Chapter 131 — The Aftermath

Pei Yueran sat down in her study, doing nothing. Her laptop was on, but she was just staring right through it without seeing anything. Her mind was filled with thoughts of what happened earlier.

Weren't parents supposed to love and support their children unconditionally? Why was it that in their case, they were given such nonchalant and even wicked parents?

Then there were parents that would have obviously loved their children if death didn't take them away early.

Her thoughts unsurprisingly drifted to Han Lei. If he was still alive, she had no doubts that he would have loved and taken good care of Han Yichen. He was the kind to be a great father.

Life really knew how to play games with people.

She was engrossed in her thoughts, thinking of how Li Chuanmo was doing when his call came in. Her eyes softened as she picked it. Judging from how quiet his background was, she assumed that he was also in his study.

"How are you?" She asked in concern.

"Much better. I'm sorry we couldn't go out like I promised." Li Chuanmo said, sounding calm. His voice was the same rich timbre it had always been. His voice made her think of rich, aromatic coffee, but Pei Yueran could still sense a deep sadness underneath, and it saddened her.

"I totally understand. We can always do it some other time, no worries. Have you eaten?"

"Yes, but I didn't eat much." The sound of a chair being pushed back made Pei Yueran visualize him getting up from his chair and going to stand by the window. It was something he often did when she stayed at his place.

"Me too. I really had no appetite."

"Same here. It felt like chewing wax. Xiao Chen kept looking at me during dinner. I know he was worried, but I didn't want to tell him about it, it would only cause him more worry."

Pei Yueran paused. She hadn't noticed if Yichen glanced at her at all during dinner. She was too absorbed in her thoughts.

"Chuan, do you think I'm a bad mother?"

Li Chuanmo frowned at this question that came out of nowhere. Why would she ever think that? "That was unexpected. Why do you ask?"

"I mean, sometimes I don't pay as much attention as I should to Xiao Chen. I didn't even ask him how his day went today, and what he has been up to. I feel that may be why he doesn't tell me things. I guess I don't inspire confidence as I should." She added, remembering the recent incident about the competition.

She had only thought about this briefly before, but now that her thoughts were being spoken out loud, she felt terrible.

"Did something specific happen?" He asked.

While she told him about her speculations, he listened quietly. He then said, "No, I don't think you're a bad mother at all. You have been doing your best, and it's plain to see from the way Yichen adores you.

"Maybe you need to be more conscious about him and spend more time with him, but I don't think a few instances of forgetting to ask about his day constitutes being a bad mother."

His calm and measured words went straight to her troubled heart, soothing it.

"Today was unexpectedly rough for us, and though it doesn't excuse things, it's most likely the reason you were so absentminded. Don't beat yourself up over it, just speak to him more and be conscious, okay?"

Pei Yueran nodded without speaking, and for long moments, silence reigned between them. In the far distance, she could hear the honk of a subway train.

Living so close to the city centre put her in close proximity with City M's super accessible intracity transport options which she liked, despite having the downside of being occasionally noisy. She liked the lively feeling.

Then Li Chuanmo added quietly, "Ran, please don't lump yourself with those monsters that call themselves 'mothers'. A bad mother is one who makes mistakes but doesn't care to correct them. The type that is selfish and wicked to everyone else. A bad mother is a mother like mine."

The way his voice cracked on the last sentence made Pei Yueran want to cry again. It was as if someone was poking a hot iron rod into her heart. It was so painful. She wished she could somehow make all his pain go away instantly.

"Your mother is Auntie, remember?" She pointed out gently.

"Right, what was I even saying? Mother is the best in the world." He said shakily.

He took a deep breath before saying, "You know, the reason why I have never called her Mom is because that word reminds me so much of that family. I called her 'Mom' for over twelve years, but she abandoned me without a second's thought.

"What are feelings? What is the point of blood ties? Sometimes, those blood relatives are actually bloodsucking demons in disguise."

Again a long silence, but Pei Yueran did not say anything. She just listened to him unburden his mind.

"Can you guess how many orphanages there are in this country?"

"2,316." She knew this because she had once been curious and searched it out, but also because the Li Conglomerate was deeply involved in charities.

"Ah, it's obvious you've done your research properly. That's correct. and there are 492 orphanages in City M alone, second only to the Capital with 602.

"The smaller ones house tens of children, but the bigger ones can have hundreds of children. It's ridiculous! Makes you wonder what the heck adults are doing, bringing children into the world only to abandon them."

It was very rare to hear Li Chuanmo use something that could otherwise be considered a swear word, but neither of them cared about that at the moment.

"At least something good came out of it for me. I met my father and mother and got to experience love like I had never done before."

Pei Yueran agreed totally. The Li couple really loved him wholeheartedly. The Pei family cared for her with heart as well.

"And now, I have you." His quiet admission, oddly, made Pei Yueran's heart flutter.

"Yes, and I have you too. Chuan, let's walk forward, out of that dark past and into the bright future together. Let's make sure our children will never have to go through what we experienced."

"En, let's make sure."

Both of them were currently separated by physical distance, but were fully connected in heart and resolve.

After a few seconds of companionable silence, Pei Yueran asked softly, "Do you plan to help her in some way?"

"I'm not sure yet. I have to investigate a bit—I won't put it past them to lie. I meant what I said though, that if they go through proper channels, the company will help them. But if they choose to be nuisances, they'll pay."

Pei Yueran hummed her agreement. It was what they deserved.

They bade each other goodnight after a few minutes of chatting. Their hearts felt much lighter after the conversation.

No matter what life throws at them, they would make the best use of it.

Pei Yueran smiled and finally got ready to work, but then she remembered that she wanted to talk to Han Yichen, so she got up.