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Warhammer 40K: I Don’t Want to Be a Tin Can!

This is a translation- Original Author: Night Tales by a Dim Lamp In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war. The Emperor walks among men, striving to restore the glory of the Imperium. Yet, the fate of humanity has long been toyed with by the malevolent Chaos Gods. In this tumultuous future, there is naught but endless darkness and warfare. That is, until the appearance of a Deathwatch Marine named Hades. As the threads of destiny intertwine, can this outsider change the tragic fate that awaits countless souls? The gods place their bets. Yet, Hades remains oblivious to all of this. At present, he's weeping like a snotling that's had its toe stepped on. "Emperor's mercy! Why am I in the Warhammer universe?!" "And why in Terra's name am I a Deathwatch Marine?!" "Is it too late to bash my head in and respawn?!" A comedic tale where a nerdy, unserious protagonist finds himself in the grimdark Warhammer world, oscillating between moments of sheer terror and bouts of uncontrollable sobbing.

Read_and_Chill · Book&Literature
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Chapter 38: The Guide to Canister Transformation

Aboard the *Emperor's Dream*, in the surgical chamber.

The sterile operating room was dominated by a surgical table in the center, bathed in the glow of pristine white lights from above.

Countless intricate instruments surrounded the table, with various pumps rhythmically moving, their liquids churning continuously.

Researchers opened a sealed nutrient canister. Inside, a set of vibrant organs pulsated ceaselessly. Compared to the standard organs transplanted into Astartes, these were noticeably larger, more robust, and teeming with life.

These organs had been meticulously calibrated to be compatible with Hades's current age and physique. Moreover, fragments of the Emperor's genes had been introduced into the nutrient solution.

Firstly, to ensure that the transformed Hades would possess exceptional physical attributes.

Secondly, to cultivate organs specifically designed to suppress the foreign attributes within him.

However, as the organ transplantation succeeds, the rejection between the two would diminish, eventually nullifying the suppressive effect.

This was precisely what the Emperor intended.

After genetic processing, Mortarion's blood was also introduced. This blood would further strengthen the bond between the Primarch Mortarion and Hades.

Typically, a Primarch exerts a hierarchical influence over their gene-sons.

Due to this influence, Astartes naturally submit to their Primarch, often emulating certain behavioral traits of their gene-sire. Some even begin to physically resemble their Primarch over time.

However, since Hades's transformation organs contained fragments of the Emperor's genes and a significant amount of Mortarion's blood, this dominant influence would be diminished.

It would be more of an equal relationship rather than one of dominance.

Regardless, this was their personal affair, and the Emperor wasn't particularly interested in it.

The inclusion of Mortarion's blood, to strengthen their bond, was merely an added layer of security.

For this surgery, the Emperor himself wasn't present, having other pressing matters to attend to.

The technical personnel aboard the *Emperor's Dream* were elite experts who had served the Emperor for years, ensuring the surgery's risks were minimized.

As the instruments activated one by one, the Astartes transformation surgery commenced.

**Gene-seed:** Typically implanted during adolescence, it modifies the human body to accommodate subsequent enhancements.

**Secondary Heart:** A powerful organ that supports the Astartes' towering stature and explosive strength. It ensures that an Astartes won't die instantly even if one heart is destroyed.

**Ossmodula:** A short, thick tube that accelerates bone growth and significantly strengthens bone density over two years post-implantation. The Astartes' ribcage will gradually form a solid protective plate.

**Biscopea:** Greatly enhances the Astartes' muscle strength.

**Haemastamen:** Alters the Astartes' blood composition, significantly improving its oxygen-carrying and circulatory capabilities.

**Larraman's Organ:** Produces platelets for rapid clotting.

**Catalepsean Node:** Regulates sleep, allowing parts of the brain to rest in shifts during severe sleep deprivation.

**Preomnor:** Located above the original stomach, it processes toxic or inedible substances.

**Omophagea:** Located in the spine, it allows the Astartes to gain information and memories from consumed organisms.

**Multi-lung:** Processes toxic gases, preventing gas poisoning.

**Occulobe:** Located in the brain, it provides hormonal and genetic stimuli to enhance vision, enabling night vision.

**Lyman's Ear:** Enhances hearing, expands auditory range, and improves sense of direction, preventing dizziness.

**Sus-an Membrane:** Induces a state of suspended animation in near-death situations to increase survival chances.

**Melanochrome:** Adjusts skin pigmentation to resist various radiation levels.

**Oolitic Kidney:** Improves the circulatory system, accelerating detoxification and blood circulation.

**Neuroglottis:** Allows the Astartes to discern the composition and substances in food.

**Mucranoid:** Alters sweat composition to act as a natural cleanser and provides a degree of protection.

**Betcher's Gland:** Makes the Astartes' saliva toxic and corrosive.

**Progenoid Glands:** Over time, they produce gene-seeds. An Astartes can produce two mature gene-seeds, each containing a lifetime of combat experience and capable of cultivating a full set of Astartes organs.

**Black Carapace:** The final organ, located beneath the skin, grows into a subdermal "black carapace" over several months post-implantation. It's essential for interfacing directly with power armor.

Nineteen organs were methodically implanted. Typically, these organs would be implanted in stages, but they were all introduced in a single prolonged procedure.

The surgery took an extraordinarily long time, spanning several months.

Hades's body's inherent rejection of these organs meant that their integration had to be exceedingly slow and careful. Every vascular and neural connection set off alarms, and despite being heavily sedated, Hades's body reacted violently, sweat pouring from his brow and his eyelids twitching uncontrollably.

When the final organ was safely implanted and the last incision sutured, all the researchers present heaved a sigh of relief.

The task the Emperor entrusted to them had been successfully completed.

Hades was now submerged in darkness.

Initially, he felt an intense headache. He tried to reach up to soothe it but found himself paralyzed.

His left brain felt like it was about to explode, and his left eye was in agony.

Hades thought this was the pinnacle of his suffering, but he was wrong.

A tremendous force seemed to be crushing him. He tried to resist, but it felt like an all-encompassing hand from which there was no escape.

Just as it seemed the force would crush him, it mercifully stopped. Hades's mind trembled, feeling like a ticking bomb, never knowing when it would detonate.

His organs felt like they were on fire, as if they had grown limbs and were assaulting him from within.

This agonizing process felt endless. Months? Years? Centuries? Or just a moment?

All Hades knew was that it lasted a very long time. So long that he felt he was on the brink of death.

Then, suddenly, the pain vanished.

Unable to endure any longer, Hades's consciousness sank back into the abyss.