Meltdown

[Didn't you say you would do anything? What happened to that resolve?]

How could she be so arrogant? Did she really think she could defeat a god? Who did she think she was?

[You're weak. You've always been weak.]

She wasn't even mad at the masked man. In fact, he was right. At death's door, her determination had fallen, even though she had sworn to give her life for the cause.

After all, what else did she have besides her life? The new life in this world wasn't hers, and her old one was devoid of purpose.

[You're afraid of death? Do you think [ ] was afraid of death when he saved you?]

Callisto finally turned to the sound of the voice that had been echoing her insecurities back at her.

She easily recognized the person, pale and emancipated, with sunken ugly eyes that she would always see reflected in the mirror. It was Callisto when she was in her early teens.

That thin right hand, wearing a hospital band whose ID she could remember by heart.

"Shut up," Callisto mumbled to her younger self, still recoiling from the pain of battle, despite being in a dream state.

It felt like her body was melting from the pain, throbbing and thrumming like vibrations of fragile glass.

Her younger version tilted her head to make eye contact with the older Callisto on her knees.

Several pupils rapidly moved around in her eye as she made eye contact with Callisto, as if mocking her.

Her younger version smiled, a grin too wide to look natural for such a tiny body. Callisto never remembered smiling during that time of her life, and this fake image she conjured up was a mockery of humanity, replicating the image of a person without actually being one.

[If you want to become stronger, you have to sacrifice things, you know] The young girl with silver hair quipped at Callisto, her tone chipper.

"You're right." Callisto said, a sudden wave of calmness washing over her as she stood up, towering over her younger self.

Her hand reached out a struck the younger girl in the neck, and Callisto grappled her younger self to the ground, wrapping both of her hands around the girl's throat.

The younger girl squirmed only slightly, until she stopped altogether, the life leaving her eyes. Those wretched, unsightly eyes.

Callisto couldn't help but laugh, and without that voice echoing around her, the laughter was the only sound she could hear, erratic and resounding in her mind.

What a ridiculous experience. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of a small puddle that wasn't there before. She could feel a sense of dread creep up over her.

She looked at herself in the puddle and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw two regular scarlet eyes and three pupils staring back at her. Thank goodness.

Wait, three pupils?

-----

"Lady Patron?" Callisto woke up in a cold sweat, in a room she didn't recognize. It seemed like she was carried off into some sort of back room.

Despite it being in the realm of unconsciousness, she had a feeling that her eyes had changed in real life as well. She had made some sort of sacrifice with herself, and as a result, her polycoria was back.

A majority of her body was wrapped up in bandages though oddly, she didn't feel that much pain. It just felt really hot, maybe due to all the blankets piled on top of her.

To the side of her were the two people she had been sponsoring, the young-looking grandpa and the zealot.

Instinctively, she covered her right eye looking for extra bandages to wrap around her head.

"Hello, it's nice to finally meet you two in person, Fledge and Creed."

"It's an honor to meet you, patron. I'm ashamed of the performance we gave at our first meeting." Fledge said, bowing deeply. His mannerism did feel quite old to her, but to call their performance shameful as she was bedridden was a little bit funny to her.

"Please, speak for yourself! If that sinner hadn't shown up, I would have done fine!" Creed made a 'harumph' sound, her arms crossed over some religious paraphernalia around her neck.

"You said you wanted to ask us for something today?" Fledge ignores his fellow beneficiary.

She looked at the two. If she couldn't even rely on herself, how could she rely on others? No, this was a battle only she could fight.

"It's nothing. Keep up the good work. Tonight was an unfortunate fluke."

They looked like they didn't believe her, but didn't argue with their sponsor. She made plans to make contact with the two later, and the two left, the sun already rising in the east.

She had slept through the entire night and was left to fend for herself. It was, after all, an illegal battleground.

Her wounds were already healed beneath the bandages, despite several lacerations that she swore needed at least a week to heal. The healer must have done some intense magic to repair her muscles.

In the daytime, the area around Moonshine's Ale was less sketchy, with people going about their regular day, with just a few beggars hobbling around dark corners.

Her body ached with each step, the bruising of battle still very real, despite no scars to mark that history.

Callisto wasn't going to beat herself up for the loss. After all, she had only existed in the world for less than a year, and she knew she had a long way to go until she could really accomplish what she needed.

And that dream state she had been in, where her younger self reminded Callisto that sacrifice was an unavoidable part of her journey.

And sacrifice she would. But first, she had to figure out plans if the saintess was dead.

-----

An unending cycle of destruction and a control freak god. A god who didn't care about his creation as he toyed with their lives over and over again.

And yet, if she was brought into this world for one purpose, it was to kill that god. That meant that, no matter how powerful he was, Lux could die. And she would make sure he fell by her hands.

A god who couldn't see that the story of his world was changing. A god who didn't even notice different souls moving in and out of his world.

There were things that Lux wanted perfect, the 'true' story. How much could she change before Lux came in and restarted everything again?

It was a risk, but she had to test the limits.

If the saintess died without giving her any important information regarding Lux, she would have to destroy the church from the inside.

-----

Pandemonium erupted when Callisto returned the next day with messy clothes and a tired look on her face.

Rumors spread around immediately about her spending the night with an unknown man, going in the streets selling her body, gambling away her allowance, and sleeping in the alleyways after a drunken tirade.

Ridiculous accusations developed from baseless conjecture, but people didn't need facts to take the news and run with it, resulting in her getting another letter with the sigil of the royal family, politely demanding that she meet with them immediately, so she found herself at the castle yet again.

She still had nightmares about the last time she came to the castle. Callisto shuddered slightly, thinking about the corn maze that rich people call homes.

Thankfully, she was properly escorted this time around, guards leading her all the way to the lounge, where the king, the royal concubine, and Nox were sat down.

Out of everyone there, Nox hated her the most by a large margin. His mother, the royal concubine, disliked Callisto due to her poor reputation, but didn't mind her being married to Nox, as the Azel dukedom had such a large influence over the aristocratic sector.

The person that actually had the most influence in the room, however, was the king of Regalis, the centerpiece of the world, his Highness Regus.

As par for tradition, the monarch of Regalia discards their name once they take the throne, a representation of royalty having to strip away their individuality for the people.

The king was well into his fifties, and despite looking good for his age, there were signs of mental wear from a tumultuous reign. If Callisto were to put in her two cents, she would think it was stress from having such horrible children.

She took the only spot next to Nox, taking the tea offered to her. There was an awkward silence that fell over the nobles as they drank tea and tried to dance around the reason why they called her to the castle.

"Oh, yes. Lady Callisto, the guards mentioned that there was some sort of spell around you that they couldn't dispel. I'd appreciate it if you got rid of it. It could be dangerous."

"It's just a simple cosmetic spell. I wouldn't want to be unsightly in front of the royal family themselves, so I did a little bit of a touch-up. One of the sides of my face has become a little…swollen."

Callisto instinctively touched her eye, glancing at the reflection of herself in her tea.

It was fine. This was fine. No one could see through the glamor. Maybe the Master of the Mage Tower, but not these people, and not most nobles. That was all she had to worry about.

"So, you're not going to dispel it," The royal concubine said flatly, her tone implying things that Callisto didn't understand, but there was no way she was losing this battle.

"No, I'm not."

Silence fell over the group again as another attempt to broach the subject failed. Even the mention of illicit activities was considered debased, despite the fact that if anyone was to indulge in degeneracy, it would surely be the nobility.

Finally, Callisto spoke out.

"Evil fiancee of the crown prince goes to the temple to reflect on her actions." Everyone looked at her, confused.

"What are you talking about?" The royal concubine said, her voice laced with annoyance, yet without a single change in her expression. Truly, a den of serpents.

"Just thinking about the top headline for the upcoming newspaper." At once, everyone around her understood what she was implying. King Regus nodded approvingly, taking a sip of his tea.

"That…doesn't sound like a bad idea."

Nox's eyes widened, as if struck by a sudden realization.

"Wait, but the new saintess is-"

"Hmm? What's wrong?" Callisto said innocently, a twitch of a smile on her lips as she saw Nox stiffen, narrow his eyes at her, and sulk since he couldn't do anything about it. Unless he wanted to out himself for thinking a bit too much about Ethyl.

"Very well. You'll be volunteering at the temple of Lux posthaste."

It was a shame that all the effort to find a dress and jewelry would go to waste, but it was necessary.

Off to the temple she went.