Suppressing the heavy feeling of injustice in my heart, I bend down to pick up my money, which only garnering more scorn.
"Why did she bend down so pathetically like that? Does she not have any pride at all?"
"I bet she is just seeking attention. You know how everyone ignores her existence."
"I wish she cut out the pitiful act. I am embarrassed just by looking at her!"
"What a boring girl. And here I thought there will be a good drama."
I turned a deaf ear toward the insults they threw at me. They are just bystanders, and I didn't want to hurt myself further by taking their insults to heart.
After picking up my money, I planned to just go away from here. But somehow, I stay rooted in my place. My blood was boiling as I stared at the bread seller auntie.
Instead of guilt, the auntie lifted her chin haughtily toward me. She was sure that I won't dare to do anything since everyone in the room was against me.
I didn't want to make my school life more difficult than it was, but somewhere in my heart, I just can't accept how this auntie just treated me.
No, Eirlys. You have gone this far. Don't waste it for someone like her. Think about your scholarship!
I pressed my lips in a thin smile as I looked away. I could hear a smug snort from behind me as she ridiculed me further. "What a nuisance. I won't sell anything to a lowlife like you!"
I clenched my fist tightly, repeatedly chanting inside my head to usher the irritation away. She is not worth it, she is not worth it.
"Well, what do we have here?"
All attention was immediately shifted as a soft, melodious voice echoed in the quiet room. I didn't have to turn my head to know who that voice belongs to.
My gaze was met with hers as her lips curved upward. "Do you need help?"
As she approached, I could hear whispers going around, mentioning how beautiful and kind she was for trying to stand up for a pest like me. But I know more than anybody, for Carla Meyer was anything but kind.
I could see her two friends, Bea and Lory crept out behind her while giving me a scornful look. Getting out of this situation by ignoring Carla was a bad idea, so I only shook my head while replying, "No, thanks. I am about to leave anyway."
"Leaving so soon? Don't be like that. Let's eat together," said Carla as she took a step closer to me. Bea and Lory looked at her incredulously, as if she was crazy for inviting me, but they said nothing.
"No, I am fine. You should eat with your friends."
"But you are my friend, as well. Come, the meal is on me today!" She winked at me playfully, making it looked like we are close friends and getting along well.
I snorted inwardly. What is she planning this time?
Seeing my reluctance, Carla feigned an innocent expression and walked toward the bread stand with a smile. "Auntie, I'd like to take one of each for my friend."
"This.."
"You won't sell anything to Eirlys, but you will sell it to me, right?"
The auntie hesitated a bit before unwillingly packed some. She glared at me unhappily. "You should feel grateful. This is the only time I would let my bread be eaten by someone like you."
Carla thanked the auntie before skipping to my side. "You should tell me you like to eat bread, and I will help you buy some."
I stared at the plastic bag containing few pieces of bread in front of me. She was definitely up to something. I didn't believe she was doing this to help me.
"What's wrong? You are not going to take it?" asked Carla with a sad expression. "You would need more energy if you want to take the lesson well. Don't be ashamed, as I am not doing it out of charity."
She said that, but her eyes said otherwise. Her eyes were full of mockery, and her lips curved upward amusedly as if she found the sight of me pathetic and laughable. They said the eyes are the window of the soul, and I never realized how true that statement was until now.
She was clearly provoking me. She wanted me to get out of control and let everyone see how wild and vicious I am.
Nevertheless, the whispers become louder as everyone marveled at her generosity. At the same time, they despised me more for being ungrateful.
So that's what you're after.
Well, if that's what you desired, two can play this game. You looked down on me too much. My pride couldn't be more bruised than it already is.
I lifted the corner of my mouth upward. Mustering every strength of my face muscle to form the most innocent and harmless smile. "Wow thank you so much! What would I do without you!" I said as I bit the bullet.
Carla was still smiling, but her eyes look considerably colder. "We are friends! That is what I should do."
"Next time, it'll be on me then!" I said as I embraced her arm affectionately.
Just like I thought, she flinched upon feeling my touch on her. Her face twitched ever so slightly, but I feigned ignorance and tilted my head in confusion. "What's wrong? You'll invite me again next time right? At that time, it's my turn to treat you!"
Carla keeps quiet while trying to hide her displeasure. She pulled her hand from mine while smiling forcefully, clearly unwilling but she didn't have any choice but to continue the charade. "Of course. Shall we eat together, then?"
I can let her mock me, but I definitely won't give her the satisfaction of bullying me. My earlier act is just a subtle reminder for her. A reminder that she can't manipulate me that easily. A person as smart as Carla can definitely feel it.
However, it's still dangerous to provoke her too much. To Carla, my existence was equal to ants crawling beneath her feet. If I accept her offer, I'll bite more than I can chew and it'll bite back on me someday. So, I politely took a step behind.
"No, thanks. I need to go back to the classroom anyway. I need to clean my desk."
Me being bullied had already become a public secret among the students. Everyone knows about it anyway, might as well use it as an excuse to retreat for now.
Still immersed in her good friend act, Carla looked at me worriedly. "Do you need help to clean it?"
"I am fine. Enjoy your meal, Carla. See you later!"
I walked away from the cafeteria while ignoring the stare of other students. They whispered about something, but I didn't even want to bother guessing what they were talking about. My heart was heavy as I think about how Carla going to get back at me later.
It was a horrible experience of public humiliation, but hey, at least I got these pieces of bread for free.