29 I'll try
"Because I know you're worth it."
Jacksons lips come crashing down on mine, stealing my breath and my thoughts, sweeping me away in a whirlwind of passionate caresses.
"You're not," He starts in between his kisses, "going to" his hands work their way down to the hem of my skirt, "push me away." He lifts the hem of my skirt above my thighs, his hand slipping between them.
"Jacks!" I exclaim, surprised by his sudden hunger and demanding kisses. He trails those kisses down my jaw, making my eyes flutter at the sensation.
"Lita, don't try and push me away. I'm not going anywhere." He breathes heavily against my neck, placing a kiss next to my ear. His hand snakes under my underwear, trailing his fingers through my folds. "Now, I'm going to make it up to you for earlier."
His hand gets to work, building me up as he rubs my flesh, concentrating on my bundle of nerves.
"Oh god!" My hand shoots down and grips is arm, like it could actually stop those fingers from doing anything. "Please... not...." I don't want his hand to get me off. I want him.
His lips are sealed on my neck kissing and nipping at the skin, "Don't tell me you want me to stop. I don't want to stop until I'm buried deep inside of your wet cunt, painting your walls in white."
His erotic choice of words has my insides coiling tighter at the thought.
"Yes." I moan, spreading my legs for him. He hums pleased at my willingness to do just that. My hands move fumbling to undo his shirt and pants as he builds the tension up in my body.
His hand disappears, leaving me panting as he stands and removes his clothing. I quickly shimmy out of my skirt and blouse. My bra remains as Jackson's body joins me back on the bed, one of his arms hooking under my leg, while the other slides under my side. He moves me farther onto the bed, nestling himself in between my legs. His length rubbing against my entrance making me whimper in want. He takes my other leg and presses them back, pinning me to the bed.
I can see clearly as his hard cock enters me and I enjoy watching as he pounds me into bliss before coming on my stomach. When we are both satiated and Jackson grabs a towel for my stomach, embarrassment starts to set in.
"Jackson, what are we doing?" I ask him as the thought enters my mind.
"What do you mean?" Jackson leans back and looks at me in question.
"I mean... What is this between us? What do you want from me? From us? Because I'm confused and I don't know what to do or think right now." I take a breath, "You've said you want to be with me, but you've also said that if I'm not ready to be in a relationship with you, we should go back to being just friends until I am. Then you also say I need therapy, but then you fuck my brains out and I'm just..." I grip my forehead, my head hurting from trying to straighten my thoughts out, "I'm just confused."
Jackson sighs, "I can see why you would be." He rolls over on to his side to face me and takes my hand to hold. He looks off into space and it's obvious he's straightening out his thoughts.
"Melita, I want to be with you. I've wanted you for a very long time. However, I know you are not going to be exactly what I've dreamt of for so long. I also know I don't have the patience to deal with irrational behavior, accusations, lies, and problems that arise from lack of communication. I also understand that no one is perfect and that everyone has their hiccups. All of those things, I'm willing to handle if you get some professional help and make an effort. That doesn't mean you can get away with treating me like dirt or not communicating with me and expecting me to know what's wrong. If you are not ready to do that, I will still remain your friend. It will be hard but I'll respect that. I will always be here for you now. Just please, don't push me out of your life is all I ask of you."
"So what you want to be with me, but ..." I start as he adds to the end of my sentence.
"But I still expect you to be considerate and respectful of my thoughts and emotional well being as well as your own if you want to still attempt a relationship with me. That's all I'm asking of you, but I'm leaving the choice up to you." Jackson informs me.
He's not asking something that's unreasonable. His execution of his terms could have been delivered in a more tactful manner but I could do the same too. Do I really need to speak with someone? Therapy? Ethan had suggested it when I told him about what I went through, but never really pushed it. Maybe if I had, we would still be together? Maybe I do need it. It seemed to work for Jackson, even if he still has his issues, I can see he tries to work through them.
I chew my bottom lip in thought, not sure what to say yet. He looks at me with hope in his eyes, but his face is stoic though as if he's resigned his fate if I say the wrong thing. I want Jackson I do, but I have no desire to hurt him or ruin our friendship.
He leans over and places a kiss on my forehead, "Think about it. You don't have to answer me right at this moment."
He stays next to me, pulling my body closer to his before pulling the blanket up over our naked bodies. He lets out a heavy breath and just holds me quietly as a million thoughts run through my head.
What would I do to not react the way I'm used to? Who would I go to for therapy that I could find a way to go see and no one from work would find out? Am I wanting a relationship? Feeling Jacksons arms around me is soothing and a balm on my heart that's been more lonely than I think I ever realized. Do I want to give that up?
"Jackson?" My voice sounds weak as I start fiddling with the hair on his chest.
"Yes?" He lets out a heavy breath, his body tensing.
"I'll..." My voice is so soft I clear my throat so I can speak louder, "I'll try." I tuck my head into his chest as the tension heightens in his body but then slowly starts to fade. His hands caress my back and touch me tenderly.
"That's my girl." He whispers into my hair before kissing the top of my head. His hands stroke my back, tracing my spine as I relax into his arms and fall asleep.
I'm awoken by warmth pressed against my back and I wiggle to try and become more enveloped by it. I'm being poked by something hard against my ass cheeks when I remember where I am. I move to wiggle away, but Jacksons warm strong arms only tighten around me as he groans and moves against me. He pivots his hips pressing forward until he finds my entrance.
"Jackson are you awake?" I ask as he rocks his body lazily against me, not able to enter me with how he's holding me.
He grunts and presses harder against me, until I lift my leg and allow him to enter me. I couldn't move my arms at all with how he was holding me. As soon as I feel him sliding into my channel, he sighs, and lazily begins thrusting into me. His lips start to caress the nape of my neck, leaving me gasping and wanting more.
"Jacks..." I breathe his name out and feel one of his hands make it's way down to play with my clit.
"Good morning." Jacks gruff, sleep-filled voice caresses my ear as his thrusts become gain momentum. His arm that holds me against his body comes up, his hand circling my throat in his firm grasp as he begins to thrust harder into my body.
I can't take much more as he plays with my clit, my breathing impaired from his hand around my neck, I'm going to cum soon.
"You feel so fucking good, baby. I'm going to cum already. Let me cum inside of you baby?"
His words only turn me on even more as I scream out, "YES!"
My strangled cry as my orgasm hits me is overwhelming, just as I feel hot warmth flood my insides and we both are shaking and quivering from our release.
"Hmmm.... Very good morning." He rumbles into my hair, making me suppress a laugh.
"That's an understatement." I giggle, making him groan.
"Fuck that feels good when you laugh and I'm still inside of you." He squeezes me tighter against his chest as I giggle again. His response is to thrust his still semi hard cock into my body, holding me to him.
"I should go get cleaned up. I'm sure it's almost time for us to get up for work." I press against the arm holding me to him and he lets me go with a resigned sigh.