"How are you feeling now?" I crouched before Jaehyeon who was sitting on the floor.
"Much better." He nodded and put on the mic and in-ear monitor that I had brought him. "The medicine's helped."
He had said that he had a really bad headache but we could do little more than give him a tablet for it. We were already at the venue we were to perform at, fully dressed and ready. He had had just about ten minutes to rest. "Are you sure? Do you want a few more minutes?"
"Are we going on?"
"Yes. Five minutes." I replied.
"Okay. I'm good. Let's go." He held both hands out to me. I stood up, took them firmly in mine and pulled him onto his feet. Then I gave him a big hug and lightly clapped his back. "Hang in there, Hyung."
"Are you good to go?" Mingyu asked on seeing us.
"Yes." Jaehyeon gave him a thumbs-up. Yeojun and Hanseol who had also seen this looked relieved.
We got ready off-stage. When we were given the one-minute sign, we huddled up and Mingyu led us in our usual before-stage team cheer.
"Let's show True all we've got. Together." He held out his hand in the centre of the circle. "Let's go." We piled our hands on top of his and cheered. "Let's do this!"
It hadn't been sold-out but the venue looked full to us from onstage. I could also see a few guys among the screaming fans and innumerous signboards and light sticks. A couple of years ago, this kind of a sight would have been unimaginable for us- even back in South Korea. And yet, here we were, sharing our space with our international fans at an international venue. None of us would sit this out, if we could help it.
I did keep an eye on Jaehyeon during our routines. He seemed to have been really alright though. As we moved from one song to the other, I started to get less worried about him.
We had saved performing Sandbox for the end. We were performing a song titles 'Jal Hae' from the album preceding Blue Ink. Now that we had gotten this popular and were holding exclusive concerts, our old songs were garnering attention too. That also meant that we had to re-learn and practice our older routines as well. It was taking a toll on all of us but we were also as motivated as never before. The anxiety and the excitement were driving us to push ourselves harder.
"I will turn off the sun if I want to." Hanseol was at the centre for this part. On his right were Yeojun and Jaehyeon at the front and back respectively and on his left were Mingyu and I. The dance routine at this segment involved a full-on scramble to get to our next positions as Jaehyeon began singing. It gave us very little time to stop and think about where to go. I had purely relied on muscle memory to get me to my place in time.
"Yeah. Yeah. Go! We go!" Hanseol finished up his rap and immediately after, we ran for our next positions. I was still at the back but on the opposite side and Hanseol was to be where I was earlier. Mingyu, Yeojun and Jaehyeon were up front but their places had been shuffled from how they had been before. And we had just about a beat and a half to get in place.
I had managed to make it and just as the triumph got me to smile, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Hanseol had slipped and hit the stage hard. The others had noticed too but we couldn't quite spare more than a glance in concern because we were in the middle of the performance.
Come on, Hanseol. Get up.
He did not get up though. By the time we had progressed into the chorus, he had moved his mic away from his mouth and had pressed a hand to his eyes and was breathing heavily.
That… did not look good.
The moment the chorus ended, I removed my mic and shouted towards the others to be heard over the music. "Cover for us." I got their confirmations through the nods that Jaehyeon and Mingyu had given me.
"Hanseol-ah!" I was at his side in an instant after that. "Talk to me."
"No. It hurts." He groaned. "I can't move."
Oh God.
I looked off-stage to find Manager Park and our staff members waiting, motioning for me to bring him in, looking ready to run out to us.
Okay. I needed to get him to them.
Since he had said that he couldn't move, I was scared to touch him but I removed his mic and slowly tried to get him up. "Sorry. This might hurt. Hold on to me."
The performance was going on behind us. The audience had gotten a lot quieter but they were still cheering as if trying to show their support and tell us that things were okay.
"Argh!" Hanseol let out a cry in pain when I moved him just a little bit. It scared me enough to actually bring tears to the corners of my eyes but I couldn't just stop there. I looked over at Manager Park for help and he immediately came onstage with another staff member. The lights were focused on those who were performing and so the struggle was probably not as visible to the audience. That was a good thing.
"Slowly." The other staff member who had come up happened to have been part of our medical team on call, much to my relief. He instructed us on what to do. When we got him up was when I noticed the light stick that was lying on the stage. Realisation of what had happened dawned on me immediately. Someone from the crowd had thrown this onstage and Hanseol had stepped on it without having seen it.
I couldn't help but glance towards the audience in utter disbelief. I hoped that whoever was responsible for this would realise that this was because of them and that they would learn a lesson.
We had always had a medical team on stand-by and they had pretty much jumped into action, prepared to take Hanseol from us as soon as we had gone offstage. They laid a blanket over a bench and lay him down on it. It was evident from the way he had scrunched up his face and was gritting his teeth that he was in a lot of pain.
"Hanseol-ah…" I could just stand there beside him as the medical staff did their bit. I was absolutely helpless. He was the kind to not ever show us any discomfort and therefore, to see him writhing in agony like that made me lose my composure.
"Jeongwoo-ssi." Manager Park called, grabbing me by my shoulders and turning me away from Hanseol and towards himself. "You need to go back out there."
I… knew that. Jaehyeon was covering my parts and the other two were taking care of Hanseol's parts but they wouldn't be able to keep that up for too long. "Is he o-okay? I need to… say something when I go back up there."
Manager Park looked at the medical status. "How does it look?"
"He's twisted his ankle really badly. Looks like he's hurt his back too. We can't really tell for sure without checking but he should be okay. It'll take time. He'll need lots of rest."
"He had said that… he couldn't move." I reported.
"It's his back." One of them reassured me. "He couldn't move because of the pain."
While that was not anything to shirk off all concern with, it was relieving to know that it wasn't anything serious. "Hanseol-ah." I moved closer to him and caught his arm, careful not to hurt him. "I'll have to go back now. They said you'll be okay. Wait for us, alright? You're strong."
"Ah… Go." He grunted. "Fast. Go. For me too."
"Yes. I understand." I nodded, feeling significantly better after he said that. I then looked at Manager Park. "I'll go now then. I'll leave him to you and the others."
"Don't reveal too much. We're still not sure. There will be an official statement later." Manager Park gave my shoulder a good squeeze. "You're okay. K-Soul-ssi will be okay too."
"Okay." I nodded again and waited till the other three were done with 'Jal Hae' before stepping back onstage.
All eyes were on me in that very moment, including those of my members. I adjusted my mic and went over to pick up and put away the light stick before addressing everyone. I couldn't speak about the details or the light stick and so, to pick up and put it away that obviously when everyone was watching was the most that I could have done. "K-Soul-ssi got injured when he fell just now, as most of you must have noticed. He's… getting medical help as we speak. He'll be okay." I should probably add this- "He asked me to tell you, 'I'm okay' and 'Don't worry'. He wants this show to go on so we'll be having our final performance of Sandbox as well." The fact that this was an international show meant that a majority of the audience would not have understood what I had just said. I was nervous, but I needed to do this. "K-Soul said… 'Don't worry.' Ah… We… move on. Next song… Sandbox." Hopefully that was enough. The small cheer that had gone up told me that they had mostly understood it too. I turned to my members who still seemed worried but had no choice other than to believe in my words at that moment. "Guys."
"For K-soul." Jaehyeon nodded and turned back to the audience with Mingyu and Yeojun who seemed to quickly have come to an agreement about covering Hanseol's parts. There was little that we could do about the choreography but, thankfully, it wasn't a routine that would be too severely affected if one of us was missing.
We got through Sandbox without much of an issue. We had all practiced so much that we could cover our parts without needing to think too much about it and that allowed us to concentrate on filling the gaps that Hanseol's absence had created.
We did not stay on for long after the performance to talk to True because all of us really just wanted to go see Hanseol ourselves.
"Manager-nim!" Mingyu was the first one to reach him. "Hanseol Hyung?"
"They took him to the hospital." Manager Park reported. "It's just a sprained ankle and back but they wanted to be careful. They'll probably give him a painkiller too."
"He did seem to be in a lot of pain." I recalled. "Did he say anything?"
Manager Park sighed. "He apologised. 'I'm really sorry'. For not having been careful."
"There was no way that he could have seen that. It was dark too." I frowned, my blood boiling at the thought of what had happened. "Honestly though, stage safety is one thing but actually throwing a light stick like that?!"
"I'm pretty sure that they've learnt their lesson." Jaehyeon placed a hand on my right shoulder. "Let's not make an issue out of it."
I averted my eyes. I was upset and angry.
"We'll address the matter in the statement." Manager Park said. "Jeongwoo-ssi, you did the right thing earlier. Thank you for having done that."
"There's… no need to thank me." I was scared too- so incredibly scared. "I'm just glad that it's nothing more serious."
"Mm. You can see him in his room once he's brought back." Manager Park said. "For now, let's get you all back to the hotel."
"What about tomorrow's performance though?" Yeojun ventured a question. "If Hanseol Hyung won't be able to take part, we'll have to do something about the choreography. Some routines are okay but…"
"We'll try to get the hotel's convention hall. You need to get at least some rest though." Manager Park said. "You've worked hard enough for today. Eat and sleep as soon as you get back. You can wake up after at least two hours and work on the choreography. If you finish up early, get some rest after that too. We can't afford to have one more of you going down."
That sounded good enough to me. The others offered no objections either. In fact, no one said anything. We were all a little shaken up and lost with all that had happened and all that was left to be done.
"S.T.A.Y." Manager Park called, hands on his hips. "Look at me." We did. "You've done this before. You've even lost sleep over practice. Take a moment to take in where you are. You know best what you've been through together to get here. You know what you have overcome. Noe is not the time to feel lost."
"Manager-nim's right." Mingyu spoke up. "We're just a little too overwhelmed and worried about thigs. Let's sleep on this and start afresh. Hanseol Hyung's counting on us too. Let's do this properly for his sake, for us and for True."
Ah. That's our leadernim for you.
"Yes. Let's do this!" Jaehyeon slapped my bac, making me chuckle too. "We're S.T.A.Y!"
"But how is your headache, Hyung?" I enquired.
"I'd forgotten about it." He replied. "Don't worry. Two hours of sleep will bring me back to normal."
"Two hours are hardly enough but we need you too." Mingyu sighed and looked around at us. "Do not push yourselves to a breaking point, okay? As much as we all need to work hard, none of that is more important than your health. It will worry True too. Let's not make room for any trouble through our own regrets."
"Yes." We all agreed and then Yeojun held out his arms. "Group hug!"
Mingyu smiled and gave in while Jaehyeon readily pulled me along into the group hug as well. We huddled up close, heads together and Yeojun spoke. "We're okay."
"Ah. We're okay." Jaehyeon echoed.
It was a strong and quick group hug and pep talk. Short but effective. Manager Park waited for us and once we were done, he gave us each a reassuring pat on the shoulder and guided us out of there.
We had a lot of work ahead of us.