Do You Want To Have Children?

On their third wedding anniversary, Andrea and Ludwina returned to Paris. Laura and Pierre already became parents. They had a pair of cute baby boy twins who were two years old.

Julien and Francoise's faces looked like Laura's, but their eyes were bright green like Pierre's.

"Oh my, you are so lucky you don't have kids," said Laura jokingly. "These little monsters take up all of our time and they eat a lot too."

Andrea spread a picnic blanket on the lawn near the Eiffel Tower where they had their picnic, then took over all the duties of arranging their food and drinks. He did that because he saw Pierre and Laura were struggling with their babies. Ludwina readily helped Andrea.

After the four of them sat down with the two babies, they returned to chatting about their news. Laura and Pierre knew that between Ludwina and Andrea, Ludwina was the one who did not want children, and in their hearts, they felt a little sorry for Andrea.

"Hi Andrea, it looks like Julien really likes you. He has been staring at you," Laura said suddenly, "Do you want to carry him?"

"Of course," Andrea replied happily. He kissed Julien's head and carried the fat toddler in his lap, "Would you like to eat banana slices? Open your mouth. Ahhhh...."

Everyone looked at the scene with different feelings. Ludwina knew that Andrea would make a good father. In fact, he would be a perfect one. He was very natural with babies and children.

Unfortunately, Ludwina was still very afraid to imagine the possibility that she would have to bear children to make her beloved husband happy.

She was grateful that until now, Andrea had not talked about children at all. After three years of marriage, the man still kept his promise.

Ludwina took contraceptive pills every month regularly, and not once did Andrea ask her if she had changed her mind about having children and had stopped the pills. Ludwina knew that men like her husband were rare, and she was one of the lucky few women to marry them.

As they walked back to their hotel in Pullman holding hands, Ludwina could not help but ask.

"Andrea..."

"Yes, Honey?"

"You... do you want to have children?" Ludwina asked quietly.

"Do you want to?" Andrea asked back. He turned towards Ludwina with an unchanging expression.

"I don't know... I'm still scared," Ludwina answered honestly.

"Oh... then, don't think about it. I don't want you to feel scared." Andrea rubbed Ludwina's head affectionately then shifted the conversation, "We're lucky that Pullman gave our room an upgrade. They still remembered us from a few years ago when we stayed there. "

"It must be in their records."

"Now, we have a big sofa in our room, but we don't need it," said Andrea with a chuckle. He stopped walking and faced Ludwina with a broad smile on his face. "Three years ago, I was determined to return to Paris with you and stay at Pullman again to compensate for our experience of traveling in Paris. Because at that time, we couldn't do anything."

Ludwina smiled back broadly. She tiptoed and kissed Andrea's lips warmly.

"Je t'aime, Andrea!"

"Je t'aime, mon chérie."

They continued on foot with light steps towards Pullman Paris. Their room still faced the Eiffel Tower, but this time they were lucky because they came in the fall, the guest occupancy rate was not as high as in the summer.

The check-in staff, who recognized the couple, gave their room upgrade to a junior suite.

When they returned to the suite before dinner, Andrea actually did what he said to compensate for their last Paris trip. Back then, he had to endure much suffering because he could only see Ludwina sleeping beside him and couldn't touch her.

Now he naturally hugged his beloved and laid on the bed with Ludwina's head against his chest. They then kissed when Ludwina turned her head and found Andrea's smiling face. reminiscing about the past.

They kissed more and more intensely, and with the music from outside the window, played by street musicians from somewhere, the two made love.

Andrea and Ludwina's faces looked rosy as they walked out of their room and looked for a restaurant for dinner.

Until now, many people still thought the two of them were newly married because their attitude towards each other was always intimate and full of affection.

People said, three years was a quite critical time and full of trials because when a couple had lived together for a long time, they began to feel annoyed by all the little things that didn't bother them in the beginning. It was when the 'honeymoon period' was over and the rosy-colored lens had lost its power.

If they had children, the wife who was tired of taking care of the household and children started to pay less attention to herself. Then, her husband would be tempted to seek attention from beautiful women outside the home.

Ludwina was grateful because, until now, nothing had changed in her relationship with Andrea. She knew that none of this was by miracle or luck. Both she and Andrea always strived to treat their partner how they want to be treated, with respect and love.

This was the only recipe that made Ludwina and Andrea never get into an argument, even until they were in their third year of marriage.

***

Ludwina's belief of not having children collapsed one afternoon when she was sitting on the balcony of their apartment, typing her new novel.

She saw Andrea entered their apartment complex and walked through the recreation area and swimming pool.

He rarely drove his car lately and had preferred to use Uber or Grab after those services became available in Singapore.

Ludwina almost stood waving and greeting Andrea from the balcony when she saw Andrea wave his hand and greet the children playing in the apartment complex's garden.

Ludwina's heart was in pain when she saw how natural Andrea looked as a father. Ludwina knew that even though her husband never discussed it, to keep his promise to Ludwina, Andrea really wanted to have children.

Ludwina knew that she had never loved another human being more than herself, only Andrea, and at this point, she was willing to do anything for him.

Finally, Ludwina went inside.

She went to the bedroom and took the contraceptive pills from her cupboard and threw them in the trash. She would stop taking her pills and surprised Andrea when she became pregnant in a few months...

Now she didn't want to think about the pain of childbirth. She'd deal with it when the time came.

What was clear was that if billions of women in this world could give birth and survive, some were even brave enough to give birth many times– of course, Ludwina would also be able to do that.

A smile was etched on her face as she greeted Andrea at the door.

"Good afternoon, Honey. What were you doing today?" Andrea asked after kissing Ludwina and putting his bag on the sofa. "Miss me?"

"Miss you lots," Ludwina replied honestly. She took Andrea's hand and pulled him into the bedroom with an alluring smile.

Andrea was a little surprised, but he happily followed his wife into the bedroom and welcome her invitation to vent their longing for each other after being separated for half a day.

***

Andrea felt pleasantly surprised because, in the last few months, Ludwina seemed to take more initiative in having sex.

As a man, he was very happy, but he could not bear to see that his wife seemed to get tired easily after they made love. She seemed to try too hard, he thought.

"This weekend, let's go for a vacation in Bali. We don't have to do anything there. Just rest. What do you think?" said Andrea. "You look like you need a vacation. Your face is so pale..."

Andrea stroked Ludwina's hair, who was lying beside him. They just made love passionately, and Ludwina looked very tired. This was unusual.

"Yes," said Ludwina, opening one eye and smiled weakly. "I miss Bali too..."

Andrea ordered tickets for them and then put his cell phone back on the bedside table. He kissed Ludwina's forehead, then laid down beside her and hugged her from behind.

Andrea secretly suspected that Ludwina was trying to give him a child, but she still wanted to keep it a secret. It made Andrea very happy. He was over the moon.

He remembered that three months ago, he saw the contraceptive pill that Ludwina used to take was in the trash, and until now, he noticed that Ludwina didn't take her pills anymore.

He could only pray silently that his guess was right. A happy smile crossed his lips as he kissed Ludwina's hair who was in his arms and then fell asleep together.

***

After returning from Bali, Ludwina actually looked unwell and often felt nauseous. When Andrea was about to leave for work that morning, Ludwina was still lying on the bed, holding back from vomiting.

"I'll just work from home so that I can take care of you," said Andrea.

In his heart, he was delighted because recently he had seen changes in Ludwina. She had been looking sick in recent days, and Andrea suspected that his wife was pregnant.

But he did not discuss it at all and waited for Ludwina to reveal it by herself, because Andrea still kept his promise not to discuss children.

Ludwina gave a sign with her hand for Andrea to go to the office while trying to hold back nausea.

"No need, Andrea... I'm just a little dizzy. If I don't get better in the afternoon, I'll go to the hospital. You have an important meeting today, you know..."

Ludwina was already so eager to have her pregnancy checked by a doctor.

She was already feeling the symptoms of being pregnant, and she wanted to confirm it herself. The several test packs she secretly tried all gave negative results, while her body showed changes that she didn't understand.

Those test pack kits must be wrong, right?

She must get a doctor's opinion. She wouldn't be able to keep her pregnancy a secret and surprise her husband if he accompanied her to the doctor.

That's why she told Andrea to keep going to the office.