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This Isn't Canon! (Or that time I reincarnated into an AU-Naruto)

When one reincarnates into the protagonist there are often two reactions. Glee or overwhelming terror. For her? There was not one shred of fear. After all, of all the Shonen protagonists, there was one above all that could so easily become broken in their setting with just a little effort. Sadly, it appears as if that Golden Thing that she had surprised had already thought of that, and so much more...

BalancedSelfInsert · Anime & Comics
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111 Chs

Sidestory 07: Orochimaru, Danzo, and Konan

-Orochimaru-

Leaning over the balcony his yellow-slitted eyes flickered with interest at the scene below him. "They have gotten quite impressive, haven't they Orochimaru-sama?"

Tongue flicking out for a moment, he turned his head towards the blue-haired woman and nodded. "Indeed they have Guren. Why, they might be our first homegrown Elite Jonin! It appears I'll have to have Kimimaro train more students." A haunting chuckle escaped from his lips at Gurens instinctive frown. "But what I'm more interested in is..."

Orochimaru didn't even finish his sentence, the railing he was leaning on was completely shattered as he lunged forward, the Sword of Kusanagi being drawn as a greenish-cyan chakra shroud appeared around him. With one swift move, he slashed toward Kimimaro who had been mid-spar with the Sound Four, and yet, even distracted Kimimaro reacted perfectly. A bone rose up from the back of his shoulder which blocked the sword, and in the next moment, his curse mark activated, forming straight lines and strange sharp turns all across his body.

The sound four instantly leapt back, and away from the battle. As Kimimaro turned towards Orochimaru, he slowly pulled the bone out of his shoulder and drew it into his hands. "Is this a test Orochimaru-sama?"

"Kimimaro-kun, there's always a test!" Orochimaru lunged forward, the Sword of Kusanagi going towards Kimimaro's bone blade, while green chakra snakes appeared from his body and lunged forward, greenish venom dripping from their fangs. The following Kenjutsu bout was short, but brutal.

Within a matter of minutes, Kimimaro's skin was nearly completely peeled off, but Orochimaru had to regurgitate himself, completely healing himself of the fatal wounds he had taken. "Impressive Kimimaro-kun but how will you fare against some basic Ninjutsu?" There was a gleeful look in Orochimaru's eyes as he asked that question.

Having molted his skin and completely free of wounds, Orochimaru formed 3 quick seals, clapped his hands together, and from the ground a titanic snake made out of water, that had lightning sparking on the inside, and a strange humming noise coming from it would rush towards Kimimaro. "Storm Style: Lightning-Wind-Water Snake Jutsu." There was a sickeningly amused look in Orochimaru's eyes as the Titanic Snake began to open its sparking maw.

Bright green eyes widened in shock as Kimimaro instinctively entered his Curse Mark 2 Stage. His skin reddened as bones sprouted along his back. "Dance of the Clematis: Flower!" A bone spear would form around the entirety of his arm as he rushed forward. With each movement, the spear would noticeably tighten up, before growing again, and then tightening up once more. Just as he was about to impact with the Dragon Jutsu, for a brief moment the bone spear gained a strangely grey color, and it was in that brief moment that Kimimaro stabbed forward. "Dance of the Clematis: Bloom!" 

The greyish-white bone spear stabbed directly into, and through the Storm Dragon, and he landed in front of Orochimaru panting slightly. "Impressive Kimimaro-kun! Impressive. Kukukuku. You'll do well in giving Naruko-kun an excellent fight."

Taking a deep breath Kimimaro would bow. "I live to serve Orochimaru-sama."

-Danzo Shimura-

Leaning on his cane with his right hand wrapped in bandages he would lazily look around. "Has Ohnoki so gotten that old he only sent a child to fight me?" 

The blonde-haired Shinobi riding on a giant white bird would sneer down at him. "All that's needed to take on an old fossil like you is me, yeah!"

Danzo would blink. 'Well, that's the first time someone called me that.'  "I'm only 69 years old young man." Shaking his head, he let out a sigh as the young Shinobi above him began to chuckle. "Yes, yes, very funny."

Faster than the eye could perceive his hands left his cane forming a singular seal, his cheeks bulged, and as he exhaled a singular wind blade left his lips and skewered the wing of the white-clay bird. "Woah! Not fair, yeah!" Plummeting to the ground the young Shinobi would pull out some clay, before with a hand seal it turned into a smaller bird that he quickly hopped onto, soaring towards the ground.

Leaping off it just as it was about to land, he'd barely managed to dodge the dozen air bullets that pierced the bird, and where he was just standing. "Another promising Shinobi falls. Goodbye Deidara of Iwa."

Instead of coming from in front of him, where Danzo was standing, the voice came from behind and below - it came from his shadows! "Shi-"

Danzo appeared from the now-named Deidara's shadows, Kunai heading towards his throat.

"Particle Style: Atomic Dismantling Jutsu!" A white see-through box enveloped Danzo, just barely not touching Deidara. The white box flashed a vibrant light, blocking out the vision of those inside of it, and when it cleared - Danzo was no longer there.

"Hah! You got him, old man, yeah!"

"Hardly. Danzo is far too clever for that." Floating down from the sky Ohnoki the Tsuchikage appeared, a stern look on his face. "I explicitly said you weren't to engage him, and what did you do Deidara?"

"I uh - didn't hear you, yeah!" Ohnoki sighed.

"You've ruined our chance to trap him Deidara. Go back to Iwa." With that said, he'd fly on up into the clouds before disappearing.

-A few dozen miles away-

Slowly patting the dust off of himself, Danzo would ever-so-slightly frown while staring at the sky. 'How close.' Shaking his head, he'd lean on his cane and begin walking back to Konoha. 'What a shame, I was hoping I could kill that new Lava-style brat before I was caught.' A few minutes into his journey a masked ROOT-ANBU landed on the ground and would kneel bowing his head. "Danzo-sama, there's been large movements in Sunagakure recently." Pausing for a moment, Danzo would nod before waving his hand. A moment later the ROOT ANBU disappeared into the trees.

"Curious. What are you planning Rasa?"

-Konan-

Tightly gripping the ink brush in her hand, with the graceful ease of someone who had done this thousands upon thousands of times, Konan finished writing the Fuinjutsu for the explosive tag. Looking over it with a keen eye, she would eventually nod satisfied. 'Good quality.' Gently placing the brush on the table, she formed a handseal, before with a poof of smoke the explosive tag turned from one to a hundred. 'I need to continue to up the quantity.' Packing up the newly made explosive tags, Konan would go to create more, when suddenly the ring on her finger heated up.

'Aah, that should be Kakuzu and Hiruko. They're finally free.' Pulling on her Akatsuki cloak, Konan would send her chakra into the ring, and a moment later her consciousness would be pulled to the tip of a finger of the Gedo Mazo, where she appeared as a translucent, slightly rainbow-colored figure. Looking to the side, she'd spot Kakuzu and Hiruko translucent as well. "Kakuzu, Hiruko."

"Konan." Nodding her head she'd start straight away.

"Begin your infiltration, the hunt for the Nibi is on." Even though he was translucent, Konan could spot the glee mixed with scientific curiosity in Hiruko's eyes, and the disappointment in Kakuzu.

"Very well, but I expect good payment!" Hiruko chuckled. "Shut it, runt, before I cash in your bounty!"

Stopping the argument before it could even begin, Konan would interject. "Of course, you'll be paid for your services - should you successfully capture the Nibi." After saying that, she cut off her chakra to the ring and found herself back inside her office. 'Dealing with those two is always exhausting.' Shaking her head, Konan picked up her brush and began to create explosive tags once more. 'At least we should be able to secure one of the nine.' 

A side story so I can mentally reset. The next arc is going to be spicy as fuck though.

Also, I'm pretty sure Naruto music mixes are making me go crazy.

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