Chapter 25: Morning on the Mountain

I awaken, stiff and sore. No matter how many layers of pillows you put on it, a stone bed is still a stone bed. Even with a warm Daji curled around me all night, I ache, and not just from our passionate activities.

She smiles at me. "How are you this morning?"

I'm not going to complain in front of her. "I'm in a house on a mythical mountain in China, across the globe from home. How could I feel anything but great?"

She chuckles fondly. "Good answer. But we should head back. This was just to show you a taste of what's possible. And speaking of that … breakfast is ready."

"You cooked?"

"NO. Do I look domesticated to you?"

I hold up my hands. "You may be a goddess, but you're not a domestic goddess."

She rolls her eyes. "That's what you people call Martha Stewart. Honestly. You have a lot to learn about deities."

"Martha Stewart is like a religious figure to some people," I defend. "Anyway, if you didn't cook … who did?"

More gods? Phoenixes? Hundred-year-old Chinese sages who have spent years on cultivation and increasing their qi? Foxes? Ordinary Chinese people who have learned to keep quiet about this?

She grins. "Join me in the dining room and you'll see."

I wash up in the stone sink. Why this place is all stone, I can't imagine. Except that Sun Wukong is covered in fur, and this place seems like it's carved out of the mountain. Very natural. Even all the plants are from the mountain. So, he wouldn't mind the stone bed. But the hotel bed where he sleeps isn't stone, so clearly, he also appreciates luxury.

Pulling on my silk robe, I pad across the floor barefoot. I thought the stone would be cold, but it's warm. This is good, because in many Asian countries, you leave your shoes off in someone else's home. Although … if Sun Wukong is Daji's nephew, and I'm her mate, technically this is a family home.

In the main room, several macaque monkeys bustle around serving us breakfast. From what I remember of Sun Wukong's story, his fellow simians made a mess when they ate. These monkey servers seem much neater AND no hair in our food.

"Thank you," I say, getting that "Planet of the Apes" feeling.

The monkeys all flash overly cheerful, rubbery-lipped grins at me. "It's our honor," one of them assures me. "Wukong would be unhappy if we didn't show you hospitality."

The food is a mix of pork, beef, vegetables, and millet. A hearty breakfast to be sure. I make a note to add it to the menu at the inn and call it "The Heavenly Mountain Feast".

"Thank you," I say. "After all, you lost a bet with him, which is why he got to be your king, and I mated with his Aunt Daji, so that makes me your lord, too."

They all huddle up like football players during a timeout in the final two minutes of the game, and one of them pokes up a head occasionally to gawk at me while we're talking. They mutter to each other.

Smugly, Daji takes my hand. "You're getting used to your new position as—"

"Royalty?"

"If you like."

"Still feels wrong to put your nephew on front desk duty," I mutter.

She shakes her head. "He's endured being imprisoned underneath a mountain, fought his equal, Erlang Shen, and gone on a journey of heavenly redemption. This duty is simple by comparison. Honestly, it's not as though he's a slave in some dingy inn. Your family—"

"Has run the Ritz-Carlton of resorts for gods. I don't know if you do godly advertising campaigns, but that should be our next campaign."

She pats my hand, warm and affectionate. "You're always thinking."

I keep going back to my grandparents keeping the secret from me—but they did try to tell me. Stupidly, I refused to come visit six months ago. I could have known about all of this.

I can't change the past. Yesterday is history.

"So, Wukong has no problem being part of the family business, then?"

"None whatsoever! Don't give it a second thought. He can turn his staff into a toothpick and hide it. Checking in gods and seeing to their demands … those things are simple. As well, he has a charming personality and is 'the Handsome Monkey.' Shall we eat, and I can show you the mountain?"

"Don't we have to get back to the inn?"

"Time has no meaning here," she chirps.

"And what about this wyvern? Does time have no meaning for him, where he is?"

She smirks. "Ever been to Glastonbury Tor?"

"No. I've been to London and other parts of the UK… but not Glastonbury Tor. I heard it's a mystical place. King Arthur, Camelot, and all that."

"We must expand your horizons, then," she says cheerfully. "To answer your question … it's a gateway to the faerie kingdom. King Gwynn ap Nudd rules there."

Faeries. Of course.

"So, I won't be late for this wyvern's delivery," I conclude.

Faeries. They're real. My childhood dream come true.

Daji answers my remark with an eye roll, her fox ears perking forward sassily. "No. As a matter of fact, we might find artifacts for the inn's collection on this very mountain. Things you can't imagine."

I pause while lifting my food to my mouth. "Like what? Another staff that collapses into a toothpick? How does Wukong do that, anyway?"

"Ask him to show you," she says mysteriously. "But he has armor and weapons of gold and silver. He refused the Old Dragon King's nine-pronged spear centuries ago, so you can't have that. But you can have weapons and artifacts that would make you, how do you say, 'freak out' with joy."

"Then show me," I say enthusiastically. "Show me where to find these artifacts."

I'm so absorbed in the conversation that my bowl is empty, and I don't remember eating. No matter. I'm going to find some awesome godly power-ups and bring them back to the inn to cross that item off my list.

One of the monkeys rushes in and gives me a gummy macaque smile while still dressed in smart clothing. He twitches and looks nervous.

"Erlang Shen," he babbles. "He's gone to duel with Master Sun Wukong, His Majesty, The Great Sage, Victorious Fighting Monkey. This is terrible news--they're dangerous as a team You must stop them!"