminology for this being.

"Do I know you?" My voice, which was still the voice I remembered, rang around me just like the beings voice once did. Its eyes studied me as I looked back at it and confusion, another sense of familiarity striking me once again. He was warm, so warm, so loving that it made no sense... And yet, I knew I felt this before, but I was stumped on where. The only response I got was a warm chuckle I seem to make my insides feel weird.

'Do you...? Maybe you do and maybe you don't, but I have known you, your entire life. I'm sorry you were taken from your world before it was time.'

"Before my time?" I blinked in confusion until I dawned on me on what the being said.

'To be completely clear the harsh hand delt to you was never yours, a mistake. None of this was supposed to happen. you're not supposed to be here yet.'

The being genuinely seemed sad as we floated in the middle of nowhere. For me to hear those words, I could feel my eyes blurry and that is if the water gates had broken, I started to cry.

'To hear that is such a relief, but I'm still dead... I was ripped away from a future I wanted for myself... I didn't have a chance.' my thoughts were somber, dark as I really looked back on what used to be my life.

'I'm here to make a proposition for you.' the being stepped closer and placed what I thought to be it's hand right at the center of my chest. 

'Even through your trials and tribulations you chose to be strong. Not everybody can be, sometimes it takes the littlest things to break someone into millions of pieces. I want you to know that from watching you all this time, I never once gave up on you. Even though I failed  to save you the first time, I won't make the same mistake again so, you have a choice.'

Those four words ring in my head over and over again, and I tilted my head a confusion as I waited anxiously to hear his pitch. The being started walking around me in a small circle with its arms around its back, their eyes never leaving my form.

'You'll be granted the choice to start over, the way you want to. I'm offering you a chance to reincarnate in a place, in a world where you truly want to be. Do you accept?'

I could feel my eyes widen at the statement that was just made, wondering if this being meant any world. I didn't take me too long to give an answer, with the determination in my eyes I nodded my head as I waited for the creature to finish.

'First question, where is it that you want to go?'

The being was standing in front of me once again, it's head tilted to one side is it waited for my reply.

Again I wasted no time answering, only because I related to the story when I was once living, and as many times as I finish the story couldn't help but read it over and over again. "The world of Hunter x Hunter."I watched his face shift, a slight grimace on its face and just staring at me and confusion.

'You want to be in the world with pedophilic clowns and emotionless assassins? You really are an odd one.' the creature gave another warm chuckle as it slowly shook its head.

He wasn't wrong, I took a strange liking to Illumi when I read the story only because in a strange way I could understand how he was. Hisoka, he on the other hand was someone I had to take with the grain of salt but it didn't mean I didn't find him interesting. I also knew I had a strange connection to the both of them. I ve been hearing them speak to me since I was a child, so, why wouldn't I want to enter the world of the two who did nothing put do their best to protect me.

"Wait— my neckless... The needle .. the card!! I need—"

'No need to worry, they'll never leave you. There tired to your soul, so don't worry about ever loosing them.'

I sighed with releaf and really thought about my decision; I guess having a fucked up life beforehand meant I had fucked up taste in men. Funny thing about the whole situation was I despise clowns, I hate it though with the passion.

'Question two, what are your preferences?'

I wasn't entirely sure what the creature meant by the question, but I knew this time around I didn't want to be perceived as a legal. I wanted to be strong enough to handle situations on my own if it ever came around to it. I never wanted to ever be in a situation I was before I passed away. I refuse to think about such a thing happened to me ever again I wouldn't allow it.

'I see, what a strong Spirit you have there. I didn't even have to hear you say the words... Your intentions, your determination, your will said it all. You shall be granted the strength you desire. I said I wouldn't fail this time around to protect you.... I intend to keep my word.'

The creature wore a proud expression on its face as he gazed at me. It stepped closer and placed a warm finger right where my third eye would be, his eyes glowing for a long moment before diming down.

'Last question... Is there anything else you wish to ask for?'

I blinked, somewhat stunned by the last question it asked. All my life I wanted freedom, at least in this world that's what I would be getting. I had the strength and the will to put my thoughts into action, and trying to get away but that was taken away from me. I wasn't entirely sure what I wanted, I asked you to feel like it was appropriate to even ask, I just stared at him with this thoughtful expression.

I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. What shocked me more was the knowing smile that was on its face. The being stepped back form me and gave me another warming chuckle before he waved his hand in the space between us slowly starting to fade form my view.

'Dont worry. I've got you covered, now go and enjoy what life has in store for you. You deserve it more than anything ' with that final statement I was surrounded in darkness again only to wake up to a blinding light piercing my retnas.

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"Well isn't she a beauty?" I could hear collective voices, but this particular one was warm and close my ears seemed to vibrate with it.

"She's rather calm though, I don't think I've ever seen a baby not cry after it's born? Doctor do you think something is wrong?" The voice spoke again and a face invaded my vision. It was a man, his skin was a couple of shades lighter than what mine used to be [I'm hoping I still have my beautiful brown skin] but his eyes were what startled me, they were silver and piercing.

I was also confused at to why his face was so big, but then I remembered them saying the word baby. I blinked up at him, who I figured to be my father and stared on stunned, going completely still in the man's arms. Others crowded around to see what was going on, trying to understand why I stopped moving.

I thought back to the conversation I had with the creature that pretty much just reincarnated me and figured out that I was starting over my life as an infant.

My face twisted up and I balled my fist before a piercing wail escaped my lips along with the collective sound of glass shattering, the entire room erupting into chaos.

I was a baby!!! WHY WAS I A BABY! WHY COULDNT I BE FIVE??!! At least then I could do something. Here I was going to be trapped in a weak body bundled in blankets laying on my back all day, crying and wailing and freaking sleeping only to wake up and cry for food!!! Nooo!

While the chaos continued, my father looked down at me with a proud smile, gently brushing his nose against my forehead, chuckling. His laugh put me at ease and immediately stopped my wailing as I did nothing but stared up at him. "That's my girl, just like daddy." He laughed again and unconsciously I gaved him a gummy smile.

"Welcome home..."

I blushed at the in sink whispers and shuddered know just wontbeh were from, which really made me wonder. Maybe this wouldn't be too bad. All the more time for me to grow strong and experience what a loving family is like.

I didn't regret my decision, not one bit.