Silence

The Enderson Family is a name that only held power in the upper class. Famous for not only their wealth but also their intelligence, competence and dependability. Suppose that is why the principal is going on about my mother to my aunt.

"All of the Enderson have studied here." She told Catherine, "It's such a shame that your father did not enroll you here."

Good job principal, you just offered a young girl two years of hell!

"Oh, Aurelia!" She called out to me.

I turned my back, "Yes Ma'am." I said as politely as I could.

"Will you be a dear and show your aunt around campus?" She placed a hand on my shoulder, my shoulders tensed up. I managed a smile.

"Sure."

"Okay," She retracted her hand, and my shoulders slumped down, "well I'll get going then. Have fun girls." And then she left, leaving me and a smiley Catherine alone.

"Hi Aurelia!" She beamed, "Do you remember me?"

Remember the time when we were young and I pushed you off the pool and almost killed you? No. But I watched it happen on screen.

"Yes." I answered and then the villainess left the heroine to go with her friends. At least that's what Aurelia did in the show. I'm not Aurelia but I'm also not too keen on defying the plot either.

Look, I'm not an idiot, I know little decisions like these can change the plot drastically. And for me to find out what changes and what doesn't, the uncertainty of it all. I'm not the type of person to go for that.

I looked the other way and I heard my oh so dearest friends calling for me. I stepped towards them but before I could take one more Catherine spoke,

"Um, Aurelia.." Her eyes were hopeful, "Maybe you could visit me sometimes. I'm sure my dad would love to see you again and your mom too. Maybe even dinner sometimes o-or…"

"I'll.." What did Aurelia say in this? "..I'll have to ask my mom." Yeah that's right, hook, line and sinker.

I spare Catherine another glance, before walking towards my friends.

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Going home was the same as visiting one of your rich aunt for Christmas. Everything is foreign to you. Sometimes you gaze at the house in amazement, get lost in the decor and wonder how great it is to live in a house like this.

Until you have a sleep over their place and you can't fall asleep because it's too quiet, the bed doesn't feel right, the air feels a lot colder and a pit is in your stomach. That's how I felt every day since coming here and that's how I feel right now.

Standing in front of a grand modern house, a blend of sleek, clean lines and glass panels. The lights were shining through them, it almost looked like giant size night light.

I hesitate opening the door, a part of me is thinking of running away. Screw the plot, let the characters find another villainess to pound on, Seliana is an excellent candidate. Maybe next week, endure it till then.

The thought made me feel better, I turned the knob and entered. I walked along hallway, paintings displayed on the walls, paintings of me, and the family and memories I only have vague access to.

I reached the end of the hallway, there were paper bags, large and many on the table. My parents set them down, my mother noticed me and smiled, "Surprise!" They both cheered.

My mother walked towards me and gave me the biggest, warmest hug I've gotten for a while now, "Congratulations!"

Now watch me break that warmest down.

"Surprise, look!" She gestured to the paper bags, "We brought you all your favorite food!" She begins to sit in her seat, ready to eat with the biggest I've seen her all week.

My father leaned in to kiss my cheek, "I'm proud of you." He said, sitting at the very center.

I slowly come and join them. A part of me is saying to lie, that what I've been doing all week after all, nodding and smiling. Pretending to be their daughter and didn't notice a thing.

"Dear, I'm so sorry I couldn't make it." My mother said, reaching her hand to me, "I was so swamped with work and I couldn't watch you before."

Then again there wasn't much time to pretend. They were always gone. Good for me guess, they're not my parents after all.

"But don't worry!" My mother beamed, "Everything is set for your party."

I sighed, okay that draws the line for me.

"I…"

"What's wrong?" My father asked

"You don't like the food? It's okay we can eat out-!"

"We didn't win."

I said 'we' because I thought it would lessen the blow. Like my teammate fumbled and we all didn't put in the effort or something but…from my mother's expression she took it as an I didn't win.

My parents' smile dropped like a snap. My heart felt tight.

"I'm sorry." The words leaving my mouth felt like a prayer, rehearsed and refined.

"So," my mother crossed her arms, "Who won?"

"Morgan-"

"No, I want to know, who won?" She demanded, "From what school? From which family? We don't know them for all we know they could have cheated, maybe there's was a problem we could never know-"

"Morgan please."

That's the thing with my mother, she can never take a loss. Moreover she can't take my lost because my loss is her loss too. My failures are her failures too and she refused to have that.

I took a deep breath, "Catherine." I breathe out, "Catherine Enderson. Grandpa's daughter."

"What!?" My mother exclaimed. She gasped and looked utterly disgusted by the mere concept. Then she just…left. She got up and went outside and didn't come back for a while.

My heart felt tighter, I felt tears stinging in my eyes and I don't even know why. Why should I care what these strangers think? I shouldn't care. I shouldn't care.

But why..why is my father crouching down to wipe off my tears.

"I'm sorry." I said again, "I'm sorry."

————————————————————

The time that I was trying to sleep was cold and the pit in my stomach still remained. But what didn't stick was silence, muffled screams and shouting were coming downstairs. I could make out faint words.

"Catherine cheated!"

"My daughter isn't a loser!"

"Those cockroaches-!"

I pressed the pillow down on my ears, I lost once, once. And my mom is losing it. But it was more than that. I lost to her.

My mother and grandmother were very close, she loved her so much then stripped away from her so suddenly. Then her father replaces her as if it were nothing. Started a new life. Completely abandoning her.

I know where she is coming from, I felt something similar, the fear of being thrown away, that you weren't good enough, that they were so much better off with someone else than what you could ever provide.

But what about me? What about Aurelia? Her daughter? Why can't she see that it not only her who is hurting?

I felt my pillow dampened. I cursed under my breath as I wiped my eyes. Oh well, like my past psychiatrist said, you can't control others' actions, you can control yours. So in other words; ignore it.

Just ignore it.

Ignore it.