Chapter 9

Shera was walking behind Gerard as he made his way through the hospital. People would wave and he'd smile at them, occasionally moving closer to her and holding her to his side. She rolled her eyes a bit and pushed at his hands the fourth time, "Gerard. Stop, please."

"They'd take advantage of you if I let go," he sniffed quietly. "These guys are close to being feral and you've never fought one off before." It took Shera a moment as she looked into the rooms. People were lying in beds, hooked up to blood bags and strapped down.

"You really do have programs for everything," she mumbled.

He chuckled a bit and tightened his hold on her hip, "You know, this is how the pack gives back." She stared up at him, that soft, sad smile on his face vanishing as soon as he noticed her staring. "We aren't just killers, foxy. We have hearts too."

"Then how does it come so easily," she muttered. His shoulders tensed and he shook his head, leading her into a large office in the back. It looked much like his apartment; plants lining the walls, books neatly put away, and everything strangely clean with no pictures.

"Our last alpha had a hand of iron," he sighed softly, "Those teachings stick around, even as things change. It's okay, we can handle it and put a limit to it, but we dealt with the bitten more often than any other pack." Shera frowned and sat down in one of the chairs as he moved behind the desk, her eyes falling on the vine plant hanging over the side of the dark wood.

"So, how's that progress coming," the words came out more bitter than she intended and she regretted them. Gerard sat down, turning the computer on while opening a desk drawer.

"I don't know, how'd you sleep last night," he retorted. She flinched and he finally looked at her. "It's a process. Processes take time to go through." There was silence as he typed, looking at the papers he had pulled from the drawer. It was weird to see him so formally dressed for no one and not at one of those fancy events.

"Your uncle is using the card for what it's meant for. A few of your old pack has been here and we've found quite a variety of ailments," Gerard told her. "Some I haven't seen so severe before."

"What do you mean? They've been fine. No ones been-"

"Your condition is one of the severe ones," he cut in. She blinked and he sat back, staring at her with crossed arms. "You don't even realize its a condition, do you?"

"What is," she asked.

"Your shifting," he hummed. "The shifting you can't control. It happens more often in adult lycan who shifted too early in their youth. We found that it causes a chemical imbalance and leads to people like you."

"Well, thanks. That makes me feel so good about myself," Shera muttered.

"You know how dangerous it is. You weren't allowed to go to schools, were you," he asked calmly. Shera frowned and crossed her legs at the question. She hadn't been schooled like a normal child. The pack took turns teaching science and literature and the like, most of the children in the pack were taught that way and they were told it kept them from being discovered.

Shera had been lied to then? Again? Her face fell as she rubbed her head. "See what I mean? You could have been a physical trainer or even a lawyer since you like to argue a lot," Gerard hummed. "It's a condition that stops our kind from intermingling with humans and other races. I'm surprised you haven't had any of the mental effects besides the temperament."

"Wait, that's part of it," she asked quickly. He blinked and chuckled, nodding at her as her eyes widened.

"Those days when you're calm? Those are the real you," Gerard seemed to venture off into dream land as he stared at one of the plants hanging on his wall. "It's nice, those days. After them, you get unnecessarily aggressive and paranoid with me. I'm glad you found a focus for it but really? Me of all people?"

"Don't get high and mighty," Shera growled. "I have reasons to be."

"Or you gave yourself reasons," he snorted. "I haven't hurt you unless it was necessary, and even then I've taken care to try and alleviate that."

"You sound like an abusive boyfriend," she retorted. He blinked and rubbed his head, a sigh leaving him as he leaned forward, staring at her.

"You don't listen to reason," he stated.

"I don't kill," she snipped.

"Your pack has laws that are centuries old. Do you not see something wrong with that," he asked. Shera tapped the foot dangling in the air, scrunching her face a bit. "Humans that know that are in power employ wolves like you and I. Vampires even come to those that are willing to help them integrate. Your condition has cut you off from those opportunities."

"I've had plenty of opportunity," Shera muttered.

"Defending a pack that is now down to twenty members. Yes, I've seen," he rolled his eyes and stood up. He walked to a bookshelf and started going through the spines, stopping and pulling one down. "Your condition was one of the first projects I worked on personally. I know how to get it to stop and I know how to help you get control over the effects."

"I'm fine with how I am," Shera stated.

"I'm not," he turned around and stepped to her side, holding the book to her. "And you need to get better. Those that actually went through with the treatment and counseling have the best control over their shifting. You've already gained an amazing amount of control over it when you're not emotional about something."

Shera stared at the book, slowly taking it, "Stop flattering me."

"I'm not. I'm telling you that you can be better than the results I've seen," he walked back around his desk, sitting back down. "Now, about what they were trying to find. It's a project the research team has had under wraps here."

"If it's under wraps don't tell-"

"I'm telling my mate because she's about to be part of it," he motioned to the book without looked away from the computer. She stared at it and set the book down, scowling at it. "There has been a rise in lycanthropes with your condition. We found a strand of DNA that makes us believe it's genetic and there's dormant attachments we've been taking in."

"Dormant attachments," she asked.

"Genetics that could change everything we know about our kind," he nodded. "It also proves that the condition is passed down and inherited." Gerard turned the screen to her, smiling proudly at the scanned notes on the screen. "If anyone can unlock it, it's you. I personally went through each strand you had and-"

"That's a whole new level of invasion of privacy," Shera interjected. Gerard pouted like a child who just lost his balloon and Shera blinked. He was excited, passionate about what he was talking about. She couldn't help but laugh at it, the man in front of her giving a confused look. He really was just the geek, no matter how much power he held physically and politically. It was endearing in its own way and it made Shera's stomach for small flips in her abdomen.

"What's so funny," he asked.

"You're just," she rubbed her head, looking down to the book and taking it. "I'm going to be honest. I've only really been thinking about what you'd do in the worst light." He flinched back, his eyes widening. "I didn't think you'd be this way about helping people, even to the point of improving them."

"I run a hospital, little foxy," he rubbed his head, looking at her as he settled his elbow on the desk. "I don't like hurting people in the slightest. The difference between you and i is that I'm disillusioned. I know I have to sometimes to get things moving or to keep things flowing." She stared and smiled a bit, rubbing the back of her neck as she turned away.

He looked back at the screen, sighing, "This is what I've been working on. It's basically theories on how to unlock the dormancy in those that have your condition."

"So, you haven't done any experiments yet," she asked.

"No. That's why I need your agreement," he stared at her and grit his teeth. "While we have plenty of our own, they won't tell me when the experiments are going too far. You have literally battled me at every turn and I know you'll say something. You're not willing to blindly do as I ask."

"You're their alpha," Shera stared at the notes, scooting forward and scrolling through the notes.

"And you don't consider me yours," he nodded. "That's why I'm asking for your help after we get your condition under control. I need valid input that isn't adjusted to what I want to hear."

"What's in it for me," Shera looked him in the eyes, his almost desperate.

"What do you want," he asked. Shera blinked and sat back, Gerard turning the screen back to its original position. She wanted so much; to be free to travel, to feel safe and comfortable, she wanted to experience what humans did just to say she did it. How would he take that though? He had her as his in an agreement.

She couldn't ask to be set free in fear that he'd take back his support of her pack. They needed it but the one that pushed and ignored her complaints was gone. Her father wasn't there to force her back if that's what happened. He'd have told her not to be selfish, that the pack needed her to do what she was doing. In that sense, her father was right and she couldn't see herself putting them back in the situation they were in. She loved her pack; they were literally all she had now.

She could potentially travel though. There might be restrictions but she could go places, see the things she dreamt about seeing as a child. She'd still have a place to return to but for how long could she be gone before Gerard would think she ran away? She thought better on the big things, scowling as she stared at her knees and thought.

"I want to go to school," she finally said. He blinked and tilted his head before Gerard began to chuckle. "I have the equivalent of a high school degree but I want to go to school, with humans."

"That's really what you want," he asked. "Not your freedom from me?"

"You could take back the support you've given my pack," she replied. "I can't give you that opportunity." His laughter slowly dissipated and he hummed, the smile on his face now small.

"I would have," he nodded. She clenched her jaw watching his face as he stared at the screen. "There would be no benefit in me losing you."

"I still don't understand why you wanted me and not-"

"The red wolves are practically extinct. Did you know your markings are the same as theirs," he asked. She blinked and stared at her hands, turning them around. "Call it sentimentality or obsession, but I didn't want to lose something so rare when it fended me off so well. I have a bad tendency of keeping things that have rarity."

"My-"

"You're the first red I've seen as a lycan," he nodded. "Small and still lethal. Fast and still loyal."

She frowned and shook her head, scoffing at him, "You are a weirdo."

"I have my tastes. It just so happens that little lycan I fought against was a pretty girl with a heart of gold," Gerard mused. Shera turned a bit red and he chuckled. "I take it you're willing to help with these experiments? In exchange for going to college?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"With humans," he hummed.

"Yes."

"What do you want to major in," he chuckled. He motioned her to the other side of the desk and Shera stood, walking around to stare at the screen. He pulled her down into his lap, holding her there as she shifted in discomfort from the position.

"Major," she asked.

"Yes," he nodded. "You can be taught anything in college. There are degrees for different types of careers and everything. There are also apprenticeship programs and internships. It all depends on what you want to do."

Shera's head was swimming a bit. The pack had never explained college nor how schooling worked for humans. She was stuck and confused by the sudden complexities of it.

"I don't know," she admitted.

"Then how about an aptitude test first? To see what you're more interested in," Gerard nodded. "Don't worry, a lot of us have had to take these to figure out what we wanted. The adjustment to human society isn't an easy one, not even for humans."

"Humans struggle with their own social structure," Shera blinked.

"It's not as simple as ours. The human people choose their leaders through a complicated system of voting," Gerard nodded. "And it's constantly under the thumb of change. Some human societies stick to traditional means but most have moved on to modern concepts of government." Shera nodded and rubbed her head as he patted her thigh, "The test is on, foxy. Go ahead and take it."

"It's not going to ask weird questions is it," she asked.

"All tests ask weird questions. This ones a personal questionnaire that they give you suggestions based on," Gerard chuckled. "Go on, it won't be too hard."

"What if they ask if I'm a lycan? What if they ask about my pack," she asked quickly. It was across the board; no lycan would willingly or knowingly reveal themselves as such with humans. There was a long history of those that did being exterminated, put on display as trophies.

"I wouldn't have taken it if it did," Gerard smiled. "I won't let you do something that would put our people in danger or the spotlight. Trust me."