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Warhammer 40K: I Don’t Want to Be a Tin Can!

This is a translation- Original Author: Night Tales by a Dim Lamp In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war. The Emperor walks among men, striving to restore the glory of the Imperium. Yet, the fate of humanity has long been toyed with by the malevolent Chaos Gods. In this tumultuous future, there is naught but endless darkness and warfare. That is, until the appearance of a Deathwatch Marine named Hades. As the threads of destiny intertwine, can this outsider change the tragic fate that awaits countless souls? The gods place their bets. Yet, Hades remains oblivious to all of this. At present, he's weeping like a snotling that's had its toe stepped on. "Emperor's mercy! Why am I in the Warhammer universe?!" "And why in Terra's name am I a Deathwatch Marine?!" "Is it too late to bash my head in and respawn?!" A comedic tale where a nerdy, unserious protagonist finds himself in the grimdark Warhammer world, oscillating between moments of sheer terror and bouts of uncontrollable sobbing.

Read_and_Chill · Book&Literature
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Chapter 113: I'm Out, No More Studying for Me

Four years later, on Mars.

Hades, a rarity, sat in the mess hall of the Techmarine base, surrounded by Techmarines from various legions.

They were there to bid him farewell.

The red soil of the Martian wastelands rolled under the storms, time subtly intertwined, passing slowly.

Ah, the memory of bidding farewell to Moonwolf was still fresh. In the blink of an eye, it was his turn to leave.

Hades wasn't supposed to leave now. He was supposed to be the second-to-last to leave among this group.

But he had completed all his tasks!

Having achieved the title of "Fastest Legend of the Martian Techmarines", Hades laughed heartily, directly receiving his graduation code from the Sage Jordan, along with his exclusive Techmarine binary badge.

Sage Jordan's hunched yet massive form was squeezed in front of his workstation. His red robe hung loosely, with cables intricately woven throughout, and blue pulses flowed through them as if alive.

"Congratulations, Sergeant Hades of the Death Guard. From now on, you can serve as a qualified Techmarine on the frontlines."

"You could have stayed a bit longer. I believe a Techmarine with your talent could learn much more here."

"Thank you for your kindness, Sage Jordan."

"But my legion calls me back."

Hades nodded. He had actually finished his training a while ago, but he had been waiting to find a fleet from Mars that could take him to the Death Guard, so he hadn't left.

Typically, Techmarines would leave Mars aboard their legion's ships that came to transport weapons and ammunition. These ships often also brought new Techmarines. Unfortunately, since the Death Guard hadn't engaged in any large-scale wars and were well-equipped, they didn't need additional armaments from Mars.

It wouldn't make sense to dispatch a fleet just to pick him up. Moreover, the Death Guard had received orders to head to the Vassalrus war zone, and the massive legion was now rushing to the frontlines at full speed.

The Reaper flew out of his domain in the Barbarus star system, his black robe fluttering, eagerly seeking the first casualty.

Hades had been monitoring the movements of the Martian transport ships, but the bad news was that the legions fighting the Orks didn't need support from Mars.

However, now, Sage Keklan contacted Hades, saying he had found the source of the ornament Hades had once inquired about—

It was an ornament found during a space junk cleanup. The Sage who found it traced it back to the ship's home planet based on the information on the ship.

Since there was nothing technologically noteworthy on the derelict ship, the planet had been quietly listed by the exploratory Sages. They had only sent a small team for a preliminary scan of the planet, retrieved some anti-aging machine technology, and then left the planet be.

Until Sage Keklan actively sought out this Sage.

"I knew you tech enthusiasts would come looking for me."

The Sage's non-mechanical eyes were clouded, and his logical calculations were activated.

"Yes, your judgment is correct."

"Let's discuss the price then."

Sage Keklan, with his typical mechanical appearance, spoke confidently, a small black stone pendant swinging as he moved.

The two Sages' computational engines ignited simultaneously! It was a war of binary language waves, abandoning traditional speech!

Of course, Hades was unaware of this bargaining battle between the two Sages. He only knew that Sage Keklan had approached him with a victorious demeanor.

"Lord Hades, I've found it!"

Found what?

Hades, having thrown the matter with Keklan to the back of his mind years ago, looked puzzled.

"?"

"The ornament you once asked me about. I've found it!"

Sage Keklan emitted an ambiguous electric crackling sound, as if chastising Hades for his forgetfulness.

"Oh! Right!"

Hades remembered.

"What about it?"

So, Sage Keklan quickly sent the intelligence data packet to Hades.

It was a lost human planet, but for some reason, there were no living humans on it.

Abandoned human cities lay scattered across the planet.

But that wasn't the main point. The highlight was a small black obelisk on the planet.

Based on the information from the Sage, Hades initially deduced that it was a device established by the Necrons in the physical universe to shield the Warp.

These black stone constructs varied, but most could calm the tides of the Warp, making the physical world more stable.

Some black stone devices were deliberately built in worlds where the barrier between the physical universe and the Warp was weak, to stabilize the space there.

Although some Necrons might emerge from some of these black stone devices, not all of them had Necrons wrapped in oil paper buried beneath. This planet only had a lone black stone device and had once been colonized by humans, so it was highly unlikely that there were any surprises buried beneath.

Hades pondered for a moment and said,

"You should go check out that planet."

"That black obelisk is valuable."

"Aren't you going, my lord?"

Hades blinked. Maybe he should go?

But the Death Guard's first battle, the Galaspas campaign, was about to begin, and he really didn't want to miss the legion's first combat.

"I'm still waiting for the fleet from Mars heading to the Vassalrus war zone."

Sage Keklan's black stone pendant swayed, reflecting a bright light.

"My lord, you can head to that planet first. I found out that a nearby forge world is primarily responsible for supplying the Eleventh Fleet in the Vassalrus war zone."

Hades blinked. Was it really that coincidental?

He quickly gathered information and found out that it was indeed that coincidental.

Moreover, compared to Mars, which hadn't dispatched any fleets, this route was faster.

The Death Guard was still on the move and hadn't received news from Galaspas. Even when they did, Mortarion would need some time to prepare.

"Alright, I'll go."

"Let's set off."

Before leaving, Hades numbly extended his hand once more.

That's why Hades now stood amidst the Techmarines. What comforted him was that most of the brothers' farewell gifts were food.

Wildwolf Manning was grinding his teeth on the side, fussing over the game he had hunted down, the aroma of grilled meat wafting over.

Hades knew why Wildwolf was grinding his teeth. Because he was about to leave, Hades had dragged Wildwolf into the dueling cage for a major bout the day before.

Hades guessed that Wildwolf Manning's injuries hadn't healed yet.

Ultimate Warrior Sevius chatted with Hades with a smile,

"I was thinking of asking you to look after the new Ultimate Warriors after I left. I didn't expect you to leave first."

Hades laughed heartily,

"Then please take care of the Death Guard who come after me!"

Then Hades, with a knowing look, turned to Sevius,

"Remember to pass on the data packet I shared with you."

After seven years of relentless effort, Hades had compiled a "Survival Guide for Martian Techmarines". It included everything from how to crack most

of the servitor behavior codes in the base to an analysis of Sage Jordan's behavior patterns. It aimed to give new Techmarines the best experience on Mars.

Seeing Hades staring at him with shining eyes, Sevius swore he used all the diplomatic skills he had developed as an Ultimate Warrior to prevent his lips from twitching.

When he first saw the data packet Hades had sent him, Sevius was shocked.

Hades was writing something... very new.

Sevius swore he had never seen this type of text before. Although it seemed informal, when he read it carefully, he found that it explained in a simple yet profound way how to achieve the most on Mars with the least effort.

Hades even intuitively used a template, which was very similar to the one used internally by the Ultimate Warriors for processing official documents.

It was truly... astonishing.

Although Techmarines arrived every Terran year, they usually just studied and left.

Techmarines like the Ultimate Warriors and Shadowmoon Wolves would intentionally introduce new Techmarines to other legions to facilitate their learning and life on Mars.

The forge masters in the legions would also drop hints to the Techmarines they found promising, offering them some tips.

But someone like Hades, who directly created a document for studying and living on Mars and chose to distribute it—

He was the only one!

Or perhaps others simply didn't have the insight Hades had!

He truly stood above the rest.

Whether it was his unparalleled speed of graduation, his undefeated presence in the dueling cage, or this "Survival Guide for Martian Techmarines"—

This Death Guard overshadowed them in every aspect!

And he didn't even realize it.

Therefore, in private, the Techmarines referred to Hades as "The Overlooker".

He truly stood on high ground, looking down upon the many Techmarines.

However, Hades was unaware that he had earned another nickname. He just confidently looked at Sevius, expecting this cooperative Ultimate Warrior to help the Death Guard who would come after him.

"Of course, it's valuable knowledge. Ultimate Warrior Sevius will definitely pass it on."

Sevius replied solemnly,

"Oh, come on, no need to be so formal!"

Hades cheerfully took the farewell gift cookie, representing the Ultimate Warriors, from Sevius's hand.

Give it here!

Sevius, in sync with the other Ultimate Warriors, turned around, allowing Hades to receive other gifts.

Hmm... Iron Hands gave Hades a hard-to-bite pancake, Imperial Fists gave a waffle shaped like a fortress, and Wildwolf's was a pile of grilled meat.

There were no rare screws, no wondrous weapons, even the gifts from the Salamanders were food. At this moment, Hades felt immensely gratified.